Korette Destiny?

Thin Line Between Work and Friendship - Toma/Yamapi [PG]

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 16:10:27 GMT

Thin Line Between Work and Friendship
tinyangl, 7645 words
Toma/Yamapi, Yamapi/Jin/Ryo!Friendship. In a rent-a-friend company, getting too attached has always been Yamapi's problem. When it comes to his newest assignment though, an Ikuta Toma, it seems his usual "problem" has gone one step farther.
A/N: Written for nevaeh86 for jerainbowbridge. Idea taken from this post on aramatheydidnt. This is a strange idea, I know, but I hope you enjoy it and that the characters aren't terribly OOC. XD

The first thing they tell him to remember--"write it down, stick it up on your wall, and repeat it to yourself when you wake up in the morning"--is the number one rule of the company. "Do not get attached." It's one thing to fake caring for their clients when they're pretending to be a cousin or uncle or friend or lover, but another to genuinely care about what their client is up to in their lives and the possible repercussions of hiring another person.

Except Yamapi has always been terrible at separating what is an acceptable amount of caring and what's crossing the line. So he just cares without minding the rules--which may get him into sticky situations like the one he had a week ago when a client complained to Ichinokawa Ryuichi, his boss, about how Yamapi was "bothering" him with his incessant calling and questions.

"Yamashita-kun," Ichinokawa says with a sigh, rubbing at his forehead. "This is the fourth time a client's complained about this kind of thing and you've only been working here for less than a year."

Yamapi bites his lower lip. "Ichinokawa-san, I--"

"Yamashita-kun," Ichinokawa interrupts. "You're a good employee. You definitely get more praises than complaints, but just the fact that you do get complaints shows me that you might have to undergo training again."

"Ichinokawa-san," Yamapi starts--trying valiantly to keep the begging out of his voice. "I don't need training again. I just--"

"I said might, Yamashita-kun. But this is your fourth offense. If I get another one, then I'll have to rethink your position," Ichinokawa says. "Now. Why don't you go and prepare for that next assignment?"

Yamapi nods before bowing. "Thank you, sir." He walks out of the room to find his closest friend and co-worker, Akanishi Jin, standing outside. When Jin catches Yamapi's eye as he's walking out, Jin pushes off the wall with a shake of his head. They head towards the elevator.

"I told you that Asari-kun would complain eventually."

"I get it, Jin," Yamapi sighs, combing a hand through his hair. "It's just he was so worried about his test at the party that I couldn't help but ask after the fact if he'd passed or not."

"Well, did he?"

Yamapi grins. "Yeah." He presses the down button and turns to face Jin as they wait.

Jin rolls his eyes. "Don't grin like you're actually proud of him. Remember, not actually friends. Not only that, he complained to the boss."

"He's just cutting ties, is all," Yamapi explains. The elevators ding with the sound of a car arriving on their floor and the two men walk in. Yamapi presses the down button before sighing. "Okay, maybe I was being too nosy or something. I was honestly just wondering. He'd talked about it for almost the entire time that I knew him."

"And that's your problem. It's supposed to be a quick hello, goodbye, see you never again," Jin says with a shrug. "You know that."

"Yes, yes," Yamapi sighs. "And I'll have to keep that in mind. Apparently, five's the new charm now. Ichinokawa-san warned me about my next assignment and how if I get another complaint, he'll have to 'rethink my position'." Yamapi even crooks his fingers to make air-quotes. He sighs.

"So what is your next assignment anyway?" Jin asks as they step out of the elevator and head out the door towards a cafe they frequent right around the corner.

"Some guy named Ikuta Toma. Another friendship job."

"Well, be careful. Your friendship jobs always are the ones you get the most attached to." Jin snorts. "As though you need more friends when you have me as your best friend. Aren't I enough, Pi?"

Yamapi laughs. "Maybe that's why I get so attached. I mean, I have you as my best friend. I think we need to see other people."

Jin punches him lightly on the shoulder. "Please. Don't pretend you don't love me."

Yamapi laughs again.

--

Yamapi meets Toma a few days after. As soon as he arrives at their meeting spot--a cafe two blocks away from Toma's work place--Yamapi finds Toma sitting anxiously at the booth, hands wrapped around a glass of water. Yamapi watches for a bit as Toma takes a nervous sip, spilling a little over the edges of the glass, and dabs his mouth with his napkin. Yamapi chuckles a bit before walking over and introducing himself. "Hey, Ikuta Toma-san, right? I'm Yamashita Tomohisa." He slides easily into the other side of the booth. "It's nice to meet you."

Toma nearly drops his glass in his surprise, but manages to put it back down on the table without stumbling. He grins good-naturedly, although Yamapi can still see the nervousness in it, and holds out his hand. "Yeah. But you can call me Toma." Yamapi's eyebrow goes up. "Well, we are going to be friends, right?"

Yamapi chuckles again. "Yeah. That's true," he says, grasping Toma's hand firmly. "So we should probably talk about the assignment. All I got from Ichinokawa-san, as always, is that it's a friendship gig. Why don't you tell me the rest?" A waitress comes by and places another glass of water in front of Yamapi before walking away again.

"Um, it's nothing big. I just need someone to go with me to this event and everyone I know--," Toma stops, hands moving to grasp his glass of water again. "Just. I need a friend."

"Okay," Yamapi nods. "What kind of event is it?"

"A launch party," Toma exhales. "I'm starting a new clothing line and well, there are going to be a lot of vultures at this thing and I just need someone on my side to keep me calm and sane and not freak out too much." Yamapi watches with mild amusement as Toma bites down on his lower lip before reaching out to place a hand over one of Toma's.

"I get it. You need a friend by your side," Yamapi says with a smile. "That's a big task though."

"I know," Toma says. "I've been wanting to get into the fashion industry for years and years, and these people are just so--"

Yamapi laughs, interrupting. "Not the launch party or clothing line. Having to keep you calm and sane. I'm not so sure I can manage." Toma stares at him for a long minute before laughing.

"Yes, well, that may be a little challenging too, but I'm sure you can manage. Ichinokawa-san told me that I'd made the right choice when I picked you." Toma grins. He then looks down and Yamapi realizes that he never actually moved his hand. He retracts it quickly.

"Well, I am one of their best," Yamapi brags before laughing. Toma joins in easily. "And just so you know, I am more than willing to take this on. When's the party?"

"In about a month. So there's still a lot of things to prepare before it actually happens."

"Perfectly, right?"

"Of course."

Yamapi grins. "Well then, why don't we get started? Show me to your offices. I'll help you out."

Toma's eyes go wide, and Yamapi can't miss how pleased Toma looks at that very moment. "Are you sure? You don't have anything else to do?"

Yamapi shakes his head as he moves to grab his things beside him. "Nope, I'm all yours today."

"Great," Toma grins. "Just so you know, I'm a tough boss."

Yamapi laughs. "Don't worry. I've had my share."

--

Is what Yamapi says, but it turns out he underestimated just how strict Ikuta Toma could be. He seemed nice and kind and easy-going enough from Yamapi's first impression, but as soon as they entered the doors that led into his workspace, Toma's entire demeanor changed.

"Toma!" A female voice calls from their far right side. Yamapi turns to see a petite female with short brown hair passing Toma a clipboard and talking so fast that Yamapi can't catch a word that she's saying. Toma, on the other hand, seems to understand perfectly as he nods along and then blurts something else out that Yamapi doesn't quite catch.

"Fuck," Yamapi breathes as the girl runs off again and then Toma's again bombarded with more clipboards and more papers.

Toma looks over at Yamapi with a smirk. "Trust me, not as scary as it looks."

Yamapi snorts. "Yeah, I'm sure. I think that rather than me making you sane, you're going to have to keep me sane." He watches as Toma signs another paper, orders another person to get something or another, and feel up some fabric. "We haven't even moved from the door yet."

"I've noticed," a voice says from behind him. "Fire hazard much, guys?"

Yamapi spins around. Then looks up and up. "Er, hi," he greets the tall man standing behind them, an eyebrow raised--at Toma.

"Inviting people over now?"

Toma rolls his eyes, frowning. "Just a friend. He's here to help out. Shun, meet Yamashita--"

"Yamapi," Yamapi corrects. Toma blinks.

"Right. Yamapi. And Yamapi, meet Oguri Shun. He's practically my second in command and a brilliant at making sure every little detail isn't forgotten."

"I don't think I've ever heard you praise me so much," Shun laughs. "I knew you loved me."

Toma rolls his eyes then tugs on Yamapi's arm. "Come on. Let me show you to my office and get you started on something."

Yamapi nods as he allows himself to be led to Toma's office. He suddenly feels like his senses are hyper-sensitive because he's acutely aware of Toma's tight grasp around his arm--his hands are warm against Yamapi's skin and slightly damp from sweat.

--

If Yamapi had thought the papers Toma had been handed before they even entered the offices were a lot, he would have to revise that thought because the amount of papers on Toma's desk were enough to fill Yamapi and Jin's entire apartment.

"Holy shit" slips from his mouth without him intending to and Toma laughs as he lets go of Yamapi's arm and slips through a pile of papers to get to his chair behind the desk.

"I know. I say that to myself all the time." Toma plops the papers on top of his chair onto the floor beside him before slumping into the seat. "Take a seat. Just put the papers on the floor down there."

Yamapi eyes the files. "Are you sure that's a good idea? I wouldn't want to disrupt whatever organization you have set up here."

Toma snorts. "Organization? Does this look like an organized office? I wish."

Yamapi does as Toma says and then sits down. "So, what can I do to help?"

"Well, before that, I need to ask. Yamapi? Took me by surprise out there."

"Sorry about that. I usually let my clients know before I'm introduced anywhere, but I just--forgot," Yamapi apologizes. "It's a nickname I've had since I was a kid, so you should use it too."

"Hmm," Toma says, looking curious. Yamapi wants to laugh because Toma obviously wants to ask more, but can't bring himself to ask.

"Go ahead."

Toma looks relieved before he talks. "I wasn't sure how much I should ask. I mean, I know you guys are supposed to ask about us clients, but do you care to share your own personal information. I mean, is that appropriate?"

Yamapi stops him with a raise of his hand. "First of all, you shouldn't talk so much about this. You wouldn't want people to know I'm hired." Toma nods. "Second, divulging personal information is all up to the person you've hired. For me, I don't mind it so feel free to ask whenever." Yamapi smiles and Toma returns it; Yamapi blinks when he realizes his heart skipped a beat.

Before Toma can open his mouth to ask anything, the door behind Yamapi flies open, narrowly missing his chair and blowing some of the papers off the tops of their files. Yamapi turns to find the same girl that had met them at the door peeking out. "Toma-kun," she starts, a little hesitant as she eyes Yamapi. "I'm sorry to bother you when you're busy, but there's some person outside looking for your approval."

Toma sighs before standing up. Yamapi follows the action. "Thanks, Maki-chan. And before you go, this is my friend, Yamapi. You'll be seeing him around for the next month." She bows politely to Yamapi. "And Yamapi, this is Horikita Maki. She's my assistant." Yamapi bows back. Instantly, Maki waves her byes before dashing off to some other task. "Maybe today isn't the best idea to get started on this. How about tomorrow you come in again?"

Yamapi nods. "As long as you don't have me organizing your office," he jokes as he follows Toma back to the doors.

"Don't worry, I wouldn't give you something that difficult," Toma laughs. That's more something for our third week of friendship." Yamapi chuckles as they reach the exit. "Anyway, sorry about today. I was hoping to have you just follow me around and see what I do, but it seems extra busy for some reason."

Yamapi shakes his head in protest. "Don't worry about it. I would only get in the way. Call me when you have more time, okay?"

Toma nods then waves bye to Yamapi. Yamapi waves back then turns to press the elevator button. When he turns back to look at Toma, he's startled by how serious his face has become in a matter of seconds. Yamapi has to admit though that for such a large undertaking, he admires Toma just a little bit.

--

It doesn't really hit Yamapi until he's telling Jin his latest assignment how strange it actually is.

"So wait, he's hiring you to actually be his friend?" Jin asks incredulously. "Didn't Ichinokawa warn you to not get emotionally attached to these people?"

Yamapi blinks, his hand freezes mid-air before he places the beer bottle back down on the table. "Well--Ichinokawa-san," he gives Jin a pointedly look; Jin rolls his eyes, "wouldn't have allowed me to take this assignment without knowing the details himself. So I guess it's okay..."

"Isn't it just a little weird though? We've never had to actually be friend friends. Just surface friends, there for an event or birthday or whatever and then poof. This is a month-long assignment, Pi." Jin takes a swig of his beer.

"Like I said, Ichinokawa-san knows what he's doing. He wouldn't have allowed it if he didn't approve."

"I guess. What's the guy like anyway?"

"Toma's a nice guy, dedicated to his job from what I could tell. Reliable. That's really all I know so far." Yamapi swallows some beer before shrugging. "I don't see why he needed to hire me though. He doesn't seem the type to be lacking in the friends department."

"Maybe there's some deep dark secret that he hasn't told you yet," Jin jokes. Yamapi rolls his eyes.

"Maybe you should keep your conspiracy theories to yourself," a new voice joins in. Yamapi looks up to see Nishikido Ryo sliding into the booth beside Jin.

Jin frowns at Ryo. "And maybe you should just keep your big mouth shut."

"Only if you do too," Ryo retaliates, snagging the third beer on the table they'd ordered for him earlier. Jin huffs and crosses his arms; Ryo snorts but doesn't say anything more on that. "Sorry I'm late, by the way. Assignment ran a little late."

"It was that party, right?" Yamapi asks.

Ryo nods. "Had to act as some girl's boyfriend. She didn't seem really interested in me though." He shrugs. "Not that I care. In and out, right?"

"Exactly." Jin clinks his bottle against Ryo's with a grin. He then gives Yamapi a look that only makes Yamapi want to sigh. It's not as though he hasn't heard this from them constantly. He knows he shouldn't care, but sometimes, things just happen.

--

Yamapi still ends up going to Ichinokawa's office though--despite what he said to Jin. "Ichinokawa-san, I'm sorry to disturb you," Yamapi says as he enters his boss' office. Ichinokawa gestures for Yamapi to enter, but doesn't lift his eyes from his desk where he's piling things into a duffel bag. "Oh, are you going somewhere?" Yamapi asks, shutting the door behind him.

"Yeah, newest assignment has me spending the weekend in Okinawa. Just making sure I have everything with me before I leave," Ichinokawa explains. Yamapi nods and stays silent, still standing near the door. Ichinokawa notices Yamapi's silence and looks up. "So is something wrong?"

Yamapi bites his lip before stepping forward. "Just a small question. About Ikuta Toma--"

"Ah, nice guy, right? He seemed a little nervous about the idea of hiring a friend, but I'm sure you're easing him into the transition." Ichinokawa smiles. Yamapi swallows before nodding.

"Of course, but I just... I need to know if you remember his... details," Yamapi says--stumbling over his words. He shouldn't be here, questioning. If Ichinokawa trusted him, Yamapi should trust himself.

Ichinokawa blinks. "Um, as in contact information? Because you know--"

"No, no!" Yamapi exclaims suddenly, shaking his head. "I--This is ridiculous. I'm so sorry to bother you, Ichinokawa-san. I'll just go." He moves to grab the doorknob, but Ichinokawa's "Yamapi, stay." stops him in his tracks. Slowly, Yamapi turns back around.

"Now, tell me what's bothering you."

"It's just--this isn't an assignment I'm used to. It's a month long and he's actually asking for a friend. Not just to act like one, but to be one. I mean, you reprimanded me only a few days ago about this kind of thing," Yamapi blurts out in one breath. "Are you sure you want me to take this?"

Ichinokawa chuckles, shaking his head. "Look, Yamashita-kun. You're good at being a friend and I'm sure you can figure out where to draw the line. I trust you won't have any complaints with this assignment, so don't worry."

"Okay," Yamapi exhales. "Thanks, sir. I'll let you finish packing now." He moves again towards the door.

"Yamashita-kun," Ichinokawa says, again stopping Yamapi in his actions. "I'm glad you came to me with this." Yamapi turns and bows, before stepping outside. Once he closes the door behind him, Yamapi sighs. At least he knew he definitely had his boss' approval. It was a little reassuring.

--

Yamapi doesn't know how, but he feels comfortable with Toma--despite what everyone thought, he knew there were limits to how close he could get to one of their clients. Toma was different though. Maybe it had everything to do with the assignment and how Toma wasn't asking for something superficial, or maybe it had to do with the ease in Toma's smile and his laugh and this look in Toma's eyes whenever Yamapi said something extra stupid--on purpose, of course. Yamapi knew he was coming really close to that line where he wouldn't be able to distinguish between job and actual friendship.

"So how did you get into Hagemashi Tai? I mean, you said you got a degree in marketing, right? This doesn't really seem--very marketing-centric," Toma asks over dinner one night.

Yamapi chuckles. "Too true. I got the job thanks to my friend, Jin--I told you about him, Akanishi Jin. He recommended me to the boss after I lost my job at this firm. I really needed a job in order to pay the rent and so I took it. Right now... I'm just enjoying what I do." Yamapi leans over his beer. "There's something so satisfying in what I do sometimes. I mean, sure we get the obvious "pretend to be a boyfriend to make someone jealous" or "pretend to be a boss so nobody knows they were fired." But we also get the ones where we pretend to be friends with people who can't seem to make friends themselves and help them obtain their own friends. Or pretend to be an uncle to a kid who's being bullied." Yamapi shrugs. "It's a weird job down on text, but sometimes, it's more than worth it."

Toma stares at him for so long that Yamapi can feel his cheeks turning red. Slowly, a smile forms on Toma's lips. "So where would I fit in?" Toma asks. "One of the satisfying cases or just superficial."

For a long moment, Yamapi stares back--not really due to "revenge" or anything, but because he really doesn't know. "You're in the idiot category," Yamapi jokes instead. "A category all on your lonesome. You should feel proud. Not often could I make a category just for one person."

Toma rolls his eyes. "Way to insult me after I made us dinner." He gets up, starting to put the dishes into the dishwasher.

Yamapi snorts. "And by made, you mean bought."

"What. I still had to arrange the table and whatnot." Despite the defensive tone in Toma's voice, he can't hide the small grin from Yamapi's view.

"You know, you'd be more believable if you weren't trying not to laugh."

Toma shrugs. "Win some, lose some. And instead of just sitting at the table lazily, maybe you should be helping out."

"Hey, you invited me here. You shouldn't make your guest do housework."

"Please. What guest? You're a friend." The words slip out of Toma's mouth so easily that Yamapi is half-uncertain if Toma's being serious this time. But Toma makes no move to take back his words or apologize--he just continues to put away the rest of food into the refrigerator.

Yamapi licks his lips before getting up. "Okay then, tell me what I should do."

--

"You're joking," Yamapi dead-pans.

"What?! It's a great quote. 'I have great character.'" Toma frowns as he holds up the green shirt he'd been showing Yamapi.

Yamapi laughs, shaking his head. "Of course, Toma." He tugs on the shirt in front of him. "So basically your idea is a clothing line centered around inspirational quotes?"

Toma nods. "Yeah, we all need extra motivation in this day and age." He tries to wrestle the shirt out of Yamapi's grasp, but Yamapi refuses to let go. So instead, Toma gives it to Yamapi. "If you liked it that much, you should've just said so."

"Yeah, we always need extra motivation," Yamapi repeats, staring at the message in front of him. "That's why you're naming the whole thing 'Think Twice'?" He looks up at an amused Toma.

"Yeah. And you can keep that by the way."

Yamapi grins. "Thanks. Also, don't you realize the jokes people can crack with that name? "'Think Twice' is what you'll do when seeing this brand on stands!"" Toma gives Yamapi a sour look, throwing a pillow in Yamapi's direction. Yamapi dodges the throw before laughing. "Oh! How about "You'll 'Think Twice' before putting these on!"?" Toma glowers, but Yamapi can't help his laughter.

--

"It's not like I'm unfriendly or anything," Toma slurs as he flops his head on top of his table. "I'm a nice guy, right, Pi?"

Yamapi nods, patting Toma on the back as comforting as he can manage; he also manages to hide his surprise that Toma had just called him "Pi." It surprises him each time Toma gets closer and closer to him without realizing it. While most people call him Yamapi, only a select few--Jin and Ryo really--call him "Pi." When Yamapi realizes that Toma's been silent for more than a minute, Yamapi looks down to find Toma just staring at him. "Wh-what?" Yamapi asks, suddenly aware that their sides are pressed against each other and that his hand has been rubbing Toma's back for the past minute.

"You're a nice guy too," Toma mumbles. "I'm glad I chose you, Pi."

"Er, thanks," Yamapi manages, swallowing harshly. Toma's gaze is still on him and Yamapi thinks if he just exhales, their noses will touch and--that won't end well. Toma exhales first, but he moves back, slumping against Yamapi's shoulder.

"Tonight was fun. We should do this again," Toma murmurs. Yamapi nods, his voice caught in his throat.

--

"Pi, what the fuck are you doing?" Jin snaps. It's been two weeks, at least, since Yamapi's actually spent time out with Jin and Ryo--and he kind of hates that he's not actually feeling terribly guilty about it.

Yamapi sighs. "I told you nothing is happening. We're friends."

"Right. And that's why you've practically been spending every waking moment with Toma. And when we finally talk, it's all about Toma and how amazing he is and nice and how you like him a lot." Jin breathes. "Look, you're getting in too deep again. Job, remember?"

"And why can't we be friends with or without this job?" Yamapi protests. "He's a cool guy and I like spending time with him."

"Because you're getting paid," Ryo reminds him. Yamapi glances over at Ryo who'd been quiet for most of the night. Ryo sighs and shakes his head. "Pi, this isn't even just a matter of you thinking he's a friend. I--" Jin elbows Ryo sharply in the side; Yamapi blinks in surprise. Ryo elbows Jin right back, glaring too. "I'm telling the dumbass, okay?" Ryo faces Yamapi again. "Look, you like Toma."

"I know that. I told you guys that."

Jin sighs. "You are a serious idiot if you can't even realize when you're crushing on someone."

Yamapi freezes. Then swallows. "No. It is not like that. You guys are just--"

"Pi, we've known you for years, okay?" Ryo shakes his head. "You like him. And while that's not a bad thing, you have to realize, he hired you."

"Stop it. You don't know what you're talking about," Yamapi snaps. "I don't. And that's final, okay? Let's just--let's talk about something else. I haven't seen you guys for a while."

Ryo and Jin exchange looks, and although Yamapi knows they really don't want to change the subject, they still do. In the back of his mind though, the thought sticks to his head. Well, that explains a lot, Yamapi thinks.

--

With only about a week and a half to go until the launch party, the work's piled up for Toma. Yamapi spends more time trying to help Toma with work related things that they haven't done much friendship related things as Jin and Ryo think they have. "I need you to make sure the seating arrangement is okay. And that all the clothes are in order," Toma says, checking off his list of tasks.

Yamapi nods. "I think Maki-chan already did both before she left." He slumps into a chair, glancing at his watch and groaning when he realizes that it's already past 11 P.M. "Toma, will you relax already? It's 11 and neither of us have eaten dinner yet."

Toma blinks in Yamapi's direction before looking at his own watch. "Shit. It's been so hectic." Toma exhales. "Want to come to my place and we'll grab something at the combini again?"

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea." Yamapi gets up from his chair, stretching. "God, I didn't even realize how hungry I was."

Toma snorts. "You're almost always in the mood to eat, Pi."

Yamapi laughs. "Well, besides that." He slumps against Toma's side as they start to walk out. "You probably can't wait until this thing is over, can you?"

"Mmm," Toma mumbles. "Well, I could do without all the extra work."

It takes a second for Yamapi to realize Toma's small hesitation--after all, once the party is over, Yamapi's job is technically over as well. "Yeah, same here," Yamapi jokes. Except Toma stiffens beside him and Yamapi curses himself for not specifying. "I mean, you're a tough boss. Running me ragged with all these tasks. You have an assistant for that."

Toma chuckles awkwardly. "Yeah, right." Toma rushes forward and Yamapi almost stumbles without the body next to him keeping him upright. He watches as Toma exits the building without even a glance backwards and Yamapi feels his heart drop. He exhales and moves forward, hoping Toma didn't rush off too quickly. They had to acknowledge the end of their friendship eventually.

--

Yamapi manages to catch up to Toma, but they're silent the entire way to Toma's building, inside the combini as they pick out dinner, and into Toma's apartment. Yamapi can feel himself being driven insane by the silence, but he just doesn't know how to break it. "Look," Yamapi finally says as Toma's taking a bite of rice. Toma looks up at him and Yamapi's heart constricts. "This shouldn't be awkward, you know. We--we're friends, right?"

"Right," Toma echoes. "Friends."

Yamapi smiles--hesitant, but still there. Toma returns it--just as hesitant--and then looks back down at his food. They continue eating dinner. In silence. Yamapi wants to curse loudly, wants to shake Toma and to stop the awkwardness, wants to do more than just shake Toma if he's honest with himself.

"Okay, that does it. What's wrong?" Yamapi snaps, putting down his bento. "This is weird. Just--"

"I hired you," Toma blurts out, putting his own bento down. "I guess it never really hit me, but after the party's over, I won't see you again."

Yamapi swallows. "Look, it's not--It's not normal for us and clients to stay in contact afterwards, but it's just like us and personal information. It all depends on the person. Maybe, maybe we could stay friends after. Why not? You're a good friend, Toma."

"How could that even work?" Toma says, shaking his head. "It's too weird. I just--"

Yamapi's whole body goes cold. He doesn't even realize that he's standing up until he's looking down on Toma, eyebrows furrowed and his hands fisted tightly. "Right. You're right. I'll just--I need to go now."

Toma quickly stands up, grabbing Yamapi's arm before Yamapi can even leave. "Wait, Pi. It's not--"

His body reacts before he does and Yamapi pulls Toma towards him, his lips pressing against Toma's. Toma's hand drops from Yamapi's arm while his other hand rests on Yamapi's chest. It must've taken Toma a few seconds to register what was going on, because soon, Toma's pushing Yamapi away--eyes wide and cheeks red and breathless.

Yamapi stares straight at Toma. "You're right. It wouldn't have worked." He walks out of the apartment, shutting the door roughly behind him. He enters the elevator, rides it all the way to the bottom door and exits the building. There's no sign of Toma anywhere.

--

The next morning, Yamapi makes his way to Ichinokawa's office. He knocks, enters and abruptly says, "I need to pass over the Ikuta Toma assignment."

Ichinokawa blinks at Yamapi before gesturing for him to sit down. "What's the matter? It's been three weeks since you got it. I would think you've grown accustomed to him already."

"Too accustomed," Yamapi says honestly, trying his best not to shake from nerves. "I don't--I'm not the right fit for this anymore. I think Ryo would be able to finish the assignment in the amount of time left."

"Yamashita-kun," Ichinokawa starts, but Yamapi cuts him off. "Sir, I think this decision is best for both parties involved. I just ask that you let To--Ikuta-kun know the changes." Ichinokawa looks mildly disappointed, but it doesn't affect Yamapi in the least. Not right now anyway.

"Okay, Yamashita-kun. I just wish you could tell me what happened to make you react this way."

Yamapi shakes his head. "I'd rather not, sir. Just know that it's for the best." He stands up. "And if possible, I'd like to take a week off."

Ichinokawa stares, before nodding. "Okay, Yamashita-kun. You haven't been called in sick once, yet. Feel free to take this next week off." He smiles at Yamapi before it curls into a frown. "But I do hope whatever happened with Ikuta-kun gets fixed."

Yamapi smiles, bowing, then exits the room. When he closes the door behind him, Yamapi shuts his eyes. "It's too late for that," he mumbles to himself.

--

It doesn't take long before Ryo calls him. "Are you fucking kidding me?" Ryo barks into the phone. "You're passing off your assignment to me?!"

"Ryo-chan, I just... Please. Do this one for me?"

"Pi, what happened?" Ryo asks, voice going soft. "You never give up on an assignment. Well, except that one time when you thought you were going to get beat up."

"Shut up. We swore we'd never talk about that again," Yamapi complains before sighing, relaxing on his bed. "I did something stupid is all."

"Stupid? We know stupid. You couldn't have done anything worse than Jin," Ryo snorts. "I'm sure you're overreacting."

"I kissed him," Yamapi breathes. "I shouldn't have. We were fighting and he just grabbed my arm and I couldn't--I couldn't stop myself. I just. Fuck, this is stupid, isn't it?"

Ryo sighs. "You know, you've never been the type to do something impulsive like that. Maybe you should actually talk to Toma about this. See what he thinks."

"I'm just the hired help," Yamapi says, shaking his head. "It's too complicated."

"Or," Ryo says--his voice changes as he half-laughs. "You could always follow Jin's example. In and out."

Yamapi groans. "Really? Is now the time?"

"It's never not the time," Ryo retorts. Yamapi listens as Ryo breathes. "Look, Pi. I think what Toma really needs right now is his friend."

"I know," Yamapi murmurs.

"Okay. I'll take the assignment, but I'm still pissed you just passed it off to me like that."

Yamapi chuckles. "Only because I knew you'd be perfect for it."

"Talk to you later, Pi."

"Good luck." Yamapi hangs up and stares at his ceiling.

--

His week's vacation flies by without much notice--not that Yamapi did much during said vacation. Jin stayed at his place for most of it and they played video games, got drunk and watched shitty television. Ryo, on the other hand, was so busy helping Toma with his event that they didn't see much of him.

"God, I thought it was because you were in love with the boy that you spent most of your free time with him. Didn't realize it was because he's a fucking slave driver," Jin complains over a can of beer.

"Yeah, well. It is a big event and Toma wants everything to be perfect," Yamapi says, staring at his still full can.

"Well, with shirts like those, who wouldn't want them?" Jin snorts sarcastically.

Yamapi looks down at his green shirt--"I have great character"--and laughs. "What. You don't think this is fashionable? It's going to be the newest trend and you're going to be jealous I got one before you did."

Jin rolls his eyes. "I'd have to be dead to be wearing one of those. Hell, I bet even my dead corpse would slide out of a shirt like that in absolute horror."

"That would imply you could even slide out of a shirt," Yamapi jokes. He's rewarded with a pillow to the head.

"You know, Ryo got us tickets to the event," Jin says, eyeing Yamapi over his can of beer before taking a gulp. "We should go."

Yamapi stares at Jin. The launch party was to be tomorrow and Yamapi had already been inwardly debating if it was right of him to go. Toma hadn't once contacted him since that night, and Yamapi wasn't about to pick up the phone and do it himself. Ryo had been very tight-lipped as to how Toma was, but Yamapi wasn't sure if that was because he didn't want to tell Yamapi or if Toma had asked him not to mention anything. "I don't know," Yamapi says, looking back down at his can. "I think it'd be a bad idea."

"Toma was the one who gave the tickets to him," Jin continues. "I know you haven't talked to him at all, but... it is his big night. And you've worked on this for three weeks. It's got to be a big night for you too."

Yamapi finally tips the can into his mouth and swallows. The beer tastes disgusting and he can hardly choke it down. "It's still awkward," Yamapi insists. "I don't think he'd want a person that would give him more stress to be there."

"Pi, you're just running, you know." Jin sighs. "You don't even know what he feels about you as it is. Maybe tomorrow you can find out where the two of you stand now that it's not just a job anymore."

"But--"

"No," Jin says firmly. "You need to talk to him. Just go tomorrow. At least think of it this way, if he rejects you, you still have me and Ryo."

Yamapi rolls his eyes. "Wow, what an awesome alternative." He drinks some more beer--this time, it's a little easier to drink.

"Hey, people would kill to have us."

"So your ego tells you," Yamapi snorts. Jin flashes him a toothy grin.

--

Yamapi ends up being dragged to the event anyway--like it was never going to be his choice in the end. He and Jin walk into the small hall and Yamapi has to admit that the place looks amazing. There are loads of people formed into small little groups, just chatting here and there. But there's no sign of Toma. There is a Ryo running directly towards them.

"Pi," Ryo pants when he finally stops. "Thank God you came. Toma's freaking out backstage and nobody can seem to calm him down."

Yamapi's eyes go wide. "What. Is he okay?"

"Just the regular panic attack that comes with big events. Come, I think he'll be glad to see you," Ryo says, tugging Yamapi in the direction Ryo had come from.

"Wait, maybe I really shouldn't. Wouldn't I just freak him out more?" Yamapi asks, his heart pounds and every step he takes makes his head spin.

"Too late for that," Jin mutters, following behind them just as they reach behind the small stage where Toma was meant to make a speech.

Ryo pulls the curtain back and Yamapi stares at Toma sitting down and just staring at his hands. "Toma," Ryo calls and Toma looks up. Straight at Yamapi.

Yamapi's breath is stuck in his throat as Toma's eyes go wide. "This was a bad idea," he mumbles to Jin. Jin only pushes him forward. "Er, hey, Toma. I just wanted to say--" He stops short as Toma launches himself off the chair and into Yamapi. Arms go around his neck and Toma mumbles something incoherently into his shoulder. Yamapi feels his whole body go stiff. "Toma!" Yamapi half-screeches. "I--"

"I can't do this, I can't do this." Yamapi finally makes out just what Toma's saying and he sighs, relaxing. His arms go around Toma's waist and Yamapi whispers back. "Of course you can. You've been working on this for so long and so hard."

Toma shakes his head, his hair tickles Yamapi's jaw but Yamapi pays it no heed. "Hey, you're amazing, Toma. All you have to do is go out there. They'll see for themselves just how amazing you are." Toma's arms around Yamapi's neck get tighter and Yamapi half-wishes that he didn't have to send Toma out there right now. "You can do this, you know. You deserve this more than anybody else, okay?"

"What if they think I suck?" Toma mutters. "You know, "Think Twice" before putting this piece on."

Yamapi chuckles. "Those were jokes, stupid. Even if they think it sucks, there's going to be at least one person in that audience that doesn't think that. You can convert them all one person at a time." Toma pulls back and Yamapi's a little glad to see that there's color in his face now. "You'll do great out there."

Toma nods, swallowing. "Thanks, Pi."

Yamapi pulls away from Toma completely. He grabs Toma's hand and squeezes. "I'm glad to be here," he says honestly. "Now go show them just how awesome you are." Toma grins at him--shaky, but still bright; it's the same grin that takes Yamapi's breath away each and every time. Yamapi watches as Toma pulls back the curtains and disappears onto the stage.

Jin tugs on his arm, leading him to another exit. Yamapi had honestly forgotten that he and Ryo were still there. "Now why can't you say shit like that to me more often?"

Yamapi's a little more than dazed at this moment, but he still manages to retort a "Because then you'd let it go to your head."

"That's for fucking sure," Ryo mutters.

Jin frowns. "Thanks, guys. I obviously need new friends."

--

The night goes smoothly to Yamapi's delight. Toma's clothes aren't going to become the next Ralph Lauren or anything, but most of the press is pleased with what they saw and think it's a decent collection for what it's meant for. "See," Ryo snorts at Toma near the end of the night when they're waving goodbye to the press. "I told you they were blind and tasteless."

Yamapi can't help chuckling while Toma rolls his eyes at Ryo. "Those weren't exactly the most encouraging words, Nishikido."

"What, and Pi's lame 'You're awesome' were? I don't get either of you." Yamapi feels his cheeks go red and he pointedly stares at his feet.

"And I don't get why you're a jackass," Toma retorts back with ease. "But to each their own, right?"

Jin chuckles. "I like you. You should stick around."

Yamapi's head snaps to Jin's direction as he fixes him with a glare. Jin grins widely before walking towards Ryo and tugging him towards the back. "Now, we're just going to go clean up whatever needs to be done in the back, and you two--well, do something."

Yamapi wrinkles his nose, but quickly busies himself with closing the foldable chairs and leaning them against the back wall.

"You know, your friends aren't very subtle," Toma says--his voice way too close. Yamapi looks to his right to find Toma working alongside him; he suddenly can't think.

"One of their charms," Yamapi says--trying to stay calm. "I wouldn't have them any other way."

Toma chuckles. "I can see why you like them though. They're interesting."

"When you use interesting like that, it sounds like more of an insult." Yamapi grins, finally looking Toma in the eye.

Toma grins back before leaning against one of the folded chairs. "You know, you shouldn't have run."

Quickly the grin falls from his lips. "I didn't know what else I should do," Yamapi says honestly. "This isn't exactly the kind of thing I'm used to."

"And I am?" Toma asks, quirking an eyebrow upward.

"Well, of course not, but... This is--was a job. I didn't--couldn't see where it stopped and... we started." Yamapi licks his lips. "But I mean, that's just on me. I wasn't being professional at all and you deserved better than that. Which is why--"

"Which is why you gave me to Nishikido," Toma finishes; Yamapi nods. "It was probably a good idea." Yamapi blinks at Toma in surprise. "I was having as much trouble as you were, you know. I mean, we were good friends. And I wasn't sure if you were thinking that this was just a job and you were being friendly just because you were being paid. But--well, obviously you weren't thinking that." Yamapi's face goes red.

"Toma--" he starts.

"Wait, I'm not done," Toma says. He exhales and continues, "I didn't know what to think that night. When you kissed me suddenly. I didn't--I hadn't really thought about you in that light. ...Kind of. I mean, it flashed a few times, but I was so occupied with work that--" Yamapi raises an eyebrow. "Anyway, I... I didn't hate it. Hell, it's all I could think of when I wasn't trying to finish this show or trying to get Nishikido to shut the fuck up about calling you. By the way, your friends are very dedicated to you." Yamapi chuckles. "I just--I think that this wouldn't be such a bad idea."

"What wouldn't?" Yamapi asks--even though he knows and Toma obviously knows he knows, but he still asks. "What wouldn't be a bad idea?" Yamapi licks at his lips.

Toma stares at him for a second before stepping forward. "You're not subtle either, you know."

Yamapi chuckles just as Toma pulls him forward and presses his lips against Yamapi's. Yamapi doesn't know how long they actually kissed for--all he knows that Toma's lips were dry and chapped, his hands are gripping tightly onto the front of Toma's shirt and that Toma's heart is pounding just as quickly as his own. It's only when he hears a loud whistle and applause when Yamapi finally pulls away. Toma stares at him before a grin slowly grows on his face.

"Fuck yes," Jin exclaims. "Now I can stop hearing Yamapi whine and whine and whine."

Yamapi rolls his eyes. "You wouldn't have it any other way, would you?"

Jin snorts. "Actually, I would." He turns to Toma. "By the way, we haven't really been formally introduced. I'm Akanishi Jin and these two are my bitches." He grins just as both Ryo and Yamapi punch him in the shoulders.

Toma laughs. "Nice to meet you. Ikuta Toma and--well, I was a former client."

"He's a friend," Yamapi corrects.

Ryo laughs. "I hope he's a little more than that for you, Yamashita."

Yamapi looks over a flushed Toma and smiles. "Maybe a little bit."

"Ew," Jin mutters, wrinkling his nose. "I hope you don't say shit like that often." Yamapi chuckles, then jumps a little when a hand finds his. He looks over to find Toma staring at Jin and Ryo intently, but his fingers lace Yamapi's easily. His heart skips a beat and Yamapi looks over to watch Jin and Ryo bickering as always. For once, he thinks, it actually paid off to care a little more than most.

Quest for the Magic Forest Part Two - KAT-TUN [PG]

Sat, 06 Jun 2009 16:23:33 GMT

Quest for the Magic Forest
tinyangl, 12,598 words
KAT-TUN, with appearances by Johnny, Yamapi, Ryo, Tegoshi, Takki, Tsuyoshi and Yokoyama. KAT-TUN is brought together by King Johnny in order to save the kingdom, but when complete strangers meet for the first time, it's bound to not be easy.
A/N: This... started out as a joke (it kind of still is XD). Something small I wrote after seeing KAT-TUN's Lips PV and couldn't get out of my head as being a fantasy story--mainly because fantasy is my favorite genre--and thanks to anamuan's prodding, I managed to turn it into full blown fic (originally all in comments, I might add) complete with villains and mocking jokes and utter stupidity. So please don't take this seriously at all. At all. I rarely, rarely write all of KAT-TUN in one go, so hopefully the OOC is not in full force. (OOC doesn't strictly apply to just KAT-TUN, by the by.) And I may be a little forceful at the beginning with the characterization, but I hope that doesn't turn anyone off. XD This has been over a year's project so I'm just glad to finally see it done.

Thanks so much to anamuan's work on this (and everyone she asked to help as well)--without you, dear, this never would have gotten made. ♥♥

Nakamaru stared at his teacher for a long time before turning to look at the broom in his hands. "I'm doing errands?" he asked, incredulous.

"It's a way of building up discipline!" his teacher insisted, arms crossed. "So get to it."

Nakamaru felt disappointed all over again. Ever since he'd been dragged to this place, a place that was not home, he'd been put through errand after errand. For someone who insisted that he'd never be normal again, he was starting to feel really normal. But he did what he was told, because he wanted to hold out hope that maybe, just maybe his teacher wasn't fooling him this entire time, that he really did have magic.

And just that thought helped him get through everything—all the chores and "lessons" where all he did was sit around and pretend to meditate.

"Light the candle," his teacher commanded him suddenly during a lesson. Nakamaru hadn't been told yet to do something so it startled him for a good long minute.

Nakamaru's eyes were wide with fear and nervousness. "But you never taught me how to!" he exclaimed.

His teacher smiled enigmatically. "Trust me, Nakamaru. Just think about bringing fire to the candle," he instructed.

The words did nothing to squelch the dread settling in Nakamaru's stomach, but he did what his teacher asked. He stared at the candle, trying to imagine in his head what it would look like lit. He wanted it to be lit, but the longer Nakamaru concentrated, the more discouraged he became.

"You can help it along," his teacher whispered. "Is there anything that'll get you to concentrate better? Help you focus your mind more?"

Nakamaru's mind raced with possibilities—most distracting him more than helping him—until he remembered the kids who'd been beat-boxing right outside while he'd been cleaning. He'd listened to them for some time—he didn't really know just how long—but before he knew it, he'd been done with every task he'd been given in no time. He tried to imitate their noises, and although his paled in comparison, it was a start and Nakamaru could feel his concentration coming together.

Something inside of him was coming together too.

He jumped back when in front of him a small puff of fire appeared on the wick of the candle – small, but strong. Nakamaru felt his teacher clap a hand on the small of his back, firm but proud. "I knew you could do it."

Nakamaru gaped at the burning candle, watching as the light flickered from side to side, moving slightly when a slight breeze picked up. He did that, he thought as he held a hand above the candle, feeling the sting of heat against the palm of his hand.

Maybe he could believe in his teacher's words after all.

~*~

A few days later (after Yamapi'd dug up as much dirt as he could on Ryo and Tegoshi's operation—Tegoshi was apparently nice and bubbly for someone who was on the bad side. Ryo wasn't as evil as he seemed; he just acted it more often than not. Tegoshi apparently liked puppies—Koki hadn't exactly been able to remember much else), the group made their way to the next town.

They found out that the town Ryo and Tegoshi stayed in was only about 4 towns away (a bit far, but still closer than they'd expected). Their supposed "X" seemed to keep moving farther and farther from where it was the last time they checked so they never really knew if they were near it or not.

Nights were spent in inns; the six of them huddled over a table, all trying to think of what they could do to get through this. But they were in silence more oft than not.

"Oh, forget it!" Jin cried one night, resting his head against the table. "Why are we thinking when we all know it's not our strong suit?"

"Speak for yourself," Koki retorted.

"Come on guys," Nakamaru prompted, exhausted. "We can think of something. It just takes a little time." He propped his head up on his hand, yawning.

"Because that's worked so well for us before," Ueda snapped.

Nakamaru stared. "I know you're being sarcastic, but I'm too tired to actually figure out why."

"He's making a crack at our intelligence?" Taguchi supplied.

"Exactly." Ueda poked at a sleeping Kame, who had zoned out at some point at the beginning of their conversation, before giving up when the young man didn't even stir, his hat effectively covering his face from the light.

"But we can't just do nothing," Nakamaru insisted.

"Why not?" Koki yawned. "Isn't that how most stories go? The bad guy comes to the good guy?"

"It's not like we live in a story," Jin said. "This is differentt. A haphazardly thrown together group of guys who didn't know each other at the start of this thing ordered to save the world. Doesn't sound like a nice storybook."

Everyone paused. "But..." Taguchi started. "It does."

Jin threw him a dirty look.

"Doesn't it?" He continued a little more excited. "Each person has trouble adjusting, causes trouble. And then one by one they get closer and closer together! And there's the bad guy, who tries to get them to separate. But each thing that happens only gets them closer to each other! And, and..." Taguchi fumbled with his hands, gesturing madly. "The good guys win, of course, because it's a happy story and we save the day!"

Everyone (those awake enough anyway) stared at him before turning back to each other. "I think we should just go to the town Ryo and Tegoshi are in and confront them there," Ueda said.

"With our luck," Koki started, "the magic forest will be right next to them."

"Ooooh," Jin cooed. "Wouldn't that be lucky?"

"Or fate!" Taguchi chimed. Everyone ignored him.

The next morning, they made their way to the next town—which happened to be Nakamaru's hometown. Nakamaru fidgeted all the way down the road.

"Oh my god," Jin moaned. "If you try to make sure there's no lint or dirt on that damn white vest, I will have to take it from you. Throw it on the ground and stomp on it."

Nakamaru glared at Jin, protectively clutching his vest to himself. "I'm nervous, okay? I haven't seen my family for years."

"Most of us haven't," Kame sighed, a little exhausted as he leaned against Ueda's shoulder. "But we weren't that antsy."

"Some of us don't have parents," Koki said dryly. When everyone looked at him warily, Koki rolled his eyes. "I'm fine. It happened. I'm past it." Beside him, Taguchi remained quiet.

Nakamaru noticed, but didn't say a word. "Either ways. When I left, they weren't very positive about me having powers. I don't know if they even think I did." He frowned.

Jin threw an arm around him, "Even if they saw you now, they'd still wonder."

Nakamaru elbowed him, laughing a little. Nakamaru had to admit—he calmed down a little thanks to Jin's nature. He relaxed to the point that he didn't even noticed that they arrived in front of his family's house.

"Maybe they're not here," Nakamaru started, standing frozen at the doorstep. "We shouldn't be here. They won't even recognize me."

The door swung open without anyone even having knocked. Nakamaru stared into the face of one of his sisters, who looked at him curiously. "May I help you?"

"I-Is.. I..." Nakamaru started, swallowing his words.

Kame took over. "Is this the Nakamaru household?"

The girl nodded politely. "Do you need something?"

A male voice from inside spoke. "Who's at the door?"

"Some guys, dad. I think they know us from somewhere!" the girl called, backing away to let her father take her spot.

"Hi, what's th-" The man stopped in his tracks, locking eyes with Nakamaru. "Yuichi?" He murmured, voice low.

Nakamaru swallowed before nodding.

The man's face dropped. "I'm sorry," he muttered before he nudged his daughter out of the way, his eyes still locked with Nakamaru's. "I have to do this." Slowly, Nakamaru watched as the door shut in front of him. He felt his heart squeeze and his stomach churn.

"What in the hell?!" Jin yelled, breaking the silence. He turned to Nakamaru. "Want me to blow it down?"

"This isn't 'The Three Little Pigs,'" Koki retorted.

"Yeah. I think lightning'd be more effective anyway," Ueda snapped, eyes blazing.

Kame's hand rested on Nakamaru's shoulder. "Are you okay?" he asked softly.

Nakamaru nodded. "Yeah. Yeah. There... There had to be a good reason. He apologized, right?"

Taguchi smiled, although it was forced. "Definitely a reason. We'll find out."

"We'll find out," Jin vowed. "Definitely."

Nakamaru nodded, then turned around and headed towards the entrance of the walkway. The others followed behind him, quiet.

"Well, well. If it isn't the legendary idiots of King Johnny. I was wondering when I'd get to meet you." Nakamaru looked up, a chill going down his spine as the voice spoke.

"Nishikido Ryo," Jin breathed, and Nakamaru was suddenly acutely aware of Jin's body heat next to his.

Ryo grinned at them – a grin more of malice than anything else – Tegoshi was right next to him, smiling, but his was surprisingly kind. "Living and breathing. Which is more than what I can say for you guys."

~*~

Ueda thought it was the first time he'd seen Kame try not to cry in all the 3 years he’d known him, except he was pretty much failing at it.

Kame was a sight with his cheeks puffed out, his upper teeth biting into the corner of his bottom lip—quivering too—and his eyes so teary that Ueda was sure it'd just start leaking out. Kame sniffled loudly, one hand rubbing furiously at his nose and the other tightly fisted at his side.

"You 'kay?" Ueda asked, eyebrow raised, but he made no move to help the younger kid.

Kame sniffled loudly again, nodding gruffly. "Un. I'm fine," Kame managed to say without bursting into tears.

"Looks like someone's growing up," Ueda complimented, ruffling Kame's hair, a little more than impressed.

"I'm getting older, should stop being a baby," Kame said forcefully. Ueda raised his eyebrow higher.

"Where's this coming from?" Ueda asked, frowning. It wasn't like Kame to care about this sort of thing, Ueda knew. Kame only shook his head, his lips now pursed so thin that they were a line – the tears had seemingly gone away too; but while Ueda was impressed, he knew something else was up. "Are you being bullied by those kids again?" Ueda's eyes flared when he caught the look of fear in Kame's eyes before the little kid shook his head more furiously.

"No!" Kame protested, frowning. "I'm getting older! It's only right." He nodded at Ueda, as though to emphasize his point, except Ueda wasn't buying it.

Ueda huffed before spinning on his heel towards the door. "I'm gonna teach those kids," Ueda mumbled under his breath. Kame's hand yanked on his arm, pulling Ueda back.

"No!" Kame protested, more adamant. "Please don't do it, Ueda-kun. It's fine; it's fine." Kame insisted while Ueda could hear the blood rushing to his ears.

Ueda stopped in his tracks though, still staring at the door just a few feet away. Hoping that Kame would change his mind so that he could go out there and defend the little boy. "Please Ueda-kun," Kame begged, his hand tightly gripping the material of Ueda's shirt. Ueda could feel the younger boy shaking behind him and he hated how suddenly responsible he felt.

"You're sure?" Ueda said, his voice soft but stern.

"Un,” Kame said. His grip got slightly tighter, but Ueda didn't mind.

Instead, he turned around to face Kame, slipping easily out of the kid's grasp. "You'll come to me if you need help, right?"

Kame shook his head as he gave Ueda a watery smile. "There'll be a time when I'll be able to offer you a hand, Ueda-kun. That's what I want."

Ueda felt strangely proud of him.

~*~

A bolt of lightning shot out of the sky and flew towards Ryo and Tegoshi. The lightning hit a clear dome surrounding the two and spread throughout the dome, diffusing once it hit the ground. Tegoshi hadn’t even batted an eye.

Ryo smirked. "Nice try, fish lips. But you'll have to work a little harder than that."

Ueda glared, his staff tightly wrapped in his hand. "That wasn't even my worst," Ueda snapped, his pride a little hurt. Kame's hand gripped his shoulder, whether for security or for reassurance, neither knew.

"I'm sure it wasn't," Ryo mocked. By this point, everyone'd managed to pull out their staffs, holding them tightly to their sides, ready for anything that would happen. "Oh calm down," Ryo snapped. "I'm not going to kill you yet. That'd defeat the entire purpose of me getting you to the forest."

The six exchanged looks. "What's that supposed to mean?" Kame asked, confused.

"So King Johnny didn't tell you anything at all?" Ryo laughed. "Predictable. That old geezer only acts for himself anyway." He smirked again. "You six need to arrive at the forest in order to open it up—with the forest open, the one who is able to take control of the staff inside will have ultimate power."

"It's always ultimate power, isn't it?" Koki complained. "Why can't it be something wittier?" Ryo threw him a dirty look.

"Like unlimited beer," Jin sighed.

"Or world peace!" Taguchi chirped. They looked at him strangely.

"We'd be out of a job if that happened," Ueda said logically.

Nakamaru snorted, "That's what you think about?" Ueda shrugged.

A bolt of lightning hit the spot right between Nakamaru and Ueda, behind him. All eyes snapped back to Ryo and Tegoshi. "Thank you. I'm the one we should be concentrating on," Ryo snapped.

"You know," Jin started, "You're kinda short for a bad guy." The others stifled laughter as Ryo's face started to turn red. "I'd've expected the person who'd be threatening us and taking our lives would be a little taller. I mean..." Jin started to smile a little. "Even your little pet wizard over there seems to be a little taller."

"Ryo-tan's plenty tall!" Tegoshi said cheerfully. "Besides! His personality completely makes up for it!" Everyone snickered, hiding their amusement behind hands, leaving Ryo fuming.

"NEVER MIND THAT," Ryo hissed. "I'm here to issue a challenge. Be at the forest in a month, and the winner will get control of the forest."

Kame raised an eyebrow. "So all of us versus... Him?" he asked, pointing at Tegoshi.

Tegoshi tilted his head to the side, blinking innocently. A second later, a fireball skimmed past Kame's sleeve, setting it on fire. Kame quickly put it out.

"I'm taking that as a yes," Kame muttered.

Ryo smirked again. "You shouldn't underestimate Tegoshi-kun. He has more brains than you all put together and he's more powerful."

Tegoshi beamed brightly. "Ryo-tan, you're the best." Ryo ruffled the younger boy's hair.

"Anyway," Ryo said after he turned back, catching the end of all of KAT-TUN mock gagging. His eyes narrowed. "This is only a courtesy call. It won't happen again."

Ueda rolled his eyes. "Is this just your way of trying to scare us? Make us just bend to the might that is you and that puny wizard over there?"

Another bolt came flying down towards Ueda, but Ueda deflected it with his own, aiming it back at Tegoshi. Just when the lightning bolt hit the clear dome, another one shot down. Already unraveling from the energy drain of withstanding the first lightning bolt, the second bolt pushed through and hit the a spot a mere inch away from Tegoshi’s foot.

Ryo's eyes narrowed while Tegoshi looked thoughtfully at the spot. Ueda sneered, "I told you I hadn't used my full power."

"If you're done taunting us," Nakamaru said quietly – eyes meeting Ryo's. "I'm sure you have other towns that need taking over."

Ryo sneered. "At least you know now how strong we are. Just give us the ability to enter the forest and everything'll be fine." He turned to Tegoshi, before nodding slightly.

"Ah! Well, then!" Tegoshi waved cheerfully to the six. "Bye, bye, koneko-chan!" In a puff of smoke, the two disappeared, leaving KAT-TUN to stare with trepidation at the spot they'd been standing in.

"Taguchi!" Koki yelped when the male suddenly fell from his spot, clutching his chest tightly. "You still can't do things under pressure, can you?"

Taguchi gulped in as much air as he could. "I can!" he said with a shaky smile. "It's just a little more difficult."

Nakamaru exhaled. "We should find somewhere to stay to recover." His gaze fell on Ueda, who was pale and leaning against Kame for balance. "We're all a little shaky."

Ueda nodded, Kame pulling him forward in the direction of the town's inn.

Jin trailed behind, walking along with Koki and Taguchi. "The weird thing is," he said softly. "Ryo seemed like he was telling the truth." His eyes met Nakamaru's. "Are we being used?"

Nakamaru bit his lip. He didn't know the answer to that. And from the looks of the others, neither did they.

~*~

It wasn't long after Koki had arrived that his teacher brought in another student—a puny little kid with funny hair and even funnier teeth, but still a little adorable ...if you squinted the right way. Koki raised an eyebrow. "Kidnap another one?"

Tsuyoshi gave him a dirty look before pushing the kid forward. "This kid needed rescuing and it was up to me to do it."

"Is rescuing what they call it now?" Koki asked dryly.

The kid looked up at Koki with wide watery eyes and Koki thought that he might just crack under that gaze. "This is Tegoshi-kun," Tsuyoshi introduced, hugging the kid suddenly. "Isn't he cute? He has magic like you!"

Koki stared. "That puny kid? He doesn't even look like he can stand properly."

Tegoshi's eyes only got more watery and Koki thought that if the kid properly built up that "technique," he could use it for so much evil.

Tsuyoshi frowned at Koki. "Don't mind Koki-kun. He's still a little sore that I forbade him to do anything around the house."

Tegoshi looked at Tsuyoshi confused. "Why would he be sore about that?"

"Because he seems to have this idea in his head that the generous me would throw him out." Koki paled at Tsuyoshi's words.

"That's not it, idiot," Koki snapped. "I just wanna make sure I earn my keep."

Tsuyoshi leaned over to smack Koki over the head. "Don't insult your teacher. It's not proper." He turned to Tegoshi, "He's the kind of person you shouldn't be like."

"But he's really cool, Domoto-san! He says what he thinks. I never could."

Koki blinked down at the kid before grudgingly saying, "You're not half bad yourself, kid."

Tegoshi's eyes went wide. "Really?"

Koki flushed. "We'll see for sure at another time, huh? Stick around for a while."

"Un!" Tegoshi chirped, before reaching out and latching onto Koki's arm. "Can you show me around, Koki-kun? I want you to show me around."

Koki scratched the back of his head. "Sure, I don't see anything wrong with that."

Tsuyoshi smiled to himself as he watched the pair walk off. He knew it'd been a good idea to bring Tegoshi home from that horror of a home—the two may just save each other.

~*~

It'd been about two weeks after Ryo's "visit" and the group'd been making their way steadily towards the town Ryo was in. Through the entire journey there, Koki'd been racking his brain to remember anything he could about Tegoshi. "It'd help us figure out how we could defeat him," Ueda'd insisted.

Koki, however, couldn't remember for the life of him just how Tegoshi acted—past how he was always nice—and how their teacher adored the boy—hugging Tegoshi every chance he could get (Koki would kick him whenever he saw it, and then pull Tegoshi to safety – he was a great older brother). But for Tegoshi to turn bad? It was almost incomprehensible.

"I'm telling you," Koki insisted. "Tegoshi isn't a bad person. Not even close to one."

Nakamaru frowned. "Didn't kick puppies or anything?"

Koki stared aghast. "Tegoshi, kick puppies? Not possible."

"But then why is he on the bad side?" Jin whined. "Shouldn't he be on our side if he's such a good person?"

The table remained silent. "Isn't that the question of the day?" Ueda said dryly. "Plus we have to wonder about this King Johnny thing. Do we really open up this magical forest?"

"Won't we know when we get there?" Kame asked. The others looked at him weirdly before he continued. "I mean, if he needs us there to open it. He'll show up."

Murmurs of acknowledgment rose through the air. "So in other words," Nakamaru said. "We'll have to just get there and see how it plays out?"

Koki sighed, leaning against an elbow. "Sounds about right to me."

"Maa-maa," Taguchi chirped. "Will be all right!"

They gave him a weird look as he started humming some upbeat melody. "Either way," Ueda said, pulling their attention back to him. "We'll have to figure it out when we get there instead of earlier." All six got up, heading towards their rooms.

Jin whispered to Koki, "But really, Ryo's pretty short, isn't he?" Koki snickered, trying to hide his laughter behind his hand. "And he was really distracted by it. You think if we just kept insulting his height, we'd win?"

Koki cracked up, hitting Jin on the head. "You're an idiot, you know."

Jin stuck out his tongue. "You're just jealous I came up with a brilliant plan. I'll make sure to thank you in my speech." He sashayed forward; Koki watched amused. Still, he really wondered if things were going to be that easy.

It was two weeks later that they finally arrived at their destination, just under the time limit that Ryo had set for them.

They were met with Ryo and Tegoshi, both smiling in their own personal style. "Took you slowpokes long enough," Ryo snapped, arms crossed against his chest.

"Can't you let us rest for the night or something?" Ueda groaned loudly. "We've been walking for the past few hours."

"And not take advantage of when you're weak? I'm not stupid, thanks," Ryo retorted.

"Weren't you confident that your pet wizard could take us on even at our strongest?" Koki asked.

"Nice try. But I'm not that prideful," Ryo said, smirking. "I'll do whatever it takes to get what I want."

"You shouldn't on pick on those weaker than you, Nishikido," a booming voice said from behind the six. KAT-TUN could feel the dread welling in their stomachs as they turned around to come face to face with the person that'd made them come to the point they were at now.

"King Johnny!" Ryo exclaimed with a flourish, even bowing extravagantly to prove his point. "I was wondering when you'd show up. Come to claim the magic forest for yourself?"

King Johnny glared, then turned to the group. "Now you'll fulfill your purpose," he told them.

Everyone stared before Jin asked, "What's that exactly?"

"To help me become the most powerful man." His eyes gleamed as Ryo rolled his eyes. "The forest can only be opened at this very spot when you six arrive."

"We've been here for over 10 minutes," Nakamaru said dryly. "I see no such forest opening up." As though those were the magic words, the landscape around them started to shift. What once was a town was overtaken by trees and vines. The bright sunlight that'd been beaming down on them half disappeared as trees grew to their full potential.

All stood in awe. Then Ueda snapped, "You just had to open up your big mouth." Nakamaru shrugged helplessly.

~*~

Taguchi always woke up gasping for air—the sheets wrapped tightly around his body, constricting him. But he'd never yell, never cry for help. Just handled it all by himself.

"You're hiding something," Yokoyama complained during breakfast one morning.

"Sensei worries too much," Taguchi said good-naturedly, a smile on his face. Getting up, Taguchi moved around the table to pour his teacher another drink. "More, Sensei?"

Yokoyama grabbed Taguchi's wrist before he poured the liquid into his empty cup, his eyes serious—a look Taguchi wasn't used to seeing on his usually loud, outgoing teacher. "Are you still having nightmares?"

For a brief second, Taguchi could feel his defenses falter before he recovered and beamed at his teacher. "Sensei, you're too kind." With his teeth clenched, Taguchi managed to wrench his wrist out of his teacher's grip. "You really shouldn't worry,” Taguchi said, a little more reassuring as he poured some more alcohol into his teacher's cup

Yokoyama took a gulp of the drink, sighing. Taguchi moved back to his chair, taking a seat and smiling brightly at his teacher. "How much water is in a person's body?" he asked suddenly.

Taguchi blinked before thinking on it for a few minutes. "Depending on the person, around 45 to 75 percent."

"That's good; you've been reading," Yokoyama complimented, taking another swig of his drink.

"Well, Sensei," Taguchi half-laughed. "I had to book it when you threw the book at me!" Yokoyama only raised an eyebrow. "Anyway," Taguchi continued after the failed attempt at a joke, "I needed some type of reading material."

"Do you know why I haven't been teaching you much magic?" Yokoyama asked nonchalantly, playing with his spoon.

And again, despite his best efforts, because he didn’t want his teacher thinking any less of him, Taguchi faltered. But he did worry that maybe Yokoyama had made a mistake. He gathered his thoughts together and shook his head vigorously. "People move at their own pace! I thought you'd get around to it eventually,” Taguchi said, in a tone that made him almost believe his own words.

"Your power isn't always as tangible as others," Yokoyama told him. "You have power over water, remember that." Yokoyama took the last gulp of his drink before slamming the cup on the table, grinning cheekily at Taguchi. "Now, why don't we put this power to the test?"

Taguchi watched as his teacher got up and headed towards the door, his words still weighing heavily on Taguchi's mind. "Taguchi, get out here already!" Yokoyama complained from outside and Taguchi sighed as he slid out of his seat.

"Sensei, can we not conjure water over the town girls again? I'm pretty sure none of them like me anymore," Taguchi complained as he met his teacher at the door.

Yokoyama threw his arm over Taguchi's shoulders. "Nonsense! In the heat of summer, everyone wants to be cooled down by your water."

"It's the end of fall," Taguchi said grudgingly.

"Same difference."

~*~

It took a few minutes before both Johnny and Ryo started moving towards the center of the forest – the point from which all could see a bright light originating.

Tegoshi looked at the six, grinned, shrugged, and then followed after. KAT-TUN looked at each other, sighing a little—a groan here and there—before they followed too. Jin got there the fastest, using his winds to help him along; he arrived at the center even before Johnny and Ryo did, despite their lead. He created a wind barrier around the center, making sure no one could get through. The others came to a halt right behind Jin, Tegoshi standing beside them, looking thoughtful.

"Now," Jin said, growling a little. "The time for answers should've come when we started this damn thing. But since we didn't get it then, I'm asking now."

Ryo threw Johnny a smirk. "They're waiting, King Johnny."

"Nishikido, you're annoying," Johnny growled before he waved his hand towards Ryo – a gust of wind flew out and knocked Ryo into Kame who helped him back to his feet.

"You asshole!" Ryo hissed, starting to walk towards Johnny. Another gust of wind and suddenly the ring around Jin vanished. Jin's eyes went wide.

"I'm not as weak as you all think," Johnny snapped.

A stone suddenly shot out and hit Ryo on the head – he crumpled immediately to the ground. Tegoshi gasped loudly while KAT-TUN stared in a mixture of horror and helplessness. "He's okay!" Tegoshi exclaimed, relieved. He looked back, eyes blazing before Kame held out his hand to stop him.

"We'll take care of him," Kame assured him. Tegoshi nodded before another lightning bolt flew down from the sky, missing Johnny by an inch.

"Damn," Ueda cursed, before Johnny started moving. Jin was pushed out of the way by Johnny's wind, even though he'd tried to combat it with his own.

Tegoshi pulled back, shielding a prone Ryo. A dome appeared in the air around them as the others struggled to keep Johnny away from the center. But his own powers kept them away, stones flying towards them at the same time. And then all motion stopped.

Johnny grabbed the staff, holding it up in the air – everything becoming disturbed around them. "It's taken years to get to this point," he breathed. "Ever since I heard Oracle Koichi say that I needed six certain wizards to lead me to this point of ultimate power." He stared at him in awe.

Koki elbowed Nakamaru gently. "What is this, the obligatory bad guy speech?" he muttered. Nakamaru stifled a laugh.

Johnny leveled his glare on them. "And now, to eliminate the only obstacles in my path," Johnny said, making the ground under them shake.

In an instant, a combination of elements and noises exploded into the air. Accompanied by Nakamaru’s beatboxing, fires that both Nakamaru and Kame pulled together fell upon Johnny from above. Koki's rapping ("ore wa JOKER Dope na Rhyme de naki dasu jou chan machi ni matta kore ga ore no Show Time") disturbed the ground below them all as he tried to keep both Johnny's power away and attack him at the same time. Jin's winds surrounded Johnny's figure in the middle, trying to keep him in place. Taguchi's staff glowed blue as he lent his power to Ueda—helping out the only way he could, despite the shaky feeling gripping his entire body.

"Enough!" Ueda hissed, and all of them stopped suddenly and Ueda’s staff glowed a brighter yellow than they'd ever seen before.

They watched in horror as Ueda's lightning shot down from the sky and struck King Johnny's staff, electrocuting both it and Johnny before the staff exploded, unable to handle so many elements bombarding it in such a small span of time. Johnny's screams pierced their ears before the explosion knocked them off their feet. All, except Ryo, shielded their eyes from the bright light, before it dimmed, allowing them to get a good look at the empty spot in the middle. Not a single thing had been left behind and the forest around them was coming back down to a calm.

"Did we actually.... win?" Jin asked, stunned.

"How'd that even work?" Nakamaru stared at the spot in awe.

"Because we're the good guys!" Taguchi said as cheerfully as he could manage.

Koki snorted. "Maybe we shouldn't even bother questioning it. I don't think even Ueda knows how he did it."

Ueda groaned in his agreement as he slumped against his staff. Kame tried to help him up, his eyes tired. "Did we do what we were meant to?"

"Un!" Tegoshi said happily, sighing to himself before looking at the six. "Your goal's been done, for now anyways, I think."

KAT-TUN looked at him strangely, confused, but didn't press it. He got up, dusting himself off and pulling his staff close. "Are you... still going to work for Ryo?" Koki asked shakily, getting back onto his feet.

"Un! Ryo has been kind to me for years; I would never desert him. He has good intentions, you know." Tegoshi gave Ryo a sideways glance, smiling. "He just acts the way he does because it's what gets things done."

"Sure. Being a general ass always gets people to do what is needed," Ueda said dryly. Tegoshi only shrugged.

Kame moved forward, sticking out a hand. "I hope we won't ever have to fight, then."

Tegoshi took it pleasantly before pulling back. He waved cheerfully, yanking an unconscious Ryo closer to him. "Bye bye! Hope we'll meet again. In better terms, of course!" In another puff of smoke, he was gone. The others just stared at the empty spot before the crackling noise of flames caught their attention.

Belatedly, everyone noticed the burning forest, and whipped their heads towards Kame. "You had to use your strongest spell?" Koki asked, exasperated.

Kame frowned defensively. "We would've died if I hadn't!"

"Weren't we supposed to save the forest?" Nakamaru sighed, as he stared at the fire get worse and worse.

Kame crossed his arms. "I help save you guys and this is what I get in return?"

Koki snorted. "Don't you mean Ueda saved us?"

Jin stood off to the side, looking exhausted and obviously not wanting to fight anymore. Ueda gave Taguchi a look before the male smiled brightly, pulling out his staff. "Ireguchi, Deguchi, Taguchi desu!" he chimed before it glowed a bright blue and the entire forest was covered in a heavy rain, the flames extinguishing within seconds. The rain slowly turned into a drizzle.

The six stopped everything for a moment and just relished in the feel of water against their skin.

"What now?" Kame asked them, his voice strangely hollow.

"We're alive?" Koki said, slumping against his staff for balance.

"Right wrongs and fight evil?" Taguchi said helpfully.

"Go home and see the people we love," Nakamaru sighed.

"Sleep," Jin said. Everyone looked at him. "Sleep," he repeated. "Lots and lots of sleep."

Grins grew on their face as Ueda sighed, "That sounds good about now."

KAT-TUN nodded collectively before starting off. The direction didn’t matter. No goal in mind. No worry to panic about. Just them. Just like it should be.

("Does anyone even know how to get out of here?" Koki asked, an eyebrow raised.

Jin groaned. "Magical forest, my ass.")

THE END.

Quest for the Magic Forest Part One - KAT-TUN [PG]

Sat, 06 Jun 2009 16:22:28 GMT

Quest for the Magic Forest
tinyangl, 12,598 words
KAT-TUN, with appearances by Johnny, Yamapi, Ryo, Tegoshi, Takki, Tsuyoshi and Yokoyama. KAT-TUN is brought together by King Johnny in order to save the kingdom, but when complete strangers meet for the first time, it's bound to not be easy.
A/N: This... started out as a joke (it kind of still is XD). Something small I wrote after seeing KAT-TUN's Lips PV and couldn't get out of my head as being a fantasy story--mainly because fantasy is my favorite genre--and thanks to anamuan's prodding, I managed to turn it into full blown fic (originally all in comments, I might add) complete with villains and mocking jokes and utter stupidity. So please don't take this seriously at all. At all. I rarely, rarely write all of KAT-TUN in one go, so hopefully the OOC is not in full force. (OOC doesn't strictly apply to just KAT-TUN, by the by.) And I may be a little forceful at the beginning with the characterization, but I hope that doesn't turn anyone off. XD This has been over a year's project so I'm just glad to finally see it done.

Thanks so much to anamuan's work on this (and everyone she asked to help as well)--without you, dear, this never would have gotten made. ♥♥

"You-tachi. Only you have the power to save the kingdom." Jaws dropped and the room dipped into an awkward silence as King Johnny stared at each one in turn. “You are all exceptionally powerful in your fields.”

"Kamenashi Kazuya with the power of fire." Kame blinked before bowing to the king, a little startled.

"Akanishi Jin with wind."

"I do my best my work," Jin said solemnly, although the others stared at him a little strangely after that.

"Taguchi Junnosuke has the power of water under his command." They gave Taguchi a side glance as the male smiled brightly, bowing at the waist.

"Tanaka Koki with the power of earth." Koki looked around, sizing everyone up as though just their outward appearance determined how powerful they were.

"Ueda Tatsuya has lightning." Ueda just stood unwavering in his gaze.

"And Nakamaru Yuichi also with the power of fire." Nakamaru nodded as his stomach dropped at the idea that there were two with the power of fire—what was the point in that?

There was a small snicker off to the side. Jin looked at the faces that were gathered in the small throne room. "Ne, ne?" he started, calling their attention to him. "You know, if we put our initials together, we'd be KAT-TUN!"

Everyone blinked at him, confused.

"It's like we're a band," he said, a little more insistent now.

Everyone ignored him and turned their attention back to King Johnny who coughed loudly.

"You-tachi. Save the magic forest from going up in flames. Oracle Koichi foresaw the event and urged me to form this in order to prevent it." Johnny boomed from his throne, the crown crooked on top of his head.

They exchanged looks—none of them knew who the other was, much less what they could each do. Koki raised an eyebrow. "We're supposed to save this place? I don't even know these people."

"Well, that's what the journey's for! Getting to know each other and working together," Taguchi proclaimed. Nobody seemed to hear him.

Koki nudged Nakamaru, asking, "What can you do?"

Nakamaru pulled out his a staff—the top in the shape of a flower—and started beat boxing; the top of his staff started to glow an orange before a fire ball hit the spot right next to Koki's feet. He stopped, looking pleased with himself before Jin said, rather nonchalantly, "That takes a lot of time, doesn't it?"

"Is that really the extent of your powers?" Koki asked, giving him a pitying look.

"I'd like to see you do better," Nakamaru retorted.

Koki grinned, pulling out a staff identical to Nakamaru's. "Ore wa Joker," he hissed before the top glowed a green and the ground underneath them started to shake for a few seconds before stopping abruptly.

"Nononono," Jin said excitedly before pulling out his own staff. "Mine's good too!" Everyone watched as he did some obscene movement with his tongue, the top of his staff glowing a darker silver than it already was. Suddenly, the wind inside the room picked up and in front of them a small tornado whirled before disintegrating into dust just as quickly as it formed.

Kame snorted beside him making Jin throw him a dirty look. Without saying a single word, he pulled out his staff and screeched loudly into it, the rest of them covering their ears to avoid hearing it. The staff glowed a more intense red than it had for Nakamaru before fire started to rain from the ceiling. He suddenly stopped; they blinked blankly at him.

"You win," Koki murmured. Taguchi nodded vigorously beside him. Kame grinned in turn, until suddenly a bolt of lightning struck a foot away from him. Instantly Kame jumped, knocking into Jin in his surprise.

A bright yellow glow on Ueda's staff told them the source and it dimmed seconds later. Ueda looked at them quietly, a small smile on his lips, while Kame rolled his eyes.

"Or not," Nakamaru said, blinking at him.

Jin stared. "You didn't even do anything!"

Ueda answered serenely, "The fairies helped me."

Only Kame snorted.

~*~

"THIS CHILD HAS MAGIC," the teacher exclaimed excitedly as he waved his staff around Jin's head. "I can sense the power in this one."

Jin's mom exchanged a look with Jin before turning incredulously, "You're serious?" She looked down again at her child. "Do you... feel like you have magic?"

Jin blinked widely, his hand wrapped tightly around her pointer finger before asking "If I say yes, does that mean I'll definitely have magic?"

The wizard blinked. "I-"

"Only if you want to."Jin's mom interrupted.

"Do I get to have a staff like that?" Jin asked, more excited this time.

"Of course!"

"Then yes!"

The wizard stared. "It doesn't work like that."

Jin's mom threw him a dirty look before crouching down to her child's eye level. "Now remember. Never use your powers for evil. And listen to your elders, but only if what they say makes sense."

Jin beamed brightly. "UN!"

~*~

Jin was sure the others thought less and less of him as they continued on their journey. Every time he opened his mouth, they'd throw him funny looks and Kame had even taken to calling him "Bakanishi" more often than not. (He knew he shouldn't have told them that story with Pi and something with variables and stuff, but it had been so quiet and Jin hated silences.)

And they were still being annoyingly quiet—Journeys were supposed to be fun! And exciting! Not strained and awkward.

"So guys!" Jin started, trying to get at least one conversation off the ground. They all gave him bored looks though, which almost made him want to give up. "What do you think we're going to get as a reward for all this? I mean, King Johnny said we'd definitely be given something for all our work." He beamed brightly. "I hope it involves food. And alcohol. And maybe women."

Kame threw him a dirty look. "The faith of the kingdom rests in our hands and you're wondering what we're getting as a reward? Where's your loyalty?"

Jin frowned, a little wounded. "Hey, I'm completely loyal! I'm here, aren't I?" He stopped in his tracks, the rest of them halting as well. A furrow settled between his eyebrows.

Nakamaru put his hand on Jin's shoulder, trying to sooth him with the action, but Jin shrugged it off.

"I could be back home, trying to make sure that Pi doesn't burn down his restaurant," Jin snapped, suddenly wishing his best friend was here.

"Pi. Pi. Pi," Koki hissed. "That's all you ever talk about."

Nakamaru's eyes went wide as he shook his head vigorously. "Come on, guys," he started. "Let's not fight."

Nobody heard him.

"He's what I know," Jin exclaimed. "I grew up with him. Is that so wrong?!"

"I grew up with Ueda, but you don't see me harping on and on about him!" Kame snapped.

"That's because he's here!" Jin shouted. "He's here." Jin’s voice tattered at the edges and Jin couldn’t find it in him to continue the words; his fists clenched at his sides.

There was a long silence before Taguchi moved, slinging an arm around Jin's shoulder and pulling him close. "We're all scared," he mused softly. "But we can rely on each other. Just you wait, Akanishi-kun."

Everyone stared - Kame and Ueda exchanged glances and the anger in Koki's face quickly died down as they watched Jin duck his head down, hands furiously rubbing against his face.

"Let's keep going,” Nakamaru sighed. “At the next town, we should find an inn. I think we need some rest." They all nodded and one by one, they started walking—Jin still pressed against Taguchi’s side.

"I still think you're an idiot," Jin mumbled to Taguchi.

Taguchi smiled. "Whatever gets you through the day."

Up ahead, Kame slowed his pace, now only a few feet away from Jin and Taguchi. He tilted his head back just enough so that the other two could see him properly. "Sorry," he muttered embarrassed, before moving back up to join Ueda at the front.

Jin stared. "That happened, right? I didn't imagine it?"

Taguchi nodded, his smile wider. "Un! See, Akanishi-kun! It's already starting!"

~*~

Nakamaru's parents looked from the wizard to their son. "This one? Are you sure it's not one of our daughters?"

Nakamaru nodded along with them, no pains in admitting that he didn't think he was one to have magic like this wizard said he did.

The wizard, for his part, looked irritated rather than enthusiastic, which had been his demeanor only 5 seconds ago. "Yes. I'm positivee. This one has the power of fire. Your daughters, as great as I'm sure you think them, have no such sign."

Nakamaru's father looked warily. "But he's so..." Nakamaru blinked innocently at his dad, his hand clutching tightly to the leg of his dad's pants. "Normal," his father sighed before leaning down to scoop Nakamaru into his arms. "It's not a bad thing."

The wizard frowned. "Just because you can't see it, doesn't mean it's not there." He stared eye to eye with the child Nakamaru. "You're meant for great things."

Nakamaru blinked. "Really?" A small smile started to grow on his face.

"Normal won't ever be the word to describe you," the wizard assured him.

Nakamaru could feel his father's grip around him tightening, but his awe overtook every other sensation. "What do I have to do?" Nakamaru asked, his voice a mixture of shy and curious. The wizard smiled.

~*~

Nakamaru thought the idea of crashing at the nearest town was the best they'd had so far. The strain between all of them had been getting too hard to handle and Nakamaru didn't know how he could fix it. When they reached the inn, they split into pairs—Kame with Ueda (predictably), Jin and Taguchi—which left Nakamaru with Koki.

Honestly, he didn't mind any of them: they seemed like nice people in their own right and all seemed to have a reason to be there. Some, though, took longer to warm up to than others. And Koki was one of them.

After Jin's explosion at the side of the road, Koki had been edgy the rest of the trek—refusing to talk to anyone, walking a small distance away from the group like he was never a part of it to begin with. And Nakamaru did try (as did Kame and Ueda and even Taguchi; Jin, however, pointedly ignored Koki), but nothing worked.

In the inn, Nakamaru crashed on top of his bed, suddenly feeling exhausted. Any thoughts and worries about the dynamics of their group and whether they would be able to do as they were asked were erased from his mind. Within seconds, he fell fast asleep.

When Nakamaru woke, the sunlight that he'd fallen asleep to had disappeared, replaced by the florescent glow of dim street lamps. Moaning, he stretched a little—feeling sorer than he was used to—and looked around the room, the light from the candle on the side table burning steadily. He supposed Koki must've lit it, except there was no sign of Koki actually in the room. Taking the candle’s stand, he moved outside of the room, trying to find his roommate.

Outside the room was a staircase leading down to the local tavern which was still filled with people—no matter the late hour Nakamaru supposed it was. Nakamaru was easily able to find Koki who was sitting down at a table along with Ueda and Kame—drinks in front of them. They seemed to be having a good conversation which brought a smile to Nakamaru's face.

He moved down the stairs, thinking he could join them when he heard his name being passed around between them. Nakamaru froze midstep, heedless as people knocked into his shoulders as they passed.

"Nakamaru's the weakest of us all!" Koki slurred. "Why would they ever choose him to be part of our group?"

Ueda faintly nodded. "It does take longer for his powers to actually show up too. He has to go through that... noise thing he does." He took a sip of whatever drink he had in front of him, looking dainty in his motions.

"You never know. Maybe he's hiding something that he has yet to demonstrate," Kame pointed out.

Koki snorted. "He seems too normal for that."

Nobody seemed to see him. Nakamaru could feel his stomach plummeting. The word echoed in his head—"normal." No matter what his teacher said—he would be stuck with that one word. Nakamaru didn't know how long he stood there until scalding hot wax spilled over the stand and onto his hand. He yelped, ignoring all sense of anything else as he blew on his hand (and the candle out) in one go.

It felt like the place had plunged into silence as Nakamaru shakily looked up, meeting Kame's eyes first of the three. The other two turned to look at Nakamaru silent—Koki’s eyes were blank. Nakamaru awkwardly laughed, "Sorry. Sorry. Just some candle wax. Don't let me bother you."

Kame started to stand up, but Nakamaru shook his head, stepping backwards with a plastered smile. He gestured for Kame to stay, and he hoped the look on his face was enough to say that he was fine. When Kame sat back down, Nakamaru figured his message was received and so, he turned to go back to his room, catching sight of Jin and Taguchi right behind him.

Jin’s face was pitying when Nakamaru reached the top step. "What?" Nakamaru said shakily. "I'm fine. Normal Maru. I'm used to it."

An arm comfortably rested itself over his shoulders and Nakamaru looked up at Taguchi. Another one snaked around his waist—Jin—and Nakamaru relaxed into their arms. "Come on, then, Normal Maru. You're staying in our room tonight and showing us how you'd normally lose a poker game," Jin joked.

Nakamaru snorted. "I can show you how I normally kick people's asses." He allowed himself to be led into Jin and Taguchi's room – relaxing into the soft banter.

They'd become a cohesive group at some point, Nakamaru thought—tonight, though, was not the right time.

~*~

Ueda stared at the scrawny kid next to the wizard. "Who's that, master?" Ueda asked, one eyebrow raised—a weird look on any kid.

The wizard sighed as Kame's hold on her leg tightened and he looked about ready to burst into tears. "Ueda-kun, I told you before not to call me master. It's not like I'm your boxing teacher." She grabbed Kame by the cuff of his shirt, effectively yanking him away from her leg. "And you. You need to stop shying away from people. Ueda-kun won't bite."

Ueda tried to grin; it was shaky at best. The wizard sighed.

"You'll be learning magic together, so I'd like it if you could get along," she said, pushing Kame towards Ueda. "Now shake hands."

Kame slowly stuck his hand out, which Ueda took squeezing. Tears quickly started to form in Kame's eyes as he tried to pull his hand away from Ueda's grip. When he finally managed to, Ueda looked thoughtful.

"Maybe you should take up boxing with me. It'll make you stronger and not as scrawny," Ueda suggested helpfully, with a little wrinkle of his nose as he looked over the younger kid. Kame appeared like he was about to burst into a fresh stream of tears.

The wizard moaned as she thought of all the work she was going to have to go through.

~*~

"You know they hate you, right?" Ueda said nonchalantly as he paged through a book. It had been about two weeks since Nakamaru had overheard their conversation and it seemed strained between those three and the remaining three. Koki couldn't remember a thing of what he'd said, and while he was confused as to what had happened—knowing he’d said/done something wrong—he kept to himself. After that, any thing Kame said seemed to bring conversations to a complete halt while Ueda slowly became friendly with the other three.

"No," Kame snapped as he eyed Ueda from under his arm. "I had no idea. Tell me more about how I'm the most hated member of the group."

Ueda shrugged. "I just thought you should know in case you were under the delusion that people actually like you."

"Ugh," Kame groaned. "Weren't you the asshole when we were kids? When'd it change?"

Ueda snorted. "I obviously taught you too well." He removed his glasses and shrugged. "You do realize you're going to have to fix this."

Kame sat up, his hands in between his legs at the edge of his bed. "At least I'm not the only one," he said childishly. "Koki's disliked as much as I am."

Ueda shrugged again. "It's not a competition, you know."

"I know," Kame sighed. "I'll try doing something about it in the morning."

The next morning, all six boys met up in front of the inn—ready for the next leg in their journey—and again, they unintentionally split into three. Nakamaru, Jin and Taguchi joked around on one side of the road while Kame and Ueda walked alongside them and Koki trailed behind them all quietly.

Ueda elbowed Kame. "Didn't you say you were going to fix it?"

Kame looked at the three warily. "I said I'd try."

"I don't even see that effort," Ueda retorted.

Nearby, the three burst into a sudden fit of laughter, Jin leaning on Taguchi for balance as Nakamaru repeated, "Right?! Right?!" Taguchi nodded vigorously in agreement.

Kame lurched. "Must I? Can't we do this another time? They look..."

"Friendly?" Ueda supplied.

"Occupied," Kame gritted through his teeth.

"So? Just join in."

Kame pouted. "Only if you come with me."

"You are still such a clingy baby." Ueda rolled his eyes.

"At least I don't cry at the drop of a hat anymore."

"Except you did. Like three weeks ago."

"It was my favorite hat! It fell into manure. There was no way I could use it again," Kame sighed, hand moving to tug his hat down tighter.

Ueda snorted before yanking Kame over to the other three. "Hey," he said, startling the others with his sudden appearance.

"Uh. Hey," Jin greeted, one eyebrow raised. "What's going on?"

Ueda pushed Kame in front of him. "This one wants to not be hated."

The three exchanged looks before bursting into laughter. "Who hates you?" Taguchi asked, smiling brightly at Kame—to the point that Kame thought every single hurt, insecurity, worry was being melted away.

Kame blinked at them widely. "I.. None of you wanted to talk to me. I mean." Kame could feel himself shaking a little as he fidgeted with his newest hat. "You were okay with Ueda. But whenever I entered, you'd get so... awkward."

Nakamaru snorted. "Are you sure you weren't just reading into things? None of us minded you."

Jin even smiled at him. "If you're still worried about that fight from long ago, it's been forgiven and forgotten."

Kame stared at them, feeling all his emotions well up inside. He resisted from bursting into tears, although as he rubbed at his eyes, it was getting harder and harder to.

"What were you saying about growing up from being a crybaby?" Ueda groaned.

"Shut up," Kame hiccuped as he tried to hide his urge to cry more.

Nakamaru smiled at Kame. "Don't cry too much. You may ruin all that eyeliner."

"Shame," Ueda snorted.

Kame made a face at him before leaning against Ueda's shoulder, trying to muffle the tears that he'd given up hiding.

Ueda patted him on the back, sighing. "Okay then, if you must cry. Go ahead. But you're getting these clothes washed. I'm not going to have black streaks on them when we face our big bad. How embarrassing."

The other three burst into laughter, Kame joining in. None seemed to notice the dejected Koki only a few feet away.

~*~

Koki thought the old man in front of him was obviously off his rocker. "Look, old man," the already near-teenage Koki snapped as he turned the brim of his hat to the side. "I don't know what game you're playing, but I don't do that kind of crap."

The wizard stared for a few moments before launching himself at Koki, hugging him tightly. "Oh, you poor, poor child! Trying to be strong when you're obviously broken inside."

Koki struggled out of the guy's grip. "Are you joking me? I ain't broken one bit. So get your grimy cracker hands off me."

The wizard refused to release Koki and instead sighed loudly. "I'll take care of you. Teach you the magic I know you possess. Make life easier for you unfortunate soul."

"Yeah, magic," Koki scoffed, finally able to pry the wizard's tight grip off his shoulders. "If that were true, I could've done something for my family. But I couldn't and can't. So I don't have magic."

The wizard frowned. "But you do. You have immense power that must be controlled. And only I can help you." His eyes watered quickly though. "And give you the life you deserve, instead of spending it on the streets."

Koki gave him a dry look. "There's no way I'm going anywhere near you. Who knows what you'll do to me." He snorted. "Now. I'm leaving. Don't follow." He turned on his heel and promptly fainted, the wizard catching his slack body easily.

"I should've known you'd be a challenge," the man said, sighing. "But it's okay, Tanaka-kun. You'll learn better." He slung the boy’s body over his shoulder and headed towards his home, whistling all the way.

(Koki woke up screaming the next morning. "WHAT IS THIS CRAP?!" he yelled, looking up from his clothes as the wizard came running into his room.

The wizard sighed. "It's much more befitting of a lad such as yourself. Street clothes are not what wizards wear."

Koki stared, "And PAINTER CLOTHES are?!"

The wizard sighed again. "Oh, the youth of today. So corrupted.")

~*~

Koki wasn't sure anymore why he was there. He'd been brought up with a purpose: to save others, to save the people he cared about, to save himself. But he couldn't really do that when nobody liked him, wanted him, trusted him.

It hurt when he was able to watch the rest of them get along with each other. "KAT-TUN"—that's what Jin had called them when they'd first met—Koki was sure they didn't really need that second T. So he planned—planned his leaving. Planned how it would go. Planned the letter he'd leave behind.

They were all just plans though—Koki didn’t think he had the courage to leave the group. Especially when he knew what was at stake.

But being alone made everything so much more painful. And he wondered sometimes if they were just taunting him—dangling a prize in front of him that he could never get. It was like being a kid again—alone and starving for attention. And he hated it.

Koki stared at the five in front of him who were, again, joking about something or other. It'd been about a week and a half since Ueda and Kame had become buddy-buddy with the other three. Three weeks and a half since Koki had stopped talking to any of them.

He was beginning to get sick of the sound of his own voice.

Koki stopped suddenly in his tracks. Apparently the others had gotten used to the sound of him dragging his feet behind them because they all stopped and turned to face him. There wasn't malice in their eyes, nor was there caring. Just a spot in between. Koki couldn't decide which was worse—indifference or one of the extremes.

"I'm leaving," Koki blurted out. Inwardly, he flinched – his teacher would kill him for stopping something halfway. For letting any work (as little as they'd done) go to waste.

Nobody seemed to be able to talk—all stunned by his words.

Koki felt the need to continue. "I don't have a point in staying here. All of you could care less if I was here or if I wasn't. So why waste my time? I could be doing something more productive."

Nakamaru was the first to talk. "It's not like you made any effort," he said softly.

"Why try something when I know it'll fail?"

"Has that always been your motto?" Jin asked sourly. "You must not do anything new in life."

Koki threw him a dirty look. "If I'm good at something and I know I'm good at it, what's wrong with only doing that?"

"So how'd you learn magic?" Ueda asked plainly. "I doubt you were confident from the start that you could do it. Nobody could be or would be."

A beat. "Exactly," Ueda continued. "You're just afraid of being hurt. Getting close to people because you don't want them to ever leave."

Koki's heart clenched at the thought. "Shut up," he muttered. "That's not it."

"Fear can do a lot of things," Ueda continued—the others stared at him as he spoke, silent. "It can either help you move forward or keep you back. It's up to you to decide which."

Koki swallowed. "I don't have any such fear," he insisted shakily.

The group plunged into silence—like a standoff—before both Kame and Taguchi moved forward. Each with a hand stretched out.

"We'll try not to hurt you," Kame said softly. "We don't know each other well, but we're trying."

Taguchi smiled. "You should try too."

Koki swung the brim of his hat over his face, tugging it down to cover his eyes as he took the hands in front of him. "I'm holding you to this, you know." Koki muttered darkly.

Nakamaru moved to stand behind him—any previous anger that Koki'd been afraid of no longer evident as he slung his arm around Koki's shoulders. "We'll make sure that we hold true to it. And don't worry. We won't make fun of your crying. It's not as funny as when Kame does it."

"Hey!"

Jin chortled. "Who wants to make him cry again?" A chorus of "me"s went up as Kame looked around horrified.

"Traitors!" he hissed.

Jin only grinned cheekily before reaching out to pluck Kame's hat off his head, and instantly ran down the road, waving it in the air.

"NO, NOT THE HAT!" Kame cried as he dashed after Jin. "I just broke that in!"

Koki laughed hard, trying to wipe away the small drops of tears in his eyes. He'd forgotten how good it felt to laugh.

"See," Nakamaru whispered. "It's not that difficult."

Koki wanted to argue that it was that difficult, but he was just too tired to argue anymore—especially on something so senseless. "Yeah," he said instead. "I guess you're right."

Ueda threw him an amused look, and Taguchi wouldn't stop grinning. Koki was just glad he finally belonged.

~*~

Taguchi thought that the man in front of him was too young to be trusted. But he kept a smile on his face, nodding politely as the man talked on and on about how he definitely knew magic, and why anyone doubted him, he had no idea. "Aa..." Taguchi started when finally the stranger took a breath.

But it didn't last as the man went into another rant about how some people had no idea what they were talking about and how he really wished he could stick his staff up a place most people didn't like things like that to be.

Taguchi blinked innocently, confused.

The man waved his hand in the air, dismissing his own comment. He called out to the barmaid for another drink, which Taguchi got up to grab for the man - placing it onto the table in front of the man before settling back into the seat in front of him. He leaned on an elbow, looking curiously at the man.

"Why are you here, mister?" Taguchi asked, tilting his head to the side.

The man took a chug of his beer, before slamming the glass against the table. "I came here to get you!" He grinned toothily at Taguchi who blinked again, confused.

"Why?" The barmaid asked as she came to stand behind her son, cautiously.

"He has magic obviously," the wizard snorted. "You're missing out on a good thing if that boy doesn't get trained."

She eyed him warily. "I don't trust you."

"I get that a lot," he snapped. "But it doesn't make what I say untrue. And I know what I'm talking about. That boy has magic and I'm teaching him."

Taguchi swung his legs underneath the chair. "Sure!" he chirped.

His mom looked at him cautiously. "Are you sure?"

Taguchi grinned, tilting a head to the side. "What's the worse that can happen?"

The wizard grinned back. "That's the right attitude," he said before downing the rest of his drink. "Another please."

~*~

Taguchi was the most excited when they'd come to the next town. "It's my home town!" he told them as they were coming up to it.

Jin sighed, exhausted. "Taguchi. You've said that about 10 times in the last FIVE MINUTES."

"That means twice in one minute. Once every half a minute. I think we've all gotten that fact ingrained in our head," Ueda said dryly.

Taguchi bounced from one foot to the next. "I know. I know! But I haven't seen my mom since I left home. And I hope she's still healthy and the bar's still up and nothing bad's happened!"

Koki snorted. "You lived in a bar when you were young? Doesn't that explain a lot."

Nakamaru laughed as Taguchi looked at Koki in confusion. "What's that supposed to mean?" he asked.

"Nothing, nothing." Koki said, waving his hand at Taguchi. "Are we almost there at least?"

"Un!" Taguchi chimed. "We'll be able to stay at the inn there so we won't have to pay at least in one town."

"Thankfully," Kame sighed. "That last job didn't get us as much money as it should've."

Jin snorted. "Probably because all we had to do was ensure that the client's dog go to the next town safely. It was just its master being lazy to the point that she couldn't even bring her puppy back to her sister." Jin shook his head. "I thought we were powerful wizards and that's one of our assignments."

"We'll take what we can get." Nakamaru shrugged. "Better than no money at all. Especially with the amount of towns we're passing through to find this forest."

"And this map doesn't help us at all," Ueda sighed as he rolled their poorly drawn map back into his bag. "X does not mark the spot."

"You'd think a forest would be noticeable," Kame mumbled as he fiddled with his hat in his hands.

Jin cheerfully supplied, "It wouldn't be a magic forest if it was easy to find."

"Oh, oh!" Taguchi exclaimed happily, cutting into the conversation. "We're here!" The group stopped in the entrance of this town and stared at the empty town, not one person on the streets. Jin blinked. "Come on! I'll show you my family's bar!" Taguchi dashed forward, ignoring the sudden feeling of dread as the others rushed to catch up with him.

"Come on, Taguchi! Not so fast!" Koki yelled out. The others followed behind him, watching Taguchi's back until he came to a fast halt, standing in front of a broken down tavern—just like the ones they were used to. A frown was set on Taguchi's lips, a sight that the others weren't used to and they remained silent as they slowly walked through the swinging wooden door.

Inside, they heard a loud crash, shattering of glass bottles and raised voices. "You owe us money, barmaid," a loud voice yelled.

A body slammed against a door. "Get your hands off me!" a distinctly feminine voice yelled. Everyone turned to look at Taguchi, who'd turned pale, his jaw hanging open and his entire body frozen. People started to walk out of the hallway that connected the tavern to the supplies in the back.

"Hey, kids," an old man said when he saw them. "Sorry, some official business. You know how it is."

Ueda looked at him coolly before a bolt of lightning hit the floor right next to his foot, only missing the man by an inch. "Ah," he mused. "I missed."

The man stared—as did the other 8 guys who filed out of the hallway. A female came out seconds later, moving to the other side of the thugs before gasping, "Junno?"

The men turned to look at her. "As in that kid of hers?" one of the men said, panicked. "Didn't he get taken by some wizard?"

"You mean he didn't die?!" another yelped as KA-TUN pulled out their staffs; Taguchi, however, was having trouble breathing; his eyes widened in horror as he slowly backed up.

"Taguchi?" Nakamaru asked, worry in his voice. But at that moment, the thugs started to move – whether to attack or to escape didn't matter, because Jin quickly rounded them together with a circle of winds, keeping them all in the same spot.

"Ore wa joker. Dope na rhyme de nakidasu jyouchan." The ground shook underneath them before the floorboards broke under the thugs' feet, the 9 men sinking into the ground before it all stopped: the wind and the shaking and the screaming. Except Jin kept a thin wind binding the men at the middle – making sure that no man could get free.

"Now," Nakamaru said as pleasantly as he could. "You won't be bothering this establishment any further, right?"

The man he'd been talking to struggled to get out of the wind binds, and when he realized he couldn't, he spat in Nakamaru's face.

The others grimaced as Nakamaru turned to look at them, wiping away the spit with a sleeve. "Next time," he grumbled, "Kame's doing this job."

"But you're the nice one, Nakamaru!" Kame said cheekily. Nakamaru made a face at Kame, which he returned with one of his own.

Nakamaru turned around again, snapping his fingers—a small puff of a fireball hovered above his fingertips. "Now. I'll say it again." He brought the fireball closer to the man's face, the flames hot and crackling over his nose. "You won't be coming here again, right?"

"I know Kame said he's the nice one," Jin supplied helpfully, "but Nakamaru‘s got a temper."

Nakamaru frowned. "No, I don't."

"It's called bluffing," Jin huffed. "No wonder you lose at poker so much."

Beat. Shaking his head, Nakamaru brought the fire a little closer. "I didn't hear a response yet, did you?" he asked his friends.

"Nope!" Koki cheerfully replied. The man whimpered, and the others who could see stared in a mixture of horror and awe.

"Let me threaten them," Ueda asked.

"You'd kill them," Nakamaru snorted.

"Exactly." Ueda's eyes narrowed at the men, his arms crossed. The man's eyebrows shot up even higher than before.

"W-we'll s-stop! Just let us go!" the man pleaded.

Nakamaru smiled before snapping his fingers again. "Then you can go." Koki let the earth open back up, and the members moved to the side to let them pass. At the men's heels, Ueda let out tiny sparks of electricity that sent them stumbling forward, pushing each other out the door with yelps. Kame snorted, shoving Ueda whose response was only a pleased smile.

Then they focused their attention on the still frozen Taguchi, who was being cared to by his mother. "Junno. Junno," she called. "It's fine. We're safe."

Taguchi's eyes slowly came back into focus. He stared at them before taking a deep breath, plastering on a smile. "Sorry. Sorry. I... That was just really familiar. I'm... I'm going to go rest now." Before anyone could say a word, Taguchi made his way upstairs and into a room, the door shutting loudly behind him.

His mom winced before facing the members. "Thanks for rescuing my bar," she said, bowing at them.

Nakamaru shook his head, "It's no problem. But..."

"What just happened?"

They all nodded.

"The same thing happened years ago, only last time...Last time, my husband and Junno’s brother lost their lives trying to protect us. Junno was too young back then, and it seems...he's never gotten over it," she sighed again. "He can't handle pressure, but I'd hoped slightly that this magic thing would help somehow."

Ueda paused. "But he always seems to do fine."

His mom shrugged. "Maybe. But if you could help fix things with him, I'd—I’d like that. He needs his mind freed from this burden."

They exchanged looks before nodding—Taguchi'd been strong for them; they could do the same for him.

~*~

It turned out that Jin wasn't his teacher's only student. When he arrived at the house, he found another boy peeking at him from around the corner, looking younger than he was, smaller than he was, annoyingly prettier than he was. Jin stared from the doorway, blinking in confusion as the young kid moved to face him, sticking a hand out.

"Hi! I'm Yamashita~" he greeted cheerfully.

Jin could only stare at the hand—were there that many kids with magic out there? He thought he'd been at least a little special. The wizard coughed discretely before Jin finally realized he was supposed to shake the hand, which he did a second later.

Yamashita never noticed the pause, though, and took his hand happily. "So, is Takizawa-san going to be teaching you? What power do you have? I've never actually seen magic!"

Jin blinked before angling his head to look up at his teacher, who smiled gently down at him.

"This is Yamapi," Takki explained, "A kid from the neighborhood. He comes here a lot, so you'll be seeing him often."

"Un!" Yamapi supplied. "Takizawa-san is really cool! I wanna be just like him when I grow up!" He looked thoughtful for a second before continuing, "But I don't have magic, so that may be hard."

Jin suddenly found his voice. "You don't have magic?"

"Nope! But that's okay," Yamapi chirped. "I have other things I can do!" He held out his hand to Jin again. "Come on! Let me show you around!"

Jin stared at Yamapi’s hand for a moment before taking hold of it. The young boy beamed before yanking him down some hallway.

"This is gonna be so much fun!" Yamapi exclaimed happily.

Jin thought that sounded about right.

~*~

Nobody said anything related to the incident to Taguchi, around Taguchi, anywhere five feet away. For his part, Taguchi acted normally after the incident, reverting back to the smiling, cheerful and sometimes overly excited Taguchi that they knew all too well. The others tried their best to be normal, but all they could think of was Taguchi's mom's words. It proved to be more difficult when they ended up staying in his hometown for over a week—to make sure that nothing else would happen to his mom and the bar. At the end of the week, they found out that the guys who'd been demanding money had skipped town with their tails between their legs.

Soon after, the group prepared to move to the next town – as shown to them by the map.

("How the hell do new places keep popping up?" Nakamaru complained.

"It's a magical map," Jin explained. "You do not question it."

Nakamaru only rolled his eyes.)

This time, Jin had been the excited one, since it was where he was taught that was next. And as everyone knew, it also meant meeting the mysterious "Pi" that he'd been talking about.

"Pi's really dumb," Jin started. "But he can cook. He made this one dessert that looked like it was made of whipped cream, but it wasn’t, because Pi doesn't like whipped cream. And it ended up tasting like the best dessert ever. He called it the Whipped Cream."

They all made a funny face.

"I told you he wasn't smart," Jin said, responding to their looks.

Koki snorted. "Compared to you, I'm surprised there's someone worse." The members didn't even bother hiding their snickers.

Jin stuck his tongue out, prompting Koki to do the same, only better. Jin clucked his tongue before plunging into another discussion of his town. The members groaned loudly.

Once they reached their destination, the first thing Jin did was promptly drag everyone towards one of the larger buildings in the center of town. Throwing open the doors, Jin announced, "Beans has returned!"

The entire restaurant stopped what they were doing, all heads turning in his direction before a noise rose up, louder than anything they'd ever known—a combination of whoops and yells, in addition to some groans.

A head with a wide grin on its face poked out of the kitchen, and the other members were surprised to find the person looked younger than Jin.

"Bakanishi!" Yamapi exclaimed, unmistakably happy, before the two rushed towards each other. They hugged tightly before separating and doing some complicated handshake, ending with hands in the shape of half hearts pounded against their chests.

"Oh God," Koki breathed, blinking at the sight of Jin babbling happily with his friend.

"Un," Kame echoed, a twitch developing in his left eye.

"He's never going to shut up now," Ueda groaned, head in hand.

Taguchi awwed. "Let him be happy. It's been a while since he's seen him, right?"

When the other members glared at him darkly, Taguchi held his hands up in mock surrender.

"Guys!" Jin called out, turning all their attention back to him. "This is Pi! Or Yamapi as he's also known. Or Yamashita-kun if it's that girl behind the counter," Jin added with a wrinkle of his nose.

Yamapi elbowed Jin sharply. "Don't be stupid." He bowed to the others, "Nice to meet you. I hope this idiot hasn't been pulling your group down or anything."

"Ah!" Kame started when nobody said anything. "He's been an integral part of our mission." There were a few snickers behind him, but Kame fought to keep a straight face.

Yamapi only laughed. "If you say so. You'll all be staying here tonight. There are some empty rooms upstairs—Jin can lead you there." He gave Jin a snide glance. "If he doesn't get lost on the way."

Jin stuck his tongue out. "I am amazing and wizardly. It is just up a flight of stairs. Not very hard to get lost, thanks."

Yamapi laughed again, making his way back to the kitchen. "And yet you found yourself inside a broom closet, crying about how you had suddenly gotten dragged into the depths of hell."

Jin flushed as the five next to him burst out laughing. "That was when we were 17. It was the first time I'd gotten drunk. And you were the one feeding me those thoughts!"

"My mistake!" Yamapi called out from the kitchen.

Jin made a face, even though Yamapi wouldn't be able to see it, Then, he pulled the others in the directions of their rooms.

That evening, Yamapi pulled Jin aside when everyone had gone to bed. "You're working for King Johnny, right?"

Jin nodded, settling into the couch and sighing over how much he'd missed home.

"There are rumors going around as to who might be threatening the forest."

"I still don't get the point of this forest anyway," Jin complained.

Yamapi blinked then shrugged. "I can't find out everything for you."

"What's the point of coming to you for information, then?"

"Because a little information can go a long way," Yamapi said plainly.

Jin snorted. "You stole that from me."

"Who stole it from some foreigner who was passing by," Yamapi added.

"Same difference. So, who's this person?"

"Someone by the name of Nishikido Ryo," Yamapi said, looking thoughtful. "Last I heard, he's supposed to be some leader a number of towns away who, predictably, wants power."

Jin yawned. "Same old, same old. What's different this time?"

"He apparently has some wizard working for him, someone named Tegoshi."

"What?!" a voice exclaimed from the doorway. Peeking into the room were the rest of the members, but the one who'd yelled was Koki. He looked stricken. "Did you just say Tegoshi Yuya?"

"Yeah, Yuya...You know him?" Yamapi asked.

Koki exhaled. "We were taught by the same wizard. He's powerful. Really powerful. Probably more powerful than all of us combined."

Nobody had anything to say after that.

~*~

Onto Part Two

Just Like a Whirlwind - Koyama/Masami [PG]

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 23:42:32 GMT

Just Like A Whirlwind
tinyangl, 2468 words
Koyama Keiichiro/Nagasawa Masami, appearances by Yamapi, Ryo and Shige. Koyama doesn't quite know how to deal with Nagasawa Masami who's unlike anyone he's co-starred with before.
A/N: Written for crystallekil for je_whiteday Ahaha, you probably know who's writing this, my dear, but for the sake of posterity or something, still in anon mode. Lol. Since you've been wanting Koyama!het and because I know you love Nagasawa Masami, this fic came about. I hope you enjoy! ♥ You deserve it after all you've done for us. ♥♥

She's like a whirlwind, entering his life so fast and so hard that Koyama isn't sure if he'll ever recover. Especially after their first meeting when Masami's first words are, "It's nice to meet you! And whatever Yamashita-kun and Nishikido-kun said about me is a complete and utter lie." She follows it up with a wide grin. Koyama blinks at her, half-unsure of how he should act and half-startled just at how forward she is.

"Um. They didn't really--" Koyama starts.

Before he can actually finish his sentence, Masami lets out a sigh of relief. "Oh, great! I was worried they'd tell you all these things and you'd be weird with me and afraid of me, but you shouldn't! I'm a perfectly nice person and they're just strange and weird and--"

"Um," Koyama cuts in. "It's okay," he says, even though he's not even sure what he's saying is okay.

Masami grins at him--all teeth and even a hint of a tongue; her eyes even shine. "I'm so glad! We'll work well together, ne?"

Koyama nods, the only thing he can think to do really, because the next second she's gone and Koyama wonders if that even really happened or if he just imagined Masami talking to him.

Except a few feet over, Masami's talking to Hongo Kanata who has a combination of an awe-struck and stunned look on his face that Koyama starts to think she's just this way with everyone.

It takes him a second before he realizes that his heart is finally calming down.

--

They're shooting a new drama together--Masami as the lead, Koyama as her co-star, her romantic lead. When he first finds out, Yamapi and Ryo are already by his side with words of advice that amount to things like "She likes to laugh. A lot" to "She doesn't like to be tickled." Which only has Ryo and Koyama leveling weird stares at Yamapi, who rolls his eyes. "It wasn't me, guys."

They still look dubious.

"Seriously. I wouldn't--"

"Uh-huh," Ryo interrupts. "Whatever you say, Pi."

Yamapi shakes his head.

"Guys, thanks for the advice, but I've worked with females before," Koyama says. He appreciates their effort, but it's not like he needs it.

"Trust us," Ryo says. "She's not like anyone you've worked with."

--

Koyama calls Yamapi after their first day of shooting, when he's in the privacy of his break room. He doesn't even greet Yamapi like a normal person would. No, instead all he can muster is, "Is she always--"

"Yes," is Yamapi's immediate reaction.

"And--"

"Yes."

"You didn't even hear what I was going to say!" Koyama says, suddenly realizing that he hasn't finished a proper sentence for the past day. He plops himself onto the couch.

He can practically hear the shrug in Yamapi's shoulders. "Whatever you're going to ask is just going to have an immediate 'Yes' response."

"If I asked, is she single?"

Yamapi pauses on the other end. "Well, I'm pretty sure that's a yes, but why would you want to know?"

Koyama shrugs. "Just to throw you off," he says. But a part of him wonders of all the random questions he was going to ask, why he chose that one. He banishes the thought.

"So were you always this tired after shooting?"

"At first," Yamapi says honestly. "She's like a bundle of energy, isn't she?"

A whirlwind, Koyama thinks to himself. A whirlwind would be more appropriate. "Something like that," Koyama says instead, covering his eyes with his hand.

--

Despite his initial exhaustion on the first week, Koyama falls into her natural pacing. Can't be helped when she talks to him. A lot. Half the time, Koyama's not even sure if they're having a conversation so much as she says something and he nods in return. He's not sure if she really needs him for these conversations, but she doesn't go to anyone else. She always, always goes to him.

Koyama likes to chime in when he can, give her something to let her know that he's actually paying attention. And he likes to think that the extra shine in her eyes when he does this is because she wants to hear what he has to say. That it has to be him.

He doesn't know when he started to think this way.

"Koyama," Shige says tiredly over the phone after a ten minute spiel about how Masami's strange and funny and quite possibly the oddest person he's ever met. "You have a crush on her. Will you just get that into your thick brain and ask her out so you can spend these last ten minutes telling her how great she is and not to me?"

Koyama sputters, almost drops his phone before saying in a rush that Shige's completely wrong and he was reading into things way too much.

"Yes, sure. Whatever you say. Now, it's past midnight. I need to get to bed."

Koyama blinks before realizing that it really is and that this was the reason Koyama called in the first place. "Right. Go on to bed! Don't want to be too tired for classes tomorrow," he says like it was his idea all along.

Shige laughs on the other line--this deep, gravely laugh that's laced with exhaustion. "Okay, okay. Have fun shooting tomorrow and don't stare at Masami-chan for too long."

Before Koyama can retort, well, anything against that, Shige hangs up.

The next day, Koyama finds himself staring at Masami a touch too long. To the point that she even turns to look at him with this puzzled expression, as though she's wondering what he wants. He feels his cheeks burn as he shakes his head at her and looks back down at his script.

Shit, he thinks to himself. Koyama suddenly wonders if he's always done this or if he's only noticing now after what Shige said. Either ways, he didn't know what he should do.

--

Around this time, promotions for their drama start up.

Koyama has confidence in his talking abilities, but during their round of promotions, Koyama finds himself listening more than talking. He doesn't do it because of his growing crush (that he's becoming more and more aware of as they act scene upon scene together), but because she has this overwhelming charm about her that grabs everyone's attention, including his.

When Koyama barely says more than a line for the first interview, he doesn't really notice.

It happens a second time and while Koyama's a little puzzled, he lets it go. He tries a little harder on the third, fourth, and fifth interview, but still no change.

That's when he just thinks to go with the flow.

Masami notices by the seventh interview. "Eh, Kei-chan," she says, frowning as they're being driven to their next location. "You didn't say much of anything, did you?"

Koyama shakes his head. "But it's okay, Ma--"

"Of course it's not okay! This drama isn't just me. It's both of us. Our characters searching out the secrets to our past! You're as much a part of this as I am." She pauses. "That's it," Masami declares. "Next interview, I will definitely not talk as much. That way, you get to talk more."

Koyama chuckles. "Masami--"

"Whatever you're about to say, I'm not listening." She starts obnoxiously humming some song, staring out the window on her side of the car. Koyama has to cover his laughter with his hand.

He thinks that the warmth building up in his chest is getting a little too much to bear.

She manages to keep to her promise for at least the next two interviews. By the third, the interviewer asks her so many questions that it's not really in her control. Then they fall into the habit again and Koyama finds himself in the same position. He doesn't mind though.

--

The first time they go out, it's not intentional.

After all, Yamapi and Ryo had been the ones to ask Koyama to set up an evening out with Masami around mid-season. Then at the last, very last minute, Yamapi sends him a drive-by text message that he got caught up at work, and Ryo calls him up and tells him that he was dragged out by some of Kanjani8 and couldn't leave. Koyama understands, but at the same time, he's not entirely sure what he should do--go home since their plans got cancelled or go through with it with just the two of them.

He ends up deciding to just go home right as he's telling her the news.

She shrugs at him. "No problem." Koyama nods, about to turn and leave, except Masami grabs his arm with a frown. "Where are you going, Kei-chan?"

Pause. "Home?"

"No way! We had dinner plans."

"But--"

"Who cares about them?" Masami grins. "It'll be more fun between the two of us anyway." She tugs him towards the door and Koyama follows, unsure and entirely anxious.

--

She laughs when he tells her the story about Yamapi changing the color in Ryo's dye from blonde to green (that hadn't been a pretty look--Koyama had the cell phone picture to prove it) to Ryo's retaliation of drawing on Yamapi's face when he'd been asleep in the break room (another pretty look that Koyama had thankfully captured). The laughter escalates when Koyama tells her that Yamapi had actually walked around the building for a good ten minutes before realizing that everyone had been looking at him funny.

"Boys will be boys, huh?" Masami comments before taking a bite of her pasta.

"Something like that," he says, grinning. Koyama looks down at his still-full plate which he realized he'd barely taken a bite from because he was so distracted telling Masami his stories.

"Kei-chan, eat more! You're skinny enough," she says, gesturing with her fork.

"I was just distracted!" He pointedly eats a forkful of his pasta, his eyes never leaving hers. When he visibly swallows, Masami smiles at him and Koyama feels his heart skip another beat.

They pause in their conversation for a bit to eat before Koyama breaks it, "It's too bad the other two couldn't come."

Masami shrugs. "It's not really a big deal. I think it's fun just with the two of us," she says. She looks up again to catch his gaze and Koyama half-wonders if he's reading too much into her words--if it's okay for him to read into her words.

Her hand brushes against his when they're on their way to Masami's--the restaurant only being a few blocks away from where she lived. Koyama stares straight ahead, but with every bump of her knuckles against his, he can only think about how it's utterly unfair that she'd be teasing him this way. And so easily too.

"We should do this again," Masami says happily at her doorstep. "It was lots of fun and you were a lot more talkative than usual. I liked it."

Koyama laughs. "I'm usually this talkative, but you tend to be more so..."

Her eyes go wide. "Oh! I'm so sor--"

"Masami-chan, it's not big deal," Koyama says, shaking his head. "I don't mind listening either."

She laughs. "You're too nice to me, Kei-chan." With those words, she leans in to wrap him in a tight hug and leaves him with a peck on the cheek before dashing upstairs with a wave of her hand.

Koyama stares, a little stunned before he smiles and walks towards the train station.

--

"So how was your date?" Yamapi asks when Koyama picks up his phone just as he's getting home.

"It wasn't--"

"It was just the two of you, right?" Yamapi sounds like he's half smirking on the other line, Koyama thinks. "Intimate dinner. Private conversation with laughter and inside jokes. Maybe even a kiss when you separated."

Koyama flushes at his words and then he stops to think, throwing his jacket over a chair. "Pi. You didn't have work today, did you?"

Yamapi laughs loudly at the other end. "Of course I did." He pauses. "By the way, Ryo says hi."

Koyama hangs up, rolling his eyes. Except his phone goes off again--just once though and Koyama opens it to find a new text from Ryo. "You're a slowpoke, so we're just looking out for you." Koyama wonders when his love life became their business.

--

"It is when I have to listen to you talk about Masami-chan nonstop," Shige explains.

Koyama pauses. "So then why are Yamapi and Ryo matchmaking?"

"Because then they hear me talk about you and your Masami-chan issues."

"...And why are you telling them?"

"Because I know it'll amuse them?"

"You suck as a best friend."

Shige only laughs on the other line.

--

Koyama makes the decision to ask her out. Except, Masami beats him to the punch as always. "We should go out again like last night," she says cheerfully as they're starting to get ready to shoot a new scene.

Koyama pauses. "Yeah, except--"

"Except it'll be a proper date, ne?" She grins as she turns to face him. He wonders if he's gaping like he thinks he is.

"I--"

"And next time, Pii-tan and Dok-kun won't have to pretend to not be able to make it so that we can have dinner alone. You can just ask me directly." She laughs a little before turning around to get into position across the room where the director sets her up.

Koyama shakes his head with a smile. Just like a whirlwind, he remembers. This rush of wind that's come into his life with such intensity that Koyama can barely remember what life was before her. He doesn't mind being caught. Masami makes it worth it.

Omake:

"See, this always happens," Ryo growls from across the table. "We get a guy together with a girl and all that happens is he becomes worse fawning over her."

Koyama shrugs. "You should've thought of that first."

"A three month span of fawning or more than three months," Shige says, before sighing. "Yeah, might've wanted to think this over."

"You do realize I'm right here," Masami says dryly, leveling a glare at the three across the booth. Yamapi holds up his hands innocently, but Ryo only smirks at her. Shige pointedly looks away into his glass drink. Masami eyes him curiously. "Just because you're looking away doesn't mean I'm not glaring at you."

Shige flushes, but he won't raise his eyes and Koyama has to laugh at that. "You would think you'd be used to Masami-chan by now, Shige."

"Shut up," he mutters under his breath. "I still think she's scary."

"Again, right here," Masami sing-songs, but she takes a sip of her drink and finally looks away from Shige. Yamapi comforts Shige by patting him on the back, shrugging.

"Just be thankful you haven't shot a drama with her yet."

Masami grins. "Speaking of that..."

Shige pales while Koyama stares at Masami. "You're joking."

"It's just a special, but still. Hope we work well together, Shige-chan," she coos. Shige looks like he wants to physically bury himself in the ground. The other two look at him sympathetically, although there are hints of grins that they're struggling to hide.

"Well, it'll be an experience," Koyama says with a laugh. "That's for sure. Don't scare him too much, Masami-chan."

"I can't make any promises," she returns, grinning. Koyama squeezes her hand under the table; the grin on his face doesn't budge.

White Day (Rarepairs Style) [PG-13]

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 23:32:31 GMT

White Day (Rarepairs Style)
tinyangl, 1549 words
Yamapi/Nagasawa Masami, Jin/Sawajiri Erika, Koyama/Aragaki Yui, Ryo/Toda Erika/Nino, Aiba/Becky
A/N: Written for je_whiteday as a bit of a prize. ~~And not at all to make our number to a perfect 50. XD~~

i. Yamapi/Nagasawa Masami

"Here," Yamapi mumbles under his breath, tossing her a package as he enters her dressing room.

Masami scrambles to catch it, leans in just enough to avoid dropping it. "Ah?" she asks, staring at him wide-eyed.

"You told me not to forget," Yamapi says, sitting down in her chair in front of her mirror.

"Wow, Pii-tan," she says dryly, getting off the couch to move over to where he is. "You're quite the romantic, aren't you?" Masami leans down to wrap her arms around him from behind, pecking him on the cheek. "But I guess it's better than nothing."

Yamapi rolls his eyes. "Thanks, Masami-chan. Way to make a guy feel special."

She laughs--that same laugh that always feels real. "You're lucky I like you."

"You mean, that's why I get that much?" Yamapi retorts, tilting back to look her eye-to-eye.

Masami grins. "Well, that and then some?" she winks.

"You're great," Yamapi says before leaning in to sweep his lips against hers. "Now open your present."

"Okay, okay. Demanding much?" She moves to snag the package from the table before unwrapping it--wrapped and tied in pink, she notes in amusement--and opening up the small box to find a ball of chocolate. One chocolate. "What. Really?" She looks up at Yamapi who's smirking.

"The rest are back at my place." Masami swears she sees a waggle of his eyebrows.

"Wow," she laughs. "You are smooth." Yamapi grins wickedly at her.

ii. Jin/Sawajiri Erika

Erika knew from day one that Akanishi Jin was not normal. Which worked well for her because she was anything but normal as well. But even she thought that the idea of a guy taking a girl out to a club for White Day was ridiculous. Even if it was the one where they'd met.

"Really?" she asks darkly when they stop in front of those familiar doors. She turns to face him, crossing her arms, and nicely manicured nails rap against her arm.

Jin only grins, gesturing her to enter the club, but she's refuses. "No. I don't think so."

"Will you trust me?" Jin says, a tinge of exasperation--Erika thinks he has no right acting exasperated here. She's the one being slighted.

"No. Because it's you."

Jin stops, thinks about it, and shrugs. "Point. But just. Will you enter?"

Erika huffs before turning back to the door and throwing it open. She expects loud music and the chattering of people's voice one on top of the other and the heat that just flows through a club in waves. But she gets silence. A spotlight hits a table in the middle and she feels Jin leading her inside. "See," he murmurs. "I can be romantic."

She scoffs, but there's a part of her that does feel a little--okay, a lot touched by the gesture. "Barely," Erika says instead.

Jin laughs before sitting her down and then handing her a box that was sitting to the side of one of the seats. "And here's more."

Inside is a lacy red negligee that barely leaves anything to the imagination--that also looks strikingly familiar for some reason. "I asked Kuroki Meisa for the store she got hers from," Jin says with a smirk, leaning against his elbows.

Erika rolls her eyes. Okay, maybe he had a little more to learn.

iii. Koyama/Aragaki Yui

He does it to be polite, she thinks.

Yui stares at Koyama in surprise when he hands her chocolate and tells her with a smile on his face that he enjoyed her role in Code Blue. "Um," Yui says slowly, a little thrown. "Thanks, I--I appreciate that, Koyama-kun."

Yamapi's throwing a big party on White Day of all days, and Yui would normally not show up to these types of things but Yamapi had insisted and she felt like it could be fun. Except here is Koyama Keiichiro handing her chocolate and complimenting her and making her feel a little embarrassed with the whole situation.

"I hope you're enjoying yourself, Aragaki-chan."

"Um, yes. I talked to a couple of people that I haven't talked to for a long time," she tells him, biting her bottom lip and trying hard not to feel awkward in her own shoes.

Koyama seems to be trying hard to get her to talk more, kind of endearing in his efforts, but it takes her some time to get used to a person and in the middle of a big party while people are yelling for someone to chug doesn't seem like the most mood-making situation.

"Yui-chan!" Yui turns around to face Yamapi who's grinning brightly, cheeks tinged with red, and swaying his way towards them. "I see you've met Kei-chan!" He moves to stand next to Koyama who stares at Yamapi with concern. Yamapi doesn't seem to notice though as he slings an arm over his taller friend.

"Pi, how many--"

Koyama doesn't get to finish his sentence because Yamapi swiftly ignores him, interrupting with "Yui-chan, you know. Kei-chan's a huge fan of yours." Yui blinks, startled. But it doesn't beat Koyama's immediate reaction of nearly choking Yamapi as he covers Yamapi's mouth with his hand.

"Pi's...had a lot to drink," Koyama says weakly to Yui as he starts to shift Yamapi into another room. "I'm sorry about this." He abruptly leaves, and Yui's left standing there. Just blinking. She shakes her head before digging into her purse to find her card and scribbles a note in the back. She hands it to Shige who promises to pass it onto Koyama, although Yui sees a hint of a smirk on his face. She leaves the party with a smile and the thought that maybe it wasn't too terrible a party.

Maybe next time, we can talk a little better over a cup of coffee.

iv. Ryo/Toda Erika/Nino

They're shoving their way into her dressing room.

Erika's not even sure how they knew she'd be at work today, but she guesses she shouldn't underestimate their abilities. "Nii-sans," she says firmly. Ryo and Nino suddenly freeze--like they hadn't realized she was watching them or like they'd been caught doing something horrible. "Why are you two here?"

"Chocolates," they say at the same time. Then glare at each other right after.

"Oh!" Erika says happily before jumping up to give them each a hug--first to Nino, because he's closer, but that doesn't stop him from leveling a smirk in Ryo's direction, and then to Ryo. She then follows it up with kisses on the cheek. "You're both so nice! We're not even filming anymore."

"I thought it'd be the right thing to do," Ryo says, smiling at her a little shyly.

"You mean, we thought," Nino snaps, glaring at Ryo. If Ryo notices, he doesn't give a hint.

Erika laughs. "You're both great." She takes each of their packages with a thanks before there's a knock on her door. They turn to find a delivery man bringing her a large bouquet of flowers and Erika has to marvel at their size. "Thanks," she says in stunned amazement, putitng them down on her vanity table and plucking the note tucked in between the deep pink roses. "Ah!" Erika exclaims, and Ryo and Nino try not to noticably push each other out of the way to see who sent them. They're saved from their struggles because next second, Erika says loudly, "They're from Yamashita-kun!"

Ryo and Nino turn to each other and both think the same thing. What a suck-up.

Erika, on the other hand, thinks it's a great day.

v. Aiba/Becky

Coincidentally, Becky just happens to be guesting on the VS Arashi episode that's meant to air on White Day as it is, so Aiba thinks this is probably a sign. It's not like they don't see each other a lot as it is--working on the same show after all, but there's something different about the fact that she's guesting on one of his, or rather Arashi's shows.

"Ne, ne, Becky," he chimes, barging into her dressing room.

Becky doesn't shriek in surprise, barely even spends a second looking in his direction before going back to touching up her make-up. "Aiba-chan, what are you doing in here?"

He half-kneels as he leans against her vanity table, looking up at her with a giant smile. "Where's my chocolate?"

She pauses for a second, then turns to face him, leaning in dangerously close so that he can catch the sight of the sunflowers that supposedly bloom in her eyes--a little too close for now. "It's White Day, idiot. It's the other way around."

"Well, okay. If you say so." He thankfully shifts out of his position to grab the box of chocolates he had in his bag and plops it on the table in front of her. "Here you go, Becky~"

Becky blinks at him in surprise. "Eh?"

"Happy White Day~" he leans in to press lips against hers and then dashes out of the room, grinning widely. It takes Becky a little longer to recover from the surprise attack before she finally dashes into the hallways--where there's no sign of Aiba--but she yells anyway, "Aiba-chan, you're a sneak!"

Becky swears she hears his usual giggle, but she ignores it in favor of going over to the box where a sole white card sits in between the ribbons.

We should go out after shooting, ne?

Becky thinks that if he wanted to ask her out, he should've done it face-to-face. She sighs, tucking the card inside her purse and then grabbing one of the chocolates. She supposes it wouldn't hurt to go. For payback though, she'll be late. Serves him right.

One Hundred Minutes - Koichi/Yui [PG-13]

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 23:29:06 GMT

One Hundred Minutes
tinyangl, 1943 words
Domoto Koichi/Aragaki Yui. Their time is always in batches of one hundred minutes.
A/N: Written for lullabyeforyou for je_whiteday. Inspiration for this and the title is taken from Yui's "Heavenly Days" song. It's a weird pairing (don't I know it), but hopefully, it kind of works? I tried to capture a bittersweet, more serious feel that you wanted. XD I really hope you enjoy, lullabyeforyou. Happy White Day! ♥

i.

He won't look at her.

Yui's not surprised as she steps onto the set ten minutes before shooting, saying her greetings to everyone there--including him. If it wasn't for the almost undetectable nod he throws in her direction, Yui would think he didn't hear her at all. Yui remembers distinctly Nagase's words to her about two weeks ago when she first found out about her new drama with Domoto Koichi--of course, this was after the initial surprise that Nagase even had her number. (Through contacts, he says. Yamapi, she thinks.)

"Ko-chan's just odd with females, so if he doesn't talk to you on the first day, it's nothing against you."

Yui raises an eyebrow, craddling the phone between her head and shoulder. "And why--"

"Because," Nagase says simply. He hangs up a few seconds later after giving her his warm wishes.

This is why even when they're shooting for the poster, and Yui wants to laugh at the stupid white chef's hat atop Koichi's head that keeps tilting too much to the side and he's refusing to look her way, Yui's not offended.

She is surprised when he turns to her at the end of an hour and a half of flashes of light and people constantly touching up her make-up and her hair being squeezed into another ponytail to just tell her a simple "You did well today."

She blinks up at him, echoes the words back without really noticing and watches as he walks away, the white hat crumpled in his hands. Yui doesn't quite understand the skip of her heart beat. Odd, she tells herself as she walks off set and into her dressing room. Really, really odd.

ii.

She blames the drama, really.

If Yui wasn't filming this drama where her character develops this crush for Koichi's character, she wouldn't find herself imitating the same feelings. She wouldn't be admiring the determination Koichi has to get his character just right. She wouldn't be noticing the small smiles on his face when he's pleased. She wouldn't be noticing the pout he gets when someone's teasing him.

She wouldn't, shouldn't be noticing these things.

Most of her likes to think that Koichi notices her just as much--that his eyes linger on her figure as they're filming some scene. That his smile--this lopsided smile that she only catches in her peripheral is pointed towards her.

All of her though thinks that she shouldn't have accepted his offer to dinner. Because they wouldn't be right together, wouldn't match.

But Koichi asks her with that shy smile of his, eyes that still couldn't see her straight on, and oddly enough, his open phone clutched tightly in his right hand. Yui feels heat rising to her cheeks, the tips of her ears and even to the tips of her fingers before she finally accepts.

Koichi's eyes shine and he asks her if that night would be okay. She agrees and Koichi steps out of her dressing room, lifting his phone back up to his ear where Yui vaguely hears him say with a tone of annoyance, "Tsuyoshi, why did I have to confess with you on the phone again?" Yui tries not to laugh.

They're only able to get a late dinner--due to filming. But Yui doesn't mind, barely notices really because she's more glad to be out with Koichi. She can barely talk she's so nervous. For that matter, Koichi doesn't speak--staring at his menu with such intensity that Yui wonders if there's some sort of puzzle in its pages that he can't piece together and that's why he's so silent.

"I don't know what to do," Koichi says sheepishly after a pause of a half hour--not that Yui was glancing at her watch or anything.

Yui lifts her head, looking away from the tablecloth to Koichi. "Hmm?"

"I don't--" he starts before the plates are put in front of them. He takes a breath before re-starting. "This is weird, isn't it?"

Pause. "Not really?" Yui says, hoping she sounds a little believable--it's weird, but not at the same time. She's not sure how to answer it so she decides on the safer response. "We're just not used to seeing each other off-set yet." Yui gives him a bright smile.

Koichi chuckles for a bit before leaning in. "Why did you agree?"

Yui freezes before she retorts, "Why'd you ask?"

"Because," Koichi answers; he looks away again.

"Then because is my answer too."

Koichi laughs again, this time louder. "I didn't realize you could be so annoying."

Yui tries not to roll her eyes and instead jokes, "My nickname is Gakky for a reason."

Koichi grins at her before gesturing towards the food. "We should dig in. It looks really good."

"Yeah, it does," Yui agrees. She waits a little, watches as Koichi takes a bit of rice and then sighs happily as he takes a bite. "Good?"

He nods before smiling at her, eyes meeting hers--straight and unwavering. Yui doesn't think she can breath. "You should eat too," Koichi says, breaking her gaze.

They're there for another hour, eating and talking and joking--would've been longer if they hadn't been mindful of the fact that they had shooting again in the morning and it was already late enough. "I enjoyed myself," Yui tells him.

Koichi nods, leaning against his car. They're standing in front of her place after Koichi had insisted that he dropped her off, like he "should." "I'm glad."

Yui doesn't think he knows what he should do next so she leans forward, hands delicately on his shoulders just for balance as she lightly brushes her lips against his cheek. She thinks she can hear Koichi suck in his breath but she pulls back faster than she'd expected. Smiles before quickly turning on her heel and rushing into her house. The door's solid and sturdy behind her, which is good because Yui can't stand anymore--feels her legs give out underneath her, and she collapses against the door, resting her head against the wood.

It takes her a few minutes before she can get up again and head to her room. The beep of her phone goes off and Yui wonders how she'd missed a message, but she doesn't care because it's a message from Koichi. "Can we do this again?" he asks simply--no use of emoticons (which she's somewhat glad for) and nothing else to add to the message.

Yui punches in an equally simple, "Yes."

iii.

Yui learns to relish any time they can spend together.

It turns out that their first date is something of a fluke because after that, they can't even find the time to schedule a second date, instead using their break time in between shooting in order to get some time together--to get to know each other, to just be in each other's presence, to be themselves and not their characters (who, by episode seven, have finally acknowledged something going on between them--which Yui suspects just means that nothing will happen by the last episode to her disappointment).

This also is why Yui finds herself just sitting on Koichi's couch with Koichi's arm around her and the television playing some drama that neither of them are really watching. It's late at night after a shooting of just her scenes so this is the first she's seen of Koichi all day, but even that isn't enough to keep her eyes from drooping only a half hour after she'd just arrived.

Koichi's arm is warm against hers and the steady rise and fall of his chest as he breathes lulls her to a sleep.

Next thing she knows, her phone goes off at exactly midnight and Yui moans as she reaches to stop it from ringing--that same annoying tone she's heard day in and day out. "I know," she yawns into the phone as she stretches her arms over her head.

"I'll be downstairs," her manager says.

"Mmm," she replies, hanging up. Koichi looks at her with bleary eyes that have to mirror her own. His arm has since fallen from her shoulders and is now around her waist.

"You have to leave," he says. It's no longer a question since it has been a little over a month since they've started this routine.

Yui nods, trying to mask her sigh--it's not the first time she's thought that she wishes she were older. More mature. More able to deal with this constant reminder that they're idols and relationships aren't allowed--especially one that's nine years apart. Koichi looks at her--which takes her breath away again every time he does--and smiles, shaking his head.

"Tomorrow then," he says simply.

She nods before leaning in and brushing her lips against his cheek, always his cheek. "Tomorrow," she echoes.

Sometimes, when she thinks back, she wishes she'd stayed up. That they spent more time taking or joking around or anything. At the same time, Yui feels like it's just the way they are and that this way was just so them that it wouldn't do to change anything.

iv.

They break up.

Not because of anything on either of their parts, not really. It's just too complicated to just meet up, too much strain to remember what's allowed and what's not, and despite Yui's adoration for him--she can't call it love, most definitely not--something about time makes it taper at the edges.

She blames the drama all over again.

Yui's not sure if it really was her character acting through her, or if what was once there is actually just not meant to be. But it all but vanishes and Yui closes her eyes as Koichi holds her on that last day.

He doesn't say anything, doesn't need to. Instead, they just stand there, remembering everything that happened in a span of three months--both on set and off.

"Goodbye," Koichi ends up murmuring in her ear as he takes a step back.

Yui's not sure how she feels about the word, doesn't think it's entirely appropriate because it's not really a goodbye between them. Just a small separation. She says instead, "Thank you."

Koichi blinks at her in surprise before smiling. He turns around and walks out of the room.

It's the last thing she remembers seeing of Koichi--his departing back and how he's never looked as charming and strong to her as he did just then.

v.

They see each other again, a few years later.

It's not for any random reason--it's for work, as always. Yui's on Domoto Kyoudai, her first appearance actually, to promote some movie and connecting single. Koichi smiles at her, asks her how she's been and there's something so familiar about him that Yui can't help but get caught up again in his smile and the hand that's resting on hers as he talks to her.

"Koichi-san," Tsuyoshi says at the doorway in this scolding tone. "You're supposed to be on stage already." He gives Yui a crooked smile over Koichi's shoulder. "Aragaki-chan, you shouldn't be keeping the MC behind. That's not good."

Yui laughs, shaking her head and taking the time to steal a glance at the clock--how they'd managed to talk for over an hour (she arrived earlier than she was supposed to), she wasn't sure.

Koichi looks up at the clock and jumps out of his seat, the warmth of his hand leaving her in an instant. "Oh! I didn't realize!" He rushes out the door, but not before turning to Yui and telling her that she'd do great.

"Thanks, Koichi-san," she says politely before watching him dash in the direction of the stage.

Tsuyoshi lingers for a few minutes before telling her, "He did like you."

Yui stares, before smiling. "I know."

Tsuyoshi gives her a nod before walking out and Yui takes in a deep breath.

It's weird, she thinks later. Nothing had changed between them, even with a few years under the belt, and Yui was sure that even a few years later, it would still be the same. Just that makes her realize that she's grown up.

One Step at a Time - Takuma/Kozue [PG]

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 23:27:15 GMT

One Step at a Time
tinyangl, 2527 words
Takuma/Kozue (Sore wa Totsuzen, Arashi no You ni). It's been six years since Takuma's seen Kozue, but some things never change.
A/N: Written for javiera for je_whiteday! ♥ I hope you enjoy this! I've never written Sore wa... fic even though I have wanted to for ages. ♥♥ So thanks for at least pushing me towards writing this. *laughs* And thanks to my beta, cynicalism, as always for going over this, even though she was busy~ ♥

One.

Takuma stops short in the middle of the road, eyes fixed on a figure approaching in the distance. Even in the middle of a large crowd rushing in his direction, his attention is caught by her. The world goes on around him: people pass him by, a kid bumps into his leg, the walk sign switches to a blinking "don't walk," and she walks towards him. The neon red sign blinks annoyingly in his eye, makes him want to look away, but that means taking his eyes off her, and even though it's impossible for her to just disappear, he feels like it could happen. She hasn't noticed his gaze, hasn't noticed him standing there, because her focus is on the bag at her side, rummaging through it as though in search of something important. It's right before she reaches the middle of the road that she finally lifts her head.

It doesn't even take a second.

Her eyes flicker with something akin to recognition, her hand dropping from her bag as her lips fall open, forming his name--"Takuma"--and even though she doesn't say anything, Takuma can hear her voice perfectly in his mind's ear. His breath catches.

Someone tugs on his arm, pulling him towards the middle and away from running cars where he'd just been standing. "Pay attention, kid," some guy barks at his side--Takuma can't even think to correct him. Doesn't even think to thank him--his eyes still focused on the figure in front of him, drawn to her as he has always been.

"Takuma," she says, except it's the second time to Takuma because her voice hasn't changed at all, like the rest of her--still as beautiful and breath-taking. Time had only changed her age. And his, for that matter.

"Kozue-san," he finally says, and the look on her face softens.

It's been 6 years--not only since he's last seen her, but since he's last walked down this previously familiar street. A part of him thinks that he should have known he'd see her this day.

Two.

He pulls her towards the dance studio--the dance studio that's now his--despite her protests and despite her insistence that she has work to get to. Takuma knows he should let her go on her way, show that he's grown up from those childish, selfish ways, but he's also sure that if he lets her go now, the chance of them seeing each other again are slim.

When he throws open the door, Kozue's hand squeezes his. Takuma looks back in surprise, and from the equally surprised look on her face, he quickly figures that she probably didn't intend to do that. He doesn't say a word, lets go of her hand and walks into the room.

He thinks he can hear the hitch in her throat as she follows him, her footsteps light against the wooden floor--so light that Takuma fears that she has left.

"It hasn't changed," Kozue says after a pause. Takuma puts down his bag and sets his jacket on the back of some chair. He turns to find Kozue looking around with mild-awe on her face, tingled with remembrance.

"It has, a little," Takuma tells her, walking forward. "For one thing, we changed the clock. The mirror's different even though you can't really tell, since it's the same style."

Kozue laughs, turning to face the mirror. She pauses as she stares at her reflection. Takuma stands behind her, a head taller than her. His black hair, that's a bit on the long side, almost blends into hers so that he can't tell where his ends and hers starts. "You've changed," she says, almost nonchalantly, looking curiously into the mirror.

"Only a little," Takuma replies with a quirk of a smile. Her eyes pierce his through the reflection and suddenly, even though he'd been joking, Takuma feels that any change he had is just as he said. Very small and very insignificant. Like he's still the boy that had fallen in love with her all those years ago.

In some ways, Takuma thinks that maybe he is.

Together.

"One. Two. Together," Takuma repeats, his hand firmly holding hers as they step from one spot to the next.

The shine in her eyes when she dances is there, like a breath of fresh air, reminding him of times he can barely remember but remember clearly all at the same time. Kozue starts to hum happily, excitedly--a tune that Takuma didn't know she knew, but that was common in dancing.

He comes to a stop. "How do you know that?"

Kozue blinks. "Know what?"

"That song."

She blinks again before flushing. "I--"

"You've learned, haven't you?" Takuma accuses, not sure if he's mad or surprised by this revelation.

"Just glanced at a lesson or two," Kozue answers, staring him down as though daring him to doubt her. "Remember? I don't have the time to do things like this."

Takuma laughs. "You were always bad at lying."

She flushes before pulling away from him, shaking her hand out of Takuma's grip--he doesn't want to let go, but he does anyway. "So where is everyone? Usually sensei comes out about now and badgers me to sign up for lessons."

Takuma snorts, moving towards the table and fiddling with a drawer. He can feel Kozue's curious gaze on him, but he doesn't stop to explain. Instead, he pulls out ten dance tickets and hands them to her. "You should join us. I'd give you the whole speech but I'm sure you've heard it enough from us. We'll even let you have the school's best teacher." He poses, straightening his back and forming the proper stance with his arms.

"Now you're the salesman too?"

"I always was," Takuma retorts. "You were just a special cause."

"What, are you trying to flatter me?"

"Isn't that a little too presumptuous of you?" He asks, staring at her and trying valiantly to keep the smirk from his face. Kozue doesn't react though. Instead, she just "hmm"s before turning around and staring at the mirror anew, looking at his figure.

"You really have changed," she says again.

Takuma stands in her line of sight, frowning. "I'm standing right here."

Kozue stares at him with unwavering eyes. "I know."

One.

She picks up on the second ring. "So what group am I under now? Still third?"

Takuma's in such shock that Kozue answered that it takes him a moment to realize what she's asking. "Eh? Oh. I don't know. I haven't decided yet. Where should I put you?"

"You're actually asking me?"

Takuma cradles his cell in between his shoulder and ear as he leans against his broom, looking blankly into the wall in front of him. "Why not?"

"I think I liked being in group 3."

"Well," Takuma says with a smirk. "I should probably have let you know before that I've changed my system around. Group 3 is now filled with people I could sleep with and would like to, but they're smarter than that."

Pause. "You're joking, right?"

Takuma laughs loudly. "Maybe. Would you really like to know the answer?"

Another pause. "No," Kozue says a moment too late.

"It's just you," Takuma replies, even if she hadn't asked. "It'll always just be you," he says honestly.

They hang up a few minutes later and Takuma sighs, leaning against his broom again.

Two.

Three weeks. That's how long it takes before Takuma sees Kozue step back onto the dance studio. Takuma stares wide-eyed at her figure at the door, leaning against his broom. "Kozue-san," he says. "What are you--"

"I thought I'd take you up on that offer for lessons," she says, shutting the door behind her.

"I--Dance lessons aren't until later though."

"You don't make any exceptions?" Kozue asks with a half-smile, stepping closer and closer until the broom slips out of his hands and Takuma feels his body just move without being conscious of it--pulling her hand into his, a hand slipping to her waist and steady. He takes in a breath and steps, one foot to the side. Another only a few inches away, and then together.

Kozue breathes steadily, tickling the side of his neck. Takuma half wants to close his eyes, relish in just the feel of Kozue in his arms again--even though it'd just been a couple of weeks ago, it still feels like it's been forever. His grip gets a touch tighter than before and to his surprise, Kozue squeezes back.

They're not dancing to music, but Takuma doesn't think they need any. They still remember, after all.

Together.

Takuma looks around the small apartment in surprise, sitting down at the table in the middle of the room. He never went inside before, stopping right at the door, but even from what little he could remember seeing, it didn't seem like it'd changed. "You didn't want to go to any place better?" he asks.

Kozue shakes her head, not facing him as she moves from the stove to a cutting board by the sink. "It's still sentimental. I don't want to leave unless I find another special place that's just mine." Takuma feels these words hovering at the tip of his tongue, but it's only been about three months since they met up again--only three months. Barely enough time.

He doesn't speak instead, out of fear of what words would come out of his mouth if he opened it. He just murmurs some noise--something that could be interpreted as agreement or acceptance or anything really.

"What, no comments?"

Takuma chuckles, pushing his bangs out of his eyes. "Why say something when I can just enjoy the moment?"

Kozue's chopping stops suddenly and Takuma blinks as she turns around to face him. "What--" he starts, but Kozue's kneeling down in front of him, her hand reaching out to slowly shift his bangs out of the way.

"You've changed," she says softly. It comes to him in a flash--the reality of their ages, the fact that they haven't seen each other for six years, the knowledge that the past few years have been rough but he's braved it alone, the feeling of never fully being happy. Then the warmth of her hand on his cheek spreads through his body. Takuma shuts his eyes and leans into her touch, nodding.

"Yes, I have." And not just him, but those words go unspoken.

Neither of them move.

One.

Takuma wonders if he can accurately predict what Kozue's thinking as she fidgets in the seat in front of him. Her napkin falls onto the floor and she nearly falls out of her chair trying to pick it up. She pulls her wrap over her bare shoulders a little more than before to Takuma's great disappointment. Even though Takuma repeatedly insists that she doesn't need to hide a thing. She continues to bite at her lower lip. And at one point, Takuma almost swears that she brings a hand to her wrist. As though there's a weight there that is missing. He tries not to think on that.

Instead, Takuma grins, leaning his elbows against the table. "You're acting like a girl out on that date she's always wanted with the boy she's always wanted."

Kozue snorts, patting the napkin on her lap again. "You got the boy part right," she mumbles.

"Stop being so self-conscious."

"Easy for you to say. I'm the old lady with the hot young guy in front of her. You could have your pick of the girls in this restaurant, I bet."

Takuma leans forwards, making sure that she's looking straight at him. "You just want to hear me say what I've said over and over again, Kozue-san. I didn't take you to be one to fish for compliments."

Kozue rolls her eyes, but Takuma catches the smidgen of amusement in both her eyes and the quirk of a smile at the corners of her lips. "You're as cheeky as ever."

"It's part of my charm?" he asks, laughing before reaching over to grasp her hand in his.

Kozue stops fidgeting five minutes later.

Two.

It's not that Takuma's surprised. ...Okay, no. He's insanely surprised and he's not even sure he can breathe at this moment. Kozue frowns at him, actually moves to pull back the box in her hands before Takuma reaches out and grabs it.

Her lips form a "What" but she never gets it out because Takuma knocks the breath out of her when he pulls her in for a hug. He's grown since the last time he's held her in his arms, and even though it's not at all possible, Kozue feels like she's gotten smaller to him. He wraps his arms around her, and this time, Takuma allows himself to close his eyes and just cling to her--half in desperation, half in happiness.

Kozue's arms move around his waist and Takuma feels his heart pound faster--her arms trying to pull him closer even though they're close enough already. It takes a little bit more time before Kozue says--a little muffled since she's talking into his shirt, "They were just some chocolates."

Takuma shakes his head. "Not just some chocolates. Kozue-san's chocolates. On Valentine's Day." He doesn't mention the fact that it's been 8 months and 3 weeks, and counting.

Kozue's face warms against his shoulder; Takuma chuckles knowingly, but doesn't say a word. Kozue knows what he's laughing about though and she mumbles a "Shut up" before turning to lean her cheek instead, looking pointedly towards the wall. The clock blinks brightly in neon from one number to the next--13 to 14 to 15.

She sighs loudly.

"Hmm?"

"The old clock was better, but..." Kozue pauses. "The change isn't bad either."

Another pause. "Are you really trying to say that you think this time for us will be okay without saying it?"

"Do you have to point these things out?"

"Yes," Takuma laughs. He holds her for a little bit longer.

Together.

They're dancing again. Takuma feels like 3/4ths of his life has just been spent dancing but he doesn't mind. Kozue takes every step with him, confidently and with such grace that Takuma thinks it's a shame she only found about dancing at a later point in her life. They end, posing in front of the mirrors and Takuma pauses, looking up and admiring the way the dress Kozue's wearing falls over her, the way it molds to her body and the way the v-neck dips just--

Kozue smacks him on the arm, straightening as she untangles away from him. "I saw where those eyes were going."

"Can you blame me?" Takuma asks, shrugging as he moves to grab a bottle of water.

"Yes, of course I can."

Takuma snorts, passing her the bottle of water after he's done. She takes it gratefully, but as soon as the tip of the bottle touches her lips, Takuma says loudly, "Indirect kiss!"

Kozue freezes, dropping her arm and glaring at Takuma. "How old are you again?" she asks.

He grins. "As old as you want me to be?"

"You're still so young," she sighs, finally taking that sip of water. Takuma doesn't say anything; instead, as soon as she's done, takes the bottle out of her hands and pulls her into position again.

He stares at her, and she does the same, unwaveringly as always. "It doesn't matter," Takuma finally says. "I'm whatever age I have to be." Kozue looks a little reluctant to believe him, but she nods nonetheless. "Dance again?"

Kozue pauses before smiling at him. "Yes."

They take the first step.

Keep on taking steps and it becomes a dance.

Posing for the Camera - Kame/Yamapi!Friendship [PG-13]

Mon, 02 Feb 2009 18:50:18 GMT

Posing for the Camera
tinyangl, 4485 words
Kame/Yamapi, Kame/Koki, Yamapi/Jin, Koki/Jin. Gen!fic. With mention of Okada. ~~Because I am biased.~~ AU. Kame and Koki pride themselves on being the top-selling modeling duo in Johnny's Jimusho, except Jin and Yamapi appear and Kame's a little worried about what this'll mean for his status. Johnny then throws things more into a frenzy by having the duos swap partners.
A/N: Written for maya_morning and sollasollew11 in thanks for running je_ficgames. :D That's why there is lots of Kame in this. lol Even though I fail at writing Kame. XD

If there's anything Kamenashi Kazuya knows better than modeling, it's making money. As one half of the up-and-coming modeling duo, Kame would know how best to market himself (and, of course, his partner, Tanaka Koki). The Jimusho--Johnny's Jimusho to everyone else--is basically made up of modeling duos; each duo has their own little niche: classy, sporty, boys next door, cute, angsty, goofy, etc. For Kame and Koki, they were under the "sexy" category, or as Koki once jokingly called it, "the boys you want to take home and fuck till you can't breathe anymore." (Kame had hit him over the head for that.)

Kame loves his job, is good at his job, and doesn't think anyone could be better than him and Koki. Even one of their previous sempais--Okada Junichi who had become a photographer after falling in love with his camera--had approved of at least his work ethic and if there was anyone Kame respected more, it had to be Okada.

That's what he thinks anyway, until a new duo joins the Jimusho. They move in right across the hall from Kame and Koki's dorm room.

"Hey! Akanishi Jin. And this guy's Yamashita Tomohisa," Akanishi greets as soon as Kame opens the door. Kame blinks.

"Er, hi," Kame responds, leaning against his door. "New blood, huh? A little older than Johnny usually takes in."

Akanishi snorts. "Is that supposed to be a crack at our age? Wow, I heard models were bitchy and vindictive, but..." Yamashita elbows Akanishi in the side before turning to Kame.

"Sorry about him. I forgot to put a muzzle on him before allowing him to interact with normal people," Yamashita says dryly. Kame can't stop the laugh that bubbles out after that--he notices the surprise quirk in Yamashita's eye after that reaction and is mildly pleased by it.

"So what do you guys think you'll be doing?" Kame asks, more out of necessity than curiosity.

Akanishi shrugs. "They said they're going to just try us out in all the fields at first. Something about not being sure." The words throw Kame for a loop because that's not normal in Johnny's--they know instantly what each duo will work where and what will get them more jobs. He tries to keep his expression neutral though--lest they find out what he thinks.

"Well, I hope you guys enjoy then." Kame gives a curt nod before shutting the door.

Behind it, he can hear Akanishi complain. "He didn't even ask us to stay for dinner."

"Maybe he doesn't invite random people who just show up to dinner so easily."

"I would," Akanishi says with some bite in his words.

"That's only because you like bigger dinners because it means more food."

"Mmm. Can we go get that now on that note?" Kame hears Yamashita's laugh before hearing their footsteps as they go down the stairs.

Kame wrinkles his nose as he goes back to the living room. Koki comes out of the shower at that moment, drying his hair with his towel. "Who was at the door?" he asks as Kame relaxes on the couch again.

"Competition," Kame says simply. Koki arches a perfect eyebrow before slumping into the spot next to Kame.

"Oh, is that it?" Kame smirks--and this is why they're a good pair.

--

Kame hears about Yamashita and Akanishi for the next week. A little too much information, Kame thinks, that ranges from useful--like Yamashita was a kouhai's of Takizawa's somewhere--to absolutely pointless--why does he have to know that they have a secret handshake? And how in God's green earth is that cute, Kame thinks sneering when Koyama, the resident babblemouth, decides that he has to know.

What Kame does find useful is that apparently, the Jimusho is having a tough time categorizing the two and that just makes Kame pissed. He's sure if they had given all the duos a chance, they could all do each category well, but they hadn't been given a chance, and why would these nobodys get the opportunity?

"You know, it's not always a competition," Koki says offhandedly after Kame throws a magazine across the room--it was one of Pin's (their new nickname around the Jimusho building that Kame thinks is absolutely ridiculous until he finds out that it's actually the name of their pet dog and thus moved from the animal to the pair) photoshoots, a silly one where Akanishi is pretending to kick Yamashita in one picture then has Yamashita molding Akanishi's smile from behind in another.

"I know that," Kame says gruffly. "They just piss me off."

"Because they're good?"

Kame frowns. "No. It just doesn't seem like they really care about things and they're just going about the motions."

"Or they make it look enjoyable because they're friends and know how to have fun, Kamenashi. Do you remember that?"

Kame glares at Koki. "I have fun doing my job. Professionally."

Koki snorts. "Yes, and that stick up your ass doesn't hinder you at all."

Kame sticks his tongue out. "It matches the one up your behind. At least mine isn't so obvious." Koki chucks the magazine in his hands at Kame--not that it was meant to hurt in any way, but the action was more than enough.

"Forget it," Kame snaps. "Whatever they do, it's none of my business, right?"

"Right."

--

Except Johnny comes up with a genius plan to try and get Yamashita and Akanishi's popularity off the charts. Since Kame and Koki are still technically the number one duo in the Jimusho--a position that Kame's starting to feel threatened in--Johnny figures what better way than to mix and match.

"For a month, Yamashita will be working with Kamenashi and Akanishi will be working with Tanaka for a series of shoots. Yamashita and Kamenashi will be shooting under the "boys next door" image while Akanishi and Tanaka will still stick to the usual "sexy" image that Tanaka and Kamenashi were doing previously," Johnny says from behind the desk.

Kame looks over at Yamashita, but the male gives nothing away--his eyes still focused on Johnny in front of him. "We'll be advertising you two as Seishun Amigo," Johnny says, gesturing towards Yamashita and Kame. "And you two are the Pinky group."

"Pinky?" Akanishi says incredulously. "Doesn't that sound kinda... just. Gay?"

Koki stomps on his foot, but Akanishi yelps, hopping up and down in front of Johnny's desk--looking ridiculous. Yamashita tugs on Akanishi's arm, steadying him and giving him a stern look that Kame completely misses. But judging from the arched eyebrow on Koki's face--who's standing next to Jin on his other side--Kame suspects it must've been a good one.

"Yes, you'll be called Pinky. You'll all be getting your next assignments in the morning, okay?"

Kame nods and he walks out of the room with a sign, leaning his head against the wall as the other three trickle out behind him.

"Pinky?" Kame hears Akanishi asking Yamashita. "Really? I like yours at least. Seishun Amigo. Spanish, huh?"

Yamashita sighs, and suddenly, Kame realizes how tired he looks--something that he hadn't noticed in the office. Or was that on purpose, he wonders. "Look, Jin. It's only temporary. Johnny wouldn't do something like this if it wouldn't go as he planned."

"But I don't want to work with anyone else," Akanishi whines. Koki snorts from beside Kame--Kame didn't even realize when he'd gotten there--and retorts, "Well, I don't want to work with you too, Princess." Kame gives Koki a crooked smile before they push off the wall together.

A hand grabs him at the crook of his elbow, stopping him in his tracks and Kame turns around to find Yamashita staring straight at him--eyes set. Focused. A look Kame was more than used to seeing. But usually on his own face than on other people--after all, hadn't Koki once joked that nobody was as hardworking as Kame?

"Look. I don't want to start out on bad terms. I don't mind working with you at all. It'll be an experience, that's for sure," Yamashita says, combing a hand through his hair. "Maybe we could talk later tonight. Get to know each other before we start shooting."

Kame can feel the scoff rising from his stomach, but he pushes it down and instead, to even his own surprise, says, "Sure. That sounds like a good idea." Kame doesn't even have to turn to his side to see Koki looking at him incredulously. He kinda feels like that too.

"Great," Yamashita breathes. "We can have dinner at my place. I'll make sure to kick Jin out."

"He can come to our place in exchange," Koki suddenly pipes up.

"Wait, what?" Akanishi hisses, ambling over to Yamashita's side and looking up with huge eyes that Kame can just imagine why he'd be good in photoshoots.

"It'll be a bonding experience, Jin. We can't always keep to ourselves," Yamashita hisses before nodding at Kame. "Then I'll see you at 7."

Kame gives him a curt nod before turning around and heading straight to the elevators.

"What was that all about?" Koki asks when the doors shut in front of them and Yamashita and Akanishi are still on the other side, talking to each other--and obviously, Akanishi doesn't look very happy.

"I don't know," Kame says, dropping his head to stare at the floor. "Sounded like a good idea at the time."

Koki snorts. "At the time. Now you have to go to dinner with the guy."

"Shut up. You do too, you know."

Pause. "Oh, fuck. Why did you let me do that?"

"Like I have any control over what you say or do."

Koki punches him on the shoulder. "Yeah, you do actually." Kame cracks a smile.

"Well, if I was going to have an awkward dinner, I thought you should too."

"Misery does love company," Koki snorts.

"Exactly."

--

They don't get along instantly--not Kame and Yamashita, but Koki and Akanishi. Not 5 minutes into their respective dinner appointments does Akanishi come storming back into the dorm room, curtly tells the two of them at the table to ignore him and that he was just going to go wallow in his own misery and then promptly walks straight into his room.

Kame, who was just about to take a bite, sighs and drops his fork. Yamashita gives him a grateful look before getting up from his chair. "You can take the food if you'd like. It'll go to waste if you don't eat it."

Kame shakes his head, getting up from his chair and is already halfway towards the door. "Don't worry about it, but thanks." He slips out the door before Yamashita can even say another word and is inside his dorm room with a glare fixed on Koki. "What the hell was that all about?"

"He had no intention of being friendly," Koki snaps, massaging his arm. "Just walked in here, said his greetings as nicely as he possibly could and then stormed out! I have no idea what's up with that guy."

Kame frowns. "Maybe he just doesn't like your facial hair."

Koki glares at Kame this time. "Just because you haven't been fond of it doesn't mean you have to project other peoples' thoughts to be like yours."

Kame shrugs, settling down at the table which has plates filled with all sorts of food that Kame knows Koki can cook. "You went all out, huh?"

"Shut up. I was being proper," Koki snaps, sitting in the chair opposite Kame's. "Might as well eat, huh?"

"Wouldn't want it to go to waste," Kame echoes--suddenly recalling Yamashita's comment to Kame. He wonders if they really did let the food go to waste, then ignores it in favor of the fish Koki had fried up.

--

Kame hates to admit it but Yamashita's good at what he does. Not as good as Kame yet, but time will only refine his skills. Only problem Kame can see is that Yamashita seems to have a hard time smiling at the camera unlike when they're off-camera.

"Seriously, just a quirk of the lips," Kame says with a sigh. "It shouldn't be so difficult. You do it easily when you're not on camera."

Yamashita shrugs. "It's easier when I don't have to pose so precisely."

"Isn't that how every photoshoot goes, Yamashita-kun?" Kame says in exasperation, almost throwing up his arms, but refraining because that would just be cliche.

"We try not to make our shoots seemed so posed, Kamenashi-kun. Because what's the fun in that?"

Kame blinks, stares at Yamashita for a second before exhaling through his nose. "Because our jobs are jobs."

"Said like a true professional," Yamashita comments, a twinge of a smile creeps up on his face and Kame is barely able to get his own fast enough before the flash blinds him. Yamashita leans in just as Kame's blinking away the lights, "Some people can combine work and pleasure." When he pulls back, Kame wonders what that was supposed to mean, but the smile's back on Yamashita's face and the photographer can't wait to snap more photos.

--

The next shoot goes something along the same lines--Kame trying to get Yamashita to smile and Yamashita throwing Kame off balance with weird comments on his work habits and his style, things that Kame barely let anyone joke about unless they were Koki. Except with Yamashita, Kame can't find it in him to be pissed about it or indignant or even a little bit offended. He's not. In fact, something about the way Yamashita works reminds Kame strangely of his own work habits--to the point that Koki groans on the couch with a pillow over his head, "Damn it, if you're going to fangirl him one more time, I am going to hit you with every pillow in existence. Or at least this dorm room."

Kame sticks his tongue out at Koki, but refrains from saying another word--at least not for the next twenty minutes. "But, you know, Yamashita can't smile. I just can't figure it out."

Koki groans again from underneath his pillow, muffled voice yelling, "JUST GO ACROSS THE HALL AND FUCK HIM AND GET IT OVER WITH."

"I don't want to screw him, asshole. He's just confusing."

"Yes, like Akanishi is, but you don't hear me harping," Koki snaps, finally sitting up.

"Really?" Kame asks curiously. "What's up with him anyway? You've been looking kinda tired lately."

Koki stares at Kame. "You got the easy one of the two, trust me." He doesn't say anything after that, just gets up and walks into his room, shutting the door behind him. Kame wonders what that was supposed to mean.

--

It's the fifth shoot that makes Kame nervous, because it's not with just anybody behind the camera, but it's Okada and Okada's pretty well-known within the Jimusho on being picky because he knows what to expect from the boys.

Kame's only worked with him twice before, and each time, Okada's smiled at him, but never said much of anything else to him--Kame's not sure where he stands with Okada really. (Minus an off-handed remark he'd overheard someone else say.) Not that he cares. ...Terribly.

Yamashita and Kame bow politely at Okada as he's checking his camera over, waving them to their position without looking up. "That's Okada-kun?" Yamashita asks in a hushed tone as Kame fiddles with the school uniform he has on. "I heard he was a popular model. He good with the camera?"

Kame nods. "Yeah. I guess after being a model, he knows exactly how they work."

Yamashita looks mildly impressed.

Which turns into hugely impressed after the shoot and Yamashita refuses to stop babbling about how Okada just seems to know what his models are capable of, what the right positions are, what will illicit the right expression on Kame's and Yamashita's faces. Kame listens to all of this with amusement, but excitement is bubbling up in his stomach just as much as it is in Yamashita's.

"He even complimented us," Yamashita says, a smile ridiculously plastered on his face.

"I wish you'd pull that look on you when we're actually shooting," Kame mentions off-handedly as he's switching out of the school uniform; he usually likes to just walk out in whatever he's modeling for the day (which makes for a large closet) but he doesn't think going out in a uniform would do much for him.

Yamashita eyes his smile in the mirror hanging in the locker before shrugging. "Maybe next time, just mention Okada-kun to me and I'll cheer right up, Kamenashi-kun."

Kame laughs, shaking his head as he shuts the locker door, leaning against the metal lockers to face Yamashita who's just pulling on his jewelry. "I'll make sure to keep that in mind." He pauses for a second, before saying with a butterflies of anxiety in his stomach. "By the way." Yamashita makes a noise of hearing Kame, although his attention is preoccupied with the mirror in front of him and the fluffing of his hair. "You can call me Kame, you know."

Yamashita freezes, looks away from the mirror and straight at Kame before saying, "Kame?"

Kame nods, suddenly feeling awkward. "Well, I mean. It's a nickname. That's what everyone usually calls me. Less of a mouthful than Kamenashi-kun or whatever, so I thought it'd help and--"

"And you can call me Yamapi," Yamashita interrupts to Kame's glee; he wasn't sure where he was going with that train of thought anyway.

"Yamapi?" Kame asks. "I get Yama, but pi?"

Yamashita--Yamapi--starts to flush around the cheeks, startling Kame out of that thought when he slams the locker door. "Takki gave it to me when I was younger. I might... I was... I liked the color pink back then. It was stupid."

Kame snickers as they walk out of the room. "Wow. And now you're stuck remembering it forever."

"Shut up, Kamenashi," Yamapi snipes as he throws on his sunglasses.

"Does that mean if someone's trying to be more formal they'd go, Yamashita Pink?" Kame asks, jogging to catch up to Yamapi's quick pace.

Yamapi groans. "I knew I shouldn't have explained."

"Probably not," Kame says, a stupid grin on his face.

He has it on for the rest of the day, to the point that Koki throws a pillow at him when they're home, telling him that he's creepy. Kame gloats that it's just because Koki's jealous that Kame and Yamapi are getting along.

"Don't worry," Kame smirks, tugging Koki into a tight hug which Koki only reluctantly allows. "I'll never break up our pair."

Koki rolls his eyes. "You're stupid."

Kame only grins.

--

Kame's shoots aren't entirely interesting, mainly because they're supposed to be the "boys next door," or again, as Koki calls it, "the boys you take home to your mom and lie that you're dating just so you can date that guy in the bar without anyone knowing."

He finds out two weeks later that Koki and Akanishi's shoots are anything but tame. Of course it's common for them to wear make-up, a necessity in this field of work. But when Kame finds Koki stumbling through the door, red lipstick and shiny silver eye shadow, Kame's a little worried. And confused.

"So how was work today?"

"Tiring," Koki groans from the couch, already situated in his usual sprawled out position.

"Why do you always seem so exhausted?"

"Because Akanishi is like a bundle of fucking energy that likes to release it all in the middle of a damn shoot. How Yamashita was able to deal with him, I'll never know."

"Mm," Kame says nonchalantly, pouring a cup of coffee for Koki--adding a sugar and two milks--and placing it on the table in front of the couch.

Koki opens his eyes long enough to see the cup and murmurs a deep "Thank you" in gratitude. He starts to take a sip.

"So what's with the lipstick?"

Koki nearly spits out the coffee in his surprise before rounding a glare at Kame.

Kame is already laughing. "That was funnier than I thought it would be."

"Yamashita is a bad influence on you," Koki snaps, finally taking a quick sip of the coffee, blowing on it first though--even though that doesn't seem to help cool it down off the pained look on Koki's face.

"You're just mad because like you said, I got the easier of the two," Kame retorts, gulping down some water.

Koki goes silent before sighing. "Okay, Akanishi's not bad. He's just really active. I can't keep up every second, honestly. Plus he has his own ideas and like to throw them at the photographer." Koki physically winces, like he's remembering. "The first time it happened, I could've sworn Okada-kun was going to throttle him."

Kame's eyes go wide. "He did this to Okada-kun?"

"Yeah, I know, ballsy. But Okada was okay with it. A little surprised, but he thought Jin's--Akanishi's ideas were good."

Kame bites back a smile, which only turns it into a half smirk. "Jin?"

"Shut up. If you can get buddy-buddy with your partner, I can too."

Kame laughs. "Maybe this was good for both of us."

Pause. Koki smiles at Kame. "Yeah, maybe it was."

"Not that I'm going to forget, by the way. What's up with the make-up?"

Koki groans before launching into the shoot of the day. "And they had me dressed as a girl with these high heels. Jin was fucking ecstatic to the point that I thought he might've just suggested the damn idea. I swear he kept groping me." Kame cracks up anew.

--

The month is gone before Kame realizes and he finds himself a little saddened at the thought that they're actually done and while he loves working with Koki, he'd developed some sort of friendship with Yamapi--he doesn't have to try to make Yamapi smile for shoots anymore. It just happens naturally.

For their last shoot ever as separate pairings, Johnny arranges for them to have five pages to themselves--first two are of the swapped pairings.

Kame and Yamapi end up in casual jeans, Yamapi in this leather jacket while Kame wears this jeans one that's a little more bejeweled than he'd like but otherwise looks kinda cool. They even use Yamapi's usual sunglasses as a prop for it and they shoot outdoors.

"Are you going to miss this?" Yamapi asks as they round a corner, the camera snapping away in front of them.

Kame glances at Yamapi, smiles and nods. "Yeah. I think I will."

Yamapi turns to look at Kame at that exact moment, a smile gracing his face. Instantly, the camera clicks and they finish their location shooting. Akanishi and Koki stay at the studio, and since Kame and Yamapi finish a little early (and already changed), they manage to come in just as the two are finishing up.

To Kame's immense glee, Koki's dressed as a girl again, blonde wig over his head with curls that stop right at his shoulders, not that it matters when Akanishi's hovering over him, a fedora tilted to the side of his head--only really showing one side of Akanishi's face as he looks up at the camera.

Koki's make-up and wig and the dress with the pointy black heels that are dangling off his feet as he lies down on a bed sheeted in white--a complete contrast to the dark reds and blacks that the two are wearing--his shoes only held on by the straps around his ankles actually help Koki look more and more like a girl. Kame's almost convinced until Koki hisses at Akanishi to "stop fidgeting because the damn garter is rising up his thigh and frills are not exactly comfortable."

Kame and Yamapi both can't hold back their laughter as they look on. Koki hears them in a second and while he can't lift up his head to check, Kame's loud "We should make you dress as a girl more often, Tanaka" is more than enough assurance.

"Shit!" Koki hisses as Akanishi looks down curiously. "I didn't think they'd be back so soon." Akanishi laughs, leaning in to lightly press lips against Koki's cheek, his other hand lingering at Koki's left thigh, edging up.

Yamapi whistles. "Jin's really into this shoot."

"How could you tell? The groping or the kissing," Kame snorts.

Yamapi turns to Kame with a smile. "The look in his eyes. He's practically smoldering. It's not easy to get him that into something, even if he's hyperactive sometimes."

Kame stares. "Maybe."

Akanishi takes one long look at the camera, Koki throws his arms around Akanishi's neck and leans up, relying on the other's strength to keep him steady--they succeed and the photographer cooes at them for their amazing work and putting in all that feeling.

Kame chuckles as he approaches Koki, tugging on one of the blonde curls. "Man, this was a good idea. You look good as a girl."

Koki glares. "We are not to speak of this ever again."

"But you look so good," Kame whines. "Why waste a chance?"

"Then you dress like a girl!" Koki hisses, walking off set to get changed for their next shoot. Kame chuckles before glancing over at Yamapi and Akanishi who are doing some stupid handshake that ends with half a heart pounded against the chest before Akanishi rushes off to the changing room.

"Handshake?" Kame asks when Yamapi walks up and they start getting into position for the four person shoot.

"Yeah. Stupid thing we came up with as kids," he says with a laugh. "We just haven't broken out of the habit."

"It's nice. Having a friend thing for all these years."

Yamapi pauses before laughing. "Yeah, it kind of is."

The four person shoot isn't anything special--they're all wearing something casual: jeans, t-shirt, sneakers. Yamapi's sunglasses are clipped to the front of his shirt while Koki gets to throw on a cap over his head. They're not doing anything special, just sitting on these two huge cubes--or at least Kame and Yamapi are, Koki takes the floor while Akanishi sits right behind them, throwing his arms over Kame and Yamapi's shoulders.

Kame thinks it's the most realistic shoot he's ever had.

For the last two pages, it's them in their normal pairings. Kame and Koki wear these tuxedos, bouquets in their hands as though they're about to present it, while Yamapi and Akanishi dress in these ridiculous feathery and sparkly costumes that are only appropriate for idols as they hold microphones and pretend to serenade the camera, or at least that's what Kame figures.

As they're leaving the set, Kame sighs, leaning against Koki's shoulder. "This was a good experiment, don't you think?"

Koki grins. "Would you like to do it again?"

"Maybe. But not now. It's been too long since we've worked together. I think we should do that first."

Koki cracks up. "You're such mush. I can't believe this is you opening up. Where's that stick again?"

"Ugh. You suck. I was being nice and sentimental. See if I ever do that again."

"Like you can resist," Koki jokes.

Yamapi drapes an arm over Kame's shoulders suddenly, leaning in happily. "Let's grab dinner, guys. Celebrate!"

"I swear this was Johnny's master plan to get us slowly integrated into the Jimusho than to boost our popularity," Akanishi comments with a wrinkle of his nose. "I mean, why pair us up with you guys after all?" The other three pause before Akanishi looks up at them. "What?"

Kame laughs. "Nothing, Akanishi."

"Jin," Jin comments. "You don't have to call me Akanishi."

Kame starts then smiles. "Okay. And I'm Kame."

"Awww, look. Another budding friendship," Koki jokes. Yamapi laughs before shaking his head.

"Maybe this was Johnny's ultimate plan. If it is, that bastard's smarter than I ever thought he was."

Kame shrugs just as Jin says, "I don't care. Let's just get dinner."

Kame laughs then chimes in to agree.

Adjusting - Massu/Ryo [PG]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 09:53:29 GMT

Adjusting
tinyangl, 4909 words
Massu/Ryo. Massu can't really figure out what to do with NewS over. He still has Tegomass, but something still doesn't feel right. He ends up going to Osaka for a weekend and discovering more than one answer.
A/N: Written for kaychung for my holiday meme! I blame cynicalism for the plot. You guys should too. XD

Massu opens his eyes and he suddenly feels the weight of both the microphone in his hands--which has started to slip from all his sweat--and the one on his shoulders as he looks out on the crowd. It's been 15 years since they debuted, 16 depending on who you asked--to NewS, it's their 16th; the hiatus having meant nothing other than pausing a little in group activities, they're still NewS.

Or at least they were NewS.

Koyama's talking, but Massu's drowned him out, squinting at all the people with raised penlights and uchiwas which undoubtedly have his smile--his trademark smile that every fan seems to know him as having--uchiwas that will no longer have the name NewS behind it but a sole Tegomass.

At least that's what is awaiting them at the end of Countdown.

They're hosting Countdown for the 3rd time--the last time ever and Massu can feel the minutes slowly trickle down--30 minutes left, 20, 10. 5.

"With the end of Countdown coming, NewS has something to announce," Koyama starts and that's when Massu feels his stomach plummet. He had managed well enough for the entire concert earlier that day. And every other medley and performance throughout Countdown. Beside him, Ryo grabs his hand and squeezes, and Massu can't bring himself to look at Ryo in thanks. Instead, he looks out at the crowd who have become startlingly still.

Then they scream, "EH!?" in voices so loud that it echoes in his ears for days and days to come.

That's when Massu knows that Koyama's probably told everyone. His body moves without him knowing and he raises the microphone to his mouth and sings with the rest of NewS.

Hoshi wo Mezashite. He thinks that Julie was being particularly ironic in telling them that's what they'd close the show with.

Massu shuts his eyes, squeezes them while he belts out the lyrics--lyrics that are being twisted around and he can feel his heart constrict, his eyes start to fill with tears and he swears he can hear Koyama breaking out of the song to brush away tears.

Ryo's hand has never left his and when they finish, Massu looks over grateful to see that Ryo's eyes are red--but no streaks of tears on his face and Massu wonders if he'd done the same thing Massu had.

Koyama's talking again, not that anyone else cares because nobody can speak right now--not a single one of them. And Massu tightens his grip on Ryo before they raise their hands up and scream to the crowd for the last time. "We are NewS!"

With that, Massu feels like he's waking up from a very long, very satisfying dream.

Ryo doesn't let go of his hand till they reach the dressing room.

--

They break up because Julie thinks she'll get more revenue if they're apart--Koyama stays as an MC for multiple variety shows, Yamapi is, of course, first and foremost an actor, but he has solo jobs lined up before him, Shige also stays as an actor (surprisingly) although Massu suspects he works a lot more in the Jimusho's legal department, Ryo stays with Kanjani8--who is still a unit (even though there are rumors that it won't stick for too much longer). And Tegomass stay as a permanent unit, becoming their first priority. Like Tegomass could serve as a replacement for NewS.

Massu thinks Julie's only joking herself--with her in command after Johnny's death and Mary's retirement, it's only a matter of time before the Jimusho'll run itself to the ground. From ideas like splitting up groups to debuting a group of the worst troublemakers in Johnny's Jrs and eliminating a lot of the tie-ins that many of the boys worked their asses off to get and to keep. Massu's not sure where all the money's coming from--if there even is any.

A part of him wishes he'd quit already--that this isn't what he wants anymore, not when everyone's broken up and what he'd been working towards, at, with is completely out of his sight.

Tegoshi's excited though, but he's always been prone to being optimistic, going towards everything head-on. Something Massu feels he's lost somewhere along the way after becoming settled as Massu of NewS.

Massu exhales before the choreographer snaps at him to pay attention and to do it again. He ignores the worried look in Tegoshi's eyes staring at him through the reflection on the mirrors.

--

Tegoshi tries to ask Massu what's the matter repeatedly in the next few days that follow.

"Really," Massu says exasperatedly, almost tired of saying the word itself. "I'm fine, Tegoshi."

"But you've been looking kinda tired. And you never look tired," Tegoshi insists, frowning--it's weird that even 10 years later, Tegoshi is still pretty much the same--still good at manipulating people with that pout of his.

Massu chuckles, almost feeling like he should reach out and ruffle Tegoshi's hair--but he resists, of course--and shakes his head. "I'm not tired at all!" He pumps up his fists in the air like it'll show how energetic he is.

Tegoshi seems to accept it, but not before giving Massu a dubious look then grinning. "Okay! If Massu says so, then I'll believe him."

Massu waits until Tegoshi leaves the room before letting out a sigh of relief and letting himself think the one thing he'd wanted, but didn't out of fear that Tegoshi could somehow read his mind--some things really didn't change.

But other things did. Things could change. Massu did, after all.

Tegoshi comes back into the room and Massu puts on his happy smile again, practicing their newest routine all over again for the fifth time that day.

--

Massu finds himself on a solo trip--going away during one of his free moments because he feels like he needs it. He only tells Tegoshi an hour before his train is leaving and although Tegoshi's a little incensed that Massu would be leaving him behind without a single word, Massu insists that it's only for the weekend and he needs some time to get over what happened at Countdown.

Tegoshi's voice goes soft as he tells Massu to take care of himself and that he'll see Massu bright and early on Monday--that gives Massu three days to figure out for himself what he wants, what he can do.

Massu nods before realizing that Tegoshi can't really see him. "Yeah, I'll see you Monday then."

"Do you know where you're going?" Tegoshi asks abruptly, right when Massu's about to say bye.

Massu looks up at the train map before shaking his head and then laughing again because Tegoshi can't see him. Tegoshi laughs on the other end. "Did you nod or something?"

"Yeah," Massu laughs. "I shook my head. I don't know. Wherever I feel like, I guess?"

Tegoshi laughs. "Bring souvenirs back for me then!"

"Of course. You'd kill me if I didn't."

"Well, not kill. Maybe be angry at for a minute or two before I bribed, I mean, convinced you to take me to dinner," Tegoshi jokes before breaking out into laughter.

Massu takes a moment to remember the sound before laughing himself. "I'm glad you already have your alternative plan."

"Gotta be ready after all. Anyway, you should probably get going. Your train to Never Neverland should be leaving soon."

Massu blinks. "Never Neverland?"

Tegoshi chuckles on the other end. "Never mind. Safe trip, okay?"

Massu nods again before hanging up, and then laughing because he did it again.

--

Before he knows it, Massu arrives in Osaka--he's not sure how he managed to blank out about 3 or so hours of travel time, but all that matters is that he's here. On second thought, he realizes that what matters more is what he's doing there and what he's going to do there.

Or really, why is he in Osaka to begin with?

Massu opens up his cell phone and is calling Ryo, his number already on speed-dial after all these years--the other four members are on the other numbers (Ryo's stolen number 3--saying it's for his birthday). Massu listens to the phone ring on the other end and for a second there, he panics, wondering if he could possibly be disturbing Ryo or what if Ryo's in the middle of a shoot, or recording, or--"Masuda?"

Massu stares in front of him blankly, not really thinking of a thing he could possibly say at this moment.

"Massu. You need to speak up if you're there," Ryo says, a little louder than before.

Massu still can't find the right words.

"Massu? Where are you? Are you underground again? You know connection isn't that great--"

"I'm sorry," Massu blurts out, cradling his phone and moving towards the exit of the station. "I--er. This must be a bad time. I didn't. Er."

"Massu, where are you?" Ryo interrupts, almost demanding. "Tegoshi called earlier saying that you were going on a trip. Why are you calling me?"

Massu steps outside the doors, stares at the cabs lining the curb and then inhales. "I'm in Osaka," he ends up saying simply.

There's a pause on the other line before Massu can hear the rustling of wind and the jingling of keys. "Shin-Osaka station, right? I'll be there as soon as I can, don't move."

"Nishikido-kun," Massu says helplessly, leaning against the wall behind him, his bag by his feet. "I can just take a cab. I think I can remember your address and--"

"Don't. Move."

Massu nods mutely before the dial tone meets his ears. He swallows then wonders once again why he's in Osaka. For a second, his mind flashes to Countdown and the feel of Ryo clutching onto him and Massu gripping back, and Massu sighs.

--

Ryo arrives sooner than later--not that Massu notices, lost in his thoughts again. He thinks he has to start keeping track of his time better not to lose so many chunks in between like he is--time was and always is precious, after all.

"Hey," Ryo greets, bending down to grab Massu's bag. "Sorry, I would've been here sooner, but got caught in traffic."

Massu shakes his head, glancing at his watch realizing that it's been about an hour and a half since his phone call. He smiles. "I didn't even notice," he says.

Ryo raises an eyebrow before shaking his head. "Get in," he tells Massu, moving into the driver's seat. Massu enters Ryo's car, nervous as his hands shake when he tries to put on his seat belt. Ryo looks over and laughs. "It's only me," Ryo says, reaching over to help Massu--Ryo's hands are on Massu's and they hear the click of the seat belt locking into place. "I won't have to take care of you like this all weekend, will I?" He presses on gas and the car moves out of the circle, leaving the station behind.

Massu shakes his head again, turning to look at Ryo. "No, you're probably busy. I'm really sorry to intrude--I--"

"Massu, I have the weekend off, so stop worrying." Ryo stops at a red light and turns to Massu. "I don't know why you decided to come to Osaka and visit all of a sudden, but don't worry about time."

"Are you sure? I mean, I can handle--"

"Masuda," Ryo says firmly. "This weekend's yours." He turns back to the road and Massu exhales. He puts on a smile--one that comes close to the kind he used to have before he got the news--close, but nowhere near at the same time.

"Thanks," Massu says. "I really appreciate this."

"You'd better," Ryo jokes. "Not everyone gets private time with Nishikido Ryo."

Massu chuckles before turning to look out his side window. He misses Ryo's worried look in his direction.

--

Day 1:

Since Massu had arrived pretty late and the drive back didn't help matters--they got stuck in traffic again--Ryo opts for dinner at the apartment. "I can cook," Ryo says confidently as he starts pulling out pots and the cutting board, as well as all the ingredients necessary for nabe--something good for the two of them.

"Let me help out," Massu says, putting down his bag right by the couch and moving towards behind the counter. Ryo stares him down and Massu slowly backs away. "Or not..." he mutters to himself.

Ryo grins--almost wickedly if Massu looks at the right angle, which he was. "You're my guest. I'll be cooking--at least for tonight anyway."

Massu laughs before he gets a good look at the pots--they're old, worn, and Massu recognizes them in an instant. "Aren't those the ones from Christmas?" Massu asks, eyebrows furrowed.

There's a flush over Ryo's cheeks before he abruptly turns around with the pot, heading straight for the sink: water turning on a second later. Massu doesn't need words; he already knows that he's right--they were the kitchen utensils Shige had given Ryo practically 10 years ago. Massu can't stop the bubble of happiness that spreads in his stomach.

Ryo turns back around and puts the pot down on the stove. "On second thought, I'm letting you stay here for free. I might as well get some free labor too."

Massu laughs before moving around to start chopping the vegetables.

--

"So why'd you come to Osaka?" Ryo asks when they're cleaning up the table after dinner.

Massu wipes mindlessly at the dish he's holding, shrugging. "I don't know," he says honestly. "Hopped on a train and suddenly found myself in Osaka."

Ryo laughs. "Don't lie. You've missed me and couldn't wait to see me on your weekend off." He leans against the sink, arms crossed and eyes on Massu.

Massu can't meet Ryo's eyes, but he laughs with ease, putting the plate in the cabinet it's assigned to. "You said it too soon, Nishikido-kun." He finally turns to Ryo, laughing. "You're supposed to say that at the end of the weekend and we're supposed to find true love that way."

Ryo bursts into laughter, clapping a hand on Massu's back. "Wanna watch a movie before we turn in?"

Massu shakes his head. "I think I'm a little sleepy from all the traveling. I hope you don't mind me going to bed early."

"No, it's no problem. The guest bedroom's down the hallway, first door to the right." Massu nods, moving around the counter to grab his back and walking down the hallway, grabbing the first doorknob he sees.

Massu blinks when all he sees are cleaning supplies that don't look like they've been touched in a while.

"To the right," Ryo laughs from the entrance of the hallway, only a few feet away. Massu blinks again, realizing he's on the wrong side before laughing awkwardly and turning the doorknob behind him. There, there's an actual bed and cabinets and everything he probably would need.

Ryo's behind him, just breathing and Massu feels strangely unsteady. "I hope this is okay. I haven't really used it for a while so I don't know how clean it might be."

Massu laughs, flicking on the light switch. "It's no problem. I drop by unannounced after all."

"Which is also no problem," Ryo insists.

"Yeah. Thanks again for that," Massu says, plopping himself onto the bed stomach first. Ryo chuckles from the doorway.

"No problem," he says, shutting the door for Massu.

Massu exhales and a sheet of dust rises from the bed. Massu wrinkles his nose before getting up and airing out the sheets. As he does so, Massu wonders how long he can really stay at Ryo's before he comes to terms with everything. He bites his bottom lip before focusing on just getting to sleep.

--

Day Two:

Massu's already awake and eating breakfast by the time Ryo wakes up--at six--to make breakfast.

Except it's already made. Massu grins, gesturing for Ryo to join him before pouring him a cup of coffee--black, because Ryo would rather focus on the fact that the coffee's supposed to wake someone up than on its flavor. "I thought I'd make you breakfast since you made me dinner."

Ryo shakes his head, still looking tired. "You shouldn't have, Massu."

"It's only right," Massu says gently, staring down at his glass of orange juice. "I don't mind it. I was already up anyway."

Ryo blinks. "Already? How long have you been up?"

Massu gives him a bright smile. "I think I'm going to get ready. You should eat up!" He bounces out of his chair and walks to his room, humming. He wonders how long till Ryo realizes that really, Massu just hadn't slept that night.

--

Ryo takes Massu to so many places that Massu's not even sure he remembers where he was maybe five minutes ago. Ryo doesn't take Massu to any of the normal tourist attractions--they'll always be there, Ryo argues. No, he takes Massu to more personal places. His favorite ramen-ya, his favorite place to go shopping--they unfortunately don't spend any time there, Ryo insisting they leave immediately; Massu pouts but it doesn't work. ("That only works when Tegoshi does it.") They go to his favorite park. His favorite cafe--his favorite something or another. His school.

Ryo's favorite park is right across the street from Ryo's elementary school and Massu swings back and forth on the swing--temporarily forgetting that he's 32 already and a grown man shouldn't really be riding in swings as freely as he is--but it helps him to forget.

"Isn't it kinda pedo of you to come here and stare at the kids?" Massu asks, bluntly. His eyes go wide as he realizes that he actually said that out loud.

Ryo laughs though, arms crossed as he leans against the handrail in front of the swings, just watching Massu go back and forth, and back and forth. "No, because I never stare at the kids."

Massu drags his feet on the sand, coming to a slow stop. "I'm really sorry," he says, teeth nipping at his lower lip. "I didn't--"

"Masuda, I can take a joke, you know. I'm not going to banish you or something." Ryo pushes off the handrail, hovering over Massu as he grips onto the chains of the swings. Massu thinks if he just leans a little forward, he could--

"I know that, Nishikido-kun," Massu says, leaning backwards to get a better angle towards Ryo's face. "Er. I just feel--"

"Ryo. We've been in a group for how many years and you're still calling me Nishikido-kun?"

Massu pauses. "Habit?"

Ryo laughs, pulling back and shaking his head. "I have a rule then. You have to call me Ryo for the next two days. No Nishikido-kun, no Ryo-kun, Ryo-sama. ...Although I might not mind the last too much. But just. Ryo. My name."

The edges of Massu's lips spread on his face without Massu actually realizing it. "Okay. I. Er. I think I can do that. Ni--Ryo."

Ryo returns Massu's grin. "I think that's the first I've seen you smile all weekend."

Massu blinks, hands on his face before flushing. "Er."

"Oh, you're not going to go all weird on me, are you?" Ryo snaps, wrinkling his nose. "Okay, let's just go." He reaches over and grabs Massu's hand, gripping tightly as he leads Massu deeper into the park--Massu swears if he closes his eyes, he can almost hear the crowds.

But he doesn't. Instead, he keeps his eyes open and fixed on Ryo as he wonders where Ryo's taking him--and what is going on inside his own head really.

--

Ryo ends up taking Massu to the other end of the park, exiting and then making a sharp right turn and straight into a ramen-ya. "Wait, another one? Didn't we just--" Ryo makes a loud shushing noise before entering.

The lady behind the counter halts her Irreshai with a "ugh" before moving around the counter and leading Ryo towards a booth. "God, don't you come here eno--" She starts before she catches sight of Massu standing behind Ryo, looking confused. "Wait, who is--"

Ryo gets a second's warning to cover his ears with his hands before the lady immediately squeaks, drops the menus she was holding and grasping Massu's hands in hers. "Oh! Masuda Takahisa-kun, right?!"

Massu blinks back in surprise. "Er, yes?"

"Can I get your signature?!" Massu looks past the girl's shoulder towards Ryo who nods at Massu before Massu can say that it's okay. "Great!" she says, rushing behind the counter to grab a notepad and pen and hands it to Massu. "Just anything would be great!"

Massu nods, drawing a pig off the bat--it's what he's used to after all and it looks almost the right size of the autograph boards--before scribbling his signature underneath it and handing it back. "Thank you!" she says excitedly before Massu turns to Ryo who's already sitting down in one of the booths, browsing through a menu. Massu joins him, sliding into the booth across from Ryo.

The lady joins them again, ready to take their order. But Ryo snorts without looking up from his menu. "You ask him for his autograph but not me? I'm here all the time."

"That's why I don't ask," she snorts back. "I have to see your ugly mug every day as it is."

Massu stares, wide-eyed and moving from Ryo to the lady then back to Ryo. Ryo finally snaps his attention away from the menu. "Shut up, old hag!"

The lady smacks Ryo over the head. "Hey! Watch what you call your older sister."

"Older sister?" Massu croaks out, eyes still wide.

"Unfortunately."

"This is your shop?" Massu asks, mouth open as he looks around.

Ryo's sister grins at him. "Yeah. It's my husband's really. By the way, your meal's on the house."

"Hey! What about me?" Ryo snaps.

"Like you ever pay, cheap-skate. Where's all this idol money?"

Massu laughs hard off the glare on Ryo's face. "What are you laughing at, pig?"

"At the cheap-skate in front of me," Massu says with ease. Ryo's glare hardens, but Ryo's sister's grin widens.

"And that'll be dessert too."

Massu grins hard as Ryo argues with his sister that he should be getting dessert too--"No way! You don't treat the owner of the place with respect."

"What? And degrade myself?" Ryo gets a pinch on the cheek and another smack across the head for that remark.

Massu finds himself laughing for the entire night.

When they get back to the apartment, Massu's so wiped out that he practically stumbles his way to his room.

"Your sister's really nice," he says sleepily, leaning against his doorway as Ryo passes.

"Maybe to you," Ryo snorts, facing Massu with a sleepy smile. "I'll see you in the morning?"

Massu nods. Ryo turns and heads back to his room, but Massu blurts out, "You're really used to living here, huh?"

Ryo stops in his tracks and turns around slowly. He tilts his head to the side before smiling softly. "It takes some time."

Massu nods and goes back into his room, not really sure why he'd made that comment. He shakes his head and pushes it out of his head. He finds that he's so tired that he doesn't even have to think on how he'll be able to sleep--his routine for the past couple of nights. He just does.

--

Day Three:

Massu doesn't wake up early, which is a surprise to him and to Ryo who greets him in the kitchen, already eating breakfast and reading the newspaper. Massu rubs at his eyes and tries to read the clock with only one eye, squinting. "It's noon already?" Massu asks, yawning. "Why'd you let me sleep?"

"Because you needed it," Ryo says simply, taking another sip of his coffee.

Massu doesn't think he wants to continue with that line of thought so he lets it go. "Are we doing anything today?"

Ryo shakes his head. "I think your train leaves at about 5, so I thought we'd just stay in. Relax a little."

"Sounds good," Massu manages in a yawn.

"Or you could sleep more."

Massu shakes his head vigorously. "I'm only here for this weekend. I'm not going to waste it sleeping."

Ryo chuckles before flipping the next page of his newspaper.

Massu packs before he settles down on the couch next to Ryo. He kinda feels like a teenage girl or something, with his lower half spread out on the couch, a blanket covering him and he's leaning against Ryo--Ryo doesn't seem to mind though, arm leaning against the arm rest as they watch some movie that Massu completely missed the beginning 20 minutes of because he's so distracted thinking of how weird it must look for two 30+ year old men to be sitting on a couch together while the other one just thinks on and on about how strange this is.

Ryo's hand finds his under the covers and Massu relaxes as Ryo just holds on tight, his attention never wavering from the movie in front of them. Massu lets out a soft sigh.

Massu is asleep before the first action scene even plays.

--

Ryo is shaking him awake with a smile on his face. "You fell asleep."

Massu jerks off the couch, almost hitting Ryo in the forehead. "What? What. Did I miss anything? Why did you let me sleep?" he thinks he's whining--is almost sure he's whining from the strange look on Ryo's face.

"Because you needed it, idiot. Come on. I'll drive you to the station."

Massu frowns but he does as he's told--throwing the blanket off him and then when he stands up, automatically moving to fold it.

"You don't have to do that," Ryo says from around the other couch. "I can do it when I get home."

"It's only right," Massu says firmly. Ryo lets out a sigh of aggravation but Massu lets it go. He finally moves when he places the neatly folded blanket on top of the pillow he'd been sleeping on--wait, pillow?

Massu doesn't think on that. Instead, he follows Ryo, his stomach plunging as he thinks of going back home--or just going back. Of leaving when all he's felt when he's been here is that this is good for him. Being around, with Ryo has been good for him.

Massu thinks it's the last point that really sticks with him. The drive to the station is filled with silence as Massu tries to piece together his own thoughts--thoughts that bubble to the surface as he realizes that, shit, he went away a weekend to find answers, but didn't really. Not completely.

That, shit, he really was a little lost without NewS. That they'd taken up so much of his life that working away from them felt weird and even though Tegoshi was Tegoshi and Massu had always worked with him, there was something about the dynamic that Massu was longing for. But it would be okay. They'd adjust, because that's what happens with change--time helps a person adjust, after all. Breaking up didn't necessarily mean an ending--they were still a group, whether the Jimusho recognized them or not. They had a history--things and memories couldn't just be so easily replaced. And that, even at 32, Massu still had a lot of growing up left ahead of him.

And lastly, that, shit, he thinks he's in love with Ryo because Ryo pushes him away and pulls him towards Ryo all at the same time. He lets Massu think things over himself, but takes care of him without being obvious or annoying about it.

Massu becomes acutely aware of Ryo's glances in his direction at every stop light.

"What?" Massu finally asks after the 7th, no, maybe 8th, glance over.

"Are you going to be okay going back? You could always stay a little longer. Take a longer vacation," Ryo suggests, his eyes on the road, but Massu thinks if he could see Ryo's face, it'd be filled with worry and care.

Massu wants to say yes, because he'd love to stay longer. Love to see the rest of Ryo's family and see if they are all as lovingly abusive towards each other as Ryo is with everyone--like the NewS members. Love to actually get some sleep without having to worry about what's going to happen the next day. But Massu shakes his head, smiling. "No. I have someone waiting for me, but maybe next time?"

Ryo pulls into an empty spot in front of the station and turns to Massu with a smile. "Yeah. Definitely, my place is always open to you."

With a grin on his face--authentic and bright, like he's back to old times--Massu steps out of the car, grabbing his bag from the back seat. Before he shuts the passenger door though, Massu leans back in and says, "Thanks for everything. Ryo."

The smile on Ryo's face is unmistakable and the sight makes Massu think he really needs to keep his self-restraint in line a little more. "No problem."

Massu turns on his heel and heads straight for his train. He wouldn't want to miss practice the next morning.

--

Massu gets into practice right on time, a smile on his face--not forced, but just naturally there--and Tegoshi is already inside, running through their routine lightly.

Tegoshi turns to Massu with a smile. "Massu!" he says cheerfully, practically running over. "How was Osaka? Ryo-tan told me you went to go visit him. Was it fun? If I had known you were just going to Osaka, I would've joined you!"

Massu chuckles, pulling out a box of some kind of snack from his bag. "Maybe next time, Tegoshi."

"Un! I think it'd be fun visiting, Ryo-tan. And thanks, Massu!"

"Well, I wasn't about to pay for dinner."

"Ehhhhh. Really? I was hoping--" Tegoshi starts, jokingly.

Massu laughs. "Okay, maybe then." Tegoshi lights up and Massu grins widely at that.

Tegoshi stares at Massu curious which has him touching his face in sudden panic. "What? Is something--"

"You look happier, Massu."

Massu blinks, slightly started. "Er. Thanks."

"This was a good trip for you, wasn't it?"

"Yeah," Massu says a second later. "It really was."

Omake:

There's a knock on Massu's door at around 8 in the morning and it's one of Massu's rare days off ever since he's started filming for his drama. He stumbles towards the door and throws it open without really paying attention to who it is through the peephole.

Ryo's smile greets him. "Mind if I crash here for a week?"

Routine - Koyama/Ueda [PG]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 09:46:38 GMT

Routine
tinyangl, 3670 words
Koyama/Ueda. Ueda's a regular customer at Koyama's cafe, to the point that Koyama starts to wonder about Ueda--feeling pulled in by this guest that never seems to speak.
A/N: Written for kriszeth for my holiday meme! Slight AU. Ueda is still part of Johnny's, but Koyama (and Shige) aren't.

Koyama always sees him--in the same place, at the same time, with the same order, always staying until closing. (Which he makes up for by tipping big.) It's not that Koyama's usually curious about the people that would frequent the coffee shop, but there's something about that one person that just draws Koyama's attention to him.

He doesn't know him--not really. As much as anyone could know an idol. And Koyama only knows he's an idol because he recognizes him, startlingly so--one of those Johnny's idols that tend to litter the advertisements around the shop, around the train station, hell, around Japan. He's almost positive that he's even one of the ones his sister fancies just a little bit--Ueda, Koyama thinks is his name--he never actually bothered to learn much else.

Koyama's always his server, not surprising when Ueda uses the same table every single time.

"Here you go," Koyama says politely, placing Ueda's cup of tea in front of him. Ueda never looks at him, never turns away from the window--just continues to stare out with this pensive, almost lonely look on his face that Koyama doesn't really know how to read. Sometimes, only sometimes does Koyama want to interrupt, want to talk to Ueda and ask him what he's doing, how his day has been or just, how are you.

But even though Ueda comes late at night when there are very little customers and really, what else should Koyama do other than stand behind the counter and blow the hair out of his eyes, but Koyama never does. Because he knows when someone needs their private time and Koyama can tell that this is exactly that. Ueda's private time.

Koyama only wishes he'd stop looking so sad and miserable.

--

It's weird when he sees Ueda--he's still not sure that's even his name--just sitting there, night after night. He doesn't even bring a book with him, or a music player to pass the time. More than once, Koyama wonders if he's spying on someone out the window. If there's someone out there that has the same routine Ueda does--Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays, 9 P.M. till whenever closing happens to be that day.

Koyama wants to know his story, his background even.

"You shouldn't be so nosy," Shige snorts when Koyama talks to him about this outside the building, cigarettes dangling from their fingers as they take their break for the evening.

Koyama shrugs. "When am I not?"

"Exactly. Maybe you should stop," Shige says, raising an eyebrow towards Koyama before he takes a drag of his cigarette, then throws it on the ground and stomps out the flame.

"But then I wouldn't be me." Koyama takes his last drag, leans his head against the wall behind him and shuts his eyes while Shige chuckles, already moving to go back inside.

"You've got a good point. What's Koyama without his nosy, nurturing side?" Shige laughs sarcastically; Koyama ignores him as he exhales, the cigarette dropping from his fingertips. The door shuts behind Shige, but Koyama stays outside, just staring up at the dark blue that seems spread through the sky, even above all the buildings--it's all Koyama can see.

He sighs, stamping out the remaining sparks of his cigarette before heading inside. Shige sees him, jerks his head towards Ueda who's sitting at his usual table--on a Wednesday--before telling Koyama that he'd ordered a cup of tea. His usual.

Koyama stares before rushing to get his order prepared, his mind filled with questions like why is he there.

Koyama doesn't ask though. Just goes about his business like always.

--

The next week, Ueda's not there on Wednesday--which makes Koyama breathe a sigh of relief--but while he still comes the regular days, Ueda ends up coming back on a Friday--irregular. After another week of Ueda messing up his own pattern--and maybe even Koyama's himself--Koyama can't bare it any longer.

"Here you go," Koyama says, as he always does, before placing that cup of tea in front of Ueda. Ueda doesn't acknowledge a thing, but this time Koyama doesn't leave immediately, he hovers awkwardly, stares down at Ueda until Ueda, when he moves to take a sip of his tea, finally catches sight of Koyama watching him.

"Yes?" Ueda blinks, staring up at Koyama--up and up to the point that Koyama marginally feels bad for making him have to look up--not as though Koyama would do anything about it though.

"I," Koyama starts before thinking that he is being ridiculous. He licks his lips and starts again. "I've been your waiter ever since you started coming here." It'd been about six months now. "And I was just," he pauses again, the tray he'd been carrying Ueda's tea in shakes in his hand. "You usually have a routine," Koyama goes with. "I've noticed because, well, I'm the one that serves you. And... Why did you break it?" Straight to the point, intrusive, Koyama bets, but he can't help himself anymore. He's completely curious and there's always been something about Ueda that tugs at his attention.

Ueda blinks at him--long lashes that Koyama thinks are a little too long for a male to have--and then cracks a hint of a smile. "Do you make it a habit to ask your customers their routines?" he asks instead.

Koyama flushes--because, no, he really doesn't and just doing this is embarrassing enough. "I'm sorry," Koyama ends up saying. "I didn't--I'm just going to get out of your way. Please don't stop coming. We really do enjoy your company here," Koyama babbles before he turns around and heads back to the counter where Shige's probably laughing at him.

Ueda's hand on his arm stops him though and Koyama turns around to a gentle smile. "I'm sorry. I was joking. I really don't mind. I guess if someone comes in on the same days and the same time, people are bound to notice, huh?" Koyama doesn't trust himself to actually say anything, so he nods slowly instead. "Why don't you sit down and join me?" Ueda gestures at the empty seat in front of him.

"I shouldn't," Koyama says, shaking his head. "I'm still in the middle of work."

Ueda raises an eyebrow towards Koyama. "Near midnight with nobody else but me here?"

Koyama glances around to see Shige looking down at a textbook at the counter, head leaning against his arm--although if Koyama squints enough, he thinks Shige's sleeping not really studying. The cafe is empty, not a single seat is occupied other than the one at the table he's at now. "I guess I can take a little break," Koyama says grudgingly.

Ueda laughs. "You sound so reluctant."

"More like embarrassed," Koyama says, sliding into the booth and placing the tray beside him. "I don't. I'm not usually so forward with strangers. At least not someone like you."

"Someone like me?" Ueda asks, raising another eyebrow--neat and precise, Koyama thinks he must've gotten it done or something.

"I--A guest who obviously wants to be left alone. Which I'm probably disturbing."

Ueda chuckles. "I don't. Not really," Ueda says, finally taking a sip of his tea--which must be cold by this point, Koyama figures, but Ueda makes no sign of it happening.

"But you keep to yourself. This is the first time I've seen you react to me and I've served you for the past six months," Koyama insists.

"Mm," Ueda manages. "Maybe, I guess." He glances back out the window and Koyama wonders if he's somehow entrenched on some unspoken agreement between them. Koyama bites his lower lip.

"Sorry. I think I'll get back."

"Sure." This time, Ueda doesn't stop him, doesn't convince him to stay and Koyama thinks he's worn out his welcome in only a minute.

"Right." Koyama walks back to the counter, a little dejected as he puts down the tray he's been holding right next to Shige's book. Shige jerks out of his stupor.

"Ah, how was it talking to Mister Mysterious?" Shige asks, covering his yawn with his hand.

Koyama shrugs, glances back over at Ueda who hasn't looked away from the window again before saying, "I don't know. Mysterious?" Shige snorts.

--

To Koyama's immense glee, Ueda doesn't stop coming back to the cafe even with the less than awkward conversation they had. This time though, Koyama doesn't bother him, doesn't want to even test the line to how much of Koyama he can take before he gets annoyed and stops coming.

It's Ueda who stops him and calls for his attention. "Not going to speak to me anymore?" Ueda asks when Koyama's putting down his cup of tea only a week after their first talk.

Koyama flushes. "I didn't think you'd want me to."

Ueda shakes his head. "I wouldn't mind chatting with you. The name's Ueda. Ueda Tatsuya."

Inside his head, Koyama cheers a little for getting it right, but outside, in front of Ueda, Koyama just bows slightly. "Koyama," he greets. "Koyama Keiichiro. I've worked here for about two years now."

To his credit, Ueda looks marginally interested. "Really? Is this what you want to do?"

Koyama snorts. "Who wants to be a server? No. I got my degree in Literature. I just haven't really found a way to use it." Ueda nods, before gesturing for Koyama to sit down.

Before he does, Koyama glances around--the place is empty again and this time, Shige's given up all pretense in studying, his head down against the counter and his arms around his head. Koyama shakes his head. "How about you?"

Ueda raises an eyebrow--one that Koyama doesn't quite understand why it's there--before chuckling. "Entertainment business," he ends up saying.

"Oh, model?" Koyama doesn't know how much he should say he knows, how much is appropriate. So instead, he just pretends not to know a single thing--it's not like Koyama really knows anything to begin with so he's not really lying.

"No, idol. You know, the singing and dancing kind." The nonchalant way that Ueda says this makes Koyama laugh.

"No, I really don't, but that's interesting." Koyama leans an arm against the table. "Is it fun?"

Ueda takes a pause--not a long one, but long enough for Koyama to actually notice. "Yeah. It can be."

"Can?" Koyama doesn't know if he's pushing it; he feels like he is, but there's something so strange about the way Ueda answers that makes Koyama want to know more--need to know more.

"There's always behind the scenes stuff that goes on. It's nothing to talk about," Ueda says with a wave of his hand.

Koyama blinks, then nods. "So do you get to meet any interesting people? Oh! How about that Yamashita Tomohisa guy? My sister's in love with him."

Ueda snorts. "I see too much of him. He's best friends with one of my bandmates." Koyama chuckles before Ueda starts talking about this ridiculous fight his bandmates got into over whipped cream.

--

It takes a while before Koyama gets used to just sliding into the booth whenever Ueda arrives--the fifth day really--and when he does get used to it, he spends hours just sitting there with Ueda, talking about Ueda and his bandmates, the work he does to even Koyama's stories about Nyanta, Shige and Wagahai, and how he'd seen Ueda's picture on television just the night before and laughed when his sister refused to believe that Koyama knew Ueda.

It's on the sixth day that Ueda arrives with a gift for Koyama--a message board with a message addressed to his sister--from what Koyama could see above the bag anyway.

"It's for your sister," Ueda says, sliding the bag across the table. "I thought what better way to prove you know an idol than to get a signature, right?" Koyama's eyes go wide before tugging the autograph board out of the bag, a huge 0409 scribbled along the bottom with a name that was undecipherable. "It's Yamashita's signature."

Koyama's eyes go wider, and he holds the board delicately in his hands before putting it back in the bag--safely.

Ueda laughs. "You know, I could always just get him to sign another."

"What? No! And cause more trouble for him?" Koyama asks, aghast.

"It wouldn't be that much trouble," Ueda says with a wave of his hand. "I got Akanishi to ask him and I think he just treated Yamashita to dinner. Nothing big."

Koyama smiles at Ueda, his hand never leaving the bag beside him. "Thank you," he says, sure that his eyes must be shining.

Ueda flushes, ducking his head down and stares at his empty teacup. "It's no problem. I just thought it might help."

Koyama grins before standing back up. "Let me get you a refill of that tea." Ueda nods at him.

Koyama has to resist from giving Ueda a huge hug--he would if he wasn't so sure Ueda may sock him if he did--he did know how to box after all.

--

They exchange phone numbers not too long after. Ueda takes the initiative--seems to do so more often than not actually, when Koyama thinks about it--asking Koyama teasingly, at that, with the pretense of messaging just in case Ueda wasn't going to be there and he didn't want Koyama to worry.

Koyama laughs and shakes his head, but he gives it to Ueda anyway--grinning. "Don't message me just because you miss me," Koyama jokes but Ueda goes silent and Koyama wonders if he's hit a chord somewhere.

The corners of Ueda's lips go up a minute later though and Koyama relaxes. "I should be saying that to you," Ueda retorts.

Koyama blushes, but he laughs scratching the back of his head. "You're right. Knowing me, I'll text you whenever I see something that reminds me of you."

Ueda raises an eyebrow. "Like what?"

Shrugging, Koyama tries to hide his grin--unsuccessfully, of course. "I don't know. Maybe whenever I see a fairy?"

Ueda glares at him over the table and Koyama's only glad he's not really at arms length. "I knew I shouldn't have told you that story."

Koyama laughs without restraint.

--

Koyama's true to his word. He only texts Ueda whenever he sees something that reminds him of Ueda--not fairies though after Ueda's explicit warning--but things like whipped cream, or a cup of tea, or surprisingly, a pair of boxing gloves that were hanging in a store window.

Ueda, on the other hand, doesn't text Koyama at all--except when he does end up not going to the cafe on a particular night. Koyama thinks it's kind of ironic.

"So when are you going to ask him out?" Shige asks as they're sitting at the counter, playing a round of poker, complete with Hershey kisses as their bets.

Koyama sputters, almost dropping his hand--a full house--before gathering his senses. "What are you talking about?"

Shige snorts, revealing his hand--four of a kind--which only makes Koyama frown as he watches Shige take the kisses happily. "Ueda-kun. When are you going to ask him out?"

"Why would I do that?" Koyama asks, dealing the next round.

"Because you like him?" Shige says like it's that simple.

"As a friend, yeah."

"Oh, because you don't spend all your time thinking on him and texting him and who knows what else with you," Shige snorts, putting in the small blind.

Koyama frowns. "That's because he's a friend."

"Do you do that with me?"

"Only because you would never like it if I did that. Plus I see you every day."

Shige shrugs. "If you say so." He throws down his cards again--a straight flush this time which only has Koyama protesting, accusing Shige of cheating. Shige only preens.

His words though stick to Koyama for a week--even going so far as to lessen his texting to Ueda just in case.

--

Koyama starts to think Shige's right when he finds himself drifting off and his mind automatically goes to things he wants to tell Ueda, things they could bond over, or just wondering about Ueda in general--how many friends does he have? He doesn't ever go to the cafe with anyone, just him. Does he have a girlfriend? ...Boyfriend?

Does he like Koyama? In a more platonic way, of course. Not in the romantic way that Shige insists Koyama feels--that Koyama is starting to think.

Koyama starts to notice that he notices off-handedly random things like the way Ueda's eyes brighten whenever he talks about something that he really enjoys (like boxing). Or the way his hair falls on days when Ueda's had a photoshoot. Or just the smile on his face whenever he's listening to Koyama ramble on about his really cute nephew and how it widens just a touch when Koyama gets a little more dramatic.

Koyama thinks he's fallen hard.

"I told you," Shige snorts when Koyama comes to him for advice.

"That is not help," Koyama wails, throwing his head on the counter as Shige's sweeping the floor--readying the cafe for closing.

Shige shrugs. "I'm not really that much better, you know."

Koyama groans.

"Why don't you just ask him out?"

"Not only is he an idol, but he's a guy. What if he doesn't go that way?"

"You won't know till you ask," Shige says almost sagely, leaning against the tip of the broom.

Koyama frowns. "That's not supposed to be your advice."

Shige snorts. "What? Was I supposed to say, "Forget about him. You can find love elsewhere."?"

"Maybe?"

"Do you want me to?"

Koyama sighs. "Not really." He sighs again.

"Go ask him out. Then you can sigh all you want."

--

Koyama doesn't do that, of course. Instead, he just chats normally with Ueda, makes fun of Shige and texts Ueda ridiculous things throughout the day. He still does the same things he does before--notice Ueda's smile, hair, eyes. Koyama really wonders if he's getting way too obvious.

And then Ueda comes into the cafe with another person.

"Wow, looks like you were beaten to the punch," Shige snickers as Ueda settles into his usual table, his companion moving to sit beside Ueda, not across from him. The smile on Ueda's face never drops though.

Koyama bites his lower lip. "I will pay you to work on that table for tonight. Please?"

"As much as I would like the money for school, I'm not going to do it. You need to face your demons."

"Can't I face them another time?" Koyama asks helplessly. "When I'm more prepared?"

"You'll never be more prepared," Shige retorts, shoving Koyama towards Ueda's table.

Koyama manages to throw on a smile on his face as he approaches Ueda's table, greeting him like normal and Ueda's usual cup of tea in his hands.

"Hey! Koyama-kun, meet Akanishi. He's one of the guys in my group I told you about," Ueda greets, gesturing towards the person next to him--fussy dark brown hair, bright eyes and his hand currently around Ueda's shoulders.

Jin extends his free hand, grinning. "So you're the one Ueda keeps talking on and on about." He turns to Ueda. "He is as hot as you said."

Ueda flushes, elbowing Jin sharply but never taking his eyes off Koyama--who is also blushing. "Sorry. Jin here has a big mouth."

"In more than one way," Jin laughs, waggling his eyebrows.

Koyama blinks, flushing. "Um. Well, er. Do you guys want to order?"

Jin shakes his head. "Just a glass of water."

Koyama nods, rushing back to the counter where Shige is snickering at him. "So, who is he?"

"A bandmate. I think he just propositioned me."

Shige breaks into laughter while Koyama fills up a glass of water, elbowing Shige on his way back to the table. "Shut up," he snaps over his shoulder--of course, Shige doesn't.

"Here you go," Koyama says, smiling. "I'll leave you guys alone now."

"What?" Ueda says abruptly--so abruptly that Koyama almost jumps.

Koyama turns slowly. "I mean. You guys look cozy," he says, almost reluctantly.

Jin snickers. "Please. Me and Ueda? Not going to happen." Ueda rolls his eyes. "However, he has a soft spot for you, so you should sit down. Join us."

Koyama blinks, slightly glancing at Shige who's busy pretending to study when he's really just listening in on the conversation, and who is also no help whatsoever. "I guess that won't hurt, ne?" Koyama says, settling into his usual seat.

Jin grins. "So what do you think about Tat-chan?" he asks like a gossiping schoolgirl.

Ueda elbows Jin again, stronger than before--to the point that Koyama even winces. "Jin, what are you doing?"

"Matchmaking, obviously," Jin says, rolling his eyes. "You're being an idiot and he's being slow." Jin waves his hand towards Koyama. "Sorry, I don't even know you but you are and it's getting ridiculous. So. I thought of inviting myself and getting things started!"

Koyama stares, his jaw doesn't drop open--he's not sure he has any control of his body at all to even be able to do that.

Ueda's blush has extended past his cheeks into his ears and nose and neck. "I knew you weren't here for no reason. I'm sorry about this, Koyama. I didn't--"

"I like him," Koyama interrupts to everyone's surprise. Jin's grin gets wider, Shige's snickers from the counter suddenly stop and Ueda's staring at Koyama with the oddest expression.

"Ha! Called it. I am great. Now I'm leaving so talk amongst yourself." Jin smirks before walking over to the counter, his glass of water in his hands and places himself right in front of Shige.

Ueda blinks. "You what?"

Koyama can't look at him, instead opts to look outside the window. "Er. I do like you. And I think you're nice and good to talk to."

Pause. "Are you confessing and you won't even look at me?"

Koyama snaps his head back to Ueda, biting his lower lip. "Look. I just. I don't want you to think it'll be weird to hang out with me. And I don't--" he starts, feeling himself about to start babbling but Ueda cuts him off.

"Want to go out this weekend?"

Koyama blinks.

"We can get away from this cafe and actually see daylight or something." Ueda fumbles with his napkin. "Maybe go out to eat somewhere and have a good time."

Koyama blinks again but a smile breaks out on his face. "I'd like that."

"Great," Ueda manages, before exhaling. "And I promise Akanishi won't be there."

"I heard that!" Jin screams from across the cafe.

Ueda rolls his eyes. "Not trying to hide it!"

Koyama laughs, shaking his head while Shige yells a "Took you long enough!" Koyama jerks his head towards Shige and Jin's direction in time to catch them exchanging a high five. Koyama rolls his eyes, turning back to Ueda who's shaking his head, laughing.

It took them a while to get to this point, but Koyama's more than okay with that.

Intervals of Three - Yamapi/Aragaki Yui [PG-13]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 09:26:11 GMT

Intervals of Three
tinyangl, 3911 words
Yamapi/Aragaki Yui, Jin/Yamashita Rina. Yamapi makes a life with Yui and never once looks back.
A/N: Written for nihongofrancais for my holiday meme! Be warned! Baby fic be here. XD Also, the format is not linear, so be warned. And all the Jin/Rina is all on me. Couldn't resist.

i. 0 month. (Or really, 18 months, 6 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"YAMASHITA, IF YOU DON'T GET ME TO A FUCKING HOSPITAL NOW, I WILL-"

Yamapi doesn't get a chance to find out what exactly Yui would do to him, nor does he really want to know frankly, because he's already pushing her into the car, throwing her bag into the back seat, and rushing to the driver's seat.

"WHY AREN'T WE THERE YET?!" She screams at him and Yamapi winces when she puts her hand on his arm and squeezes.

"Oh God, oh God, oh God," she moans--and not in the way he'd like, mind you--before steeling her eyes on him. "I cannot believe you did this to me. I cannot believe I let you do this to me. WE ARE NEVER HAVING SEX. EVER."

Yamapi winces again and has to remind himself that she's in pain and he should be a considerate and not think with his other brain. They finally arrive at the hospital later than Yamapi would've liked because he's almost positive that her hand marks are going to be permanent on his arm. He haphazardly parks near the front door, ushering Yui inside as she moans loudly again.

"My wife's pregnant!" he exclaims just as Yui curses Yamapi again.

The nurse behind the counter winces and ushers Yui into a wheelchair, leading her to a room. Yamapi ambles behind them with a little sigh of relief. Yui's a distance in front of him before she yells out, "Yamashita, where the fuck are you?!" Yamapi's eyes go wide before he rushes quickly to her side--the birth of their first child could happen at any moment, it seems.

ii. 3 months backward.

"What's it been? 3 years?" Yamapi asks, smiling as he shakes hands with one of his newest co-stars.

Yui looks thoughtful before smiling. "I think so. It's great to work with you again, Yamashita-kun."

Yamapi chuckles. "You called me Yamapi back then, you can do that again, you know."

She wrinkles her nose. "I don't think that'd be proper right now. I'm okay with calling you Yamashita-kun."

"Does that mean I should call you Aragaki-chan?"

She laughs--her eyes sparkling as she does so and Yamapi's almost a little, just a little taken aback. "Gakki's fine."

"So I can call you by your nickname, but you can't call me by mine?" he asks, mildly amused.

Yui's eyes go wide. "No, that's not what I meant. I mean--" She stops short when Yamapi starts laughing, the corners of his lips pulling upwards.

"It's okay," he says shaking his head. "I don't mind either."

Yui pouts at him. "You weren't like this on the Dragonzakura set," she comments.

Yamapi grins. "Things change." Before Yui can respond, Erika walks up to them, greeting both of them cordially--Yamapi never takes his eyes off of Yui, struck by how familiar he feels around her. Even if it has been three years since they last spoke.

iii. 3 years. (Or really, 4 years, 6 months, 6 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"Catch him!" Yui calls out from across the hallway. Yamapi jumps from his seat, tossing the script he'd been studying in favor of grabbing the 3-year-old that was dashing around the house nude and still dripping slightly from the bath he'd just had.

"Raimu," Yamapi says sternly, holding his son at arms length and crouching down to eye level. He raises an eyebrow.

Raimu only grins, squirms out of Yamapi's hold and manages to dash to the next room--the kitchen. Yui throws Yamapi a glare as she runs past, a towel still firmly in her hands. Yamapi chuckles before intercepting, entering the kitchen from the other entrance and catching Raimu firmly in his arms, embracing him as Yamapi stands back up.

"Active today, aren't we?"

Raimu still tries to squirm, but this time, Yamapi's not letting him. He passes Raimu to Yui who starts to dry whatever is still actually wet and that hasn't dripped onto the floor in his journey around the house.

"Your son seems to like to bare all," Yui says sardonically, giving Yamapi a half smile.

Yamapi chuckles. "If you're going to say, just like his father..."

Yui smirks. "You already said it for me." She turns to Raimu who's calmed down a little thankfully. "Okay, mister. Let's get some clothes on you. Wouldn't want to catch a cold."

"I want papa to do it!" Raimu pouts.

"Ah, your dad's busy study--"

"I can do it," Yamapi interrupts. Yui blinks at him, startled. "My script can wait. I don't mind dressing Raimu." Yui smiles, passing Raimu back to his father before drying off her hands on a nearby towel.

"Okay. His clothes are already laid out on the bed so it'll be at least a little easier." Yamapi chuckles, leaning in to peck Yui on the lips.

"I know, Gakki," he teases before ushering Raimu towards his room. "Had a nice bath?"

"Un!" Raimu says cheerfully. "Mama used that shampoo I like." Yamapi laughs, leaning in to sniff Raimu's hair.

"Mmm. Smells good too!" Yamapi swears he can feel Yui's eyes on them, just watching--probably with a smile on her face.

iv. 6 months rewind. (Or really, 12 months, 6 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"You're what?" Yamapi asks, heart pounding and eyes wide. He's not even sure he's standing anymore.

"Tomo-kun," Yui breathes, sitting down to join him on the couch--oh, he did sit down--and tugging his hand into her grasp. "I... I don't know how--"

"Of course we know how," Yamapi sighs, closing his eyes over his hand. "Shit."

Yui pauses. "Look, I can--"

"No," Yamapi says firmly, looking Yui in the eye. "I'm taking responsibility. I'll take care of everything."

Yui gives him a small smile, tugging him into her arms. "You're amazing."

"Of course, we'll have to get married," Yamapi says, more focused on trying to get everything in order. He misses the glance of disappointment on her face.

v. 3 years, 3 months rewind, 3 minutes.

"That's your co-star, Aragaki Yui. She'll be playing your girlfriend." Yamapi turns, looking over to see the girl his manager is gesturing towards. He blinks, then thinks to himself that that's not a bad girl to play his girlfriend.

"You're supposed to look disinterested," his manager coughs before Yamapi stares at him.

"What?"

His manager nods. "Yeah, something about her trying to find her way without you so you can't look interested in her, Yamashita-kun." There's something there that Yamapi knows he's trying to point out, but Yamapi can't quite decipher it. Yamapi just waves his hand in acceptance before turning to look at Yui again; she's chatting with one of his other stars--a Nagasawa Masami, he thinks--a bright smile on her face that almost calls for his attention.

She turns her head, catching his eyes--blinking and slightly confused. Yui smiles in his direction, tucking her hair behind her ear before waving to him.

Yamapi gives a half hearted one in return and exhales slowly, hoping he looks calmer than he feels. He's not sure how he's supposed to act indifferent when that's the farthest that he feels.

vi. 6 years forward. (Or really, 7 years, 6 months, 6 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"Yui!" Yamapi calls from across the yard. "I don't think we have enough balloons!"

"Papa~" Raimu whines. "When can we just eat the cake and forget about everyone else?"

Yamapi chuckles, leaning forward. "When your mom's back is turned, you can sneak a taste. Maybe get all that whipped cream off for your dad."

Raimu's nose wrinkles. "You know I don't like it too. Can't I just eat the inside? The cake part?"

"Nope," Yui chimes in, walking outside with a new bag of balloons in her hand and the other hand around her large stomach. "Here you go, Tomo."

Yamapi grins, leaning forward to kiss her and ignoring the loud "yuck" from beside him. He pulls back, puts his hand on Yui's stomach and says softly, "Only three more months before you become one of us, ne?"

"Papa," Raimu whines. "The balloons aren't done yet and I can't blow them up like you do!" Yamapi meets Yui's eyes and exaggeratedly rolls his eyes.

She laughs, shakes her head. "Rai-chan, you know you won't be able to act like that when your baby sister or brother is born."

Raimu nods, holding his head up. "I'm going to be a big brother! And protect it like daddy does for you."

Yamapi smirks while Yui tries to hold back her laughter. "Did papa tell you to say that?"

"Yup!"

"Well, just make sure you don't protect your baby sibling like your papa did his baby sister. She nearly kicked him when he forbade her to marry your uncle Jin."

Yamapi winces, like he's remembering the moment perfectly in his head.

"But what if she doesn't know what a right idiot he is?" Raimu asks, frowning. Yamapi instantly claps a hand over his mouth, chuckling awkwardly as though that would make Yui forget what Raimu had just said.

"Did your papa say that too?" Yui says pointedly, glaring at Yamapi. With Yamapi's hand over his mouth, all Raimu can do is nod vigorously.

"Heh," Yamapi chuckles again. "Um. That. That wasn't about Jin, of course. That was about something else."

"Wait till I tell him that," Yui chuckles, turning around and waddling back into the house.

"It's nothing I haven't said to his face before!" Yamapi calls out before crouching down when Yui's out of sight. "Now, Raimu, that's one of those things that we're supposed to keep between us," Yamapi says firmly.

"Oh. I'm sorry, papa. I'll try to remember next time," Raimu says before handing Yamapi a balloon. "This first though."

Yamapi shakes his head, laughing.

vii. 5 months, 1 week rewind. (Or really, 13 months, 9 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"Pi, I know you've been doing the right thing, getting engaged to Aragaki-chan and getting a place together and whatnot, but have you even stopped to think about what you're doing?"

Yamapi pauses then sighs. "I didn't call you so you could tell me what I'm doing wrong, you know."

"You're miserable," Jin says on the other end. "You're miserable and you don't know why."

"I'm not!" Yamapi snaps, annoyed. "I've been dating Yui-chan for over a year now. This is good news."

"Then why don't you sound like you're convinced yourself?"

"Since when do you pay attention to these kinds of things?"

"When my best friend seems to want an escape instead of facing up to the things he's set out for himself. Why didn't you just say what you felt then?" Yamapi can tell Jin's frowning on the other line and something about that thought makes Yamapi frown in turn.

"Because this is the responsible thing to do. We're adults, Jin. It's not that easy anymore."

"Do you want to have the baby?"

Yamapi pauses before a smile spreads on his face. "Yeah. I want the baby."

"Does Aragaki-chan know?"

Yamapi blinks. "What? Of course she does!"

"Then why is she over here with Rina and sobbing her eyes out?" Yamapi doesn't bother to respond to that, already on his feet and out the door.

"I don't want you here!" Yui hisses when Yamapi's pounding frantically on Rina's door. "You obviously don't care what I want, so get out!"

Rina gives Yamapi a glare. "If you don't get things fixed, Tomohisa. I am going to--"

Yamapi doesn't get the chance to find out because Jin's already leading Rina away from the bedrooms, ushering her into the kitchen. "Fix it!" is the last thing Yamapi hears from his sister's lips.

Yamapi leans his head against the door. "Yui-chan. Just. What's wrong?"

"If you don't know, then why should I tell you?"

"Because I won't know if you don't."

The door opens and Yui glares at Yamapi fiercely. "You know what, fine. It's because you're so caught up in doing the right thing, that you haven't even told me if this is what you even want. If you're going to be happy getting married to me and having a baby."

Yamapi stares in stunned silence. "What?"

"You pretty much always do what you're told, Yamashita. How do I know you're not just going through the steps and doing what you're expected. How do I know this is not just you forcing yourself? And--" Yui stops short, clapping a hand over her mouth. "And how do I know that you're happy?"

Yamapi abruptly takes her into his arms, squeezing tightly as he shuts his eyes. "Yui-chan, that would never happen. I'm doing this because I love you and want to have this baby with you."

"But--" Yui starts, but Yamapi interrupts. "You should've told me you were worrying about this."

"You were so focused. I just--I didn't want to ruin it."

"I'm worried too," Yamapi murmurs, still holding onto her. "I don't know if I'll be a good father. Don't know how to be one. But, Yui-chan. If it's with you, I feel like I could do this--or at least try my best."

"Oh shit, he actually did solve it without our help."

Yamapi rolls his eyes before pulling back and glaring at his sister. "Way to ruin a good moment. Thanks for keeping her away," he snaps, angling the last part more towards Jin than Rina.

"You know how determined she is." Jin only shrugs as Rina approaches Yui and smiles brightly.

"See, my brother's an idiot, but he's not that much of a fool."

Yamapi rolls his eyes again. "Thanks for putting it that way."

"And you," Rina snaps, pointing a finger at him. "You make sure you don't ruin it, idiot. I can't be here to fix things up."

Yamapi smartly avoids saying that she really didn't do anything this time and instead looks towards Yui who's trying to wipe away her tears while laughing.

"Be careful," Jin murmurs lowly as he stands next to Yamapi. "There might not be a next time."

"I know," Yamapi says exhaling. "I know." Yui's eyes meet his and Yamapi smiles at her which she returns. His heart skips a beat.

viii. 3 years, 6 weeks rewind.

"We should go on a date," Yamapi says smoothly when he's standing next to Yui.

She doesn't answer, only looks up at him blinking widely.

He nearly falters before gathering his senses. "I'm asking you out to dinner."

Yui doesn't say a word again, finally reacts though--even if laughter isn't originally the reaction he was looking for. Her laughter starts to die out slowly as she blinks at him in surprise. "What? That's not a joke?"

"What?" Yamapi asks incredulously. "How does that make you think--I. No?" He falters at the end, now more embarrassed than surprised.

She blinks at him, confused. "I'm not exactly--Guys like you wouldn't be interested in me. I'm not even a big name or anything."

"What does that matter?" Yamapi snaps--then tries to calm himself down, because it wouldn't do for him to start snapping at a girl he'd like to ask out. "I don't judge people off things like that."

Yui smiles at him, faintly before shaking her head. "I don't think it's a good idea."

Yamapi tries not to look too disappointed. "Okay," he says.

Before he can move, she has a hand on his arm. "No hard feelings, right?"

Yamapi gives her a smile. "Yeah, no hard feelings." She grins at him--looking like she had the day they met, the day she'd taken his breath away--before tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Great."

They're called to set the next second and Yamapi doesn't spend another second thinking on it--and then he's swept up in everything that he doesn't give it another notice besides a small mention to Jin who only laughs in his face for getting rejected.

ix. 6 weeks.

"Aren't you glad you accepted?" Yamapi says cheekily as they're on his couch watching some movie.

Yui laughs, shaking her head. "Maybe I should've held out a little longer if I knew you were going to get so arrogant."

He frowns, leaning in to press a kiss against her lips. "You wouldn't dare."

"No," she laughs. "I really wouldn't. It would be sad if I missed out a second time."

Yamapi grins. "I'm glad you changed your mind."

"It's been three years. Something had to."

Yamapi turns to look at her, pushing her hair behind her ear. "Yeah, well, that's not the only thing that's changed."

She laughs, leaning in to kiss him on the lips. "Hmm, is this your game, because it's completely working?"

"If it's working," Yamapi murmurs, pulling back to look her in the eye. "Then it is." Her laughter bounces off his walls as he kisses her again. And again.

x. 3 months rewind. (Or really, 15 months, 6 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"Raimu," Yamapi says firmly. "I've always wanted that as a name for my son."

Yui raises an eyebrow. "And nothing else will do?"

Yamapi flushes, covering his mouth. "It's not that--I just."

"Just want to make more decisions by yourself." Yui crosses her arms, raising an eyebrow at Yamapi.

"I-" Yamapi starts before faltering off Yui's glare. "It's just an option?" he says weakly instead.

"And I'm opting not to put it on the list," she says firmly.

"But why not?"

"Because we could always choose more meaningful names to give our child. Keep these things running in the family! Like, he could be Tomohisa Junior."

"No, I don't want to give my son my name!"

"Why not?" Yui raises an eyebrow.

"Because it's--I just don't like all that senior, junior stuff. I'd rather give him another name that'll fit him."

"And Raimu would?"

"Yes!" Yui rolls her eyes.

"And if it's a girl?"

Yamapi pauses. "Rai--Rei?"

"...Do you just like names starting with R or something? We could name her Rina after your sister," Yui suggests.

"Yeah," Yamapi scoffs. "That'd boost her ego."

"Well, if we're going with R names..."

"It doesn't have to start with an R. Maybe Yori, a Y name like her mom's."

"Yamashita Yori? Two Ys in a row? I don't think so." Yui flips through her baby book while Yamapi tries to hold back his sigh. "Did you just sigh?" she snaps; Yamapi's eyes go wide.

"Of course not!"

"If you're sick of this, then you can go do whatever. I'll take care of everything, since I am carrying the baby in my stomach, I should do all the work, right?"

Yamapi winces. "No, Yui-chan. It's really nothing like that."

"It better not be." She waddles into the next room, saying that she's thirsty and after he offers to get it for her, that she can still do things for herself thank you very much. Yamapi finally sighs, shaking his head--he honestly can't wait till at least the pregnancy is over with, because he's not sure how much he can take.

xi. 12 months forward. (Or really, 30 months, 6 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"I think Raimu's finally asleep," Yamapi exhales as he slips into bed with Yui who's already half-asleep.

"Mmm," she manages before turning over and cuddling close to Yamapi.

"Today was eventful, wasn't it?" Yamapi yawns, shutting off the light and drawing the covers over him.

"Yeah," Yui says in the middle of a yawn. "Remind me that next year, we shouldn't have such a big party. And to not invite Rina and Jin if she happens to be pregnant again next year."

"I should hope not," Yamapi snaps.

Yui laughs. "I thought you'd gotten used to them together already."

"Just because I don't scream bloody murder whenever I see them together does not mean I'm used to it," Yamapi explains.

Yui's arms around him get a touch tighter. "I think Raimu enjoyed himself, don't you?"

"With a party like that? And all the gifts he got--I think Toma got him that huge teddy bear we saw a week ago--and that cake? I think he's good for this year."

"It's just it's his first birthday, and I wanted it to go right." Yui sits up, meeting Yamapi's eyes. "Do you think he'll remember it?"

"Yui. He's one. Of course not. But that's okay. We get to embarrass him with pictures of it when he's older. I got that one with him and all the cake on his face."

She laughs, sliding back down in the bed, arms wrapped around Yamapi. "Did you notice that he wouldn't eat any of the whipped cream?"

"A boy after my own heart," Yamapi jokes.

Pause. "Do you think you want another one?"

Yamapi pauses too, before a smile breaks out on his face. "Yeah. Yeah, I would. ...Are you pregnant?"

Yui laughs. "No, but it's good information to know." She presses a kiss against his lips. "And I'd act on it tonight, but I'm too tired for that."

"Hmmm, never the kind of thing one should be tired for, but I'll let it go tonight." He kisses her head and shuts his eyes.

xii. 0 months, 6 hours forward. (Or really, 18 months, 6 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"You did amazing," Yamapi breathes as he presses kisses on Yui's sweaty forehead--pushing aside her bangs.

"If I ever want to do that again, remind me how painful it was the first time," Yui says--although she's obviously exhausted because it's not as snappy as it could be. Yamapi chuckles before looking down at the baby boy in Yui's arms.

"What are we going to call him?" Yamapi asks, watching as the baby blinks up at them with wide dark brown eyes, barely any hair on his head and the blanket comfortably wrapped around him.

"Raimu," Yui says firmly. Yamapi almost slips off the bed when he turns to her abruptly.

"What?"

"Raimu. He looks like a Raimu, doesn't he?" Yui smiles, looking down at their newborn son.

"I--Didn't you say--"

"And I changed my mind." Yui meets Yamapi's eyes, her smile bigger. "I think Raimu would be a great name for him."

"Yui, you don't...I mean, I'm glad, but if--"

"Yamashita," Yui laughs. "Just stick with it, okay? He'll be Yamashita Raimu."

Yamapi feels his heart skip a beat; he leans forward to kiss her, his hands on her cheeks. "I love you, you know," he breathes when they separate.

Yui grins, leaning her forehead against his. "Good, because you're stuck with me. And Raimu." They look back down at Raimu whose cheeks are starting to get puffed and Yamapi can just see the start of a crying fit.

"Oh! I think the baby's starting to get hungry already," a nurse says as she's walking in to check on Yui. "How about the new mom feed her baby for the first time?"

Yamapi's hand meets Yui's, gripping tightly as the nurse helps Yui position the baby over her breast--the start of their new family.

Omake:
9 years forward (Or really, 10 years, 6 months, 6 weeks and 3 days forward.)

"No, he is not joining Johnny's. Are you kidding me?!" Yamapi stares, eyes wide at the application in Yui's hands.

Yui frowns, hands on her hips. "It's Rai-chan decision if he wants to join or not."

"But--" Yamapi starts, looking down at his 9 year old. "Do you want to?"

"Un!" Raimu says enthusiastically. "Just like papa! Everyone at school talks about you, saying you're great and all these things, and I want to do what you do!"

Yamapi crouches down, smiling. "You want to sing and dance?"

"And act! I think acting looks fun. Pretending to be someone you aren't? Papa's so good at it."

Yamapi looks up at Yui, eyes narrowed. "You had this planned, didn't you?" Yui grins mischievously as Rei pads in from the living room.

"Why is everyone here?" she whines. "Weren't we watching a movie?" Yamapi moves to pick her up, rocking her from side to side.

"We're coming soon, Rei-chan," Yamapi says with a smile. "Your mama and brother were just teaming up against me. Don't ever go into entertainment, okay?"

"Like mama? But mama's so pretty on the TV! Why can't I be like her?" Rei pouts at Yamapi almost pathetically.

Yamapi stops, stares before sighing. "You too, huh?"

"Un!" Rei says happily.

Yui leans against Yamapi's shoulder, winking at Rei. "Just gotta accept it, Tomo-kun. A family full of performers, this one."

"Yeah, well. Doesn't mean I have to give them up to entertainment just yet," Yamapi starts tickling Rei as they head back to the family room, Raimu following behind them with a "Wait for me!"

Finding The Truth - Yamapi/Jin [PG-13]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 09:00:05 GMT

Finding The Truth
tinyangl, 2936 words
Yamapi/Jin. Yamapi always figured that they'd always be sneaking around, except he was tired of that. When he decides to end it, he regrets the decision more than he'd like.
A/N: Written for pixisticks for my holiday meme! Completely AU. Jin and Yamapi (and the rest of NewS/KAT-TUN) work as journalists. There are bound to be inaccuracies. Sorry about that. Oh, and lame names are lame. XDDD

Yamapi grins as he punches out his cigarette upon seeing Jin round the corner. He lifts up his camera, taking a picture; Jin blinks into the flash, stumbling forward.

"Shit, Yamashita," he hisses, managing to get to Yamapi without knocking into another person--he does end up knocking into another journalist, but it's not as though Jin really minds. "That wasn't necessary."

"Late again, Akanishi," Yamapi smirks. "I think you missed the story."

Jin rolls his eyes. "You're just pissy because even if you get here early, I'm still better than you."

Yamapi scoffs, but he knows the truth in Jin's words. They've both been journalists for the same amount of time (Yamapi a little longer even if he's younger--but mainly because he knew what he wanted to do from a young age), but Jin's stories have always been a touch better than Yamapi's--whether it be more emotional or have more impact or just more. Yamapi can't quite figure it out, but he acknowledges it all the same. "Only you would say so arrogantly that you're better than someone Especially when it's wrong."

Jin gives him a cheeky grin before the people holding the press conference--some new company going public with this innovative product--start it, calling everyone's attention, even his. "Hope you can find a good story out of your ass," Jin says over his shoulder before he moves to the front, his notepad already out and ready.

Yamapi rolls his eyes and moves to join in. "Always the potty mouth," he hisses as he tries to pay attention to the information they're giving.

"In more than one way," Jin retorts with a sideways glance. Yamapi scowls while Jin laughs a little, his hand going up when they start calling for questions.

"When you say that this is going to improve our lives, you failed to mention exactly in what areas," Jin says when they call on him. "From what I've seen, all it can do is regurgitate information that you can just as easily look at in print."

Yamapi stares, a little peeved that somehow, Jin had gotten the one-up over him and he starts to formulate questions of his own in his head.

--

Sometimes, Yamapi wonders if he just falls asleep and his body just automatically goes about the day--because Yamapi can't remember how he got inside a broom closet, Jin pressed up against him with his hands buried deep inside Yamapi's clothes, yearning for skin--getting his wish.

"Shit," Jin hisses as he grinds against Yamapi. Yamapi has to hide his groan, instead leaning his head back and hearing the clatter of what has to be cleaning products falling to the floor. He winces, wondering if they could get more obvious that they were up to something--but then, Jin plunges his hands inside Yamapi's pants and he loses all sense of caring.

Technically, they're supposed to be enemies. Technically, they work as opposing journalist for different newspapers: Yamapi works for NewS Express while Jin works for DUES--Daily Universal Expose Syndication. Technically, they don't see each other as anything other than someone they see occasionally at assignments--because, no matter what, Yamapi and Jin always seem to end up with the same places. Technically, Yamapi and Jin shouldn't have any connection--other than they had a class in college together.

But, that's too many technicalities that just aren't at all accurate--no, they didn't follow technicalities.

No, they were stupid and tried to defy the odds--even if nobody else knew.

That's why, when Yamapi goes slack, he's okay with leaning against Jin, exhaling against Jin's throat. Jin chuckles, body shaking and his throat rumbling against Yamapi.

"I think you're late for work," Jin mumbles.

"Yeah, I don't really care," Yamapi snorts, sighing again as he leans against the wall behind him. Jin grins.

"What if that was my plan all around?"

"Then I applaud you for even coming up with one," Yamapi retorts, trying to straighten out his shirt. "But thanks for reminding me. I should get to work before Koyama calls me up and asks what I'm up to."

Jin chuckles. "Yeah, Kame's just too used to me being late that he probably doesn't even notice I'm missing."

"I doubt that."

"So do I, but it sounded nice to say."

Yamapi chuckles as he steps out of the closet, Jin staying behind only to leave a few minutes later--just so it wasn't terribly suspicious. They did this more often than he could count with his hands. It was like a hidden art now, hiding their relationship from the whole world.

--

"You're late," Ryo snaps when Yamapi enters the office, his messenger bag loosely hanging on his shoulder.

Yamapi rolls his eyes. "Barely." He settles into his desk next to Shige's.

"Nishikido's a bit on the rampage," Shige leans over to whisper to Yamapi.

Yamapi chuckles. "When is he not?"

"Added irritation from the DUES editor too. Something about Ueda and a bet and, I couldn't really understand his ramblings."

There is no secret to the feud between Ryo and the DUES' editor Ueda Tatsuya; it's a feud that stemmed back to college when they'd been in more than one class together (it really is a small world). Nobody knows what started it though, but all Yamapi remembers that as soon as Ryo entered NewS Express, he already hated Ueda and that only made the relationship between the two newspapers strained.

"Should I talk to him?" Yamapi asks, pulling up his notebook out of his bag along with his camera.

Shige shakes his head. "No, I think Kei-chan already did, but just be careful not to be late. You know how he can be about deadlines."

Yamapi knows better than anyone. "You cannot be sick," Ryo snaps into the phone. "I won't accept that. No. Get in the office now." Yamapi winces, pitying whomever's on the other end.

--

They weren't in love with each other. Yamapi's heart didn't pound when he saw Jin, when they were together in whatever place they were hiding that day--broom closets, bathrooms, under desks. He didn't anticipate seeing Jin, didn't wonder when they'd see each other next. Didn't dread the fact that everyone seemed to believe his little lie--not so little, really, for they'd been doing it for too long. ("God, four years with you. Who would've thought?" Jin laughed, winking at Yamapi. "More to come, ne?") Didn't regret that he had even suggested they hide it, out of fear that everyone would react badly, especially work. And they'd worked too hard to get where they were.

Yamapi repeats this to himself all the time--because the repetition only helps him to cement the idea that all this is true. That all he feels is true, and that there isn't an ounce of regret.

He manages. For the most part.

Except for those moments when he's actually with Jin and Yamapi hates that they have to sneak around, hide, and pretend to hate each other. When it's the last thing he does.

--

"What do you think about just stopping?" Yamapi asks suddenly as he's staring at his ceiling.

Jin glances over, his questioning eyes piercing the dark of the room. "What do you mean?"

"Just stopping," Yamapi repeats, purposely not being specific.

"Always were the type to get his answers by letting the other person come to their own conclusion," Jin snorts. He pushes off the covers, sitting up and grabbing his box of cigarettes from his jeans off the floor. "But I know you. Which do you mean?" The click of the lighter tugs Yamapi's attention towards Jin who's succeeded in getting his cigarette lit, the ash tray that Yamapi keeps on his side table on Jin's lap. "Do you want to stop pretending or stop having a relationship?"

Yamapi licks his lips, watching as the light from the cigarette illuminates Jin's face, serious with furrowed brows and pursed lips. "I don't know," Yamapi ends up saying honestly.

Jin exhales, the cloud of smoke only seen because of the small light from the cigarette. "You do have to choose, Yamashita."

"Why do I have to?"

"Because you're the one who started it," Jin murmurs, looking over to meet Yamapi's eyes.

Yamapi stops, pauses, breathes, and then says the first thing that comes to his head. "Everything."

Jin gives him a soft smile, takes a drag of his cigarette before exhaling and saying, "Okay. I'm going to America in two weeks."

Yamapi stares. Then has to remind himself again that he's not in love with Jin. Not at all.

--

Yamapi ends up blowing (in a sense) his well-kept secret of about 4 years ("Isn't it exciting keeping a secret," Jin purred into his ear before pressing a kiss right above Yamapi's jawline.) a month later when he's out with Ryo, feeling like absolute shit and drinking away without regard for anything else. "So, I was in this relationship..." Yamapi pauses, wrinkling his nose. "For lack of a better word, and--"

Ryo sighs, shaking his glass and watching as liquid swishes from side to side without falling over. "With Akanishi, right?"

Yamapi pauses. "Wait, what?"

"The relationship you're talking about. It was with Akanishi." This time, it's not so much a question as it is a statement. Yamapi gapes at Ryo, eyes wide with surprise.

"I--What? How did you--It. What?"

"You guys weren't really good at hiding it," Ryo snorts, taking a sip.

"We weren't?"

"Not if you count stumbling out of the same closet good. He barely waits after you leave. And you do work at a newspaper--how could we do our job if we couldn't even figure that out?" Ryo shakes his head and Yamapi still can't close his jaw long enough to say something coherent.

"When?"

Ryo pauses, thinking it over in his head before shrugging. "Maybe two or so years ago? I think Shige found out first. He might've walked in on you or something. All I know is the look on his face was hilarious." He turns to Yamapi. "So what were you going to say?"

Yamapi stares. "I don't know anymore."

Ryo laughs, shaking his head. "How'd you feel about him leaving?"

"What?" Yamapi blinks back to attention. "I--I was okay with it."

"Were you?" Ryo presses. Yamapi doesn't answer immediately. He thinks it over, wondering if what he's been holding all along is okay to say right now. If he is okay with even saying it.

Yamapi closes his eyes and swallows. "No. I didn't want him to go."

"Then why didn't you just say so?"

"I don't know," Yamapi responds before throwing back his shot. "I don't know."

--

Jin doesn't stay in America for too long--it had only been one job, after all. So a week after his talk with Ryo and five weeks since he'd seen Jin, Yamapi goes to the airport, finding out all his details after talking to Jin's boss, Kame, who had given Yamapi a half-smirk when he'd ask--Yamapi figured this meant that not only did all of NewS Express know, but so did DUES.

Yamapi keeps his hands in his pockets, fingering the key Jin had left that night--the key that Jin had somehow wrangled from Yamapi's building's manager. ("I winked and smiled the right way," Jin boasted.) He didn't come with much, just himself and his pride. He hopes it's enough--enough for what? Yamapi's still not sure himself.

Groups of people trickle out of the terminals, and even though Yamapi knows when Jin's plane is supposed to arrive, he's still unsure when Jin will actually come out.

When he does, Yamapi expects this whole swell of music in his head--flashes to how Jin will react to seeing Yamapi there, to them making up--all happy storybook endings. Except, reality is never like that; instead Yamapi sees Jin with his arm around some blonde with green eyes, who's looking at Jin with these bright eyes that seem to take all of Jin's attention.

Yamapi freezes, stares, and can't quite figure out if he should move or not.

It takes him another minute before he turns, except someone's tugging on his arm as he's walking away and Yamapi just knows he was way too late--in more than one way.

"Yamashita," Jin calls, even though Yamapi's already stopped, Jin's hand still on his elbow. Yamapi turns slowly, putting on his best smile.

"Akanishi, welcome back."

Jin stares--he looks a little different even though it'd been only a little over a month, longer hair, darker bags under his eyes, and there wasn't a trace of a smile on his lips. "What are you doing here?"

"I thought I'd check out how you did in America. Maybe mock you somehow--like, you've gotten chubbier," Yamapi jokes, trying to stay normal.

"What are you really doing here?"

The girl stands a little bit away from them, but her eyes pierce Yamapi's--staring him down, almost daring him to say something. "Seriously. I heard through the grapevine, that's all. Thought I'd congratulate you on your article--heard you're up for some kind of prize because of it."

Jin pauses. "I didn't know," he finally says.

Yamapi laughs it off, shaking his head. "Neither did I," he answers. "Well, it was great seeing you. Glad you're still alive and," he moves to wave at the girl with Jin. "It was nice to kind of meet you." He turns on his heel then, walking away, and this time, Jin doesn't stop him.

Yamapi finds out a while later that they're serious--have been for a couple of weeks. Ryo finds himself a permanent drinking partner.

--

"Why don't you just tell him?" Ryo snaps.

"Stop getting so agitated. I think someone needs to lay off on the alcohol." Yamapi smirks.

"I've only started drinking so much because you've started hanging around."

Yamapi shrugs. "So?"

"Pi, if you don't get what I'm saying, then you're an idiot."

"I get what you're saying. I'm just not listening." He grinned brightly at Ryo before taking a sip.

"You're miserable and you're making everyone around you miserable. Why don't you just do something about this Akanishi thing and get it over with?" Ryo snaps, turning in his stool to actually face Yamapi.

"I did try. And only got disappointed. So why would I try again?"

"Because obviously you didn't try enough if you're still miserable and depressed."

Yamapi sighs. "Shut up, will you? I don't need a conscience. I managed to drown mine out days ago." Ryo rolls his eyes at him.

"Just go over to his place. Clear things up and then whatever happens, happens. At least this time, you can really end it without regret, idiot."

"But-" Yamapi starts, but Ryo quickly interrupts. "No. No convincing yourself out of it. Nothing. Just move, go there and get things done."

--

Yamapi finds himself in front of Jin's apartment--a place he had actually not gone to often, as Jin went to Yamapi's place more. ("Because yours is actually clean," Jin explains with a hint of a whine. "Maybe if you got a maid, Bakanishi.") He probably spends about two minutes just standing there, at a loss for why he's actually there until he raises his hand and presses the doorbell.

"Coming!"

Yamapi spends a second wondering if he has enough time to run before Jin gets there, but the next second, the door opens and Yamapi comes face to face with a scruffy Jin who only has on his boxer shorts.

Jin stares at Yamapi, and all Yamapi can think is that he wishes Jin would get it over with--would just say something. "Say something," Yamapi ends up blurting out, a little embarrassed as Jin's eyes narrow.

"Why are you here?"

"I." Yamapi pauses. "Because I want to be."

Jin stares at him before sighing, scratching the back of his head as he pushes the door farther open to let Yamapi into his apartment. Yamapi doesn't move until Jin's already walking back inside. He takes steps inside, closing the door behind him, trying to breathe as he watches Jin's back.

When Jin sits down on the couch, Yamapi doesn't find it in him to actually follow, to sit down as well, so instead he stands awkwardly by the television and just waits.

Jin's eyes flicker in his direction before he sighs. "Are you going to sit down?" Jin asks, eyebrow raised.

"I don't know. Should I?"

Jin rolls his eyes. "I can't give you answers to everything, Yamashita. For once, have the balls to make your own decisions."

"That's what I've been doing," Yamapi snaps. "For once, why don't you actually say what you want."

Jin stares then stands up and walks over to Yamapi, putting his hands firmly on Yamapi's shoulders before pulling Yamapi towards him and pressing his lips against Yamapi's. This is familiar; Jin's lips are warm and wet against his and Yamapi can feel Jin's heart pounding against his--skin warm underneath his fingers--he doesn't even know when he put his hands on Jin's chest for that matter.

When Jin pulls back, Yamapi thinks he's forgotten to breathe. "Is this your answer?" Yamapi asks.

Jin laughs. "I guess I need to tell you again, huh?" Jin leans in and against his lips, Yamapi mumbles a "I always did like hearing something twice."

--

"What happened to that girl you were with?" Yamapi asks, leaning back on Jin's bed.

Jin shrugs. "I think she was only with me because I knew English and Japanese. Easier to get around."

Yamapi pauses, before risking it. "You guys weren't serious?"

"Stupid. I haven't been serious with anyone but you." Jin presses his fingers lightly on Yamapi's arm--like it's a sign of how serious he is. Yamapi licks his lips before shifting in the bed, tangling his fingers with Jin's.

"Did you know that everyone already knows about us?" Yamapi asks, just to change the subject. Jin laughs, the bed shaking with his laughter.

"You were the only one that thought it was still a secret, you know."

"Are you serious? Why didn't you tell me?" Yamapi pouts.

Jin turns over, moving to straddle Yamapi, his thighs firmly against Yamapi's sides. "Because it was fucking hot pretending."

Yamapi grins, wrapping his arms around Jin's neck and pulling him down and fusing their lips together. "You always did get hot and bothered over all the sneaking around."

Rising From The Ashes - Ryo/Koyama [PG]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 08:39:57 GMT

Rising From The Ashes
tinyangl, 2073 words
Ryo/Koyama. Koyama doesn't regret his decision, but it doesn't stop him from missing performing, singing, everything.
A/N: Written for purebloodqueen for my holiday meme! Prompt being Forever Young. Lyrics from said song by The Academy Is... (Not the first holiday fic you will see where I wrote NewS splitting up. I am so depressing. P.S. manonpikamishi's piano version of White X-mas makes really good angst music. So I say.)

We're driving 'round chasing the stars

Koyama closes his eyes and sighs.

"What are you thinking about?" Ryo asks from the driver's seat. Koyama looks over, noticing how the lights hit his face as they drive past each street lamp--dark to light to dark again. His eyes though are always shrouded in shadow.

"Nothing," Koyama answers truthfully.

"Then why'd you sigh?" Ryo never looks away from the road, never turns to Koyama, and even though it would be dangerous, Koyama feels a little disheartened. He turns away, staring at the road in front of him.

"Because I felt like it."

A silence falls inside the car until Ryo comes to a complete stop at a red light. Koyama can feel Ryo's eyes on him. "Do you regret it?"

Koyama turns to meet Ryo's strong and sturdy gaze. "No. It was a good decision. The right one." He shuts his eyes again and sighs.

Ryo's gaze never wavers until the car jerks back into drive and Koyama can feel the questioning look stop for at least a couple of minutes before Ryo turns back to the road. Silence surrounds them again, and before Koyama can actually think of something, the car comes to a stop in front of his family's place.

As he unbuckles, Ryo's hand lands on his, stopping him. Koyama looks up to a face that's not pitying, but something about it feels like it is--and that just makes Koyama want to break down when it's the last thing he wants to do right now. At this second. He swallows down his emotions.

"Are you going to be okay?"

Koyama wants to laugh. It seems like such a simple question--but it really trails all the way back to the fact that NewS isn't going to be together anymore, he's not going to work at Johnny's anymore. And for that, Koyama resents Ryo for that second. That moment where Ryo should've known better than to ask that.

"No," Koyama answers, meeting Ryo's serious gaze. "But I'll get over it. Right now though, Ryo-chan. Right now, I don't know what tomorrow's going to bring." He shakes Ryo's hands off of him and removes his seat belt, sliding out of the car. "Thanks for the ride." Koyama pauses as he leans back into the car. "And good luck at Johnny's. I'll always be rooting for you."

He shuts the door behind him before Ryo can say anything back. Entering his home, and what is probably going to be his home for the next couple more years, Koyama goes up to his room. When he gets to his window, he sees Ryo's car still parked outside, Ryo leaning against it with his attention focused on his cell phone. Koyama stares, watching as Ryo punches something into his phone and then looks up to catch Koyama standing at his window. There's an unmistakable smile on Ryo's face that makes Koyama half-wonder what he's thinking before he's distracted by his phone going off: Hoshi wo Mezashite fills the room.

Koyama grabs his phone and realizes that Ryo was writing a message to him. Swallowing, Koyama starts to read and he doesn't think he can breathe for the few minutes he spends just reading and then re-reading. Four times.

"Furikaeranai sa mou nidou to wa (We won't look back and never again)
Hoshi wo mezashite (Let's aim for the stars)
Utai nagara boku wa arukidasu (I will sing as we move forward)"

By the time Koyama remembers to go back to the window, Ryo's already gone. He closes his eyes and exhales.

--

Tell me you'll remember

Koyama refuses to lose contact with anyone--even if they're not working together. He texts all six of them at least once a week, calls Shige every night because some things just never change, and someone has to make sure he gets to bed at night before an early trial the next morning.

"Do you miss it?" Shige asks out of the blue during one of their phone calls.

"Miss it?" Koyama echoes as he's drying some of the dishes, his phone nestled between his shoulder and his head. "A little. I liked performing, I loved singing with you guys. If anything, I miss being around everyone all the time." There's a hitch in Shige's breathing and Koyama closes his eyes, swallowing. "But I made a choice and I'm not backing out," he adds, hoping, praying that Shige doesn't get guilty all over again. For something he couldn't have prevented--it was Koyama's choice to quit in the office after Johnny refused to let Shige leave the group. Koyama wanted Shige to go after what he believed in.

"I miss it too," Shige says softly--Koyama freezes in his actions. Shige hadn't spoken about the separation in the three weeks since it happened. "I didn't. I still don't. We shouldn't have broken up like that," he finally says. "We deserved better. We should've gotten better. It wasn't fair that he'd do that to us."

Koyama sighs, placing the plate neatly into its slot. "I know."

"He should've kept you guys going. Shouldn't have made an ultimatum. That wasn't fair."

Koyama smiles, half-sitting, half-leaning against the sink. "I know."

Shige's near tears on the other end and Koyama wants nothing more than to comfort him, just to get him to stop. Because Koyama empathizes more than anyone, and right now, he feels like his heart is going to rip in shreds all over again. "I'm sorry."

"Hey," Koyama says roughly--as roughly as he can manage anyway. "Don't apologize. We did what had to be done. We've all accepted it."

"Kei-chan."

"Now, go to sleep. It's late and from what I remember, the hearing's at 8 in the morning. Learn up, okay? Become a great lawyer and show everyone what you can do."

"Un," Shige says on the other line before saying his good nights and hanging up. Koyama removes his apron, heart pounding. He heads for the door, grabbing his jacket and telling his parents that he's heading out--not entirely sure where, but he does it anyway.

His phone is open and out before he knows it and the phone number he punches in surprises even him. "Koyama?" Ryo greets, his voice filled with confusion. "What's up?"

"You're still in Tokyo for filming, right?"

"Yeah. Want to meet up?"

Koyama nods first, before realizing that he's on the phone and verbally says it. "Yeah. You remember that cafe by where I live, right?"

"Uh-huh."

"Is an hour enough time?"

Ryo chuckles. "Half. I'll be there soon."

Ryo hangs up before Koyama can say bye, but he doesn't mind. He enters the cafe, giving the waitress a smalls mile before moving to a booth right next to the windows. It doesn't even take Ryo a half hour to get there--only about 20 minutes (which only makes Koyama wonder if he sped his way there).

"Hey," Ryo breathes, slipping into the other side of the booth just as Koyama puts down his half finished cigarette. "What's up?"

Koyama chuckles, staring at his hands, not meeting Ryo's eyes. "Not much."

He can feel Ryo watching him with a quizzical look on his face, but Koyama's grateful when Ryo doesn't broach the topic immediately, instead ordering something to eat and drink from the waitress. When she leaves though, Ryo asks, "Why'd you call me?"

"I don't know," Koyama says, before laughing. "I never know anymore, Ryo-chan." He looks up, half-smiling even though he's almost positive his eyes are brimming with tears. "I never thought I was the type to get so attached to my job. Never thought I'd let it define me, but now without it, I'm lost. Out there in the real world without a clue to do. How the hell is my degree going to help me when I've become so used to just being an idol?"

Ryo stares at him, no frown, no nothing. Just stares before softly saying. "Isn't the floundering just another part of real life?"

Koyama laughs. "When does it stop?"

"When you stop holding on to the past."

Koyama meets Ryo's eyes, unwavering. The waitress comes by, placing Ryo's orders down and then is gone in another moment. They still don't break their eye contact until a clatter behind Koyama--the waitress dropping her tray--distracts them both. Ryo looks down at his food and starts eating while Koyama focuses on the cigarette he'd put down minutes ago.

Neither talk for the rest of the night--only saying their goodbyes when they leave. Koyama almost feels guilty for not telling Ryo thanks--just thanks for being there, thanks for coming on short notice, thanks for his words--even if they weren't what he had been looking for. They were what he needed.

Even so, Koyama doesn't say thanks. He needs more time.

--

Fallin through the night, rising from the ashes

While Koyama doesn't stop talking to Ryo--not that he would ever allow himself to break ties anyway--it's only a couple of months later that he finally sees him face to face again.

"Congratulations on the new place." Ryo raises his glass to Koyama before taking a sip.

Koyama grins, tipping his glass towards Ryo as well. "Thanks for making time in your busy schedule to come celebrate."

Tegoshi presses against Ryo's side, swinging an arm around. "Ryo-tan would never miss out a party with the six of us!"

"We'd kidnap him from wherever and make sure he's here," Yamapi jokes, taking a sip of his beer.

"Not like we couldn't overpower him," Shige smirks. Ryo glares at him darkly; Shige only shrugs.

"I just think it's great that we're together again," Massu chimes--his voice with a tinge of melancholy.

Koyama smiles. "Yeah, me too." He sips more of his drink as the room goes off in conversation--Tegoshi, Yamapi and Massu chat about Massu's most recent drama (something about chefs), Ryo and Shige compare workload--almost like they're trying to see who's been working more. Koyama shakes his head, chuckling.

The members--friends--trickle out one by one, leaving Ryo alone with Koyama, cleaning up the mess they'd left. "You'd think you wouldn't let your guest clean up with you."

Koyama grins. "If you didn't want to clean, you could've just left like everyone else."

"Ah, I knew I went wrong somewhere." Koyama chuckles as he falls back onto his couch. Ryo joins him a few seconds later, putting down the empty glasses he'd gathered on the table in front of them. "How does it feel getting out? Being in the new world."

"Scary," Koyama says. "Necessary."

"It's what you want?"

Koyama pauses, taking in a breath, slowly closing his eyes. "Yeah." He nods as he speaks, "Yeah, it's what I want."

Ryo's hand meets his--warm and friendly and familiar and comforting. His fingers tangle with Koyama's as he murmurs, "Then you're doing the right thing."

Koyama feels the smile spread over his face. "I know." He pauses again. "Thanks."

"No problem."

Ryo ends up staying the night and Koyama's more than glad for it. It's a nice feeling waking up on his first night in his apartment to a familiar face.

--

You & me forever, forever young

They don't really talk it out, not really. It happens so gradually that when Koyama turns around, he's not entirely sure when it actually started.

Ryo kisses him lightly one night when Koyama's getting up to get a new cup of tea--Ryo's taken to crashing at his place after work when he's in Tokyo. Koyama closes his eyes--warm and light--before Ryo pulls back. Koyama licks his lips, opening his eyes again to see Ryo focusing on the television again.

"What was that for?" Koyama asks, fingers against his lips.

"I felt like it," Ryo says simply, turning his gaze on Koyama.

Koyama blinks then smiles, leaning in to press a kiss on Ryo's lips. When he pulls back, Ryo asks, "And what was that for?"

"I felt like it," Koyama responds, walking towards the kitchen. He hears Ryo chuckling behind him as he moves.

They don't complicate things--don't want to, because sometimes, actions say more than words. And Koyama is just reminded of the day he walked out of Johnny's office after Johnny had told Shige to choose--Koyama made his choice. Voiceless, but loud all the same.

He does the same thing now as he hands Ryo a key to his apartment. Ryo stares at him, mouth open in what has to be shock. "Wha-"

"So you don't have to keep waking me up, pounding the door at like 1 in the morning and asking to be let in," Koyama explains before Ryo can even get the question out.

"Oh." Ryo still can't say anything past that.

"You're welcome," Koyama snorts, shaking his head.

Ryo smiles then--a smile that has to be the most sincere Koyama's ever seen--before murmuring, "Thank you." He leans forward, tugging Koyama's towards him, pressing his lips against Ryo's. "Thank you."

Four Times Yamapi and Maki were Interrupted, and the One Time They Weren't - Yamapi/Maki [PG-13]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 08:02:29 GMT

Four Times Yamapi and Maki were Interrupted, and the One Time They Weren't
tinyangl, 1524 words
Yamapi/Maki. Apparently, alone time for Yamapi and Maki isn't as easy for them to get as they'd like it to be.
A/N: Written for procreational for my holiday meme!

i. Maki doesn't hate Yamapi's friends--she doesn't even dislike them. She thinks they can be funny and interesting and all sorts of things. In their own time. Not when she's in the middle of snuggling up against Yamapi and they're watching some movie that makes her wants to cry because it's just that sad.

Except she can't because Jin and Ryo have randomly decided to crash their date and sit in the free spots around her and Yamapi (the love seat to Yamapi's left and an empty space beside her where her feet were resting). Jin has something "important" to talk to Yamapi about that only seems to be girl problems--which he then asks Maki for her advice ("No, Akanishi-kun. I really don't think it's a good idea to sleep with a girl's twin sister and then sleep with her saying that you thought it was the sister.").

And all the while, Maki's eyes are still a little red from all the sniffling, Ryo's stealing all their food off the table--"Hey! Make sure to share that!" Jin snaps--Yamapi's sympathetically pressing kisses in her hair and his arm around her waist gets a touch tighter, but he still nods and listens as Ryo and Jin talk about their adventures in Harajuku and nearly getting discovered by fangirls--and so many other things that Maki's not really interested in because the movie's still on pause and she has to know if Shinya got to Ryo on time or what!

"I'm sorry," he murmurs against the side of her ear, pressing a kiss there while Jin and Ryo are fighting over the last chip.

Maki shakes her head and sighs, relaxing against his shoulder. "I guess I'm kinda used to it."

Yamapi gives her a half-smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes and Maki sighs.

"Don't make that face with me," she complains. "You make me want to apologize!"

He chuckles before leaning in again to press a light kiss against her lips and then leaning his forehead against hers. "Next time, I'll make sure to hide the spare key." Maki giggles.

Then Jin notices they're watching a movie and instantly wants to know what it's about.

"Let's just watch from the start, idiot," Ryo snorts, leaning back and giving Maki a "what the hell is wrong with him?" face. Maki shakes her head with a laugh until Yamapi's chest rumbles as he says turning to look at her, "Why not?"

Maki scrunches her nose. She's not sure if she wants to watch half of the movie all over again. ...Then again, she really does want to find out what happens. "Sure," she ends up saying.

Jin beams and restarts the movie.

ii. It's not as though her place is even better as Meisa throws open the front door to find Yamapi hovering over Maki on the couch; Yamapi blinks at Meisa in both confusion and panic. Maki glances over, sighing as she pushes Yamapi off of her.

"Weren't you going to be gone all night?" she asks as she pushes the straps of her tanktop back up her shoulders. Yamapi sits back down, combing a hand through his hair.

Meisa fails to hide her amusement as she tosses her keys on the side table, going through her mail. "That's tomorrow, Maki-chan. Although I'm glad to have stopped you before something were to happen." She flashes Yamapi a less than agreeable smile--Meisa's approval of Yamapi hasn't been very high.

Maki winces as Yamapi flashes a pleasant smile, although his hand tightens around hers. She sighs, getting up and throwing on her sweater (which they'd thrown on the floor only a minute ago) and tugging Yamapi towards her. "Well, we'll just be going then."

"Maki-chan," Meisa says reprimandingly albeit gently at the same time--her strategy in guilting Maki. Maki glances over to see the arch in Meisa's eyebrow. "Don't you remember? We have plans tomorrow morning."

Maki winces again as she realizes that, yes, they do have plans in the morning. Turning around, she faces Yamapi with the best apologetic face she can muster, but before she can even say a word, he's leaning down to press a chaste kiss on her lips and pulling back with a smile. "It's okay, Maki-chan. I have work early in the morning anyway. I'll see you later?"

She smiles, nodding before he leans in again. When he pulls back, he gives Meisa a wave. "Bye, Kuroki-san," he says cordially, even bowing a little.

Meisa gives him a dry smile, eyes practically glaring as Yamapi leaves their place. "Bye, Yamashita-kun," she finally calls out just as Maki's shutting the door.

Maki glares at Meisa as she starts for her room. "I didn't get the day wrong, did I?"

Meisa grins at her back. "Nope."

The door shuts behind her and Maki rolls her eyes.

iii. They work hard--some more than others--so Maki's usually very understanding when work circumstances come up in the middle of their dates--which happens more often than not. Like right now when Maki's twirling a straw inside her glass, listening to the sound of ice against glass while Yamapi's on the phone with who she thinks is Koyama.

She glances up to watch Yamapi nod as Koyama babbles on the other line--she can't remember the last time Yamapi actually said something--and he flashes her a weak smile.

Maki waves it away and goes back to twirling her ice around.

"Yeah, no. I got it, Koyama." Yamapi nods again before shutting off his phone. "I'm sorry," he says to Maki who only shakes her head.

"You're a good leader," she says with a smile.

Yamapi chuckles. "I don't know how much of a leader I am when I'm the one being told things."

Maki shakes her head. "You are."

"So, what were we up to?" Yamapi murmurs, leaning forward. Maki can't help her small grin before she leans over the table, so close to him that she can feel his breath against her lips. That is until his phone rings again and Maki sighs, sitting back down.

Yamapi gives her another apologetic look before glancing at his phone and mouthing, "Tegoshi." Maki nods and Yamapi takes the phone call.

She goes back to listening to the sound of ice against glass--not as nice as before as the ice has already melted--and the murmurings of Yamapi on the phone.

iv. Maki can't always blame the interruptions on Yamapi--even if his phone goes off a lot more than normal people's do--she has her fair share of phone calls in the middle of their dates.

Yamapi's pressing a kiss on her throat and Maki sighs, closing her eyes. Until her phone goes off and Maki throws her head back with a groan. "You don't have to pick it up," Yamapi says right after almost like a reflex, even though he's already sitting back down on his couch.

"Of course I do," she says without really needing to, already flipping open her cell phone to see that Toma's calling her. "Toma-kun?" she asks, tilting her head to the side.

Yamapi gives her a puzzled look and she shrugs back at him.

"Hey, Horikitty!" Toma cheerfully greets on the other end. "I'm out with Shun and Yuu-kun and we were thinking of you and thought you should come out with us if you're free!"

"Ah, actually, I'm out with Tomo-kun and--"

"Yamashita?" Toma interrupts. "He's there too? He should come! I haven't seen him in ages. And I don't think Yuu-kun has either. And it'll be great!"

Maki pauses before giving Yamapi a sideways glance who blinks at her in confusion.

"Ah... I guess we could stop by for a few minutes," Maki says weakly--it doesn't sound too bad, she tells herself.

"Great!" Toma starts to tell her the address and how to get there while Yamapi asks her quietly, "Where are we going?"

Maki covers the mouth piece of the phone and tells him, "Toma-kun invited us out with him, Shirota-kun and Oguri-kun."

"Oh."

"I'm sorry," she says weakly.

Yamapi shakes his head, giving her a grin. "It's okay. I haven't seen Toma for a while, so it's okay."

Maki looks at him gratefully, leaning in to press a kiss on his lips before Toma abruptly goes, "Maki-chan. Are you even listening?"

"Of course!" Maki says in a rush, flushing. Yamapi chuckles and pulls her close to him as they get all the details.

i. It's really those moments when they don't try--when it just falls into the right time, the right place, the right everything. When Maki gets out of work early and she manages to catch Yamapi finishing for the day and they have dinner and watch a movie on his couch.

When he's pressing kisses in her hair, her cheek, her lips with his fingers tangled with hers.

When it just feels right and Maki feels at home in his arms.

They get as much free time as possible as they can--without anyone pestering them or calling them. When it's just the two of them in each other's company and Maki doesn't even remember falling asleep.

Yamapi greets her groggily, covering his yawn up with his hand. "Good morning," he murmurs.

All Maki has to do is breathe and repeat the words. "Good morning." It's definitely good for her when she wakes up to Yamapi's smile and the feel of his embrace is still around her. Even with everything, it's always just them in the end.

Color - Tegoshi/Massu [PG-13]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 07:41:51 GMT

Color
tinyangl, 3902 words
Tegoshi/Massu, hint of Ryo/Shige. Tegoshi notices Massu's smile more than he does other people, so when he notices how lackluster it's been, Tegoshi becomes slightly focused on changing it.
A/N: Written for jadedfrenzy for my holiday meme! Completely AU. Tegoshi's a businessman (along with Ryo and Shige) while Massu works as a doorman at Tegoshi's building (along with Koyama) and lives with Yamapi who is a struggling actor. XDDD Strange, I know.

i. Say Hello

"Good afternoon, Tegoshi-san."

Tegoshi always gives Masuda a nod, maybe a warm smile if he can manage it--more often than not, he's too busy talking about something or another on the phone that he only manages a nod--but he always notices the bright smile that Masuda has on his face as he holds the door for Tegoshi on his way out.

Not that that's hard to miss. Masuda has this smile that people would have to be blind not to nice--warm, bubbly, kind--qualities that people around Tegoshi need more of.

So when Masuda's sporting a weak smile that doesn't reach his eyes--heck, doesn't even reach half his face--Tegoshi stops himself for a second and blinks.

Masuda blinks back at him. "Te---Tegoshi-san?" he asks, head tilted.

Tegoshi's eyes narrow. "Are you okay?"

"I-" Masuda starts before frowning. "Um, yes, sir. Thanks for asking though." His eyes shine a little bit more and Tegoshi nods, satisfied.

"Okay, well, have a good day," Tegoshi tells him before heading out the door, his cell phone back to his ear.

It's when Tegoshi's already halfway to his car that Masuda says urgently, "And a good day to you too, sir!" Tegoshi turns, gives Masuda a bright smile and then disappears into his limo.

Tegoshi chuckles. "Just a little conversation with a normal person, Ryo-tan. Now what were you saying?"

"Are you implying I'm not normal?" Ryo says gruffly.

"Never. Now what's this about a merger?" Tegoshi asks sweetly. Ryo pauses and Tegoshi can just see his eye roll. He would know Ryo pretty well; they were business partners after all.

ii. GanGanGanbatte.

"Massu. Massu." The voice pulls him out of his thoughts. "Ne, Massu."

Massu blinks, shaking his head slightly to get his focus back. "Huh?"

Koyama stares at him, frowning. "Are you okay? You've been distracted lately."

"Ah," Massu says softly, gathering his stuff up and standing from the seat he sits in day after day. Koyama takes his place, still frowning up at Massu. "It's nothing," he chimes, trying to sound cheerful. "Just a little of family problems."

"Did your dad lose his job again?" Koyama asks, frowning.

"Yeah," Massu says, leaning against the table on the other side of the counter. He sighs. "They didn't want to tell me at first since I've moved out, but I think it's getting bad." He frowns again.

Koyama sighs. "What do you think you're going to do?"

Massu shrugs nonchalantly, even though he feels nowhere near it. He smiles brightly--fake, he knows it's fake and he hates that it's fake--and tells Koyama, "Play it as it plays. Maybe work extra." He claps a hand on the counter before turning on his heel. "Have a good shift, Kei-chan."

"Have a good night, Massu!"

Massu gives Koyama a wave as he heads to the locker room to change and head home to his roommate, and hope that maybe he'll figure something out on the way there.

iii. Devil or Angel.

Tegoshi rolls his eyes as Ryo and Shige bicker over the dinner table like they always do. He takes a small sip of his wine before sighing again. "Really, do you guys always have to argue every second?"

Ryo and Shige say simultaneously, "We're not arguing."

Tegoshi holds his hands up in defeat. "Okay, okay." He goes back to his meal as the two continue to go over the pluses and minuses of their company's newest merger. Tegoshi finds that while he enjoys dinner at Ryo and Shige's (they're roommates--even though Tegoshi constantly wonders if they're more than that), all their debating--debating, not arguing--tends to leave a sour taste in Tegoshi's mouth. Suddenly, Masuda's frown pops into his head and Tegoshi frowns slightly as well, wondering why the image would appears randomly.

He takes another sip of his wine.

"What are you distracted by?" Shige asks out of the blue--or maybe not out of the blue, Tegoshi hadn't been paying attention for the past ten minutes.

"Huh?" Tegoshi blinks, looking up at Shige. "Um, nothing really." He smiles brightly. "I'm glad you guys stopped though. Maybe now we can actually talk business."

Ryo chuckles, leaning forward on his elbows. "Are you always just business, Tegoshi?"

Tegoshi grins. "Only when I can be."

"Isn't that just 24/7?" Shige snorts.

Tegoshi sends him a wicked grin. "Like I said, when I can."

iv. Boom! Boom! Power!

Massu enters his apartment to find Yamapi on the couch watching television, yawning, scratching places that probably shouldn't be scratched so publicly (even if it was their apartment) and holding a bottle of beer. "Hey, Massu!" he greets with a smile that reaches up all the way to his eyes even though his bags are heavy and he's obviously exhausted.

"Hey!" Massu greets, throwing his bag into the nearest open chair and then falling into it with a sigh.

"Anything interesting happen at work?" Yamapi asks, leaning forward to grab an unopened bottle of beer off the table and handing it to Massu.

Massu chuckles. "What could happen when I'm opening doors for multi-millionaires?"

"You could get a hundred dollars randomly. Just for smiling at someone."

"That was Kato-kun on the 3rd floor and I just helped him pick up some papers before they flew away," Massu explains, taking a sip of his beer.

Yamapi laughs. "Only one of those rich snobs would give you a hundred bucks just for that."

"We're only saying that because we're not rich."

"Isn't that a shame," Yamapi bemoans before taking another sip. He clunks his empty bottle of beer on the table before getting up and stretching. "Well, I'm going to turn in. Shooting's early in the morning and the extras have to get there an hour earlier than the stars."

Massu gives Yamapi a nod before blurting out, "Hypothetically, what would you say if I said I wanted to move back home?"

Yamapi spins on his heel, giving Massu a firm stare. "Are you for real?"

"No. That's why I said hypothetically."

"You're one of the best roommates I've ever had. You're neat, you can cook. Well. You pay all your bills on time and you don't seem to mind when I'm being particularly annoying. It'd be a shame, but." Yamapi pauses. "If you need to, I understand."

Massu gives Yamapi a bright smile. "I'm one of your best roommates? Awww, Pi."

Yamapi flushes. "That's what you take away? Thanks," he grumbles, heading into his room.

"If it helps, you're one of my best roommates too!" Massu laughs lightly as Yamapi shuts the door loudly behind him. The smile on Massu's face brightens as he takes a sip of beer and stares mindlessly into the television with its dramatized scene with Rescue Rangers. His decision wasn't being made easier in the least.

v. Alibi.

Tegoshi frowns when he enters the lobby to find Masuda staring intently at what has to be his checkbook. Masuda frowns. Then deepens.

"Masuda-kun," Tegoshi greets cordially, leaning against the counter. Masuda fumbles with his book, stuffing it underneath his bag, and then greets Tegoshi with a bright smile.

"Tegoshi-san!" Masuda greets cheerfully. "What can I help you with today?"

Tegoshi pauses, a little uncertain with why he stopped in the first place. But he's always been really good at thinking on his feet. "It's nothing much, Masuda-kun, but I heard you're a good cook, right?"

Masuda blinks. "Um. I guess a little? I don't know enough to really say I'm good."

"Listen, my main cook is out on vacation. Something about a family thing, I don't know. But I'm having some company over tonight and I need someone to properly prepare dinner," Tegoshi explains. "I'll pay you, of course. A set price even if the food's not exactly up to par."

"I-" Masuda starts, the surprise obviously on his face. "I don't think--Don't you have someone you can call? That might be better, Tegoshi-san."

Tegoshi shakes his head. "No. I have good instincts. When does your shift end?"

"Um, at 4, Tegoshi-san."

"I know you have the key so just let yourself in." Tegoshi starts fumbling in his bag before pulling out his check book. "Now, what sounds like a good price?"

"Aa, Tegoshi-san! Maybe you should pay me after? I mean, what if what I make isn't good?" Masuda fumbles, biting at his lower lip--Tegoshi thinks it's kinda cute in that "he's looking a big teddy bear" kind of way.

Tegoshi chuckles, putting the book away. "Well, I trust you to do well, but if you insist." He starts towards the door and Masuda rounds the counter quickly, appearing beside Tegoshi and holding the door in a second. "Thanks, Masuda-kun. And I'll see you tonight."

"Um, sure." Masuda nods shakily, although the smile has never really left his face. "Tonight."

As he walks towards his limo, Tegoshi thinks that he might get to see Masuda's real smile again instead of the one he's been forcing on the past few days.

vi. Nandex2 Dame.

"Massu!" Koyama calls out, flying towards the counter. "What's this rumor that you're going to Tegoshi-san's place?"

Massu pales, wondering how it could've spread so fast. "I'm not really sure myself. He just said something. I kinda said yes." Massu pauses. "Wait, did I say yes? I don't know. I must've. I have to go there and cook. How did he even know that I could cook?"

Koyama shrugs. "Grapevine. You know how loud some people are."

Pause. Massu raises an eyebrow. "Kei-chan. Have you been saying things?"

"What?!" Koyama starts, flushing. "Why would you think I had something to do with it?"

"Because you can be a babblemouth when you want to be. Did you tell Kato-kun things again?"

Koyama pouts. "Shige-chan doesn't gossip."

"Shige-chan? Since when were you close to Kato-kun?"

"We're buddies. Nothing big. Besides, he has it in for his roommate." Koyama's eyes go wide and he claps a hand over his mouth. "I wasn't supposed to say that."

Massu snickers. "And you wonder my suspicious."

"Whatever. Are you going to do it?"

"Yeah, might as well. I mean, if I'm getting paid. I could use the money."

>"Good. Now get out of my chair and go upstairs." Massu blinks before looking abruptly at his watch.

"Crap!" Massu hisses as he moves to pack up his things. "Didn't realize it was over my time already."

Koyama chuckles. "Go go. Maybe if you can get extras, save some for me. I haven't had anything but ramen for days."

"That's what happens when your family owns a ramen-ya. I'll let you know how it goes," Massu calls out before he enters the elevator. Koyama waves at him from the desk, grinning and calling out to give him luck. Massu thinks he needs all the luck he can get.

vii. Smile Maker.

When Tegoshi gets home, he can smell good--and he means good food--wafting from his kitchen to the front door. Tegoshi thinks he was right to believe in Masuda as he takes every step deeper into his apartment, a bottle of wine nestled underneath his arm as he struggles to pull out his checkbook.

The first thing Tegoshi sees when he enters the kitchen is Masuda in a pink frilly apron that Tegoshi doesn't ever remember owning, holding a tiny dish to his mouth and then beaming brightly as he pulls away. Somehow, Tegoshi thinks Massu's exactly where he should be right now. Massu's eyes catch Tegoshi's at the doorway and he grins wider.

"Tegoshi-san! Welcome back!" Masuda greets as he shuts off the stove.

Tegoshi blinks again. "Um, hey! The food smells good," he comments, walking up to the kitchen counter and putting his things down. Masuda rounds the table, helping Tegoshi as he grabs the wine and places it down carefully.

Thanks, Tegoshi-san!" Masuda reaches over to grab the dish he'd been holding when Tegoshi entered the room and holds it up to Tegoshi's mouth. "Why don't you taste a little? Let me know what you think."

"Sure." Tegoshi leans over, takes a sip and flavor--rich, strong flavors that just overwhelm him--that he doesn't really know explodes in his mouth. "Wow," Tegoshi mumbles, pulling back. He blinks up at Masuda. "How--Are you always this good?"

Masuda shrugs, putting the dish back down. "It's all self-taught so I don't really know if you could compare me to other people." He wipes his hands on the apron, moving to untie it. "But as long as you think it's good." He smiles brightly at Tegoshi--this time, it reaches his eyes and Tegoshi thinks that the sight makes everything worth it. Tegoshi blinks and then refocuses on his checkbook.

"You did great. How much should I pay you?" Tegoshi asks, smiling as he opens his checkbook to an empty check and then looks up to meet Masuda's eyes.

"Um," Masuda freezes. "I. Whatever you think is best, Tegoshi-san."

Tegoshi stares. "You do know that's not really a safe answer to give people."

Masuda blinks. "What?"

"You could get seriously gypped that way," Tegoshi says seriously. "These are things you have to pay attention for Masuda-kun. Be firm. It'll get you places." He starts filling out the check, signing it in the same huge cursive that he always used. Tegoshi rips it out and hands it to Masuda with a smile. "Here."

Masuda looks down at the check, furrows his eyebrows and then looks back up. "Um, Tegoshi-san. I think that's too many zeros."

"No, it's well deserved," Tegoshi says with a wave of his hand. "Would you like to join us for dinner, Masuda-kun?"

"I-" Masuda stumbles with his words. "I don't think that'd be very polite of me."

Tegoshi shakes his head. "It's nothing formal. Just a meal between my close friends. You should stay. Reap your own rewards. I don't take no for an answers." He grins widely.

"I-Sure," Masuda ends up saying, albeit reluctantly. "Thanks for inviting me."

"Great! Ryo-tan and Shige should be coming any minute now." Tegoshi leads Masuda towards the dining room, nodding at his butler to prepare the table. "I can't keep calling you Masuda-kun, what's your full name?"

"Masuda Takahisa?"

"Hmm."

"Most people call me Massu though," Masuda adds.

"Ooh! Massu! That sounds really nice! Can I call you that too?"

"Sure," Masuda--Massu--says with a half-smile.

"And I just go by Tegoshi, you don't have to keep being formal with me."

"Um, sure, Tegoshi-s--" Massu bites his bottom lip and Tegoshi laughs heartily.

"Don't worry about it." Tegoshi beams brightly, arm around Massu's shoulders. "So tell me about yourself!"

viii. Change The World.

By the time Massu gets home, he still feels a little dazed and confused, and more than a little weirded out. Although Nishikido and Kato both knew Massu as the doorman, they were still more cordial to him than he would ever expected them to be. Hell, if he was honest, they were acting like he was a friend--like a normal friend that always spent dinner with them.

Okay, their bickering (or flirting as Tegoshi had whispered at one point) was a little off-putting to sit through, but after the first two arguments, Massu was starting to believe that they actually liked when they argued.

"Hey! Late night, huh?" Yamapi greets at the couch. There's no beer in his hand this time, but he does have another person sitting beside him.

Massu chuckles as he slumps into his usual chair, energy spent. "A little. You got my message though, right?"

"How was dinner with the millionaires?" Jin asks--Jin being Yamapi's close friend that's trying to make his break in acting just like Yamapi is.

Massu shrugs. "I'm not sure. Good. Weird. I surprisingly didn't feel out of my skin for a third of it."

"Only a third?" Yamapi asks, eyebrow raised.

"Tegoshi likes to talk business at the dinner table. Nishikido and Shige say it's normal for him, but I think it's a little strange for a person to be so focused on work." Massu wrinkles his nose.

"But did they like your food?" Jin asks, grinning.

Massu flushes. "Yeah. Actually, Nishikido and Shige insisted that I should become a chef. I'm not sure if that was them or the wine talking though," Massu chuckles faintly.

"See!" Yamapi pumps his fist into the air. "I told you you could totally become a chef with your skills. You should do it!"

"Nobody's going to hire me when I have no training, Pi. I told you that before."

Jin rolls his eyes. "And we have no training too, but we're still getting through."

Shrugging, Massu doesn't elaborate. "Well, doesn't matter. This was a one time thing anyway."

"Maybe. I don't think that Tegoshi guy will leave you alone. This is the second day," Yamapi points out.

"Ooh! You know what they say about the third day!" Jin chimes enthusiastically. Massu blinks and Jin takes that as a sign to continue. "It's a charm!"

"Isn't that--" Massu starts, but Yamapi shakes his head, urging Massu not to continue his thought. "It's not going to happen. Tegoshi's not going to focus on someone like me."

There's this unmistakable twinkle in Yamapi's eye that Massu can't quite understand why it's there. "Who knows. People may surprise you." He pauses. "Oh by the way, you got a message by the phone." Massu looks at Yamapi suspiciously before turning to the notepad right next to him.

"Massu. From Tegoshi: Dinner was amazing tonight! Even Ryo-tan and Shige agreed. You should definitely come by again, and you won't even have to cook! Unless you want to. (laugh) It was fun, ne? Oh! And write hearts in. I like hearts."

Massu gives Yamapi a half laugh-half smile. "Was that last part supposed to be there?" Yamapi leans over to get a good look before rolling his eyes.

"Not my point. Just. He called. Wants you there more. I think you should go for it. 'Snot every day a millionaire would call up and ask to hang out."

"He's not a millionaire," Massu grumbles. "He's just a little well off."

"Does he have a butler?" Jin asks cheekily.

Massu stares before getting up. "I'm turning in. Early morning." Halfway to his room, he can hear Jin asking Yamapi, "That was a yes, right? I was totally right, wasn't I?"

He doesn't even have to turn around to see Yamapi's eye roll.

ix. Hajimete no Asa.

Tegoshi can't figure it out himself--it's not often that he finds himself drawn to people. So when he sees Massu sitting in the usual place as Tegoshi's heading off to work and he's humming, it pulls at his heartstrings just a little, tiny bit. "Tegoshi!" Massu greets cheerfully, already at the door.

Tegoshi gives him a giant smile, a nod and then he's out the door. It's not like he's ignoring him--by far--it's just that he has someone on the other line and they're yelling at him for not paying attention--which okay, he wasn't.

Then he brings it up with Ryo and Shige at dinner that night.

"You mean you didn't noticed?" Shige scoffs.

Ryo gives Shige a dirty look. "Don't make fun of him. It's not like people are always so quick on the uptake about their feelings." Tegoshi watches as Ryo and Shige continue to stare each other down. One minute. Two. Tegoshi coughs. Then coughs again because the first time didn't seem to work.

"Hi. We're talking about me here?" Tegoshi says when the two finally turn back to him. "What do you mean anyway? And I don't care if you say it condescending, just make it understandable and not in Shige speak."

Shige glares at him as Ryo snickers for a second, shaking his head. "Tegoshi, I would think you'd be able to tell when you have a crush on someone."

Tegoshi blinks. "What? I barely know him."

"That doesn't mean you aren't crushing on him," Shige scoffs--again. Tegoshi isn't really appreciating this.

"Yes, but you would think that'd come in handy, wouldn't you? You know, knowledge?" Tegoshi retorts.

"Yes, and you were definitely trying."

Tegoshi blinks. "What?"

"Look, dinner yesterday was definitely fun, but you were drilling him. "What's your family like?" "What do you do for fun?" "What kind of people do you like?" "What's your type?" Tegoshi, you were trying to find out as much as you possibly could." Ryo explains.

That's what you do to be polite!" Tegoshi cries out, frowning.

"It's not weird to crush on someone, Tego," Shige sighs. "Why are you acting so bent out of shape?"

"Because it's weird," Tegoshi mumbles.

"Because he's our doorman?" Ryo snaps. "I know you feel privileged and all, but--"

"Not that," Tegoshi interrupts. "He's better than I am."

Shige blinks. "Wait, what?"

Tegoshi sighs. "I don't know. He. He seems really nice and his smile has something that's really just. I don't know. Nice and. I don't think he'd like being around someone like me anyway."

Ryo and Shige exchange looks before Shige gives Tegoshi a crooked smile. "Wow, you have it bad."

Tegoshi flushes. "Look who's talking," he retorts. Despite the fact that Tegoshi never brings up whatever's going on between Ryo and Shige, he's more than glad to right now if only for the deep red flush that fills all of Shige's face to the point that he's not sure what isn't red anymore.

"Be quiet." Ryo laughs hard before Tegoshi rounds on him.

"You too, Ryo-tan. Don't think I can't tell."

Ryo turns red, almost matching Shige's. "Whatever. You're still crushing on Masuda. Don't think we're going to forget any time soon."

Tegoshi sticks out his tongue.

"And this is the guy most of our lives are centered around," Shige chimes, laughing. Tegoshi cracks up along with him.

x. Nantoka Naru Sa.

Massu gets the phone call from his mom about three days after his dinner with Tegoshi. "Takahisa, this is too much!" she bubbles over the phone. "I can't take this!"

"Okaa-chan, it's okay," Massu returns, beaming. "You guys need it more than I do anyway. I do well enough for myself."

"Takahisa, how could you even get this money?" she asks

Massu pauses before replying. "It was a job. A job from a really nice guy. I guess he thought I did a good job."

His mom pauses on the other end. "I hope you're taking care of yourself, Takahisa. You should come home sometimes. We miss you around here."

Massu chuckles, shaking his head just as the elevator doors chime and they slide open with a ding. "Ah, I have to get going, mom, but I'll definitely come home some time soon." When he shuts his cell phone, Tegoshi steps out of the elevator, a grin already on his lips.

"Hi, Massu!" he says cheerfully, ambling over to Massu's counter.

Massu chuckles, stuffing his phone in his breast pocket before leaning forward. "Not rushing out the door today?"

"Yes and no. Just stopped by to ask if you wanted to have dinner tonight." Tegoshi smiles brightly at him--to the point that Massu thinks that his happiness would be absolutely infectious.

"Sure, do you want me to cook anything?" Massu asks, tilting his head.

"Ooh! That'd be great, but you don't have to. I mean, my cook's back so you don't have to--" Tegoshi starts.

Massu shakes his head. "I wouldn't mind it at all." He stands up walking with Tegoshi towards the doors before he opens it up. "I liked cooking for you guys last time."

Tegoshi beams. "Great! I'll see you tonight then!" Tegoshi heads into his limo, grinning at Massu before disappearing inside.

Massu blinks. Wonders for a brief second if he imagined his heart skipping a beat before he pauses, shakes his head and walks back to his table, humming

xi. Love Song.

Tegoshi grins when he enters his apartment and all he can smell is food--good, absolutely delicious smelling food that's making him drool without even seeing it--and hear the chimes of Massu singing and humming in the kitchen.

When Tegoshi enters the kitchen, Massu greets him with a giant smile and the sight makes Tegoshi's heart skip a beat.

"Welcome home!" Massu chimes.

"Thanks," Tegoshi returns with as bright a smile he can manage. "It's kinda nice coming home to the smell of food. I think I could get used to it."

Massu laughs, his eyes twinkling. But the words strike true inside of Tegoshi. Maybe, just maybe Ryo and Shige were right--like hell he'd tell them though.

Welcome to Heartbreak - Kame/Shige [PG-13]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 06:39:52 GMT

Welcome to Heartbreak
tinyangl, 2817 words
Kame/Shige. Kame doesn't know how he got to the point that when he turns around all he sees is loneliness.
A/N: Written for maya_morning for my holiday meme! Prompt was Welcome to Heartbreak. A song that Sarah managed to get stuck in my head after writing this. (I totally recommend it to other people too. :D)

i. Verse 1.

Kame doesn't regret anything in his life, not that he would ever let himself. He worked hard to get where he was, made decisions that he was happy with and got him where he was now. He honestly had no qualms with what he'd done.

Except he doesn't know when he turned around and realized that somehow in the span of five, ten, fifteen years, everyone had all grown up and expanded--wives, children, families. (Husbands, lovers, affairs, pets, houses.) He doesn't know if he wishes he had the same kind of thing himself, or if he just wishes he suddenly doesn't feel so lonely. Kame doesn't let himself think on this for too long.

"Hey, let's go out to drink tonight," Kame invites the others after a shooting of KAT-TUN IV Every1 (the third reincarnation of their previous Cartoon KAT-TUN).

Jin and Koki wave to him from the door as they say that they're going home to their respective families. Junno apologizes, saying he had a tournament to get to that evening--his billiards career having taken off about six years ago. Ueda says that he has to get to bed, he has an early match the next morning--his boxing career having taken off more than eight years ago. And even though Kame looks at Nakamaru with a hint of plea in his eyes--something Kame doesn't do often--Nakamaru apologizes weakly, mumbling something about a date that evening.

Kame suddenly realizes why he doesn't invite them out anymore.

ii. Chorus.

Kame's nursing a glass in his hands as he sighs, thinking that maybe he's gotten a little to old for this kind of life if he's already wanting to call it quits and just go home after only one glass. Kame shakes his head, refusing to think on it and drains the rest of his glass, asking for a refill. The bartender gives him a small smile, doing as he's asked and placing a glass of water to the right of Kame's drink.

Kame gives him a thankful smile before taking another sip of his drink, sighing.

"Kamenashi-kun?" the sudden and surprised voice asks from behind him. Kame turns to see Shige sliding into the stool next to him, eyebrows scrunched together in curiosity.

"Kato-kun," Kame returns, frowning. Last he remembered, Shige had a wife--young too, half Shige's age, something that hadn't been so openly accepted by the public--that he probably had at home waiting for him. "What are you doing here?"

Shige chuckles, ordering his usual with the bartender--Kame wonders what it means that Shige actually has a usual. "I asked you first," he says easily, his drink already in his hands. Shige takes a drink and Kame watches as he swallows, grimacing slightly and then sighing.

"No, you didn't," Kame snorts. "All you said was my name and left it at that."

"It was implied," Shige returns, twirling his straw in his glass. Kame thinks the sound of ice hitting glass has never sounded so entrancing as it does then.

"I never took you as the type to avoid questions." Kame quirks his eyebrows at Shige only laughs lightly, holding up his glass to Kame.

"There are many things you don't know about me, Kamenashi-kun," he replies, a twinge of bitterness in his voice as he turns to stare at a point in front of him. Kame blinks, then exhales.

He doesn't press the issue.

iii. Verse 2.

Kame doesn't go back the next night--mainly because the next morning told him what a bad idea the last evening had been. But he does show up the night after, and it says something when Kame already expects to see Shige's back facing him as he enters the bar.

The chime of the door alerts Shige and as soon as Kame enters, Shige's eyes catch his. He raises his already half-empty glass to Kame with a nod and swallows the remaining contents.

Kame chuckles slightly as he shrugs out of his jacket, hanging it on one of the hooks near the front before sliding into the seat he used the last time. "Already getting started?" he asks after he calls the bartender over, giving his order.

Shige smirks. "Not going to wait for people who show up late to the party." He clinks his glass against Kame's drink that already appeared without giving Kame even enough time to breathe.

"Depends when the party starts," Kame points out, taking a sip and sighing.

"I guess mine starts earlier than most," Shige says, chuckling slightly. The edges of his eyes are downcast, Kame notes all of a sudden, and his cheeks are already red from all the alcohol--a red that's spread to the edges of his ears and over his nose. Kame suddenly wonders how early Shige's really talking about.

Another part of him remembers suddenly with clarity the controversy over Shige getting married to his much too young co-star--they'd seemed happy in every interview they'd given though, but Kame knew better than anyone how happiness looked just on the surface.

"You can ask, you know."

Kame blinks at Shige, startled. "What?"

"I do have a wife," Shige mumbles, his head dropping to stare into his newly filled glass like it'll give him all the answers and all the questions and just anything he thinks of.

Swallowing, Kame combs a hand through his hair. "Where is she?" Kame asks, trying to gather his thoughts together.

"Home," Shige replies with ease before taking a sip of his drink.

A beat. "Why aren't you home then?" Kame asks, after gathering much of his courage.

Shige turns to look at him, eyes filled with tears that wouldn't fall. "Because I'm not the one she's waiting for." He gives Kame a crooked and painful smile before cocking his head to the side, raising his glass up to Kame for the third time that night.

Kame stares and can't wipe the sight of Shige's face from his head for the next week (or two--Kame's lost track). A part of him is glad he's never fallen in love for this reason--for that moment when love just stops. He only wishes that he doesn't suddenly feel so lonely when he actually thinks that.

iv. Chorus.

Kame falls into this routine of meeting Shige at the bar after work every night--no matter how late because more often than not, Shige's sitting at the bar, waiting for him with a filled glass of whatever he drank. So when Shige doesn't show up one evening, Kame feels so awkward sitting there by himself that when the bartender asks him--with this half-smile that looks more tinged with sadness than with glee--if he wants a refill, Kame refuses and leaves the bar without a second glance.

He hops on the train, his thoughts filled with how Shige's suddenly taken up a large part of his life--it's not a proper night until he's sitting with Shige talking about how the sky is blue to whether or not they regret becoming idols. His thoughts turn over in his head as the train lulls him to a slow and steady sleep.

Kame dreams of a life with Shige--not the life they have now, but a strangely domestic life with them living together (or at least that's what Kame figures). They move around in the kitchen, dressed in aprons that have their names emblazoned across the front (Kame thinks it's a bit of a dorky idea, but most of him thinks that it was probably him who had the idea in the first place). Their knees knock against each other as they move from one side to the other, laughing as Shige stumbles and spills some flour onto the floor. Kame continues to laugh until Shige thumbs a streak of flour on his cheek and that just calls for payback to Kame.

They're talking at the dinner table, smiles and laughter behind glasses of water--no need for alcohol in their lives after all--and plates that are piled with home-cooked food (when was the last time Kame had home-cooked food for that matter?) and more laughter that bounces off the walls and echoes in Kame's mind for days on end.

Kame dreams of Shige's breath against his, lips pressed against the others' and hands fumbling through layers of clothes. Shige's mumbling something under his breath and pressed against Kame's skin that Kame can't quite catch, doesn't know if it's really that important. Shige's hand darts underneath Kame's shirt and cold on warm practically burns against his skin--imprints a mark that only Kame can remember. Kame squeezes his eyes shut, trying so hard to keep feeling as alive as he does right now. He gasps, only in the dream, still in the dream, and throws back his head as Shige presses kisses down his throat.

It's only the train jerking to a stop at the end of the line that finally wakes him up. Kame curses as he opens his eyes, realizing that he's far from his stop, too far from his stop. He sighs, shifting in his seat to get comfortable again and waiting for the train to start up again to go back around. He makes sure not to fall asleep, unsure of what he'd see behind his eyes, unsure if it was telling him what he wished for or what he should've had right now.

v. Bridge.

It's a week before Kame talks to Shige again, a week after Kame's last visit to the bar, a week after his dream. So when he picks up his phone to an unknown number--usually a bad idea in Kame's eyes--and finds Shige greeting him on the other end, it takes all of Kame's willpower not to hang up and pretend he hadn't heard Shige at all.

"Hey, Kamenashi-kun. I asked Yamashita-kun for your number. I hope you don't mind," Shige says with ease.

Kame closes his eyes, exhales, combs a hand through his hair before responding. "It's no problem, Kato-kun."

Shige chuckles on the other end. "I thought I told you to call me Shige."

"And I told you to call me Kame. See how well we follow orders," Kame jokes, heart thumping harshly in his chest. He's not sure why he's suddenly so nervous--no, he knows exactly why, but he doesn't know why he's taking his dream so seriously all of a sudden.

"I haven't seen you lately," Shige says; Kame can just imagine the frown on his lips as he does so.

Kame chuckles awkwardly. "Early mornings, gotta get my beauty sleep. You know how it is."

Shige laughs. "That's too bad! I miss having someone to talk to at the bar. It's kinda silly sitting there by myself just drinking."

"Haven't you been doing that for ages before?" Kame points out.

"And I felt silly back then. Nothing's changed." Kame can see Shige's crooked smile at this and somehow, that makes Kame's resolve break. He licks his lips.

"I don't know," Kame fumbles, trying to focus on an invisible speck in front of him that refuses to move, no matter how much he bats at the air.

Shige pauses on the other line. "Kamenashi-kun, did something happen? Did I do something?" There's a twinge of confusion in his voice that Kame doesn't blame him for having--Kame's a little confused himself.

"No, no you didn't," Kame finally says honestly--because it's the truth. It's all Kame, his paranoia, his confusion. He exhales. "I don't think I'll be going to the bar again." He tries to chuckle, but he wonders if it sounds as fake to Shige as it does to his own ears. "Too much alcohol, probably was a bad idea to go as often as I was."

"Oh," Shige says on the other line, voice catching. "Er. Okay, well, that's too bad, Kamenashi-kun. I was enjoying talking with you."

Kame licks his lips. "Yeah, to me too." There's a pause of awkward silence that makes Kame shut his eyes and exhale. "Listen, I have to get back to work. I'll, um. Later."

"Bye, Kamenashi-kun." Shige's voice is softer than Kame ever remembers. The ring tone echoes in his ear for another minute before Kame shuts his cell phone, his eyes catching his other members' eyes.

"What?" Kame snaps.

Jin gives him a soft smile, slightly sad. "Nothing," he says. A part of Kame wants him to expand on that, but he stamps down the desire and tells them that they should get back to work.

vi. Verse 3.

It's a couple of weeks before Kame suddenly realizes that all he's been doing is working, going home, sleeping, and then repeating the same thing the next day and then the next. Kame is at home, a bottle of beer in his hands and the imprint of his ass on his couch getting more and more defined. He feels really pathetic at this moment--lonely and craving for human interaction other than the usual people he worked with.

It's not as though staying away from Shige helped much of anything anyway. Kame still dreams of a life together with Shige, every night a possible scene of their life together--they range from something simple like just sitting down and fighting over the remote, to actual intimate scenes that Kame almost feels embarrassed for looking in on.

Each night though, the image of Shige gets fuzzier and fuzzier--like Kame's forgetting what Shige's like, what'd he say. Or maybe just the little stuff like the quirk of Shige's smile, the twinkle in his eye when Kame says something funny.

Kame curses himself in his head as he gets up off the couch, pulling on his jacket--thankful that he hadn't changed as soon as he'd gotten home. Without another thought, Kame makes his way to the bar at 1 in the morning, hoping that Shige will still be there, at the same time hoping that he won't be there.

He swings open the door and the bell chimes like it's always done before, and Kame sees a familiar back to him. Shige's talking animatedly to the bartender whose eyes quirk upwards when he sees Kame walk through the door.

The bartender nods in his direction and Kame freezes in his spot as Shige turns around slowly, his eyes meeting Kame's. Kame licks his lips as Shige's eyes light up with recognition, beaming as he stumbles off the stool and into Kame's arms.

"Kamenashi-kun!" Shige says bubbly, breath reeking of alcohol. "I didn't think I'd ever see you here again."

Kame chuckles awkwardly, leading Shige back to his seat and shouldering most of Shige's weight. "I didn't think I'd come back again," Kame says honestly.

Shige beams at him brightly, raising his glass to Kame. "A toast to Kame's return!"

Kame stares. "Haven't you drank enough already?"

"Never," Shige says with a chortle. "Not until after the divorce is finalized."

"What?" Kame starts, half choking around the sip he'd just taken. The alcohol burns twice as much on the way down.

Shige tilts his head to the side. "I didn't get to tell you, huh?" He laughs loudly. "I'm getting a divorce. Me. A Johnny's boy. Who thought something like this would ever happen."

"I--" Kame swallows hard. "But why?"

"I told you, didn't I, Kamenashi-kun? I wasn't the one she was waiting for at home." Shige throws back his head and Kame suddenly gets very vivid images of him kissing a line down his throat; Kame blinks.

"Oh."

Shige smiles at him, even his eyes are glimmering at this point. Kame wonders if he has enough self-restraint not to take Shige right now and just do what he's been dreaming of for weeks. Kame licks his lips. "So-" he starts.

Shige yawns exaggeratedly cutting Kame off completely, throwing his hand over his mouth and then stumbling off the stool. His other hand tugs on Kame's arm and he leans into Kame's grasp. "Ne," he murmurs. "Can I crash at your place? I think it's too late to go to Koyama's. His family's probably already asleep."

Kame's eyebrows furrow. "So why were you here so late?"

Shige chuckles, looking up at Kame. "Out of hope."

A beat before Kame gives Shige a shaky smile, hoping that with how close Shige is, he can't feel the pounding of Kame's heart. "Sure. You can crash at my place." Shige beams up at him and Kame thinks he had no real self-restraint to begin with.

vii. Chorus.

Of course they don't come together easily; it's not that Kame likes to complicate things, it's just that he thinks everything through--almost everything anyway. Shige has to go through his divorce first before he officially moves into Kame's (he'd only been crashing--not living), before Kame even thinks to make a move on Shige.

It's the second after Shige gets the phone call from his lawyer saying that he's a divorcee that Kame turns to Shige and presses his lips against his. When Kame pulls back, Shige sighs and shakes his head. "Took you long enough, you know."

Kame frowns. "Shut up, you weren't single till just now."

Quirking an eyebrow, Shige chuckles. "The things you focus on."

"The things you don't," Kame retorts, eyes burning a hole into the television in front of them. Shige leans against Kame's shoulder, a faint smile pressed against his shirt. Kame thinks suddenly that it's better late than never. He smiles again, his fingers tangling with Shige's.

Love At First Sight - Tegomassuki, Massu/Maki [PG]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 06:00:25 GMT

Love at First Sight
tinyangl, 1012 words
Tegomassuki, Massu/Maki. Massu originally went to Tegoshi's set to visit Tegoshi. The second time was for Maki.
A/N: Written for cynicalism for my holiday meme! Her prompt was "tegomassuki meeting on the set of tegomaki's movie; love at first sight; some things transcend time and space and universes; kismet."

i. love at first sight.

Massu visits the first time because he's being supportive after Tegoshi dropped by his set, with bentos and drinks for him and Nakamaru. In return, he arrives with bentos and drinks for only him and Tegoshi (because, well, there is nobody else he knows there).

He shows up when they're in the middle of filming some scene and Massu laughs when he looks into the monitor and watches as Tegoshi's character calls after Maki's character--a little insistent. It's a little off-putting to watch Tegoshi act, like it wasn't Tegoshi to begin with. Which only made Massu think that Tegoshi is a good actor to be able to pull that off.

At least that's what he is thinking until Maki's character turns around and something about the look on Maki's face makes Massu freeze up. She's talking, saying something that Massu can't quite hear or understand--is that even Japanese?--and all Massu can do is stare, watch as her eyes well up with tears, the wind blows her hair away from her eyes, only giving Massu a clearer view.

If Tegoshi makes Massu feel like he's looking at a slightly different Tegoshi--with his glasses and his student uniform--Maki makes him feel like he's just interrupting a really private moment between two people--friends, lovers, something that Massu couldn't pin down.

It startles him when a second later the director yells, "Cut!" and the magic seems to fade before his eyes. Maki wipes away her tears with the back of her hand as Tegoshi walks over to her, saying something with a smile. Massu watches as Maki giggles--the corners of her eyes quirk, her lips form a smile and she says something back to Tegoshi cheerfully as they start to walk down the school steps.

Tegoshi introduces her as "Maki-chan."

"Hi! Masuda-kun, right? Tegoshi's told me a lot about you," Maki greets, bowing slightly. Her smile brightens and her eyes seem to shine from tears that hadn't fallen.

She takes his breath away for a second time.

ii. some things transcend time and space and universes.

If he's honest with himself, Massu drops by the second and third time just for Maki--even though he makes extra sure that Tegoshi's around when he does drop by. Any other time would just be weird. It takes a while for her to warm to him like she's already done with Tegoshi, but that's to be expected.

Massu doesn't want to admit it, but the sight of Tegoshi and Maki chatting easily before they're about to film a scene together makes something turn over in his stomach. He tries his best to be nice, but he finds himself stumbling through his own words, trying to meet her eyes but failing horribly as a flush breaks out on his face.

"Ne, Maki-chan!" Tegoshi says cheerfully as they're eating their lunch--with bentos Massu brought for all three of them. "You're free tomorrow, right? No filming?"

Maki blinks up at Tegoshi, chopsticks against her lips as she thinks. "No, it's a rare day off. I think they're filming Matsuyama-kun's scenes tomorrow."

"Great! It's my date day with Massu. You should join us!"

Maki's gaze falls on Massu's and all he can focus on is the way her eyelashes move as she blinks. "Is that okay?"

Massu chuckles awkwardly, brushing away an invisible piece of rice from his face before nodding. "Yeah! Only if you don't mind spending it with us." He flushes. "I'm not exactly the best person to shop with."

Maki laughs lightly, throws her head back and her hair shifts just enough to give Massu a good look at her throat--Massu blinks, his flush deepening. "I'd be more than happy to, Tegoshi-kun! I think that'll be fun."

"Me too!" Tegoshi cheers. "Great! You'll definitely have fun." Tegoshi adds a little nod and a fist pump in the air as though that'll prove his point. Maki giggles again, covering her mouth with her hand.

"Un," Massu finds himself saying, the grin unmistakable from his face. "I think it'll be fun."

Maki smiles in his direction.

iii. kismet

Massu tries hard to remember to act normally--except then that begs the question, "What is normal?" All he can think about is how Maki's walking down the street between him and Tegoshi; her shoulder brushes against his every now and then, and Massu feels himself notice each and every bump, even though he can't feel much of anything with all the layers of clothes they have on.

They end up at karaoke after a few hours of shopping--shopping where Massu ended up getting absolutely nothing since he didn't want to really spend too much time at a store and have Maki (and he supposed Tegoshi too) be completely bored waiting around for him.

He loosens up a little at karaoke--there's something to be said about purposely singing badly that makes someone just forget whatever else they're thinking about.

Massu's breathless after one of his songs, slumping back down on the couch with his head tilted back. Maki laughs, sitting next to him, shaking her head. "You don't normally sing like that, do you?"

"I wouldn't have much of a career as an idol," Massu jokes--although there's some truth, some lie in that one statement.

She giggles just as Tegoshi tugs on her arm. "Maki-chan! Sing this one with me!"

Massu watches as Maki nods happily, grabbing Massu's arm too and tugging him upwards. "Sing it too, Masuda-kun!"

Massu grins, standing up, leaning close to tell her. "It's Massu."

Maki jerks her head towards him, blinking up at him with wide eyes. "Eh?"

"Massu. You don't have to call me Masuda-kun," Massu says with what he feels is ease--even if his stomach turns as he's saying it.

Maki blinks again--her eyelashes so close that he can count them again. "Okay," she says finally. "And you can call me Maki-chan. I mean, if you'd like," she stumbles at the very end.

Massu beams; his cheeks are starting to hurt now. "I'd like that."

Tegoshi yells into the microphone at that moment. "I don't hear singing!"

Massu and Maki exchange looks, laughing before picking up their microphones and joining Tegoshi, sides pressed against each other as they belt out the theme song to Hanazakari no Kimitachi e.

Karaoke Date - Tegoshi/Yamapi [PG]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 05:46:51 GMT

Karaoke Date
tinyangl, 404 words
Tegoshi/Yamapi. Tegoshi writes a message to Yamapi in a magazine that they should go out to karaoke together--Yamapi's more than happy to make that come true.
A/N: Written for anamuan for my holiday meme! It's sad how made of fail this is. Based on this translation.

Yamapi hears loud and clear--as loud and clear as text can be anyway--Tegoshi's message to him. He also sees the really cutesy pose Tegoshi and laughs a little to himself.

He opens up his cell phone and punches in his message, asking Tegoshi out to karaoke the next day. It doesn't even take a minute before his phone goes off, alerting him to a new message.

"From: Tegoshi
To: Yamashita

Ehhhhh?! O_O Really? Yamashita-kun's asking me?
That's great! ♥♥ I'd love to go to karaoke! ♥♥
Can we have lunch before too?"

Yamapi shakes his head, laughs a little, and then punches his reply that sure, he wouldn't mind having lunch before.

Tegoshi's reply has multiple hearts and a single "Yamashita-kun will treat, ne?"

It's so innocent that Yamapi doesn't feel bad replying that he'd definitely treat Tegoshi.

--

Not surprising, Tegoshi ends up being something of a microphone hog--not that Yamapi minds just sitting back and listening. (Although it was a little embarrassing when Tegoshi chose Love Song as one of his picks and then urged Yamapi to join him.)

"Yamashita-kun," Tegoshi muses as he's flilpping through pages. "You haven't picked a song for a while."

Yamapi laughs, taking a sip of his water. "It's okay. You're having fun, aren't you?"

Tegoshi grins, nodding. "Yeah! I like spending time with Yamashita-kun. But I don't want you to just sit there and listen. Sing sing!"

Picking a random song that he vaguely knows, Yamapi punches in the number, shaking his head. "Okay, okay. If you insist." Tegoshi grins, cheering a little as Yamapi starts, first kinda low before picking up as Tegoshi joins in, swaying along to the music.

Yamapi's a little startled when he realizes he relishes a little in the warmth of Tegoshi pressed against his side.

--

Tegoshi's the one who updates NEWSmile next and with it, he mentions that he'd gone out with Yamapi.

"Yamashita-kun treated me to food and karaoke! ♥♥
It was really amazing. :O Let's go again, Yamashita-kun!"

Yamapi chuckles a little before updating his own j-web.

"Today, I went out with Tegoshi!
Somehow, he got me to pay for him.
But that's okay.
Tegoshi's really loud! This time, it was okay.
This was fun, ne.
We should go again.
Maybe next time, we can go with the others too."

A few seconds later--it really surprises Yamapi how quickly Tegoshi responds--Yamapi's cell phone goes off and Tegoshi's cheerful "That's a good idea, Yamashita-kun!" with his multiple hearts is his reply.

Yamapi shakes his head before punching in a response. He really wouldn't mind another outing.

Crushing - Koyama/Yamapi [PG]

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 05:41:51 GMT

Crushing
tinyangl, 1502 words
Koyama/Yamapi. Yamapi's crush on Koyama is starting to annoy Ryo. To the point that Ryo just takes things in his own hands.
A/N: Written for crystallekil for my holiday meme!

Yamapi thought his fascination with Koyama was starting to get a little ridiculous. He didn't remember ever staring as Koyama would enter the room, face a little flushed from the cold as he unwrapped his scarf, each turn revealing a little bit more of his neck that Yamapi hadn't seen before. Yamapi swallowed when Koyama would shrug off his heavy coat, then throw his head back in laughter over something Shige said. Then Koyama would comb a hand through his hair, giving it that fussy look without looking too messy and Yamapi wondered if it'd be weird if he reached over to pat it down and make it neat again.

"Your mouth's open," Ryo snorted beside him.

Yamapi flushed, looking over. "Shut up."

"Seriously. Googly eyes are not attractive on you."

Yamapi frowned. "I was not making--"

"Yes, yes you were," Ryo interrupted. "And when are you going to get over yourself and just ask him out? It's getting annoying watching you puppy worship him."

"I am not--"

"Yes, yes you are," Ryo cut in again. Yamapi frowned at him. "At this rate, we're going to have to do something for you guys. And you do not want Tegoshi planning."

Yamapi paled. "There's nothing to plan anyway. It's just a passing thing."

"What is?" Yamapi's head turned to see Koyama blinking at them curiously. Ryo withheld a laugh--kinda, sorta. Not at all. All that was missing was the pointing.

"Um. The idea that I could be a doctor," Yamapi blurted out, the first thing that he could think of.

Koyama blinked. "Well, you could if you really wanted it. It'd be a little tough, ne?"

Yamapi chuckled awkwardly. "Um, yeah. I don't think I could deal with all the studying."

Koyama beamed brightly. "Whatever you think is good." With that, Koyama moved over to Tegoshi, asking if the younger boy wanted some tea or anything. Yamapi watched, then let out a sigh of relief.

"Yeah, you're not crushing," Ryo said after a minute of silence.

"Shut up," Yamapi snapped.

--

Yamapi couldn't understand why this was so awkward for him. Sure, he'd had his crushes--males and females, he didn't mind either--but something about this made Yamapi squelch at the idea of actually making any "move" on Koyama.

"If you tell me that he's the one, I am going to hit you," Ryo said as Yamapi, Ryo, and Jin played Mario Kart, sitting on Yamapi's couch.

Yamapi rolled his eyes. "Dramatic much? It's nothing like that."

"Maybe it's because you work with him?" Jin suggested, leaning to the right as he tried to make a turn on the screen.

"That sounds logical. I'm impressed, Bakanishi," Ryo replied, right after he pumped his fist in the air, winning first in the race.

Jin stuck his tongue out, winning second. "I have my moments."

"Mm," Yamapi said distractedly as his car scored tenth place. Ryo and Jin exchanged glances before shaking their heads.

"Again?" Jin asked.

"Yeah, I've never beaten Pi so many times before."

Yamapi made another noise, too distracted in his own thoughts to even protest.

--

Koyama was the one that approached him. "Yamapi, are you free for dinner tomorrow?"

It took a second before Yamapi realized the thunk that came after the question didn't have anything to do with Koyama and more to do with the bottle of water that he had been holding. Yamapi flushed, picking up the bottle before standing back up to meet Koyama's expecting gaze. "Um, I. Yes?"

Koyama beamed--a sight that made Yamapi's stomach turn--and cheerfully said, "Great! I'll tell Ryo-chan that you said yes too."

Yamapi blinked. "Eh?"

"Ryo suggested we all have dinner together. Shige and Tegoshi both have tests to study for and Massu said something about filming, but if it's just the three of us, that's okay, right?" Koyama counted off the members with his fingers, as though he would forget one of them if he wasn't careful.

"Right," Yamapi echoed. Koyama beamed again before heading to the other half of the room, just as Ryo popped up beside him. Yamapi blinked at his sudden appearance before his mind caught up with him and he started to say, "You're not--"

"Don't worry, I'll find some way to get out of it. So you and your crush can be alone at dinner. Don't waste this," Ryo said warningly.

Yamapi blinked. "Wait, this was for me?"

Ryo sighed, hanging his head. "Pi, I never figured you to be this slow." Yamapi frowned. "Just enjoy yourself. You still know how to have a date, right?"

Yamapi's frown deepened. "Shut up. I don't need your help with that too."

"Are you sure? I can give you some pointers." Yamapi rolled his eyes, shoving Ryo.

"Shut up, ass. I can take it from here."

"You'd better. I don't want to deal anymore with your fawning."

Yamapi rolled his eyes again.

--

It's not that Yamapi's nervous or anything. It just so happens that his water spilled a little; he dropped a bit of rice on his lap and tried to brush it off discretely but only served to spill more water onto the table; he accidentally flung his head back too far when he was laughing at some story Koyama told that he knocked into a passing waiter and got more water spilled down his front.

Yamapi declared that he was breaking ties with water from now on.

Koyama laughed, commenting that that would be a little difficult, before pulling out his keys and opening the lock to his apartment, the closest to the restaurant. "It's too bad Ryo-chan's not here. He missed out."

"While I'm thankful because I can just imagine the comments," Yamapi grumbled, trying to focus more on the fact that his shirt was dripping wet and he needed dry clothes than the fact that he was currently standing in Koyama's place after what seemed like a date--embarrassing moments and all.

Koyama grinned. "Isn't that half the fun?" he threw over his shoulder before disappearing into his bedroom. Yamapi sighed, removing his jacket and placing it neatly over some chair. Koyama walked out a second later, his jacket gone and the flush on his face from the cold still there, and a shirt in his hands. "Here you go. It'll be warmer in this than in that. I'll put it in the wash." Koyama grinned again.

It's not like Yamapi had never been shirtless in front of Koyama, but as he stripped off his outer shirt and shrugged into the new shirt Koyama'd given him, something about Koyama's unmoving gaze made him go red. "Thanks," he said, just to break the silence. "I'll make sure to give it back to you." Yamapi made a move to grab his jacket and in his mind, he had all his actions mapped out, just for safety's sake (he couldn't risk looking like an idiot even more).

Halfway to the door, Koyama's "Is that how you end every date?" stopped Yamapi in his tracks. Slowly, Yamapi turned on his heel to face Koyama who was leaning against one of his chairs, arms folded and an eyebrow quirked upwards.

"Huh?" Yamapi said articulately.

"You don't usually end dates just by going, "Bye, thanks for everything." and leave, do you?"

"This was a date?"

"Wasn't it?" Koyama replied back with an easy smile. "It was a nice one."

Yamapi stared. Paused. Tried to think of something to say, but only managed helplessly. "I didn't think you knew it was a date."

"Ryo-chan was nice enough to let me know what this meant to you," Koyama said, starting to walk towards Yamapi, the smile never leaving his face.

"Ah," Yamapi replied, the only thing he could think to say, other than thoughts and plans to murder Ryo in his sleep.

"So was this a date?" Koyama asked again, in front of Yamapi now. Yamapi exhaled, then realized that he could count Koyama's eyelashes if he so as pleased. His heart skipped a beat.

"Do you want it to be a date?" Yamapi asked, licking his lips.

Koyama laughed, eyes twinkling as he does so. "Yeah. I do."

Yamapi exhaled again. "Good," he muttered just as he leaned in, pressing his lips lightly against Koyama's. As he pulled back, he felt Koyama's eyes flutter closed and Koyama sighed against his lips.

"Proper ending to a date," Koyama mused, eyes opening.

Yamapi grinned. "Not until we finalize a second date."

"Tomorrow night?"

"Now it's a proper ending."

--

Yamapi punched Ryo in the shoulder the next time he saw him (the next day).

"Ow! What was that for?" Ryo snapped, hand clutching his arm.

"For telling Koyama everything," Yamapi retorted.

"Well, if I didn't, then nothing would get done." Ryo grinned, wagging his eyebrows. "Did anything get done?"

"Stop that," Yamapi said, trying to block out just Ryo's eyebrows with his hand. "And stop being so crude."

"Don't tell me I have to teach you that too," Ryo sighed.

Yamapi rolled his eyes just as Koyama walked into the room, unraveling his scarf. Koyama's eyes caught Yamapi's and suddenly, Yamapi felt like whatever Ryo was doing, talking, whatever-ing didn't have anything to do with him.

"Oh God, I get you two together and still you're annoying as shit. What will it take?" Ryo whined.

"Shut up," Yamapi snapped again before walking towards Koyama. They had plans to finalize after all.

Pulled Along By Love - Yamapi/Abiru Yuu [PG-13]

Mon, 05 Jan 2009 19:00:20 GMT

Pulled Along By Love. Part 2
tinyangl, 11610 words
Yamashita Tomohisa/Abiru Yuu, Hints of Tanaka Koki/Abiru Yuu, Issa (from Da Pump)/Abiru Yuu, and Yamashita Tomohisa/Kitagawa Keiko, Yamapi has a routine—even if he doesn't quite realize it himself—that Yuu really wishes she hadn't figured out herself. So when he brings her to Hawaii yet again, she doesn't know if she should hope that she's wrong or just accept what's to come.
A/N: Written to the prompt T&T's Venus for fic_games. All information about Abiru Yuu and her relationships is from Wiki or the various rumors all over the place – most from uwasako. As such, I took lots and lots of liberties. Lol Thanks to silver_rose88 for reading this over on multiple takes as it was being written and letting me know her opinion. As well as cynicalism for always listening to me whine away about this. You're both loved dearly. ♥♥♥

October 2008.

"Had a good day shopping?" Yamapi comments as soon as Yuu walks through the door. He smiles at her from the balcony, cigarette in hand.

"What do the bags tell you?" Yuu smirks, putting them off to the side of their table.

"That you probably spent way too much money."

Yuu laughs, walking out onto the balcony and standing next to him. "What are you doing back already? Aren't you usually out doing... something else?"

Yamapi raises an eyebrow. "Know my schedule or something?"

"Or something." Yuu tries hard to keep the bitterness from her voice―she succeeds.

"What'd you get?" Yamapi asks, taking a drag from his cigarette.

Yuu laughs. "Are you really curious or are you just trying to find something to talk about?"

"Probably the second one, but why not?" he asks, turning around to lean his back against the railing, looking at Yuu face to face.

She laughs again. "I'm not sure that's really a conversation getter, 'Hisa." She pauses before adding something else abruptly, Erika's voice echoing in her head all of a sudden. "Why are we in Hawaii, Tomohisa?"

Yamapi freezes, blinking back at her. "What?"

Yuu only repeats herself. "Why are we in Hawaii?" She sighs, leaning against the balcony railing and refusing to look Yamapi in the eye. "We never come to Hawaii just because. Something must've happened―maybe at work, maybe at home. Probably at work though. I'm betting they want you to break up with me again. A new year, a new attempt," Yuu said sardonically.

"Yuu," Yamapi starts, before pausing, throwing his cigarette butt on the ground and stomping it out then turning back around to look out at the Hawaiian coast. "It's not-"

"Don't," Yuu snaps, suddenly exhausted. "If you're going to lie to me and tell me it wasn't the Jimusho, I'm not hearing it."

"They want me to break up with you, yes," Yamapi finally says, sounding just as tired. "But that's not why-"

Yuu interrupts him again. "Figures." She pushes away from the railing and heads back inside their hotel room, fuming. "Just get it over with then."

"Yuu!" Yamapi groans, following behind her. "I am not here to break up with you!"

Yuu spins around, abruptly stopping in front of Yamapi. "Really?" she asks. "May 2006. We went to Hawaii on vacation. End of it, you broke up with me. February 2007. I was in Hawaii for a shoot, you came over, then at the end of the week, guess what? Broke up with me. November 2007, you were there for work, invited me over, and oh, look at that, broke up with me." Yuu crosses her arms. "And hey, where are we right now?"

Yamapi stares at her, and for a moment there, Yuu wonders if he's even heard a word she's said. "I'm not here to break up with you," he says again.

Yuu stares at him, incredulous. "You're still saying that?"

"You're jumping to conclusions." He sounds calm―too calm.

"Look, Tomohisa," Yuu starts. "Once is an occurrence, twice is a coincidence. Three times is a fucking pattern. You have no right to tell me that I'm jumping to conclusions."

"I'm not here to break up with you," Yamapi only repeats.

Yuu stares. "You're fucking ridiculous," she snaps, suddenly hearing Erika's voice instead of her own.

"And you have no faith in me," Yamapi snaps―Yuu doesn't want to admit that she's actually glad that he's pissed, but she is because if he reacts, that means she's actually affected him in some way.

"I do. Until you decide, 'Oh hey! Let's drop everything and go to Hawaii!'" Yuu crosses her arms. "Then it gets a little questionable. And I was okay, absolutely okay to just take whatever happened. Even hoped for the best, but now I'm tired. And you're trying to act like everything's normal when we both know it's not." Yuu sighs. "Just. Forget it," Yuu presses her fingers against her forehead. "Just. Just get it over with, 'Hisa."

"No," Yamapi says simply, looking her in the eye. "I'm not breaking up with you." Without another word, he walks out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

Yuu sighs, pressing her fingers against the side of her forehead again before crashing at the couch and turning on the television. She tries to stay up as late as she can, but she's asleep before she knows it and Yamapi never comes back―at least not while she's awake.

---

January 2008.

"Yuu, are you okay?" Erika asked as Yuu's manager, Ayase, sat Yuu down on Erika's couch.

Yuu giggled before teetering over in her seat. "I'm great," she mumbles against the pillow. Her manager sighed before passing Erika, Yuu's handbag.

"She got trashed before the show and they kicked her out," Ayase said frowning.

Erika looked down at her best friend who was drooling on one of her favorite pillows. "She's in trouble, isn't she?"

"Look, you've gone through this―no offense―but can you let her know what to expect? I have to go back to the office and do some damage control." Before Erika (or the snoozing Yuu) could say anything, Ayase was already out the door.

Erika frowned as she tossed Yuu's bag off to the side and moved to grab some sheets for her friend, throwing them over her. Just as Erika's about to leave the room, Yuu's phone went off―Tackey & Tsubasa's Venus muffled inside her handbag. Erika froze, staring at the bag before pulling out the cellphone and checking the caller ID.

"Don't pick it up," Yuu moaned from the couch.

Erika didn't, but the song still played―at least for another minute before the phone shut off. "The Great Listener―Yamapi?" Erika asked.

"It's an old joke," Yuu sighed, hand over her eyes. Erika walked over to her couch, crouching down to Yuu's level. "I never changed it."

"Why is he calling now?"

Yuu snorted. "Like I know."

The phone beeped, signaling a new voice mail and Yuu tried hard to fight off the headache. "He left a message," Erika said plainly.

"I can tell. I don't really need you to explain things to me. I'm drunk, not dumbed down," Yuu snapped. Erika snorted before passing Yuu her phone and standing back up to walk towards the kitchen. Yuu stared at her phone before sighing and biting the bullet, listening to her message.

"Yuu―" Yamapi started on the other line. "Abiru-chan," he said, correcting himself. "I just. I heard about what happened earlier today, and I just. I wanted to see if you were doing okay. See if you're feeling better." Yuu snorted loudly as Erika placed a glass of water at the side table before walking away, leaving Yuu to herself. "I don't―" Yamapi paused. "I don't want our breaking up to cause any trouble, so I'm. I'm just sorry for everything."

Yuu hung up, not even sure if she'd finished the message―but she didn't care anymore. She chucked the phone across the room, not sure where it landed, but not hearing a noise either so she didn't think it broke. She just drank her water and let herself fall back into sleep―a sleep where her stupid deeds didn't exist and where she wasn't miserable just hearing the sound of Yamapi's voice.

---

October 2008.

"Yuu."

Yuu groans loudly as she's shaken awake. When she opens up her eyes, Yamapi stares back at her, smiling as he sweeps the hair from her eyes. She suddenly feels like it's back to the beginning of the week again. "'Hisa?" she mumbles.

"Hey, was just worried that you wouldn't get some food in you before the flight," Yamapi says softly.

Yuu blinks up at him and exhales. "You know, I'm still mad at you," she catches his gaze as he chuckles.

"And I told you that I'm not going to do what you think I am."

"We'll see," she mumbles before she pushes the sheets out of the way and grabs some clothes on her way towards the bathroom. "Let me go get ready for this breakfast that you so anxiously woke me up for."

"Eggs and pancakes!" Yamapi calls out. "Perfect American breakfast, don't you think?"

Yuu shakes her head as she brushes her teeth―she doesn't know why she's pretending that everything's okay.

"Hey, are you packed already?"

"Why do you sound surprised?" Yuu yells from inside the bathroom, fixing up her hair and putting on her make-up.

"You're just not usually that prompt," Yamapi comments as he approaches the bathroom, leaning against the doorway.

Yuu shrugs. He didn't need to know that she went to sleep horribly late waiting for him, and to pass the time, packing had been one of her choices. When she finishes, she turns to face him, her long hair whipping behind her in a ponytail. "So where's this pity meal?"

Yamapi frowns at her. "I told you―"

Yuu leans forward, brushing his hair from his face. "Then answer my question. Why are we in Hawaii?"

"Because I wanted to propose."

Yuu jerks backwards, stumbling over the thankfully closed toilet seat and landing on her ass. "What?" she asks, looking up at him in stunned awe.

Yamapi sighs, refusing to meet her eyes. "You really know how to ruin a guy's plans." He drops to a knee, hand reaching inside his pocket to grab a black velveted box.

"'Hisa," Yuu starts, eyes wide. "What―"

"I can't tell the world I'm going out with you, at least not yet. I can't even tell them that I'm in love with someone right now. But if you know, if just you know that I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you, I'm happy." Yamapi opens the jewelry box and Yuu stares at a glittering pink diamond―a ring, an engagement ring. "The Jimusho did tell me to break up with you―they want us to break up, always have. But I told them that this time, this time would be different."

Yuu can't really speak, doesn't know what to say. "I-" she starts again before her voice leaves her. "In the bathroom?" she finally manages.

Yamapi blinks. "What?"

"You're proposing in the bathroom?"

"Well, I was going to propose at breakfast but then you got antsy, and I got nervous. Then I felt bad about everything I put you through and guilty. And I didn't want you mad anymore. And-" Yamapi stumbles as Yuu throws herself on him, arms wrapped around his neck.

"You're so stupid," Yuu hisses, trying to blink back her tears. "So fucking stupid."

Yamapi laughs, hugging her tightly. "Is that a yes?"

"No, you idiot. I'm not hugging you because I'm about to say we should break up." Yuu pauses. "Oh, I could be. But I'm not. I'm not saying no."

Yamapi grins against her skin. "At least now, Hawaii won't make you think something's wrong. Because I will be taking you here more times than you can count."

Yuu laughs. "You're still an idiot."

"An idiot you're agreeing to marry. Doesn't that make you an idiot too?"

"Probably." Yuu pulls back. "But I don't mind." She presses her lips against his, her arms around his neck.

---

July 2008 .

"Yuu."

Yuu turned around, the smile dropping from her face as she stared into the face of her boy―ex-boyfriend. "Tomohisa," she blinked, clutching onto her handbag. Of all the places to run into him, she really hadn't expected it to be the nearby shopping area. "What-What are you doing here?"

Yamapi laughed. "It's a mall―what do you think?"

Yuu berated herself for such a dumb question. "Right. Um, well, it's nice to see you," she said abruptly, waving bye to him before turning on her heel―wanting nothing more than to get out of there as fast as she could.

"Wait!" Yamapi called out, reaching out to grab her arm. "I. I want to talk to you."

Yuu frowned as she turned around. "I don't see why―"

"You changed your number," Yamapi said plainly, letting go. "I couldn't call you anymore and nobody would tell me it."

"I wonder why," Yuu snorted. "After the last break-up..."

"Yuu, we've broken up before," Yamapi murmured. "Why was this time different?"

"Because this time, it wasn't your choice. It was your stupid Jimusho that decided. And the day you let them decide something like our relationship, that's when I thought us breaking ties completely was what had to happen." Yuu crossed her arms.

Yamapi stared at her, then looked around, suddenly realizing where they were. "Look, can't we talk about this someplace else? We're kinda public."

"No," Yuu snapped. "There's nothing else to say, so I don't see why I should go anywhere with you."

"Because," Yamapi insisted. "Because I want to apologize. To tell you that I'm sorry for all the shit I pulled, for giving in when everything just got too much. To tell you that I still care, and that you're on my mind, and that I'm sorry for everything."

Yuu blinked, a little more than stunned. "I-"

"So can we talk?" he asked, more urgent.

Yuu stared, felt her heart pound at the idea of falling back into this―of the hurt she felt in the last break-up, of all the comments she got behind her back, of everything―just for this one guy that she knew she loved despite it all. "Okay," she found herself saying. "Fine, I'll listen, but no guarantees."

"I wouldn't expect there to be," Yamapi murmured, hands stuffed in his pockets as his eyes meet hers. "But I'll take what I can get." He smiled, and Yuu felt her heart skip a beat. Some things never changed, but in some cases, Yuu doesn't quite mind.

---

November 2008.

"I won't start going out if it has not reached the "I want to get married" level ne. ...Going out with a person like me, If there is a girl who is willing to wait for me...... then maybe we can get married (laughs)." ~ WITH October 2008.

"Is that how it goes?" Yuu asks with a smirk as she points at the lines.

Yamapi flushes, pulling the magazine from her hands. "Why are you even reading that?" he asks, setting it down at the table next to the couch.

Yuu shrugs, leaning against Yamapi's shoulder as they watch some movie that Yuu hasn't quite been paying attention to. "Because I find out things about my boyfriend that I would never have known otherwise, apparently."

Yamapi laughs, shaking his head. "All you have to do is ask, Yuu."

"Okay. Do you love me?" Yuu asks mischievously, turning to look at him.

Yamapi faces her, grinning. "Hmm. I wonder," he jokes, looking pensive.

Yuu leans in to press a kiss against the side of his lips. "How about now?"

"A little more," Yamapi comments, his hand warm against her cheek. Yuu kisses a little closer again. "Hmm, a little more each day," he says just as Yuu kisses him full-on the lips.

Yuu smiles against the kiss, making it more passionate. Against her throat, her new pink diamond ring linked through a chain glitters under the light.

Back to Part 1

Pulled Along By Love - Yamapi/Abiru Yuu [PG-13]

Mon, 05 Jan 2009 18:58:41 GMT

Pulled Along By Love. Part 1
tinyangl, 11610 words
Yamashita Tomohisa/Abiru Yuu, Hints of Tanaka Koki/Abiru Yuu, Issa (from Da Pump)/Abiru Yuu, and Yamashita Tomohisa/Kitagawa Keiko, Yamapi has a routine—even if he doesn't quite realize it himself—that Yuu really wishes she hadn't figured out herself. So when he brings her to Hawaii yet again, she doesn't know if she should hope that she's wrong or just accept what's to come.
A/N: Written to the prompt T&T's Venus for fic_games. All information about Abiru Yuu and her relationships is from Wiki or the various rumors all over the place – most from uwasako. As such, I took lots and lots of liberties. Lol Thanks to silver_rose88 for reading this over on multiple takes as it was being written and letting me know her opinion. As well as cynicalism for always listening to me whine away about this. You're both loved dearly. ♥♥♥

October 2008.

"Let's go away."

The voice startles Yuu out of her sleep, fingers gently skirt over her forehead, pushing her hair out of her eyes enough to make out the person in front of her. "Okay," she mumbles, barely able to see Yamapi's face. "In the morning." She's lying on her side with her face half-pressed against the pillow, her voice muffled as she speaks.

"Now," he says, voice laced with finality.

Yuu opens her eyes fully with a sigh, pushing up off the bed to lean up against her arm. "Is that so? Anywhere you want?"

"Anywhere," Yamapi murmurs, leaning in to press a kiss to the side of her lips and tucking her hair behind her ear. "Out of Tokyo. Out of Japan." Yuu frowns. "Hawaii. Let's go to Hawaii," he breathes.

Yuu sighs. "Okay. Hawaii." She throws the blankets off of her, getting off the bed. "How about your Jimusho?" she asks.

"No problem," Yamapi says, getting up as well and grabbing an already packed bag to the side of his cabinet. Yuu looks over at him, an eyebrow raised. "I have a week off for vacation," he adds in.

Yuu grabs an already packed bag as well, next to the drawer she had claimed as her own. "Hmm," she says in response, grabbing some clothes and heading out the door. She manages a glance at the clock on her way out and inwardly groans. It was only 3:24 A.M. She can hear Yamapi following behind her, but she pays him no heed. As she passes by the entrance, Yuu catches sight of the jacket Yamapi had just thrown over the nearest chair, his shoes strewn at the entrance way where he'd left it. She licks her lips and sighs.

Within minutes, Yuu finds herself inside the car and the bags tucked in the trunk – bright lights leaving her behind and Yamapi's stoic face beside her, lost to everything but the road and his own thoughts. She glances back out the window and frowns.

The plane ride to Hawaii goes smoothly – no sign of turbulence, no sign of disturbance, no sign of Yamapi even speaking to her. Yuu hates how familiar this feels.

---

June 2003.

"Should you be standing there?"

Yuu breathed, turning around to catch sight of someone standing close by. She recognized him in an instant, even if she didn't know him personally. Without a word, she turned on her heel, moving away from the Johnny's Jimusho building.

"Hey!" he called out, but her feet moved faster, her face flushing in embarrassment. She shouldn't have come. His hand was on her elbow and he yanked her back, throwing her off balance. The shock on his face at the act quickly changed to concern. "Sorry, I didn't mean to- I just meant-"

"Forget it," she snipped. His hand was still gripping to her arm and Yuu looked down, pointedly. Yamapi let go, a sheepish smile on his face.

"If you wanted to see Koki-" Yamapi started, but Yuu quickly cut him off. "I'm not."

Yamapi blinked. "Oh. I just thought-"

"Forget it," she repeated, just as bitterly. "I shouldn't have come in the first place."

"Why did you?" Yuu gave him a dark look and Yamapi scuffled his sneakers against the pavement. "Look. It's just that the Jimusho has a thing about us and girls. Usually, the guys tell their girlfriends to show up at the back door at least. I thought Koki would've-"

"He doesn't know I'm here," Yuu bit out. "He wouldn't want me here."

Yamapi blinked. Then again. "Wait, what?"

"Forget it."

"You've said that already."

Yuu stared. Yamapi only grinned. "Whatever. I'm leaving." She turned again, heading towards the train.

"Hey!" Yamapi called out; Yuu didn't turn. "I'm Yamashita Tomohisa. We go to the same school." Yuu scoffed inwardly―as though she didn't know something as simple as that. "See you around!" She didn't have to turn around to see that he was probably waving stupidly at her back. She refused to acknowledge her heart skipping a beat.

---

October 2008.

"Here's your room."

Yuu doesn't know when she's ever been so glad to see a bed. Except sleeping at 4 in the afternoon, even if it was in Hawaii time, feels strange when she thinks about it. Sighing, she plops herself on top of the bed, relishing in the feel of soft comforters on her skin and the relaxing mattress behind her back―the plane's chairs doesn't come close in comparison.

Yamapi follows behind her, making sure to tip the bellboy for carrying up their bags before the boy leaves. He doesn't even stop by the bed, but makes a beeline for the balcony, pushing the curtains out of the way and sliding the door open. Yuu sits up from the bed, watching as Yamapi leans against the balcony railing and pulls out a cigarette, lighting it up and inhaling.

She stands up, walking over and wrapping her arms around Yamapi from behind. Yuu buries her face against his back, her nose catching the scent of his cologne and the smoke from the cigarette "'Hisa, something's up, isn't it?"

Yamapi takes another drag from the cigarette, pulling away from Yuu's grasp and shifting sideways to throw an arm over her shoulders. He hands the cigarette over to her, which she takes and sucks at the end. She turns and blows the smoke right at Yamapi's face. He doesn't even flinch.

"Fine," she sighs, rolling her eyes. "Don't talk." She moves to walk back into the hotel room, but his hand at the crook of her elbow stops her in her tracks. She turns and meets his gaze – heavy and stark. The bags under his eyes have gotten darker―or has she just not noticed them darkening under all his usual makeup? She reaches out, fingertips brushing past the bags and sweeping the hair away from his face. Yamapi's other hand, with the cigarette pointed away from her, tucks her hair from her eyes, before he pulls her closer, pressing a kiss against her forehead.

"Go sleep," he murmurs, before pulling away and letting go. He turns back to the balcony, bringing the cigarette back to his lips. Yuu stares at him for a moment before turning back and walking inside.

The last thing she remembers before the room goes dark is Yamapi leaning forward on the railings, arms pressing against rough steel. The cigarette dangles precarious from his fingertips – his focus no longer on it, but the vibrant vision of Hawaii lying before him.

---

June 2003.

"Abiru-chan, back again?" the voice called out from halfway down the street.

Yuu cursed her luck, recognizing the voice immediately. It was maybe two weeks since she'd last visited – she'd even chosen a different day (a Saturday as opposed to Monday) and a different time (1 P.M. As opposed to 5 P.M.). Yet there he was – smiling at her, waving and jogging his way to where she was standing at the corner of the Johnny's Jimusho building, trying to blend herself into the background of the neighborhood. She sighed, wondering if it was too late to dash off like she hadn't heard him.

"Hey!" he greeted when he finally appeared in front of her. "Remember? I'm Yama-"

"I know who you are," Yuu interrupted sharply. "All of Japan knows who you are." The edges of Yamapi's lips twitched upwards at her words, but he seemed to be trying hard not to look too proud. Yuu almost cracked a smile, but she bit down at the bottom of her lip, blowing her hair out of her face a second later. "Look. I'm just gonna-"

"Are you here to see Koki?" Yamapi pressed, cutting her off suddenly. "I know KAT-TUN's meeting today."

Yuu swallowed the rest of her words, pursing her lips together before saying dryly, "I knew you were out of the loop, but this is ridiculous."

"What-"

"We broke up three weeks ago." Yamapi opened his mouth, but quickly closed it. Then it fell agape again, forming an "o" with his lips. His eyes darted from side to side, and Yuu almost felt bad for him for jumping like she had. "Look, it's not-"

"Did you not want to?"

Yuu stopped abruptly. "What?" she asked, her mouth agape, and her heart beat a little faster than it had before.

Yamapi averted his eyes from hers, staring across at some spot to the right side of her – maybe a speck of dirt on the street. He'd stuck his hands into his pockets, standing straight, but there was an air of awkwardness in the position―he couldn't look straight at her, nor could he stand still―rocking back and forth on the tips of his toes. "Did you not want to break up?" Yamapi said, finally meeting her eyes at the end of the question. The light caught his dirty blond hair, and Yuu wasn't quite sure why suddenly―she hoped suddenly―she found him maybe just a little adorable. "Is that why you keep coming back?"

"I-" Yuu stumbled over her thoughts, her words. "I don't- That's not- It's not how." She huffed. "I don't get why I'm talking about this with you of all people," she exhaled, her words laced with frustration.

Yamapi shrugged. "I can be a good listener when I like. Just ask Jin, I listen all the time." Then he paused, adding after a beat. "Although I'm not sure I actually know what he's talking to half the time." He shrugged. "But I do listen!"

The words were said so earnestly that Yuu wasn't sure what to make of it. She cracked a bit of a smile, shaking her head – the edges of her lips tugging too hard for her to resist. She tried to hide it with her hand, but when she met Yamapi's eyes, he was grinning widely back at her.

"Does that mean that you'll let me listen?"

"No," Yuu said with ease; the smile on Yamapi's face quickly disappeared. "Although you should get points on effort." Pulling her phone out of her bag, Yuu pressed it into Yamapi's hand. "Give me your phone number."

Yamapi blinked in surprise. "Eh?" he said dumbfounded.

"You offered." She reached over, moving to take her cell phone back. "But I suppose-"

He pulled back, holding the phone over his head. He wasn't that much taller than her, but still Yuu couldn't reach it. "Ugh," she mumbled, stepping back and crossing her arms. "Fine. Whatever."

Yamapi smirked at her, punching in his phone number and saving it. Yuu could see the knots of concentration in his forehead, and resisted from rolling her eyes. He then took out his own phone, punching in what she assumed was her number into his phone. "There you go," he said after a few minutes, handing the phone back to her. As soon as she got it, she scrolled down her phone book, but didn't catch sight of Yamapi's name.

"Where did-"

"You'll just have to wait and see." He grinned at her before lifting his arm to get a good look at his watch. "Shit. I gotta get going."

Yuu nodded, tucking her phone inside her purse. "See you later then?" she asked.

"Yeah. Stop stalking the Jimusho!" he called out, waving at her and dashing into the building. Yuu tried hard not to laugh, but as soon as his back disappeared through the doors, she sighed and gave in, laughing. Her phone started to ring from inside her bag, and she scrambled to pick it up. As soon as she saw the name, Yuu couldn't stop her laughter.

The Great Listener.

Yuu let the call go straight to voicemail.

---

October 2008.

"…Haruka ikoku no moonlight."

"….The moonlight of a distant foreign country."

Yuu jerks out of her sleep, the ending chimes of her ring tone fading into the dark. The cell phone brightens the room for just a moment before it goes dim again, plunging the room back to pitch black. Her body joints ache from everything, her head is hazy, and her eyes heavy with the hope for more sleep. She almost feels like slipping back into sleep, but her cell phone goes off again, her alarm for 9:30 P.M. in Japan time going off. Yuu reaches over and shuts it off, catching sight of the neon lights of 2:39 A.M. across the room. Sighing, she stretches on the bed, underneath a blanket she doesn't remember ever tucking under. When her arm hits empty air beside her, she frowns. Her eyes get used to the darkness in moments, and she can tell that nobody is in the room other than her – even the heavy, white curtains are pulled closed and the glass door shut behind it.

She sits up, sighing again and ruffling her already messy long hair with her free hand before leaning over to flick on the light beside her bed. The small lamp doesn't illuminate much, but it's enough for Yuu to move around the spacious room without trouble. She slips into the sandals she'd left beside the bed and walks over to the drawers where she suspects she'll find her clothes, already unpacked.

They are―neatly folded and placed one on top of the other. Yuu isn't quite sure what this says about Yamapi, but she appreciates it, pulling one of her maroon summer dresses and a black sweater to throw over it before heading straight to the bathroom.

Yuu makes her way down a path that doesn't exist, but is as familiar to her as everything else in this place. She doesn't even have to make sure that she's going the right way; her feet just automatically know. Her sandals dangle from her hands, her grip barely existent, and the dry sand underneath her feet is cold and refreshing, completely different from the scorching heat she's much too used to and half expects. Overhead, the sky is clear with the twinkling of tiny lights greeting her and the half moon glowing above the horizon, illuminating her way.

A distance away, Yuu can just make out a figure. She squints, but it only makes Yamapi look like he's about to be swallowed by darkness, so much that Yuu half-wonders if she should run and grab him before he disappears completely. She doesn't though. She walks forward slowly, the haze around him clearing as she takes each step.

He's watching the ocean come alive – waves crashing echo in her ears for days to come after they've left―a permanent sound in Hawaii that she manages to tuck to the back of her head when she's there. He lifts his hand, bringing a cigarette up to his lips and taking a puff. A cloud of pale gray practically glows in the night's sky.

"Fancy meeting you here," Yuu calls out when she's close enough for him to hear. She pushes her hair out of her face, her head tilting to the side as the wind dances through strands of hair. Yamapi glances over and the dull light from the cigarette is near enough to his face that Yuu can just make out the hint of a smile.

"A surprise indeed," Yamapi murmurs, pressing out the butt of his cigarette on an ash tray he'd set next to his feet. Yuu manages to catch sight of at least 3 finished cigarettes – she doesn't say a word. "What are you doing up?"

"Alarm went off," Yuu sighs, moving to stand beside him, staring out into the ocean. "If we were back in Tokyo, we'd probably be having dinner right now."

"Mmm."

"Have you even gotten any sleep?"

"Later," Yamapi says, his face set―Yuu finds she has too many moments where she just can't read him.

"As long as you get some," Yuu comments. The rustling beside her catches her attention, and when she looks over, Yamapi's sitting down, knees bent and relaxed and butt firmly on the ground. Without a word, Yuu sits down beside him, her legs tucked in and perpendicular to the ground―she ignores the feel of the sand particles digging into her skin; the fact that with the skirt sand was going to find its way inside. She instead focuses on the heavy weight of Yamapi's arm over her shoulders – warm and comfortable. Familiar. He pulls her towards him, his hand pressed against the side of her arm. She focuses on his strong shoulder, head leaning against it – her eyes drooping again without her realizing. She focuses on the sharp corner of his jaw – pointed out towards the ocean, towards something that Yamapi always looked at, something that doesn't physically exist.

Before she knows it, sleep takes her over, and when she opens her eyes again, Yamapi's warm breath hitting her skin. The sun is peeking out from below the horizon. Yamapi's arm is still wrapped around her shoulder, and even though it's now cold―as though he'd never moved it, not once for as long as they'd been sitting there―he's still warm against her skin.

"It's morning," Yamapi says, turning to face her. The bags under his eyes have only gotten darker and Yuu wonders if he really hadn't gotten any sleep.

"Can tell."

Yamapi chuckles, thumb rubbing in a circular pattern against her skin, warming her up. "Wanna get breakfast?"

Yuu hums lightly, suddenly aware of just how painful the sand is against her body and tries to ignore it, in favor of relishing the smile on Yamapi's face. "Later. The sun's rising." Yamapi raises an eyebrow at her. "It'd be rude to just leave."

He laughs, shaking his head. "That's the strangest thing I've ever heard you say."

"I think I got that from you actually," she retorts dryly.

Yamapi doesn't say anything, just laughs. Yuu feels her heart skip a beat, and then wonders why even to this day, he still has the same effect on her. His grip gets a touch tighter and Yuu sinks back into the warmth that is Yamapi's embrace.

---

July 2003.

"Karaoke's fine, isn't it?"

Yuu sighed as she hung up the phone. It was possibly the fifth time Yamapi had suggested karaoke, and she supposed the other four times she'd declined – by first saying no, and then hanging up three times―no wait, now it was four―didn't get her point across enough. It was getting ridiculous.

Her phone went off again and she glared down at the sound of some song from Tackey & Tsubasa that Yamapi had set as his ring tone as a joke. "It's so you can always tell when I'm calling!" he'd said, so ridiculously cheerful that even Yuu was taken in.

She picked up anyway. "Look, Yamashita-"

"How about just some food then?"

Yuu paused. "Should you be going anywhere with a girl?" She wondered if he could hear the lingering "like me" at the end of her question like she did.

"It'll be fine. We're only friends, right?"

"Right," she echoed.

"Great! I know the best place." She could hear his infectious smile over the phone―it was getting ridiculous she was starting to know so much about him.

Biting back her own smile, Yuu responded quickly. "Yeah, sure. I'll meet you at the Jimusho building?"

"Back door!" Yamapi immediately blurted out. "Don't forget."

Yuu rolled her eyes. "Hard to forget something that I didn't know to begin with."

"Aren't you a smart one?" Yamapi laughed – the sarcasm disappearing under his amusement. "I'll see you later."

"Mm," Yuu agreed. "Later." The sound of the dial tone rang in her ears before she finally shut it. Half of her wondered if this was the best decision, but she mentally flashed to the sight of Yamapi smiling back at her, and she thought that it might be a little worth it to give it a try.

Hell if she ever told him that though.

---

October 2008.

"Where is he now?"

"Hi, Akanishi-kun. Nice talking to you too," Yuu says dryly into her cell. Jin always manages to call on the first day―Yuu pretty much knows the unwritten schedule like the back of her hand.

"Hawaii?"

"Hawaii."

"So by the end of this week..." his voice trails off, the rest of sentence hanging in the air. But they both know exactly how it ends.

"Probably."

Pause. "Is he okay?" Yuu half wishes that he'd actually asked if she was okay, but Yamapi always did take precedence―Jin was his best friend after all. She side-steps the thought.

"If you mean, "Is he sleeping?" then the answer is no." Yuu sighs. "I think he hasn't slept for two days."

There's a pause on the other line and Yuu can hear Jin thinking – thinking about what to do for Pi (usually there isn't anything), thinking about what he should do next, thinking about what he'll do when Yamapi gets back. It's always the same. Sometimes, he even thinks about Yuu and what this means for her. "Look-" Jin starts, but the shower in the other room shuts off and Yuu shushes him. "Yuu," he tries to start again, but Yuu shushes him again. "You have to stop this."

"Akanishi, I’ll talk to you later," Yuu says, not concentrating. The door inches open, and Yuu can see a hint of light and steam coming into the room.

"Talk to you later." Jin hangs up before Yuu can even think to say good-bye, but she doesn’t care. She shuts her phone, slipping it into her pocket before meeting a dripping Yamapi at the doorway of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his waist and another one in his hand.

"Was that Jin?" Yamapi asks, his voice slightly hollow―Yuu isn’t sure if she’s imagining it or not―as he rubs the towel against his hair, trying to dry it before tossing it aside against the drawers.

Yuu purses her lips before nodding. "Yeah," she says. "You know how he is."

"Did you tell him where we were?"

"Of course," Yuu says, leaning against the wall and watching as Yamapi’s lips and the edges of his eyes quirk downward.

"Great, he can spread the news."

Yuu sighs as Yamapi puts on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt and plops himself on the couch, turning on the television. "That’s all?"

"There’s more to add?" Yamapi asks flippantly, his eyes now caught on some American show with people bungee jumping off a bridge.

Yuu pauses, trying to gauge Yamapi’s reaction, but she can’t get much when he’s not even looking at her. "I guess not," she comments a beat later. He looks up at her, smiling, before patting the spot next to him. Yuu rests on the couch next to him, tucked underneath his arm, comfortable and warm – as always. She doesn’t realize that she’s already asleep.

---

July 2003.

"What do you think you’re doing, Yamashita-kun?"

Yuu held her breath before she rounded the corner. It wasn’t as though she’d even seen him, but she recognized his voice without question.

"What are you talking about, Koki?" Yamapi asked, the same innocence in his voice that Yuu was used to.

"I’ve been hearing that you’ve been spending time with Yuu-chan. You do know that she’s my girlfriend, right?"

Yuu could hear the pause in Yamapi’s voice, the eye blink before he said, "I thought you two had broken up. That’s what Abiru-chan told me anyway."

Another pause, and Koki’s reluctant response of "Technically, we’ve broken up." followed, but a second later, Koki added. "But I don’t want to be. She-"

"She didn’t either." Yuu almost fumed at Yamapi just saying flat out something that she never wanted Koki to know, but he never said anything past that.

"What are you talking about?" Koki snapped.

"Absolutely nothing," Yamapi replied. "It's. ...Nothing."

"You-" Koki started, a growl in his voice before going quiet. "What does this have anything to do with you anyway?"

"Because I actually noticed her." Yamapi was quiet, no malice in his voice. Just a soft comment said plainly.

Yuu didn’t hear Koki respond back; all she heard was the sound of Koki’s footsteps against gravel as he walked back into the building, a door slamming behind him. Yamapi’s sigh of relief caught Yuu’s attention, and she heard him slump against a nearby wall, throwing down his bag. Her phone vibrated in her breast pocket a second later and Yuu almost jumped out of her skin when it started. Unintentionally, she let the phone go to voice mail and heard Yamapi’s soft, "Hey, Abiru-chan. Just wanted to see where you are. Hope you didn’t get lost. The back entrance is a little tough to find." He paused. "I hope to see you soon." Another pause before he abruptly added. "And this is Yamapi-Yamashita. Which you probably already knew, but just in case. Yeah. …See you later. Again." After he shut the phone, Yamapi let out a small curse, and Yuu realized just how easily he could make her smile.

She waited a few minutes just listening to the sound of her own breathing before steeling herself and rounding the corner. Yamapi’s eyes sparkled once he saw her, and a genuine smile graced his lips. Yuu felt herself give one in return, without even intending to.

"Hey. Didn’t get lost, huh?"

"Hard not to."

Yamapi’s grin got a touch brighter.

---

October 2008.

"Where in the world is Abiru Yuu?"

Is the question that startles Yuu out of bed, wide-eyed and blinking. She doesn’t remember at all sleeping in bed―hell, she doesn’t remember going to sleep at all. But she’s sprawled out on the bed, covers on top of her and no sign of any other life in the room. She sits up, stretching and taking in the sight of light spilling into the hotel room through the inch of space between the curtains. Yuu figures it must already be morning; that explains the missing Yamapi. Taking a few more minutes to stretch, Yuu tries hard to remember exactly what Yamapi would be doing at this time and it comes to her a second after she hears the crashing of waves outside her window.

With a small smile, Yuu throws the covers off and makes her way to the bathroom. She figures Yamapi can wait a few minutes for her (as though he’s really waiting, but Yuu likes to be a little positive sometimes) as she takes a well-needed shower and puts on a new outfit for the day.

It’s already 11 in the morning when Yuu finally walks outside onto the beach, foregoing the use of sandals―for now anyway―and staring out into the ocean, trying to see if she can spot, by some amazing feat, the sight of Yamapi out there with his surfboard. She doesn’t at first. But not many people are crazy enough to tackle the waves at this time, so it takes her almost no time.

When she does finally spot Yamapi, his body dances with the waves―weaving in and out like he’s water too. Yuu doesn’t realize that she’s even holding her breath as she watches Yamapi zoom through the wave, eyes narrowed – focused, always so focused. His arms are out in front and behind of him, trying to keep the precarious sense of balance that he desires. When he finally reaches the end and the surfboard skirts across the water, Yuu lets out that breath that echoes the one that Yamapi lets out feet away.

He falls into the water, pushing back his soaked bangs away from his face and turns at the perfect time to catch Yuu standing at the beach, arms behind her back and a smile on her face. She waves at him and he waves back, enthusiastic and then starts pointing behind him, asking without words if she’d seen what he’d just done.

Yuu laughs, nodding vigorously before her phone goes off―muted strains of Yokubou no Rain which she thinks is utterly inappropriate and she really needs to stop letting Yamapi choose her ring tones―and she lifts up her bag, pointing at it in hopes that Yamapi can see what she’s gesturing at.

He makes a visible head bob before starting towards the shore on the surfboard.

Yuu takes the phone call, her eyes never leaving the approaching Yamapi. "Hey, Toma-kun," she says out of habit.

"Abiru-chan!" Toma says cheerfully. "Any chance I can talk to Pi? Hasn’t been picking up his phone as expected. And since you’re attached to your phone and to Pi, well, you see where I’m going."

Yuu snorts, rolling her eyes. "I’d say that’s a lie, but there’s no point. Besides, Pi’s swimming in right now and there’s no way I’m letting his watery self go near my phone."

She can hear Toma’s frown through the phone. "Is that the only reason why?"

"Now you sound like Akanishi-kun," Yuu retorts dryly.

"You mean, being suspicious? Well-"

"Don't finish that sentence. I'm taking care of him, okay?" By this point, Yamapi’s on shore, surfboard tucked under his arm and skin glistening from sun reflecting off the water droplets clinging to him. Yuu openly stares; although she’s at least mindful to keep her mouth shut as she does so. Yamapi’s eyes seem to be shining, but Yuu half wonders if that’s really the water than his actual emotions. Toma’s babbling in her ear, Yuu ignoring him completely, but at this point, she's lost all sense of coherence as Yamapi walks up to her with a grin on his face, leaning over to peck her on the cheek before treading further down the beach towards his things and more importantly, his towel.

"Abiru-chan? Abiru-chan?!" is what Yuu hears when she finally refocuses, sputtering as she apologizes for not paying attention―she says it pointedly, not bothering to make excuses.

Toma snorts. "I guess I’ll take that to mean that you have other things to focus on then?"

"If I say, "Hell yes?""

"I’ll talk to Pi later this week then."

"Thank you," Yuu breathes as she watches Yamapi drag his towel down his chest, trying to dry off after shedding at least the top half of his wet suit. She thinks her mouth has gone dry.

"No problem. Go back to ogling your boyfriend." Toma laughs.

There’s a pause before Yuu can hang up. "By the way, are you in Hawaii?" he asks.

"Bye, Toma-kun," Yuu says abruptly, sidestepping his question. Yamapi walks towards her, his bag slung over his shoulder and the other arm holding his surfboard. "Ready for lunch?" Yuu asks him cheerfully.

Before he answers, Yamapi leans in, pecking her on the lips. "Had a good sleep?" Yamapi asks as they start trudging towards their hotel room.

"Good enough. And you?"

Yamapi makes a non-descriptive noise that Yuu takes to mean that he didn’t sleep at all and just doesn’t want to tell her (as always). "Lunch sounds good though. Been out here since early morning."

Yuu laughs, shaking her head. "At least I finally pried you out of the water."

"Only if you make it worth my time," Yamapi jokes before winking at her. He grins then looks away, walking off.

Yuu can feel the pang in her heart when she realizes with a start that she can't remember his genuine smile—not the ones that he just passes off as smiles. She spends a fleeting second wondering what could've brought this about―maybe it was the water; water was supposed to be re-invigorating after all. Yuu tucks away the sight of Yamapi’s smile before she throws herself back into their conversation.

---

October 2003.

"You're kidding me, right?"

Yuu closed her eyes, hoping she could somehow will herself to disappear at that moment―to get away from the disappointed look on Yamapi's face as he stared her down. But she didn't magically teleport somewhere when she opened her eyes again. All she saw was the wounded look in Yamapi's eyes.

"Look," she started, but didn't know where to continue from there. The words tumble in her head. School started. Koki was being his usual self. Yamapi was Yamapi―Yuu didn't mention that last one at all. She still liked Koki. They didn't really end, not really. Just a break. "Just a break," she says. "It had been just a break. Not a break-up."

"What's the difference? Yamapi asked sourly. Yuu resisted from frowning―he'd become so bitter lately, but she knew better than to broach that subject.

"There just is," Yuu insisted, even if she didn't know the answer to his question herself.

"So what does this mean?"

Yuu blinked, startled. "I-What?"

"Did he tell you to stay away from me or something? Is that why you're telling me?" Yamapi asked sharply, arms crossed.

"Wha-No! Koki has no say over things like that." Yuu frowned. "You've been acting weird lately. I know you've been through-"

"No," Yamapi interrupted. "I don't. That doesn't have anything to do with this."

"But it does. You don't seem to realize-"

"Abiru-chan, really. I don't want to talk about it," Yamapi said firmly.

Yuu faltered in her own insistence, and sighed. "Okay, but eventually-"

"Anyway, I'm sorry for snapping," Yamapi interrupted.

"It's okay," Yuu said, smiling. "I really meant it when I said Koki has no say over things like this." She gestured at the two of them. "I still want to be friends."

Yamapi laughed, although there was a tinge of bitterness in it―Yuu wasn't sure if that was just in general but because of her statement. "Congratulations, I'm glad you're happy."

Yuu grinned. "Un."

It ended up being a moot point really―Koki and Yuu coming back together, that is. It was fun, for the five months that they were together, but Koki was graduating and they decided that it'd probably be better for both of them if they broke up. Yuu realized as an afterthought that Yamapi was graduating too.

They hadn't spoken for four months―Yuu wondered if it was entirely her fault.

---

October 2008.

"If you could follow me please."

The restaurant’s server gestures them to follow their waiter to a table towards the side, right next to the windows and overlooking the ocean’s night sky―a sight Yuu and Yamapi were familiar with, but never minded seeing over and over again.

"Thank you," Yuu says as Yamapi pushes her chair in after she settles in. The waiter hands them their menus and Yuu looks up at Yamapi, taking in the sight of him in his suit and tie, and has to stop herself from suggesting that they forgo dinner and just head straight to dessert―as lame as that pick-up line is. Yuu shakes her head, staring down at her menu. It takes her a few minutes before she starts with the feeling of someone staring at her, and when she looks back up, Yamapi makes no move towards looking away.

"Yes?" She asks, leaning her elbows against the table.

"Like you didn't realize how gorgeous you look tonight," Yamapi retorts, glancing down at his menu.

Yuu feels her body go hot―flushing as she sits back and tries to remember to breathe (which is already hard enough in the tight red dress she has on). For a second, she thinks she must look like a cherry or something. "You're such a flatterer," she murmurs, her gaze still on Yamapi.

By the sudden smile on his face, Yuu figures Yamapi heard her perfectly. Yuu rolls her eyes, shaking her head and looking back down at her menu.

"You know," Yamapi starts as he puts down his menu. "I think we're overdressed."

Yuu snorts. "As in we're dressed period?"

"I like how you think." Yamapi smirks and Yuu has to resist from rolling her eyes.

"Food is good too. Remember that we haven't ea-" She stops short as her phone goes off, the beginning chimes of Hoshi wo Mezashite play through the restaurant. Yuu lunges for her phone, rushing to answer it, but Yamapi pulls it out of her hand―first checking to see who it is.

"Koyama!" he says cheerfully, but the dark look in his eyes is more honest than everything else. "What's up?"

Yuu can just imagine Koyama's possible discomfort―he probably hadn't expected Yamapi to answer her phone especially when his purpose was to update them―her really—on everything that'd been going on at the Jimusho.

"Oh, so we start work as soon as I get back?" Yamapi nods, listening to Koyama babble on the other line. He makes a talking hand gesture to her and Yuu laughs, a little strained, but she laughs.

"Thanks for telling me, Koyama. I'll call when I get back in Japan." Yamapi shuts her phone, hanging up and passing it back to Yuu. "He just wanted to tell me our work schedule."

"Ah," Yuu murmurs―as though she hadn't known. "Well, that's nice of him."

"Mmhmm. Isn't it?" Yamapi's eyes meet hers and Yuu hates that they lost the spark that had just been there five seconds ago.

"Well, food awaits, doesn't it?" Yuu says, looking down at her menu and shutting her phone off completely. Nobody usually calls anyway, but Yuu doesn't think she can handle it anymore―the switches in moods. Part of her is happy that they're in Hawaii.

---

November 2005.

"Are you okay?" Issa asked her when her grip got a touch tighter than usual.

Yuu gave him a shaky smile before turning to look him in the eye. "Yeah, I'm good," she murmured. When they walked down half the block, Yuu mustered the courage to look behind them and her fears were answered. Walking in the other direction, Yamapi had his arm around some girl―a girl that Yuu could've sworn looked vaguely familiar.

He started to turn his head and Yuu abruptly looked down her path again, hoping that he hadn't noticed her. It was a busy street―people miss other people easily.

She didn't miss him though. "Are you sure?" Issa asked again.

"Yeah, really. Let's get something to eat, okay?" she grinned up at him―Yamapi was a long time ago, after all. They didn't have ties anymore.

A month later during a Christmas party though, Yuu's proven wrong immediately. "Abiru-chan," Yamapi breathed when they came face to face.

Yuu froze, drink clutched in her hands as she fights not to take a sip just to "help her along." "Yamashita-kun," she says softly in greeting. "Merry Christmas. Celebrating it here?"

"Shouldn't I ask the same of you? Don't you have a boyfriend?" Yamapi raised an eyebrow.

"Don't you have a girlfriend?" Yuu countered―a week after the not-really-a meeting, rumors of a relationship between Yamapi and Kitagawa Keiko had sprung up. She realized then why the girl had seemed familiar.

"No, I don't," Yamapi answered coolly before taking a sip of his drink.

"I don't either," Yuu responded. Truthfully as she and Issa had broken up only just last week.

"Well, isn't this a sight?" Yamapi smirked. "Christmas day and neither of us have dates on such a romantic holiday."

Yuu laughed sardonically, clinking her glass against Yamapi's before finally drinking whatever she'd ordered at the bar. "We're an amazing pair."

"Merry Christmas indeed."

New Year's day, they found themselves less lonely in each other's arms.

---

October 2008.

"Renai no keishiki sekirara na ishiki..."

"Love's form, naked senses..."

It's usually on the third day – no, always on the third day. Yuu closes her eyes, her body arching towards Yamapi's touch as he hovers over her – eyes as intense as she's ever seen them. Her breath catches when his fingers skirt around the lining of her jeans, hands deftly unbuttoning them and pulling down the zipper. A thumb presses against her stomach, right below the belly button and trails gently downwards – all Yuu can feel is the sensation of his nail tickling at her skin, his touch so light that she half thinks that she's imagining it.

She moves her hand downwards, finding his and trying to guide him—as though he doesn't know—but he switches grips, the hand that was teasing her—that was coming close, but not really—disappears. Yamapi grips her hands with his freed hand, pinning them over her head and Yuu has to hold back a gasp when he finds her with his other hand.

It's beyond understanding in Yuu's opinion – the way he makes her lose it every time, the way his touches seem to set her blood boiling and her skin ablaze, the way that she finds herself always wanting more – always wanting something that she could never fully get.

When she opens her eyes, panting and struggling to find a sense of balance, his eyes are the first things she sees – dark and sharp. Focused. His fingers mark dots along her inner thigh – around her wrists and around her heart.

Yuu cries out when he moves, and Yamapi's body is closer – much closer than before. Sweat drips down both their bodies and the heat seems to fill the room. Yamapi's head leans against hers as he pants, pausing – trying to find the right pace. Yuu's past caring though – she jerks forward, and the sudden movement reminds her that Yamapi still has her hands above her head. She squirms, trying to get free from the restriction, but his grip only gets tighter and he jerks forward again.

His nails dig into her wrists, but her own are making permanent marks inside the palm of her hands—marks that form over old marks—perfect crescent arcs. The room isn't dark – not completely, even with the curtains drawn and the lights off. A hint of the sun outside makes its way in through the edges of the curtains, just enough light that Yuu can practically see the sweat glistening off of Yamapi's shoulder – the only view she has right now.

Yamapi shifts and Yuu has a perfect view of his face – white teeth biting down on his bottom lip, half-lidded eyes that see her and only her. Her voice has completely disappeared and all Yuu can hear is the sound of their own breathing, mingling in the air to become perfect harmony.

It only takes a second. Yuu feels Yamapi's grip on her hands loosening – she knows this means that he's losing control. She manages to wiggle out of his grip, hands flying to the sides of his face, and she tilts her own head towards his. Their lips meet and suddenly, it's like Yamapi's lost all sense of patience.

The urgency throws Yuu for a loop – her head spins and her heart pounds. Faster and faster. She throws her head back, the need for air too much and her hands grip to his shoulders and perfect crescents line down his back.

At the end of the day, it's perfect to them – the coming together of two bodies moving at the same time, speed, hearts with the same message. Yuu can barely hear the sound of her own voice mixing with Yamapi's, but all she knows is that the low groan coming from Yamapi's mouth sends her over the edge every time – eyes shutting as she does what she does best. React.

When Yuu finally opens her eyes again, she only hears Yamapi's gentle breathing beside her. A second later, she can hear the sound of his heartbeat, her head resting against his chest.

Yuu tilts her head upwards to catch sight of Yamapi sleeping, a peaceful expression on his face and she can't help, but smile. It was always the third day that he finally slept, and Yuu always let him.

She gets up, tucking one of the blankets out of Yamapi's hold and wrapping it around herself as she heads to the bathroom, ready for a nice bath. Before she fully enters, she looks back and Yamapi turns over in the bed, sleeping on his side, the blankets tangled in his legs.

Yuu thinks she could forever be happy with just that sight, but she crosses the thought of her head and promptly drops the blanket at the doorway.

Her cell phone lies on the night table beside the bed. Nobody dares to call on the third day.

---

December 2006.

"Merry Christmas," Yamapi murmured, leaning in to press kiss against the side of Yuu's throat.

"Much better Christmas than last year," Yuu laughs, molding her body against his, lifting up from the bed she was lying on.

"Considering how we're not single this year, hard not to be." Yamapi littered kisses along the side of her throat, stopping only due to the trouble of fabric.

Yuu giggled, fingers playing with the hair at Yamapi's nape. "Isn't this kinda wrong?" she asked, despite turning her head to give Yamapi better access to the other side of her throat which he proceeds to litter with more kisses.

"Wrong?"

"Yeah, wrong. Forgotten that word, 'Hisa?" Yuu joked just as Yamapi pushed the sleeve of her shirt out of the way.

"More like I never had it in my dictionary to begin with." His lips descended, moving along the line of her bra―downwards, downwards―trying to push her shirt out of the way without ripping it.

The doorknob jiggled behind them and Yuu tried to fight her burst of giggles as well as light moans. The former didn't win so much as she giggled when Yamapi slipped his hand under her shirt at the back, his hot touch burning his mark on her skin.

"Is anyone in there?" The person at the other side of the door yelled out.

"A little busy!" Yamapi called out.

Pause. "Pi, you better not be screwing Abiru-chan on my bed!" Ryo yelled. Yuu burst into giggles again and Yamapi rolled his eyes.

"Don't worry! I'm not," Yamapi retorted. "At least not yet."

Yuu smirked, leaning up to give him a kiss.

"If you're going to screw on my bed, at least have the decency to let me watch!"

"Don't you have a party to get back to?" Yamapi hissed in between kisses, his other hand busy with trying to get her jeans unbuttoned and off her.

"Not when there's one happening in my bedroom, obviously."

Yuu moaned loudly at that point―half because of Yamapi's hand, the other half because she just wanted to torture Ryo even more.

Ryo paused. "Fuck it. Just get me new sheets."

"Only if you want us to christen those too," Yamapi retorted.

Another pause. "Just give me the money, you fuckers."

Yamapi grinned down at Yuu before kissing her lightly. "Bet you I could make it so we wouldn't even have to do that."

Yuu gripped his forearm. "Before that, I think you have something else to attend to." Yamapi's eyes glittered before her.

---

October 2008.

"Tamerau nara wasuretai."

"If you're going to hesitate, I want to forget."

Yuu dreads the fourth day even more than the fifth day―even if the fifth's the day when everything technically comes to a head. No, it's the fourth day that she always antagonizes over. Yamapi seems to make it a point to avoid her on this day―Yuu chalks it up to him taking the day to "think" things over, a concept that Yuu thinks is ridiculous even though she's not even sure if that's what he really does.

She throws their curtains open, blanket wrapped around her and tied at the side to keep it sturdy. The brightness outside blinds her for a second before her eyes finally adjust. Taking a moment, Yuu just stares out the windows before starting to get ready. She had some sympathy shopping to get ready for after all.

Halfway through the day, Yuu's a few bags heavier, her bank account's a few thousands dollars lighter and her heart's a few notches happier than it was earlier. She stops at some cafe nearby and rewards herself with a really good strawberry smoothie with about ten bags littered around her seat.

Her phone rings―Konayuki plays throughout the busy cafe, but nobody other than her can hear it over the chatter. Yuu picks the phone up grinning. "Hey, Erika," she says, leaning against her propped elbow.

"Hey~" Erika greets; Yuu can hear the whipping wind on the other end―she figures Erika must be walking somewhere.

"What are you doing calling so early?"

"Please. This coming from the same girl who complains when I'm not up early enough?"

"Well, I never said I was complaining," Yuu laughs, taking a sip of her smoothie. "But really, what's up?"

"You up for having a shopping spree? I'm in Japan and was totally hoping for some girl time."

Yuu freezes, suddenly wishing that she really was in Japan. "I-" she starts, trying to figure out how to word it.

"Oh, come on," Erika whines on the other end. "Let me pry you away from that boyfriend of yours. He can handle you missing for a day."

"It's not that," Yuu starts. "It's just that I'm... I'm not exactly in Japan right now."

"What? Then where―" Erika starts and Yuu winces when she hears Erika's, "Oh, fuck."

"Erika, it's nothing-"

"You're in fucking Hawaii, aren't you?" Erika hisses.

"It's not a big deal," Yuu sighs.

"I was the one who helped you figure out just what that idiot does whenever you guys go to Hawaii and the one that had to pick you up from the airport the every time it happens. This is ridiculous, Yuu."

Yuu shrugs before realizing that Erika can't exactly see her over the phone. "Look," she starts, but stops short. "It's fine," Yuu says instead.

"I don't get why you keep going back to him when it's this stupid struggle between the two of you. Off, then on, then off, then on. You always act like everything's normal between you. And what's so fucking great about Yamashita anyway? He doesn't seem that wonderful to me."

"Erika," Yuu sighs―it's not the first time she's heard this from Erika.

"Maybe this time you'll learn that he's not good for you, Yuu. When he breaks your heart again."

"Maybe this time'll be different," Yuu says, but she doesn't really know if she should be saying something she doesn't really believe in either.

"You're being ridiculous."

"So you've said already." Yuu plays with the straw to her smoothie―then stops when she realizes that she'd polished off her drink without knowing.

Erika sighs on the other line. "Fine. Just. Call me when you get back. I'll pick you up from the airport." She pauses. "I'm sure you'll need a ride."

"Erika," Yuu starts, but Erika cuts her off. "I'll hope for the best, but... I'm not sure he'll pull through."

Yuu frowns, but she withholds from commenting further. "I'll talk to you later, Erika."

"See ya. I'll award you with that shopping trip when you get back."

Yuu shuts her phone and looks around her; the bags suddenly make her feel more depressed than happy. She frowns, putting her phone away and throwing away her drink before she grabs all her bags and heads to the hotel. She thinks she's had enough for the day―it was already 5 anyway.

---

November 2007.

"You're joking me," Yuu hissed.

Yamapi stood in front of her, half-frowning. "Not at all," he told her.

"You're breaking up with me?"

"Yes." It was a quick answer―suddenly, Yuu felt offended for not even warranting more of an explanation, more of something.

"That's all?" she asked incredulously. "I'm with you through everything and all I get</i> is a 'Yes'?"

Yamapi licked his lips, scuffling his feet against the rug of their hotel room. "Look, it's not..." he started, but Yuu chucked a pillow at his head.

"You're a fucking asshole!" she continued to chuck whatever she could find at him―considering how close she was to the bed, it ended up being more pillows and sheets and some clothes. "Just because you're starting to get more jobs and more popular and, and..." Yuu found herself trying hard to breathe and just as she collapsed to the floor in sheer exhaustion, Yamapi's arms engulfed her.

"I'm sorry," he whispered against her skin. "I couldn't hold out anymore."

Yuu pulled back, incredulous. "What? Is there someone else―?"

Yamapi cut her off quickly. "No, the Jimusho..." His words trailed off but Yuu immediately hardened. Just the one word was enough for her―she'd been with Yamapi for almost two years by this point and the Jimusho didn't have a single good word to say about her. They'd been rather insistent that Yamapi and Yuu split up (and they had at least once or twice throughout their time together).

"You're kidding me," Yuu growled, pushing Yamapi away. "So now you're giving in? What the hell am I all of a sudden?"

"Yuu," Yamapi started.

"Abiru. You've lost the right to call me that after you let your work dictate everything you do. Even what girl you screw apparently." She stood up, heading towards the drawers and shoving everything she owned into her suitcase.

"Yuu," Yamapi said anyway, insistent. He walked over to her, hugging her from behind and leaning his head against her shoulder. Yuu froze, her hand wrapped around some shirt. "I just can't have you go through this again."

"Shouldn't I have a say in that?" Yuu snapped, trying hard to bat back her own tears―she wasn't that type of girl. She refused to be.

Yamapi sighed, just hugging her tighter.

"If you're splitting up with me, then you're not making things easier for me," Yuu forced out. Yamapi still held on, at least for a handful of long minutes before pulling back.

"I don't-"

"Save it," Yuu interrupted, shutting her eyes. She didn't look back as she heard Yamapi shuffle out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Yuu didn't collapse, she didn't burst into tears. She just continued to cram clothes into her suitcase, grabbing her ticket from the side desk and stepping out of their hotel room.

She refused to think on how she'd come all the way to Hawaii on Yamapi's request after he'd arrived for work with NewS. Once she arrived at the airport, she pleaded to get on an earlier flight which she was granted, and upon landing in Japan, called Erika to pick her up.

When she got into Erika's apartment, refusing to be alone for the night, Yuu pulled out her sleepwear from her suitcase, coming across a buttoned-down shirt that was most definitely not one of her own. Erika watched as for the first time that night, Yuu cried for everything.

Part 2

Four Johnny's Boys Meisa Turns Down and the One She Doesn't - Kame/Meisa [PG]

Fri, 02 Jan 2009 04:13:28 GMT

Four Johnny's Boys Meisa Turns Down and the One She Doesn't
tinyangl, 3004 words.
Hints of Meisa/Yamapi, Meisa/Koki, Meisa/Nino, Meisa/Jin. Oh, and hints of Nino/Masami and Nakamaru/Maki. Kame/Meisa. The title says it all--Meisa works with a lot more Johnny's boys than one knows.
A/N: Simultaneously blaming and dedicating this to cynicalism and swtjemz. And since it was largely dedicated to cynicalism, go figure that the longest part of this fic is the Kame/Meisa part. The start of the year and already I hit 3000k. This bodes so well. Wow, this is a lot of het in one fic--and a lot of OOC. Sorry. Enjoy~

i.

Meisa has never trusted those Johnny's boys even if Koichi-san was nicer than she had thought. ("He's too old for you," Maki said, wrinkling her nose. "That doesn't mean a thing," Meisa insists.) So when she finds out that she has to work with not only one Johnny's boy in her next job, but two, she's not really happy about it.

"But it's with Yamashita-kun!" Maki insists. "You're in good hands."

"As long as said hands aren't touching me," Meisa snaps, before adding, "And you for that matter."

Maki only rolls her eyes. "Either ways. You have nothing to worry about."

"I bet you you're wrong," Meisa sing-songs.

Maki pauses, before replying. "I am not betting with you on whether or not Yamashita-kun will ask you out. I did that before and I've learnt my lesson."

"You're just mad that you had to call that band member of Kamenashi-kun and ask him out yourself." Meisa grins cheekily. "How's that going by the way?"

There's an unmistakable flush across Maki's cheeks before she turns. "Still not doing it." Maki goes into her bedroom as Meisa sighs, looking through her script.

--

Surprisingly, even to her--especially to her-- Yamapi's not half bad. He's cordial--probably got some kind of warning from Maki--and doesn't pester her a single bit. Which is good because going about set if she didn't like him would not help things--and Maki would likely be offended somehow.

They get along well enough--although she swears sometimes Yamapi's gaze lingers a little longer than it probably should, but that tends to flatter her more than it does annoy her. Plus, he stays out of her way when she wants him too, seeming to know when the right time is, but more importantly, when it isn't. ("See, I told you," Maki says with a smirk.

"Don't preen for too long. It doesn't suit you." Maki sticks her tongue out at Meisa.)

On her last day on set--she doesn't have terribly many scenes to film, Yamapi pulls her aside with a smile. Before he can even open his mouth, she does first. "No."

Yamapi blinks, startled. "What?"

"You were going to ask me out, weren't you?" Meisa asks, arm crossed. In her head, she cheers--only because it'll serve for fodder if she ever gets into this conversation with Maki--or you know, just for that night when she laughs at winning their kinda, but not really bet.

Yamapi scratches the back of his head, but carefully because his hair's already been prepared for shooting and Meisa figures he doesn't want to ruin it. "Well, it's more like I need a dinner date for this thing, and I was hoping--"

"Good try, but no." Meisa grins.

"Ah, well, worth a try. Maki-chan suggested that one."

Meisa narrows her eyes. "What, working against me?"

Yamapi grins, rocking on his heel. "More like, she wanted to win." Meisa's jaw drops as Yamapi waves and rushes back onto set. "Too bad, I would've liked dinner with you," he says over his shoulder.

Meisa makes sure to point out to Maki that getting Yamapi to ask her out was completely not the point of their bet. ("Maybe your bet," Maki says mysteriously with a wink before changing the topic completely.)

ii.

Meisa has to meet up with Yamapi and Koki when promotions for Byakkotai are starting up. She doesn't do as many of them (read: she only does one, but she's not really surprised or offended), but she's thankful because it means less chances of seeing them.

Yamapi waves at her with a grin, before settling down on the makeup chair. Koki who's already done stands next to her--she's also done--before greeting her nicely. "It's good to see you again."

Meisa raises her eyebrow. "You don't have to strike up conversation just because we're standing together," Meisa says bluntly.

Koki shrugs. "But the silence is annoying."

"Right..." Meisa says slowly, half urging the makeup artist in her mind to hurry it up so they can get started and then she can leave.

"Listen," Koki starts and Meisa turns to look at him, eyebrow still raised.

"Mm?"

"If you're free tonight--"

"No," Meisa says abruptly. "Your friend over there." Meisa jerks her head towards Yamapi who is obviously listening with a half-grin, half-smirk on his lips. "Already tried. And just. No."

Koki stuffs his hands into his pockets. "Well, a guy's gotta try."

"Maybe less is more," Meisa snorts which starts Yamapi off while Koki raises an eyebrow--she's read those articles about him. She smiles cheekily before the makeup artist pushes Yamapi out of the chair with a gruff, "You're done." Which sets Meisa off. In a way, she's a little sad that this is over--they're not terribly bad, she supposes.

"You should really tell Maki-chan to stop match-making you," Yamapi murmurs at one point, hand dangerously low on her back. Meisa only glares at him, coughs pointedly--he thankfully lifts said hand--before shaking her head.

"Maki wouldn't be doing something like that. And if she was, definitely not with Johnny's boys."

Yamapi chuckles. "Maybe she knows something you don't."

Meisa scoffs before they start up the interview.

iii.

Meisa just thinks she's heavily unlucky when her next job ends up being with another Johnny's boy.

Maki shrugs. "I've never worked with him either, so don't look at me," she says, sucking on a lollipop and flipping through a script. Meisa raises an eyebrow at her.

"By the way, what's this about you trying to match-make me?"

Maki doesn't even blink an eye. "Oh, did Yamashita-kun say that? He's just being silly. Doesn't like to accept when he's been rejected."

"Uh-huh," Meisa says suspiciously, but she lets it go--she's letting a lot of things go, it seems.

--

"Ne, Meisa-chan," Nino says cheerfully, already familiar with her--so it seems--in just a few weeks. "Are you busy tonight?" He beams at her, scarily close and Meisa has to step back to get back her personal space.

She blinks before snapping incredulously, "Don't you have a girlfriend?"

"Masami-chan? Ah, that reminds me, I should call her." Nino shakes his head. "No, wait. I was just wondering if you'd like to celebrate the first episode airing!"

"...You still have a girlfriend."

Nino grins. "Yes, I do. That's why this is not a date."

"But it feels like you're inviting me on one." Meisa crosses her arms.

NIno shrugs. "Maybe because you want to go on one with me?" he smirks wickedly at her and Meisa finally realizes why people say Nino can be a downright asshole sometimes.

"Yeah, no," Meisa says, shaking her head as she turns around and walks away.

"The offer's always open!" Nino calls out before she hears him pull out his cell phone, punching at some number and saying loudly--to the point that she can hear halfway down the hall, "Masami-chan! How are you?"

Meisa rolls her eyes. ("Seriously, I don't understand why a guy with a girlfriend would ask someone out like that. How does Nagasawa-san deal with that?"

Maki blinks at her thoughtfully. "Ninomiya-kun has a girlfriend? Didn't know that."

Meisa stares. "Why do you only take that part out of this?" Maki shrugs, painting dark red nail polish on another one of Meisa's toenails--Meisa looks at her suspiciously.)

iv.

She meets him at the start-up party for One Pound Gospel, and honestly, Meisa's a little surprised to even see him there--it's not often that group members would crash parties like this.

"I was invited," Jin says pointedly, raising his glass towards Kame who's chatting with one of their co-stars.

Meisa raises an eyebrow. "Okay, but that doesn't explain why you're standing here and talking to me."

He looks at her with a grin, and Meisa gets the distinct feeling that he's looking at her like she's not wearing anything on--which she is, thanks. "Why would I want to talk to anyone else when you're here?"

"Wow," Meisa says with a laugh. "You're smoother than I thought."

"Thank you." Jin grins, winking at her before taking a sip of his drink.

"Don't thank me, you suck. You're just better than I thought." Meisa watches in amusement as Jin chokes on his sip, then turning towards her with slight awe.

"And you're snappier than I thought, but that's hot."

Meisa scoffs in disgust. "You would say something disgusting like that." She grabs the drink from his hand, swallows it down then beams at him brightly. "It was nice meeting you. Although not really."

She walks away in a bit of a huff, passing by Kame who gives her this glance before she waves him bye with a smile.

Kame gives her a smile in return, half bowing as she leaves.

i.

When Maki first finds out that Meisa's going to work with Kame in her next drama, she's more excited than Meisa thinks she should be. "Kamenashi-kun is really nice. You'll like him, I'll bet!"

Meisa scoffs at her--Maki's been wrong before.

Except this time, she's actually not. "Kuroki-san, right?" Kame greets, smiling. "Maki-chan told me to look out for you."

Meisa rolls her eyes. "I don't need to be babied," she snaps, frowning.

Kame quirks an eyebrow. "I figured. That's why I told her that I'm sure you'll do fine."

Pause. "Thank you," Meisa ends up saying, blinking at him in confusion.

Kame gives her a nod before waving. "We'll probably be seeing each other a lot, so let's work well together."

Meisa nods back. "Yeah. Let's work well together."

That night, Meisa can't think of a single thing to tell Maki when she asks expectingly, "So? What do you think?"

"I. He's not half bad, I guess."

Maki grins widely. "I knew you'd like him."

"No, I don't," Meisa argues. "He's just better at first impressions than most people. That's all."

Maki laughs before shaking her head. "Want me to do your hair for tomorrow?"

"I'll be wearing a habit. There's really no point," Meisa says dryly.

"But what about when you enter the studio? These things are important."

Meisa thinks Maki's being ridiculous.

--

"I'm sorry," Kame apologizes with a slight flush on his face as they're getting dressed to go back to the studio after some interview.

Meisa shakes her head. "It's okay. I mean, it's not the first time I've been asked to feel up my co-stars."

"Really?" Kame asks with mild surprise.

"Well, no. But I was trying to make you feel better."

Kame stares at her before laughing. "That's nice of you, thanks. I don't think it helped, but thanks."

Meisa blushes--she never blushes, what is this?--while she stares into the locker she was standing in front of. "Yeah, no problem."

"Well, I'll see you outside," Kame says, walking out the door while Meisa finishes getting ready. She sits down first, startled before wondering to herself. Why had she done that?

--

She doesn't want to admit it, but she's actually grown to like Kame. ("I told you you would," Maki sing-songs. Meisa only glares, but Maki's laughter is infectious and she can't hold it for too long.) Meisa doesn't actually know why and that slightly frustrates her, but at the same time, she's not entirely sure she minds. She also hopes he doesn't notice, more importantly. She's not supposed to like a Johnny's boy--she'd pretty much forbidden it of herself. Minus that mild crush on Koichi--but really, could she be blamed?

With wrap-up approaching, Meisa wonders if she's actually going to do something about this--she won't, she knows she won't because sometimes, she can be just as bad as Maki is at actually doing something instead of just thinking it.

"What, do I need to come up with a bet just so I can get you to ask him out?" Maki asks incredulously.

"It worked for you, but I don't think so." Meisa continues flipping through her script.

"I bet you that he'll call you in ten minutes."

"What?" Meisa snorts. "No way. I don't think he even has my number."

They don't even have to wait ten minutes, the phone rings in the next two. Meisa's eyebrows furrow as she stares at her phone--an unknown number--before Maki looks over and grins. "That would be Kamenashi-kun's phone number."

Meisa almost drops it in her surprise. "What?!"

"Answer it!" Maki exclaims while Meisa pushes the still-ringing phone towards Maki.

"I am not answering this! You answer!"

"It's your phone," Maki hisses, pushing it back towards her. It's almost like a tug of war battle, except backwards, that ends when the phone suddenly stops ringing. Maki frowns, blowing a hair out of her eyes. "You should've answered." She crosses her arms, looking down at Meisa with mild disappointment.

"You shouldn't have given him my number!" Meisa retorts back, pushing her phone far away from her.

"I didn't!"

"Then you shouldn't have gotten your boyfriend to give him my number," Meisa amends.

"I didn't do that either," Maki insists, sitting back down on the couch.

"Then how--" Maki shrugs.

--

"Hey, I called you yesterday," Kame greets her with the next day. Meisa almost drops her prop--a rosary--in surprise.

"Oh, was that you? It was unknown so I didn't answer," Meisa lies smoothly, pointedly avoiding Kame's stare. "How'd you get my number anyway?"

"Yamapi passed it to me a while back, saying that I would probably need it at some point." Meisa turns to Kame abruptly, jaw open.

"How does he have my number?"

Kame shrugs. "Maki-chan? I don't know." Meisa thinks she's going to kill Maki when she gets home. "But I was calling to ask--"

"No," Meisa says abruptly, trying not to swallow.

Kame blinks at her. "You didn't even know what I was going to say."

"You were going to ask me out." Meisa adjusts her habit--suddenly feeling really hot.

"Well, yes," Kame says almost grudgingly. "But why not?"

Meisa starts. She's never actually been asked that--and in this case, she really doesn't have an answer, other than a "Just because." Which she ends up saying.

"Well okay," he says with a shrug and a half-smile in her direction. "Worth a try."

--

"YOU TURNED HIM DOWN?" Maki stares at her, wide-eyed before glaring--Meisa almost feels guilty.

"Yes," Meisa manages to say--even though she's kind of scared at the look in Maki's eyes.

"I cannot believe. After all--After everything, you. I." Maki throws up her hands in the air before sliding into the dining room chair. "Why?"

"Just because."

Maki's glare only gets heavier. "That might work with him, but it's not going to work with me. What's your real answer?"

"I don't. I don't really know." Meisa fumbles with her hands.

Maki's eyes soften before she sighs. "Is this about your decision never to get involved with a Johnny's boy because I told you before it's ridiculous."

"It's not," Meisa insists. "I don't think we'd work anyway. Plus, before I forget, what's this about you giving my number to Yamashita-kun?"

Maki goes red. "Ah. Right. I'd forgotten about that."

"Why are you so hardpressed on match-making me anyway? And don't say you aren't, because you obviously are. And only with Johnny's boys at that."

"Because I'm trying to get rid of that bias you have. Not all of them are horrible, you know."

"Said perfectly by someone that's dating one."

"Says the one who's crushing on one."

"I am not!" Meisa crosses her arms.

"So then why will one dinner hurt?" Maki raises an eyebrow. Meisa pauses.

"I swear, you're manipulating me. You're not supposed to do that. I am."

Maki laughs. "Living with you for so many years, something had to catch on." Meisa rolls her eyes. "Now, why don't you call Kamenashi-kun back and I'll fix your hair for your date tomorrow."

"It's like you already have this planned," Meisa grumbles as she pulls out her phone.

Kame's more than a little surprised to hear from her, but he accepts the date nonetheless. Maki grins at her from across the table.

--

"You know, you don't have to do this if it's an obligation," Kame says over the table.

Meisa fidgets in her seat, shaking her head. "No, it's nothing like that," she insists. When she looks up, Meisa's slightly caught between staring and trying not to look obvious as Kame flips through the menu, eyebrows furrowed as he looks at the choices. She curses herself in her head before looking back down at her own menu.

"Is this awkward?" Kame asks a few minutes later after they sit in silence, just sipping their water.

"A little," Meisa answers truthfully. She sighs while Kame chuckles.

"Well, when you're doing this for someone else and not for yourself," Kame says before Meisa shakes her head abruptly.

"Really, this wasn't for anyone--"

Kame shakes his head. "Really, I won't be mad, Kuroki-san. Maki-chan's really good at convincing people, ne?"

Meisa starts. "Did she convince you?" she asks, suddenly suspicious.

"Not really," Kame answers. "Maybe a little push. But the rest was just me."

Meisa wonders if there's a confession in there somewhere, but she doesn't really want to figure it out. "Well, Maki-chan gets it all from me anyway," Meisa jokes.

"So that's all your influence? I should've known," Kame snorts. "She wasn't like this three years ago."

"Hey. It was not all me," Meisa says with a laugh. "I'm pretty sure that bandmate of yours had some influence over it."

"Oh please, Nakamaru? That guy is like the epitome of innocence. If he didn't have a girlfriend right now, I'd be willing to bet he'd be single."

Meisa rolls her eyes. "Are you sure you're just not talking for yourself? I don't see a girlfriend around."

Kame only snorts. "Doesn't mean I don't have one."

"Do you?" Meisa asks pointedly, twirling her straw around in her glass.

Kame pauses. "No, but that's not the point." Meisa cracks up.

--

"We should do this again," Kame says at the end as he's dropping Meisa off in front of her apartment--he'd insisted. It was the proper thing to do after all. Meisa blinks at him, a little startled by the sudden skip her heart had made.

"I-" She starts before he smiles at her.

"Don't say no just to say no."

Meisa snorts, shaking her head. "If I say no, then I'll have a good reason to."

"Really? Then I'm asking you on a second date."

Meisa stares, and then frowns. "No."

Kame laughs like he'd expected her to say exactly that. "Why not?"

"Because I'm asking you out for next time."

Kame goes silent fast--that one he hadn't. "What?"

"We should have a second date," Meisa says with a grin. "Sound like a good idea?"

Kame returns it. "Yeah. It does. No matter who asks."

Her grin gets wider. "Good. Because I'll probably ask more times than you."

"Making it a bet?" Kame raises an eyebrow.

"Sure, why not?"

--

"I told you," Maki laughs as Meisa settles into the couch beside her.

Meisa tosses her handbag on the nearby table. "Oh, shut up and pass the ice cream." Maki grins wickedly.

Punishment

Thu, 01 Jan 2009 17:33:21 GMT

Title: Punishment
Author: tinyangl
Pairing: Ryo/Koyama.
Rating: NC-17 for blowjob. XP
Warning: ...I don't know. Blowjob?
Summary: Ryo's not very happy with Koyama's fanservice.
Note: Written for je_holiday to snoozing_kitten. I really tried for some semblance of smut, but apparently I'm so horribly rusty, all I could manage was this. T.T Thanks to J (AKA jadedfrenzy) for listening to me incessantly talk about this (in all its various turns). Excuse the lameness of title.

Koyama's not sure if it had just been a long time coming or if today's performance had just been way too much for him. He supposes he'd been teasing Ryo for half the tour--trying to find where the lines were. So Ryo tugging Koyama into the backroom, right as Tegoshi's solo is starting, and then shoving him against the wall, eyes blazing, isn't completely a surprise. "Ryo-chan," Koyama exhales. "You're hurting me." Ryo's grip only tightens around Koyama's wrist, eyes blazing with anger.

"Too far," he snaps. "It's not enough you have that gay song with Pi, but that thing with Tegoshi is ridiculous."

Koyama raises an eyebrow. "You have a little thing going on with Tegoshi too, you know."

Ryo snorts. "That's all a joke. But you straddling Tegoshi on stage like you're about to screw him is not one, and you know it," he snaps.

"Why, Ryo-chan. Is that jealousy?" Koyama teases, trying to keep the smirk from his lips.

"Hell yes, it is." Ryo moves his hands to the sides of Koyama's face and pulling Koyama towards him, lips meeting lips fiercely. Their teeth knock together, mouths molding around each other like they'd done so many times before. His kiss burns against Koyama's lips, bruising and rough and Ryo traces along the inside of Koyama's mouth with his tongue. Koyama thinks Ryo's possessive side could be adorable sometimes.

Ryo's fingers press into the side of Koyama's face, almost hard enough to leave marks, but Koyama's past caring as Ryo's hands move from his face to his hair, to the line of his ass and then around the waist to his pants. Ryo's mouth falters as his hands tug around Koyama's waistline, fumbling as he bats another feather out of his way. He pulls back, eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

"Fucking costumes," Ryo breathes frantically as he tries to find the zipper beneath all the feathers.

Koyama laughs as he bats Ryo's hands away, pushing down his own pants--he knows where everything is anyway.

"Helping me doesn't let you off the hook," Ryo snaps, hand flat on Koyama's chest, pushing Koyama back against the wall.

"And screwing me shouldn't be a punishment, but who's complaining," Koyama retorts before Ryo captures his lips again in another bruising kiss--but who's complaining.

Ryo's hands trail down the side of Koyama's side, pushing down his boxers as he presses his groin against Koyama's; Koyama pulls back, head smacking the wall painfully, moaning. Ryo slaps his hand over Koyama's mouth. "Quiet," he hisses. "We're not in private, moron."

"And in the middle of a concert," Koyama pants, trying to thrust forward for more contact, but Ryo's free hand is keeping Koyama firmly against the wall, inches of space between them.

"Don't worry. I can still hear Shige screeching out there. Still two songs left." The glimmer in Ryo's eyes is hard to miss and Koyama thinks that Ryo had this planned from the very beginning.

"They're not long songs," Koyama points out.

"It won't take me too long to crack you," Ryo snips. Koyama blinks. In that second, Ryo's on his knees, lips hovering over Koyama's erection, but never touching. Koyama gasps, hands flat on the wall behind him as Ryo simply breathes on Koyama.

"You're not fair," Koyama exhales.

"When am I ever?" With those words, Ryo takes Koyama's cock into his mouth, sliding in--his tongue along the underside. Koyama swallows, eyes shut as he tries to forget about what's going on here. It's a competition--apparently--his punishment is to bend to Ryo's will, except Koyama isn't always so keen on punishment (mainly any time Ryo thinks of one). Koyama forces himself to think of dinner later, of the other NewS members prepping, of his performance on that stage. Under those hot lights--hot costumes--hot mouth that's slowly dragging along his cock, teeth lightly scrapping skin.

Koyama exhales again, his hands finding refuge in Ryo's hair, silky locks that already have sweat intermingled with each strand. Ryo drags his tongue along the tip and Koyama has to throw his head back again, still throbbing from the last time he'd smacked his head against the wall. In that faint second, Koyama can hear the ending strains of Tegoshi's solo. One song left. His heart pounds as he thinks of how close they're cutting it; his head throbs as Massu starts to sing.

Throbbing--the thought only brings Koyama back to the fact that Ryo's mouth is on him, breathy against his skin, kisses pressed wherever they can be--along his cock and around, the inside of his thigh, one of his balls, and then right at the tip.

Koyama bites at his bottom lip, hoping it's not hard enough to cuts kin, trying to keep from moaning loudly, trying to keep from saying Ryo's name, trying to get him to stop teasing. Something, anything. He exhales harshly, digging his feet into the ground and trying to find some sense of stability.

Ryo's hands on the side of Koyama's thighs press a little harder, rougher as Ryo takes Koyama into his mouth again, back and forth, back and forth. Koyama's grip gets tighter and Ryo half-smiles around Koyama.

Then Ryo sucks hard and Koyama loses all sight--stars in his eyes as he releases into Ryo's mouth.

Koyama slumps against the wall as his knees threaten to give out underneath him, panting heavily as Ryo stands, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

"I win," Ryo says, smirking. "You gave in."

"Right, because you expected me to hold out when you're doing that," Koyama exhales.

Ryo shrugs. "And that is why I did it." He turns on his heel, heading out the door looking nowhere near intimidating with the feather hanging out the back of his jacket.

"At least I got you to swallow!" Koyama calls out towards his back just as the door shuts. Ryo doesn't come back. Koyama frowns, rushing to pull up his boxers and pants and then groaning as he thinks that he has an entire concert to go before he can dole out some sense of punishment against Ryo. "Damn it," he mumbles under his breath as he steps out of the room, quickly being ushered by frantic staff members as they tell him he's late for his cue.

Koyama curses Ryo in his head again as he grabs his microphone and runs onto the stage.

--

Next performance, Ryo gets extra close to Tegoshi during Why, almost looking like they're kissing. Ryo's eyes meet Koyama's with a glimmer of mischief. Koyama thinks that Ryo gave that one to him, but Koyama wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

He wonders if he still has those handcuffs Shige gave him as a gift.

4 AUs Where Jin Gets What He Wants and 1 That's Reality. Part 1

Thu, 01 Jan 2009 17:30:55 GMT

Title: 4 AUs Where Jin Gets What He Wants and 1 That's Reality. Part 1
Author: tinyangl
Characters: Akanishi Jin. LARGELY Akanishi Jin. Then you have NewS, KAT-TUN, Urawa Reds Football Players, Original Characters up the Wazoo, Takki, Yabu, Reio, Johnny and Nishiyama Maki (kinda) show up for a second there (blink too fast and you’ll miss it!) And just yes, lots of people in this very massive fic.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Nothing really except cursing. They drink a lot, smoke some.
Summary: Jin's said a lot of things over the years—what kind of different lives would he lead?
Notes: Written for je_holiday to pixisticks, hopefully you'll enjoy this fic and it satisfies the Jin quota. It's a massive fic that probably shouldn't have been as massive as it ended up being. ♥♥ Thanks to my beta (AKA cynicalism) for letting me babble on and on about this fic for so long. For correcting every mistake I've made and helping me better this. It desperately needed it.

i. "I want to always be with Pi, because when I am with him, even a normal day would become interesting, Pi as a pillar of NEWS is just a kid in front of me."
- Myojo ~ November 2004.

2007.

"Akanishi! Get your ass back here or I am going to-"

"You'd have to catch me first, Ryo-chan!" Jin yells over his shoulder before coming to a stop in front of a startled Koyama stepping out of the elevator. "Kei-chan!" he says gleefully before the sound of Ryo's yells get closer and closer. "See you later!" he waves to a still stunned Koyama who waves back awkwardly. Ryo dashes by, a streak of blonde, and Koyama just stands there, rather confused and lost before Shige comes by and pats him on the back, leading him into their dance room. "Come on, Ryo-chan!" Jin cries out behind his shoulder. "It was only an innocent joke!"

"Switching my bento with only pickles is not an innocent joke, Akanishi!"

Jin cracks up, his lead faltering as he dashes down the corridor. His misstep causes him to slow down enough for Ryo to catch up to him and tackle him to the ground, tickling his sides. Jin can't even think of resisting; he's too busy laughing. "Everyone else thought it was funny!" he says in between his giggles. Ryo gets up, stopping his attack.

Ryo glares, sitting on Jin's stomach. "Yes, but I'm the one without lunch."

"It's not like I stole your lunch or anything. I gave it to Shige." Jin grins widely. "Was going to give it to Massu, but thought better of it."

Ryo rises then falls back down, putting all his weight into it.

Jin hides his cough. "You weigh like nothing."

Ryo huffs before getting up and walking back to their practice room. Jin follows behind him, hand on his stomach as he smarts from the impact—small or not, it still hurt. Inside the rehearsal room, most of NewS is already warming up except Massu who’s still eating lunch.

"Shige," Jin calls out, gesturing towards Ryo. "Give Ryo-chan his bento before he starts crying." Ryo punches him in the shoulder as Shige blinks innocently at Jin.

"Eh? That wasn't-" Shige falters, glancing at Massu in the corner of his eye. Jin pales off the glare from Ryo's face.

"You-You didn't-" Jin stumbles, trying to think of the best escape route out the room and out of Ryo's grasp.

It takes another minute of Shige glancing awkwardly at Massu who's absolutely oblivious to Shige's glances and just chewing his food, chatting nonchalantly with Tegoshi—Jin half-wonders if he's really listening—of Jin's wide eyes and of Ryo's glare. "I didn't," Shige finally says to Jin's enormous relief, pulling out Ryo's still full bento from his backpack and handing it to Ryo. "But I couldn't miss the look on your face."

Jin glares at Shige darkly. "Remember the days when you were quiet and kept to yourself?"

"Yeah, I also remember you picking on me because I was quiet and kept to myself," Shige snorts, bending at the waist to touch his toes.

"Are you saying that I made you this way?"

"Basically, yes." Shige manages to dodge the hit from Jin, only to tumble to the side. Jin takes that as a bit of comeuppance, no matter how small. When he starts to stretch, he finally realizes that their dance instructor is staring at them, and not a good stare at that.

"Hi, sensei?" Jin says weakly.

His instructor's gaze only narrows.

--

Sometimes, Jin thinks that he hangs out with Yamapi and Ryo more than one should—not only do they work together being in the same group, but they constantly go out to eat, drink, pick up chicks, maybe karaoke. If it were possible to get a Yamapi and Ryo overload, Jin thinks he reached that point ages ago.

A pillow hits Jin squarely on the face—a hit Jin takes laughing. "Stop screeching like an alley cat already!" Ryo yells into the microphone.

"I was only imitating you!" Jin retorts, just as loud as Ryo.

Yamapi's laughter bounces off the walls before he snatches the microphone from Ryo's hand, continuing the song—although he doesn't do any better than Jin in the matter. He's fortunate though to at least get more than the few seconds Jin was allowed to sing before a pillow flies into his face.

"Seriously! I didn't come to karaoke to get my ear drums shot!" Ryo scowls.

Jin cracks up before the door opens and the rest of NewS comes spilling into the room, bags of food and drinks in hands. The three in the room greet them with equal amount of cheer before Ryo takes the microphone from Yamapi and proceeds to sing the last minute of the song. Jin looks up as Koyama and Shige settle into the couch right beside Yamapi while Tegoshi and Massu sit on Ryo's other side.

"Hey! Where's my food?!" Yamapi frowns, pushing bags out of his way after looking through them.

Massu passes him the one in his hand. "It's in this one, Yamashita-kun!"

"Ne, Ryo-tan, want to share lunch?" Tegoshi asks, pushing his bento towards Ryo, chopsticks already in hand.

Ryo shrugs. "Sure." Tegoshi feeds him with a grin, asking him if he'd liked it and Ryo grins back, nodding. "Yeah, that was delicious." Jin resists from gagging.

"Ah! Where's my lunch?!" Shige exclaims before digging through the remaining dishes.
Jin blinks, hugging his bento tightly as Shige narrows his eyes in Jin's direction.

"Eh?! I don't have it!"

"This isn't revenge for earlier, is it?" Shige scowls.

Jin shakes his head vigorously and Shige makes a lunge towards Jin's bento before Koyama pulls him back, pushing a bento onto Shige's lap. "Baka, this is your lunch. Should pay more attention."

Shige blinks, looking down at his bento. "Ah. Sorry, Akanishi-kun," he says sheepishly.
Jin sticks his tongue out before starting on his food. He can faintly hear Tegoshi starting on a new song with Yamapi singing along underneath his breath beside Jin. Jin resists from grinning—a scene like this one was nowhere near possible when they had first been formed.

--

2003.

When Yamapi and Ryo are called to Johnny's office, Jin is fortunate enough to be around as well, walking with them and coming up with outrageous reasons for why they could possibly be called. Johnny opens the door to let them in and catches sight of Jin hanging around by the couches.

Jin bows properly—because he knows better than to piss off the President of the Jimusho—before Johnny eyes him and then tells him to come into the office too. Jin's heart practically flies out of his chest as he wonders if he'd done anything bad in the past week or something.

When he enters, it's only Yamapi and Ryo inside and they give Jin a confused look, to which he shrugs in reply. Jin stands next to the two as Johnny takes a seat in front of them.

The next few words out of Johnny's mouth stun the three boys to silence.

"Wait, what about our old groups?" Yamapi asks helplessly—Jin knows he's thinking of 4Tops.

Johnny shakes his head at Yamapi. "No need to worry. NewS is only temporary."

Yamapi doesn't let out a breath of relief, but the other two know it's there.

"The photo shoot for the single will be tomorrow morning, and I need the three of you there at 9 sharp."

They nod at the same time, most likely afraid of anything that would come out of their mouths.

Johnny smiles at them. "Great. Have fun, and don't worry about your old groups. It'll all work out."

--

Johnny lied. NewS was anything but temporary. Jin can still remember the devastated look on Yamapi's face when 4Tops was officially broken up. It was something he never wanted to see on anyone's face ever again.

--

But Jin only has to look in a mirror because a week later, he's replaced in KAT-TUN by another A—Akiyama Jun—and is told that he's meant to only focus on NewS.

Jin confronts Ryo who is fortunate enough to still be in Kanjani8. "Why are you the one that's able to stay in your old group?"

"Only one of us can be around?"

"Uchi's also in two groups," Jin says dryly.

"Because your work ethic sucks," Ryo retorts, changing tracks.

Jin chucks his empty beer can at Ryo's head. "You're not comforting me whatsoever."

"I never signed up for that. Can I back out?"

Jin throws his head in his arms and shuts his eyes, grumpy and depressed. When he opens them next, he realizes with a start that the room's dark and a blanket's resting over his shoulders. He sighs—Ryo's always been a lot nicer than he lets on.

--

2004.

After the announcement that NewS is permanent and that they're releasing another single—Kibou ~Yell~—Jin throws himself into the new group, realizing that he doesn't really know anyone in NewS other than Yamapi and Ryo, and Uchi by proxy. There is a whole other half of the group to know, five (used to be six) members whose names Jin only vaguely knows. One of them being that fanboy of Yamapi's who Jin never failed to use to tease Yamapi.

"Wait, what's that kid's name again?" Jin asks Yamapi as they stand against a wall right before they go onto Shounen Club, pointing at one with dark brownish orange hair. Oh, and single eyelids.

"Koyama," Yamapi sighs, shaking his head. "Remember? He's the one that's going to Meiji? I asked him for advice?"

If Jin's heard that before, he doesn't recall it whatsoever. He nods anyway. "Yeah sure. How about the kid beside him?"

Yamapi pauses as he narrows his eyes at the black-haired kid with random streaks of gold in his hair. "I think… Kusano? Or was that Shige?"

Yamapi continues pondering which one is which, but Jin's already left him, approaching Shige with a firm "Which are you?"

Shige blinks, turns to Koyama helplessly but all he gets is a weak shrug. "Er. Which?" Shige repeats.

"Yeah. Kusano or Shige?" He can hear the start of Koyama's giggles, but Jin continues with his questions. "I don't mean to be rude or anything, but I just can't keep everyone's name straight and well, it's hard to keep track when half of you don't speak."

Shige blinks again. "Uh. Shige. I'm Shige, Akanishi-kun."

"Oh, cool then! Nice to actually meet you, Shige." With that, Jin turns on his heel and returns to Yamapi to let him know the answer, and from that, they figure out which one Kusano—the kid with the slight Mohawk that falls over his eyes.

Still, for at least two months after, Yamapi and Jin don't get the two straight.

Jin hears Koyama patting Shige on the back and telling him that at least it'd make a funny story in the future when they finally do get it right.

(Four years or so later when Shige does remember, he makes it a point to mix up Yamapi and Jin's names for about two weeks. Jin thinks it's absolutely hysterical; Yamapi isn't as fond, but he takes the abuse anyway.)

--

2005.

When Jin does finally get the two straight, he bonds with them in completely different ways—Jin's interest in English had been growing steadily and it turns out that Shige's not half bad at the language himself (even telling Jin a story about how he'd talked to his teacher in English about Johnny's Jimusho—Jin couldn't stop laughing). Kusano is almost, almost as good as Jin is in dancing, and maybe even singing (Yamapi thinks Jin just doesn't want to be overtaken by anyone), and frequently, the two practice together, trying to improve their skills. Tegoshi often joins them—mainly when they're practicing and training their voices; Massu joins them too, but he comes during the dancing lessons.

Jin thinks that even if they are the juniors that came out of nowhere to join their group, they're really not half bad. He even manages to convince Yamapi to come around whenever he's free.

"Please," Ryo snorts when Jin approaches him. "You're kidding, right?"

"What?" Jin blinks. "It's kinda fun."

"Working more? Who are you and where the hell is Akanishi?"

Jin sticks his tongue out. "And what do you suggest, genius?"

"If it's singing, then obviously karaoke. Dancing, we could just go clubbing. You're such an idiot."

"We don't want to risk going clubbing just yet. Who's the idiot now?" Jin retorts, arms crossed.

"Whatever. Just think of something interesting and then I'll think on it."

"You know, you do have to interact with these people."

Ryo gives him a cheeky smile. "I do that enough. Especially when I hang out with you. It's like hanging out with a combination of them."

Jin pauses then shrugs. "Well, in a way that's actually accurate."

"Idiot," Ryo laughs. "Anyway, I gotta get going. Meeting Uchi for some kind of dinner thing."

"'Kay," Jin says, waving as Ryo rushes out of the room, his bag slung over his shoulder.

--

Jin gets a call from Ryo late that night. "Uchi got caught drinking underage." Jin can't think of what to say to make anything better. "There's going to be a meeting in the morning," Ryo continues after Jin's mouth drops open and closes about five times—he counted—without a single word coming out.

"Ryo," Jin finally says, the only thing he can think to say.

"I'll see you in the morning," Ryo abruptly says, cutting off any thoughts that could’ve formed in Jin’s head.

"Right. Morning." As soon as the words leave Jin's mouth, the dial tone resonates on the other line. Jin sighs, rubbing a hand against his forehead.

He can't sleep for the rest of the night.

--

Nobody knows how to act around Ryo for weeks after the news of Uchi's headline and suspension—to be fair, Ryo doesn't make it easy for anyone. He sits off to the side of the rehearsal room, making it a point that nobody goes near him and scowling when someone approaches even if it's Yamapi or Jin.

"Are we going to keep tiptoeing around Nishikido-kun?" Shige asks Jin, frowning as Jin helps him with his stretches.

"I guess." Jin has an identical frown on his face. "He won't even talk to Yamapi. That's when you know it's bad."

"At least he hasn't been drinking," Yamapi says darkly.

"I don't think Nishikido-kun can be around alcohol right now anyway," Tegoshi points out. They all watch as Ryo stretches, not looking at any of the other members.

"Stop staring at me," Ryo barks suddenly from across the room and everyone's gaze abruptly switches from Ryo to each other. Still, nobody can really concentrate.

--

Halfway through Ryo's shooting of One Litre of Tears, Jin realizes that Ryo's suddenly acting normal again. "Are you okay?" Jin asks out of the blue after Ryo shoves Shige lightly, laughing at some stupid joke he'd made.

Ryo raises an eyebrow. "Idiot." He turns away, striking up a new conversation with Koyama. Jin doesn't care to elaborate when he sees the grin on Ryo's face; Jin thinks he's doing just fine.

--

2006.

It's Massu who calls him when the next big thing happens—they'd arranged a sort of system so if something happened, not one person would have to do all the calling. It'd started after Yamapi had found out about his co-starring role with Kame in Nobuta wo Produce, and even though Yamapi had spent half the night calling everyone, he still managed to miss one person. (Tegoshi came into work the next day devastated and wondering what this meant for NewS if Yamapi was going to make a single with Kame. Jin spent an hour calming Tegoshi down, and then another hour arranging the phone system with Koyama.)

"It's Kusano," Massu says simply, sounding near tears.

"What about Kusano?" Jin asks, sitting up abruptly in his bed and throwing off the blankets. He's practically ready to fly out the door and race to the hospital if need be.

"He got caught drinking." Jin can feel his stomach plummet within seconds.

"What?" Jin asks, voice cracking in the middle.

"There's going to be a meeting in the morning. I think we're really in trouble this time," Massu says, choking on his words.

"No, nono. It'll be fine. I don't…" Jin licks his lips. "It'll be fine. I'm sure it's just a mistake. Kusano wouldn't do something like that."

"Un," Massu replies. "I'll let you go so you can call Ryo then."

"Right." Jin's not really paying attention, wondering what he is going to say to Ryo. Massu's gone before Jin realizes and Jin stares at his cell phone, Ryo's number in front of him. He doesn't know what he's going to say, but he feels bad for Ryo who has to call Tegoshi right after. He feels doubly bad for being relieved in a sense.

--

The news ends up not being good. NewS is suspended without any information about if they're coming back and if yes, when.

Jin hates that the plummeting in his stomach feeling hasn't left for half a year. He thought it had—he thought they were okay, happy, finally recovered from everything. Everyone's faces—corners of their lips down, eyes refusing to meet Kusano's, and the absolute quiet—they're never quiet, not if Jin could help it—says so much more.

When they leave the office, Kusano collapses against a nearby wall, tears streaming down his face but no words coming out of his mouth. Everyone just watches him; none of them can say a word. Tegoshi's hands clutch Massu's arms and Jin can see his silent tears stream down his face.

"Did you drink?" Ryo asks harshly, breaking the silence after a good five minutes.

"No!" Kusano insists. "I wouldn't! Not after-" His words stop there as Yamapi places a firm hand on his shoulder.

"We believe you, Kusano." His voice is rough, a different kind of rough—like he's trying his best not to break out into tears. "We can get through it. It's just a little bump."

"But it's not," Jin hears himself say. He claps a hand over his mouth, startled by the sound of his own voice. Everyone's eyes are on him and Jin suddenly feels like shrinking, disappearing. Despite his better judgment, Jin elaborates, "It's not just a little bump. We're disbanded. Put on hiatus for who knows how long. Maybe forever."

Ryo growls next to him, and next thing Jin knows, Ryo's pushed him up against the wall. "We know that already! We don't need you to repeat it back to us."

"Stop it!" Yamapi yells as Koyama and Shige pull Ryo off Jin, although it doesn't take them much effort. Jin slumps against the wall as Tegoshi and Massu rush to his side, Massu helping to keep him upright. "We should just go home, get some sleep. We have the rest of the tour left and the announcement," Yamapi says firmly.

Jin looks up to meet Yamapi’s eyes. Yamapi refuses to look at him though, sharply turning towards Kusano. "I'll take Kusano home and let his parents know what happened."

They make nods of agreement, even a noise from some of them. And slowly, they walk through the front door of the building, not sure when the next time they'll enter as a group.

Jin finds himself at some family restaurant with Koyama and Shige—glasses of water in front of them, but not a single word to be spoken. Jin likes it better that way.

--

The tour is completely and utterly awkward, to say the least. On stage, the remaining 7 members manage to put on a good enough show—smiles and conversation and playfulness, despite everyone in the audience knowing what's to come. Backstage though, Jin hates how suddenly they've regressed back to the time they first came together.

In a way, Jin wonders if he made it worse by saying what he had said. But he pushes the thought out of his head, tries hard to anyway, and lets everyone act as cold and distant as they had way back when.

While Jin hates this whole situation, half of him is relieved—it'll be much easier to break ties when they're not friends.

Jin hates himself more for thinking like this.

--

Jin thinks it's slightly hysterical when he hears that KAT-TUN's going to debut in the middle of NewS' tour. "No hard feelings?" Kame asks when most of the members—minus Akiyama who doesn't know Jin enough to intrude—drop by Jin's apartment to tell him the news.

"I'm not part of your group anymore," Jin says honestly. "I haven't been for years. You didn't need to come here for my permission." He walks inside his apartment, leaving the door open for the rest to enter.

Koki and Ueda exchange looks before Koki comments, "But it has to sting. Going on hiatus and watching your other group debut."

"When you put it that way," Jin jokes, pulling out beers from his refrigerator and passing them to the others. "Look," Jin says, popping off the cap and taking a swig of beer. "The way I see it, you guys deserve it after everything. You can't even say KAT-TUN is my other group when it's been 3 years since we've worked together."

"But," Nakamaru starts, the beer of bottle unopened in his hands.

"Hey. All I can say or should say is "Congratulations." And you worked hard for this debut." Jin gives them a crooked smile before lifting his bottle up to them and taking another swig. "Now, why don't you guys open up those beers and stay over for a while? I could use the company."

They exchange glances before Taguchi says enthusiastically, "We should've come panning then!"

Jin blinks before taking the beer away from Taguchi. "Maybe not with you." Taguchi beams and Jin rolls his eyes, handing it back. "Some things never change, huh?"

"Tell us about it," Koki snorts before they settle on Jin’s couch.

--

Jin only gets the idea of going to America after he talks to one of his friends, some stupid friend who makes some off-handed remark about how if Jin likes speaking in English so much, why doesn't he go to America?

It gets Jin thinking though—why doesn't he go to America? He doesn't have anything particularly tying him to Japan at that moment—not when he doesn't have any acting jobs, not when NewS is on "hiatus," not when his friends aren't really talking to him anymore.

"That sounds like a good idea," Johnny says when Jin goes to his office to ask for permission. "It'll give you something to do during the break, and it'll be something to bring back to the group when you come back."

"Yes, sir," Jin murmurs. "Thank you for the opportunity." He only says that second part to be polite, because as Koyama once told him, politeness will get you honey, curtness will get you bees. (Jin swore that Koyama had made the phrase up, but after Jin had been nice to their dance teacher—who, admittedly, did not like Jin whatsoever—Jin managed to get even a "Well done" which he would never have gotten before. Koyama had shot him a please grin when he'd heard that.)

When Jin leaves the room, he isn't quite sure he's ready for what he's done. But in the end, what's done is done. Jin walks out of the building, ready to tell everyone his big—maybe good, maybe bad—news.

--

Koyama and Massu are overwhelmingly happy for him. "Good for you!" Massu cheers as they talk over slices of cake. "It'll be exciting, ne? Going to America and learning more English."

"I'll help you pack and prepare!" Koyama says cheerfully, even though they both know that the job will probably end up being done the day before Jin's flight.

Shige, predictably, takes the more educational route. "Well, you have to prepare for it. Make sure you choose the right school too."

Yamapi doesn't say much, not that Jin'd expected him to. He's stoic to the end, especially as of late, and Jin wonders if Yamapi realizes how dark the bags are under his eyes. "Pi," Jin starts.

"I think that's great," Yamapi says with a crooked smile. He stirs his iced tea with his straw, ice clinking against the glass. "When you come back, you'll have to teach me something."

Jin agrees, then jokes, "But it'll be hard to teach you how to be as awesome as me." Yamapi punches him lightly on the shoulder.

His meeting with Tegoshi turns out better than he'd expected—Jin had been strangely worried about it. "That's really exciting!" Tegoshi chirps. "Do you think Johnny-san will let me join you?"

Jin laughs a little. "Not when you're in the middle of shooting a drama."

"True. But My Boss, My Hero should be ending soon!" Tegoshi laughs again. "Maybe I can join you afterwards."

"Interested in learning English?" Jin asks, a little surprised at Tegoshi's insistence.

"Not really," Tegoshi answers, but stops there and moves on to another topic—soccer. It takes Jin until the end of the day to realize that Tegoshi's insistence was something closer to Jin's heart—he wasn't (and shouldn't think he was) the only one smarting from the split up.

It's Ryo who makes Jin really think about his decision. Jin goes to his apartment in Tokyo on the last night before he goes to Osaka for some job with Kanjani8.

"Come on, Akanishi! Who do you think you're kidding?" Ryo growls, kicking a nearby wall. "You really think now is a good time to leave? Now? After everything we've gone through, you decide to go to L.A.?" Ryo doesn't add the thought "When we need you the most?" but Jin can hear it hanging at the end of his questions—an accusation.

Jin wavers under Ryo's harsh gaze, but Jin knows what he wants, what he needs. "It's because of everything that's going on," Jin says quietly.

"Fine, asshole," Ryo says—voice eerily steady. He picks up a nearby pillow, chucking it at Jin's face with as much strength as he can muster; Jin doesn't dare to move. "Get out of here. Run if you like." Jin half wonders if Ryo's only talking about his apartment.

Jin does as he says though, leaves Ryo's apartment quietly, not feeling any better than when he'd arrived—not that he'd actually expected to feel better. When Jin finally leaves, he doesn't see Ryo—just the uncomfortable glances from the NewS members as they see him off.

For the entire time Jin's in L.A., Ryo's words always hover somewhere in the back of his head and Jin can't stop himself from wondering if that was what he was doing by leaving Japan.

But then one of his friends passes him a beer and Jin forgets the question for another day.

--

All of NewS is at the airport when Jin comes back from America, albeit scattered all over to avoid notice. It's Koyama and Shige that meet him at the gate, and Jin's more than surprised to see them.

"Shouldn't you not be here?" Jin asks, eyes wide as he clutches his bag tighter.

"Don't worry," Shige grins. "Johnny slipped the reporters the wrong date. They think you're coming back tomorrow."

Koyama gives Jin a once over, tilts his head to the side and mumbles, "You've been eating a lot, haven't you?"

Jin wraps an arm around his waist, frowning. "I know I've gotten chubbier, but-"

"You look good," Koyama reassures him. "Happier than when you left."

"Eh?" But before Jin can ask him to elaborate, they run into Tegomass. Tegoshi tackles Jin with a hug, looking much different than Jin can remember which Jin says right off the bat.

"Puberty," Shige mumbles underneath his breath, but Jin manages to hear him and laughs in response.

"Eh? What'd you say, Shige?" Tegoshi asks, blinking innocently—he seems to have gotten that down pat while Jin was gone.

Massu shakes his head. "It wasn't anything, Tegoshi," he responds after Shige shakes his head, refusing to say a word.

"Ah. Also, I saw the news about your single. Congratulations!" Jin says, grinning at the two.

Massu and Tegoshi look down, slightly flushing at it. "Thanks," Massu replies.

"Your English was atrocious though."

Tegoshi sticks his tongue out. "Sorry we're not as great as you are, Akanishi-kun."

"If only, if only?" Jin jokes before Massu laughs, helping Jin pull the last of his suitcases from the baggage claim.

When they reach the doors, Jin is mildly disappointed to see only Yamapi—Yamapi with his cap pulled down so low that Jin thinks it must be cutting off circulation and huge sunglasses that they take up half his face. "Welcome back, Bakanishi."

Jin engulfs him in a hug so tight that even Jin loses sense of breathing for as long as it lasts. "I'm glad to be back," Jin murmurs—and it's striking to him just how true the words are.

"Idiots. How long are you going to stand there?" The words cause Jin to pull back from Yamapi sharply, practically tossing him aside as he stares straight at Ryo who's standing by the doorway, hands stuffed in his pockets.

"Ryo." Jin hadn't at all expected Ryo to be there—but he'd hoped. They hadn't spoken for six—no, seven months after all. "You're-"

"Stupid. Of course I'd come to see if you were still alive or not," Ryo says curtly, but Jin doesn't care. He takes five steps forward and pulls Ryo into a tight hug. "I'm not made of fluff like you are! Stop squeezing!" Ryo yelps.

Jin doesn't feel like ever letting go.

--

Jin returns mid-December, just in time for Johnny to tell them—thankfully not last minute—that they're returning as a group for Countdown. They cheer all around him, although they try to keep it as low-key as possible, until Johnny drops the final bit.
"As seven, you'll go back on stage and announce that NewS is back from hiatus."

"Wait, seven?" Jin blurts out—the first one to do so; the others chime in right after.

"Yes. Kusano and Uchi are going to be demoted to trainees as punishment, and no telling if they'll be back in your group."

They're stunned to silence, and that's the same state they're in when they leave the room. "Trainees," Massu echoes after minutes pass.

"It's gotta be temporary," Tegoshi says—Jin can just hear the hope in his voice. "In time, they'll be back, ne?"

"Sure," Yamapi replies, although he doesn't sound like he has much hope at all. "But for now, we gotta work hard. We're actually coming back."

"Knew this day would finally come," Koyama says, grinning at them. Jin looks around the room, meeting everyone's eyes—hopeful, positive, excited. Nervous, anxious, confused. Scared.

--

2007.

It's not simple for them to come together again—they've all changed in their own way. Yamapi pushes it off as them separating, learning different things and then bringing all those things into a brand new NewS, but Jin knows he's faltering as much as the rest of them.

Tegoshi's older now, more adept at the business—not the innocent kid they remembered clinging onto Massu's arm, hoping everything would be all right. He'd also grown into his looks as well, and even though Shige had been joking, it was like he'd hit puberty.

Massu's responsibility expanded when Tegomass debuted, and he'd taken the brunt of the work, especially when it came to taking care of Tegoshi and making sure that he would be able to deal with the evils of celebrity.

Shige's become more conscientious of everything around him—always calculating the best move, or what people were feeling to act accordingly. He'd also felt the bittersweet taste of being forgotten and lonely—of wondering if quitting was his only solution.

Koyama'd felt helpless during the hiatus, and he'd taken that emotion and turned it into his work—working harder than Jin could remember him ever doing. He became more active all of a sudden, always pushing, pushing and pushing. Jin could see the worry sitting somewhere behind his gaze.

Ryo had gotten used to working with Kanjani8—he's quieter than usual, and always watching, just watching. He isn't as curt as he used to be, more pensive and Jin didn't know if he missed the poison tongue or not. Jin wasn't entirely sure this was a good thing or not.

Yamapi's change is the most drastic, Jin thinks. He’s hard now—having made it in the entertainment industry with a solo single, also messing up and bouncing from it easily (not easily at all if the phone call after the recording at around 6 in the morning was any indication). He's more of a leader than he had been way before, but he's also much colder, more calculating. Jin definitely doesn't like it.

Jin doesn't think he’s changed, not really. Except scattered remarks from the others tell him otherwise.

"You've become more vocal, haven't you?" Shige says during a discussion for their return tour.

"More manly!" Tegoshi chimes.

"Lay off the food already. I know you were starving, but geez." Ryo snatches the bag of chips away from him (which leads Jin to say that Ryo needs to eat more – Jin thinks he only set himself up for that).

"You've been thinking before you speak, haven't you?" Yamapi asks during one of their dinners. "That's weird." Jin refuses to say that Yamapi's been doing the same lately.

"You haven't had much energy. Are you tired?" Massu asks, worry laced in his voice before he hands Jin one of his favorite energy drinks. "It'll help at least a little."

Koyama watches him a lot more than he'd like. "America was rough on you, wasn't it?" he asks when they're resting during rehearsal. "You seem like you were broken." Jin closes his eyes and vehemently denies it—at least, half of the statement is a lie. It isn't America that breaking him though.

In the end, Jin feels like everyone's walking on eggshells.

Maybe even himself. Maybe.

--

"This is ridiculous," Jin mutters under his breath. NewS has been straining at the seams ever since their return, some unspoken tension that nobody can really pinpoint.

"What?" Koyama asks, the closest to him as they relax in the baths after their last concert in Taipei.

"Nothing, nothing." Jin sighs before dunking his head in the water, eyes closed.

That same night in the privacy of their room in the inn, the members of NewS (minus Tegoshi because they refuse to even risk it) get plastered. Tegoshi looks at them with sour faces, sipping on his Coke. "You're all so loud," he complains, one finger pressed in his ear.

"You're just jealous," Jin laughs, an arm thrown around Tegoshi's shoulders. "Just take a sip already."

"No way!" Koyama cries out, knocking Jin's cup out of his grip—Jin stares at the stain spreading on the rug, he sniffles. "We're not going to have another scandal."

"We've had too much of those already," Ryo sniffs, throwing back another cup of sake.

"We say as we spend a night drinking," Massu says—he'd only had a small amount of alcohol, making him the closest to sanity other than the completely sober Tegoshi.

"Oh, come on. Enjoy yourselves. We just finished an international concert," Yamapi sighs, taking another drink himself.

Shige sniffles suddenly; everyone's gaze falls on his shaking shoulders. "You know," he starts, hiccuping. "I love you, guys!"

Jin's mouth falls open, as does Ryo's while Koyama crawls his way over to Shige, hands firmly on Shige's shoulders. "I love everyone too, Shige!" Koyama cries out, pulling Shige into a hug. "Me too!"

Yamapi stares at the sobbing mess before turning to Tegoshi, half-squinting as he does so. "How much has he had to drink?"

Tegoshi scoffs. "Like half a bottle of sake."

Jin stares at the small containers before saying, "Wow, he's a bad drinker."

"He's a newly formed adult?" Ryo says before laughing.

"No really!" Shige cries out, startling everyone. "I think NewS is great. We've gone through so much, and yet. And yet," Shige sniffles again, messily rubbing the back of his hands against his face. "We're still here. Together. Drinking sake like adults."

"Or Coke like a kid," Tegoshi inserts dryly.

"Stop complaining." Jin chucks his pillow at Tegoshi's head. "You have like a month to go, then you can be the slobbering mess." Tegoshi only sticks his tongue out before sucking on his straw.

"Okay, Shige," Yamapi says, moving over to help Shige calm down and pulling the sake bottle away from him. "Let's get you into bed. I think you've had too much to drink."

"I don't ever want us to separate," Shige mumbles, just as they're putting the sheets back on him.

"We won't, don't worry." Koyama nods, trying to add emphasis, or to convince himself—Jin's not entirely sure.

"Then why are we still acting so weird?" Shige whines, sitting back up and kicking away the sheets.

They freeze and Jin exchanges glances with Koyama, eyes wide.

"What?" Ryo asks slowly—as though that would help Shige understand. As though Shige couldn't understand the question.

"We're still awkward. We're pretending that everything's okay. But we all lost something in the hiatus. Like, like. I don't know. Just. Everything's weird." Shige frowns, head tilted to the side as he stares at some point in the floor—trying so hard just to think. "It shouldn't be weird. Not anymore."

"It's not," Koyama says with reassurance. "It's okay between us."

Shige looks up at Jin with puppy dog eyes—at Jin likely because he's the closest. "Really?"

Jin has to close his eyes to answer, dots filling the darkness. "Yeah. It's okay." Jin's not sure if it's the alcohol that's affecting his stomach, but he feels queasy as the words leave his mouth. It doesn't matter because when he opens his eyes next, Shige's conked out on the bed and everyone's just staring at him.

"Is it really?" Tegoshi asks, taking another sip.

Jin looks Tegoshi in the eyes. "You tell me."

Tegoshi never answers him, not unless the sound of him sucking on air and ice is supposed to be the answer.

--

After that night, they all make some sort of weird effort to change—Jin's not sure how he notices, but he does. Ryo pays more attention to everyone's schedule, making sure that everyone does what they're supposed to.

"I know you're tired, stupid, but imagine how mad at yourself you'll be if you don't do your absolute best on that test." Jin raises an eye as he leans against the cafe's table. Ryo hangs up his phone and returns Jin's gaze. "That was just Shige. He has some law test or whatever."

"Nice," Jin says easily, only because he doesn't want Ryo to be embarrassed (Ryo tends to hit when he's embarrassed and Jin would rather not get more bruises; Jin gets teased enough about those).

Jin and Massu end up being semi-teachers, helping out whenever someone needs help with a dance move or a problem with the lyrics or with the melody and harmony. "Can't be helped," is a common phrase for them and the other members frown when they use it.

"You make it sound like we're really sad for asking you for help," Koyama points out, frowning.

"It's never in that sense," Massu insists. "We just think it's funny you come to us for help."

"I'd never go to Jin for help," Ryo snorts.

Jin sticks his tongue out. "Then learn the routine during the bridge on your own." Ryo's eye twitches. Massu cracks up.

"Can't be helped?" Massu asks. Ryo sighs while Koyama shakes his head.

Koyama's calls get more frequent. "Are you eating?" "Are you sleeping properly?" "Have you gone to the doctor lately?" "Have you gotten that new pack of condoms yet?" (The last one being more of a joke text to Jin. He was on a date when it arrived and his date did not appreciated it—Koyama couldn't stop laughing after Jin had told him.)

Tegoshi and Shige become proper adults in more than one sense—realizing the real weight of the job they had as Johnny's idols—not that they hadn't known to begin with. But after turning 20, something inside them switches and they work harder than ever. They seem to become much more aware of themselves—like when Shige got his haircut.

"Holy shit," Jin breathes when Shige walks into the room. Immediately, Shige stops, hand in his hair as he frowns.

"Does it look bad?" Shige asks, worried. "I thought I'd try something new."

Koyama reaches over, eyes wide. "It's so short."

"Is that a mohawk?" Ryo asks.

"Kinda yeah." Shige bites the bottom of his lip.

Massu says cheerfully, "I like it! It looks nice."

Shige blinks at him, then shakily asks, "Really?"

"Mm-hmm!" Massu repeats. Tegoshi agrees along with him. And one by one, the rest of the members chime in their approval for Shige's new haircut.

"Thanks," he breathes out in relief. "I was a little fearful."

"Just glad you didn't come in blonde," Jin jokes, glancing sideways at Ryo who only gives him the middle finger.

"I'm not that crazy," Shige retorts. Ryo uses his other hand to flash Shige the middle finger as well. Jin can't stop laughing.

Yamapi, for his part, tries hard to make sure they were talking more—communicating about the activities and putting things together. Jin realizes he was really growing into his role as a leader—more than he'd been willing to accept only so little years ago.

It's not easy for them, but one step at a time does eventually lead up to the door they'd been searching for all that time.

--

2008.

A year after Countdown, after their return, Jin takes the hands of his band mates as they stare out at the roaring crowd. The lights blind him, but he squints through the pain. Next to him, Yamapi's grin stretches across his face; his grip tightens and Jin's grip tightens in turn. Yamapi laughs loudly. On his other side, Koyama's trying to fight through the tears, but failing horribly.

Jin has to practically scream to be heard, but he does it anyway. "Koyama, you're such a baby!"

"So what!" Koyama yells back, laughing as he wipes back his tears with the back of his hand, refusing to let go.

Down the line, Jin can see the grins and laughter and tears of his band mates—no, close friends. They all exchange glances as Yamapi yells into the microphone. "Sen no!"

In one loud, clear yell without aid of microphones, NewS comes together. "We are NewS!"

Jin feels his heart swell with pride.

ii. But in reality, even now I still want to be a professional soccer player!! (laugh) Rather, when I grow up I'm really going to be a pro soccer player!! I'll take the offer the second it comes (laugh).
- Vivi ~ July 2008

2006.

"Why'd you take this job again?" Hiro snipes as they watch some pop idols try to warm up before challenging them at soccer.

Jin snorts. "Look who's talking. Aren't you standing with me for a reason?"

"Only because someone has to watch over you."

"You just want to kick some idol ass," Jin jokes, grinning as one of the guys in the group—weren't they called KAT-TUN or something?—looks Jin in the eye and smirks. As though he could easily score or block one of Jin's kicks. Jin didn't hold back the roll of his eyes.

"Stop. We're here to make nice," Hiro scolds under his breath.

"Yeah, well, nobody gave them that memo," Jin sneers.

After the idols gracefully receive their challenge (some more gracefully than others—the one with the big nose doesn't seem quite happy with the idea of challenging actual soccer players, especially when the batsu game is something like getting pelted by soccer balls), Jin thinks that this is when the real fun begins.

"Go easy on them," Hiro says before Jin approaches the scoring line. "It's not like they're actual pros."

"But then that'd ruin my fun," Jin snorts. Hiro rolls his eyes at him.

At the end of the game, KAT-TUN manages to get three scores to Jin and Hiro's two and Jin scowls in the back as Hiro pats him on the back comfortingly. "I can't believe you went easy on them," Jin huffs.

"Hey. That's what we were told, okay? It's not like I wanted to do that anymore than you did."

"Sell out."

"Pansy."

"Hey! You're the jerkwad that lost the game," Jin retorts.

"And even serious, you still missed a goal."

Jin pauses. "So my aim got away from me for a second there, so what?"

"Yeah… I don't think our captain will think the same." Jin shoves Hiro before walking across the gym, heading towards the lockers before one of the guys—the bald one—stops Jin to shake his hand.

"Hey! I know we didn't introduce ourselves properly yet, but I'm Tanaka Koki. That was a fun game."

Jin puts on his "I'm only doing this to be nice" smile as he shakes Koki's hand. "Yeah, that was pretty fun. Too bad we lost."

"Well, you were trying to take it easy on us so not surprised."

Jin makes a noise that's half agreement, half aggravation (because he knows the truth of it in the end), then plasters a smile on his face. "You guys did well though." Jin pauses before adding as an afterthought, "For idols anyway."

Koki's eyebrow goes up just as Hiro's hand hits Jin on the back. "Hey, Akanishi. Making buddy-buddy, I see." Hiro gives Koki a nod. "Hey, Taka-"

"Takasaki Hiroyuki," Koki continues with a grin. "The other Urawa Reds forward." When both Jin and Hiro give him raised eyebrows, Koki shrugs. "I follow a little football."

"Oh, really?" Hiro says; Jin can tell he's a little impressed that an idol would even follow any bit of football. "So what'd you think of our last game?"

Jin groans. "You're just bringing that up because you managed to score the winning goal."

"And you're bitter because you missed your goal."

"Screw off."

"And you're epic fail, dude." Jin scowls as Hiro throws an arm over Jin's shoulders. "It's okay. We kinda love you anyway. Or at least, half the team does. The other half thinks you're an ignorant twat, but they're not wrong in that."

"Is that supposed to comfort me because it doesn't."

"It's not supposed to."

Jin throws Hiro a face before Koki starts laughing – Jin realizes that he'd forgotten that Koki had even been standing there in the first place. "Are you guys always like that?"

"Pretty much, yeah," Hiro jokes. "It's our way of showing our love."

"Through abuse? Don't I know that," Koki snorts. Jin raises an eyebrow, but one of Koki's team—no, band mates calls for him. "Well, it was nice talking to you guys and thanks for the game. Maybe next time, we can actually play seriously. There are a lot of football fans in the Jimusho."

"That sounds good!" Hiro says enthusiastically, pulling out his cell phone—from where, Jin doesn't want to know—and gesturing for Koki to give his number.

After Koki leaves and his number successfully saved to Hiro's phone, Jin raises an eyebrow at Hiro. "What was that about?"

"Hey. Do you know the kind of ass you could get hanging around idols?"

Jin rolls his eyes, shoving Hiro away from him. "Fuck that. I don't need idols to get any sort of ass," Jin says over his shoulder as he continues to the locker rooms.

"Do not mock the ass!" Hiro calls out, following behind Jin. "They are precious and we are unworthy of their presence. Unless we are with the mythical idols." Jin gives Hiro a face before shaking his head.

--

Jin meets up with Koki and some of his idol friends not too long afterwards, only because Hiro insisted on his going. And it’s only after Hiro’s whining that he would always go where Jin wants because he's a true friend like that, that Jin folds.

"But if this ends up sucking, I'm out of there in a heartbeat," Jin warns as the two try to make their way to the bar which is practically inaccessible from the main entrance.

"Oh please, they're idols. They know how to have fun."

"You say as if you've known them for ages," Jin says dryly.

"Eh, close enough. Know one, know the rest," Hiro jokes.

"I'm sure they'd love to hear that concept."

"Already heard it," Koki inserts, voice coming from behind them.

Jin jerks back in surprise, meeting Koki's amused expression. "Where the hell-" he starts, but before he can even get the question out, Koki answers it. "Saw you guys coming from the dance floor and thought I'd help you to the bar."

"We're not that helpless," Jin grumbles.

Hiro only elbows him. "Thanks! Where are your buddies?"

"Ah, most of them are on the floor already. Two are probably still at the table, throwing back shots."

Jin raises an eyebrow. "Drinking a fond pastime for you idols?"

"Not for you?"

"Only occasionally, but we like to take care of our bodies," Jin half-sneers.

If Koki hears the bite in his voice, he doesn't acknowledge it, instead pushes them successfully towards the bar. "Well, how about tonight be one of those exceptions?" Koki asks, grinning. Hiro nods towards Jin, his eyes pleading.

"Fine. But only a beer, okay?"

Koki and Hiro cheer, immediately ordering that beer for Jin. That gives Jin the time to turn around and observe the club; the dance floor has parted in the middle, leaving room for the two males—Jin's a little surprised when he realizes that the other person is not a female—grinding along with the beat.

"That's Ueda and Kame," Koki clarifies for Jin (even if he really didn't care to know). "You met them that day too."

Jin blinks, slightly amazed because he can't really remember them – at least not from just the shape of their bodies and the obscured expressions on their face.

Before Jin realizes it, Koki's leading them towards the tables, and the table they stop at is occupied by two people – their table already filled with at least 7 shot glasses, and that's not including the ones in their hand. "God, already?" Koki snorts, raising an eyebrow at the guys. "We've only been here for ten minutes."

"We're finally on break," the brunette half-slurs. "I plan on enjoying tonight with lots and lots of alcohol."

"And maybe some ass," his friend adds, grinning before the two clink their glasses together and throw back their alcohol. Jin winces when one of them makes a guttural groan, visibly wincing at the burn of his drink.

"That's Yamapi," Hiro tries to whisper to Jin, gesturing with his head at the brunette. "And the other one's his best friend, Ryo."

"What the hell, Hiro," Jin hisses. "Do you follow their Jimusho or something?"

"I could've been a Johnny's boy," Hiro grumbles before stepping forward to introduce himself to the other two. Jin frowns before he moves to Hiro's side.

"That's Akanishi Jin," Koki says. "Yamashita Tomohisa and Nishikido Ryo. Other members of Johnny's Jimusho, but they work in another group."

"Nice to meet you," Jin says. It takes him a few seconds to realize why one of those names sounds so familiar and when it finally comes to him, Jin is more than glad that the club's dark so nobody can see him flush.

"Yeah, you too," Ryo says—he sounds more sober than the other one does, who is already slurring through his words.

"How much has this guy had to drink?" Koki asks Ryo.

Ryo shrugs. "By the time I picked him up at his apartment, he was already plastered. Looks like he got an early start."

Yamapi laughs, sloppily leaning an elbow against their table. "Like I said, I'm enjoying tonight." He tilts his head to the side as he stares at Jin with a gaze so intense that Jin looks at the others in panic. "You look slightly familiar," he says, pointing a finger in Jin's near vicinity.

"Well, he's a popular football prayer," Koki supplies, putting his beer down. "You've probably caught sight of him on television or something."

"No, no," Yamapi mumbles. "He looks much more familiar than that. Where are you from?"

Jin raises an eyebrow. "Tokyo?"

"Wow, so specific," Yamapi deadpans, but he doesn't press the issue. Instead, he throws back another shot. Jin frowns, only taking a small sip of his beer. "What?" Yamapi snaps when he sees Jin's eye on him.

"Nothing. Just... You're drinking a lot, aren't you?" Hiro elbows him sharply in the side.

Yamapi blinks, leaning an elbow against the table and trying to get close to Jin without having to actually walk around. "What's it to you?"

Ryo sighs, grabbing the newly filled shot glass from Yamapi's hand. "He's right, you know." Yamapi grabs the shot back and chokes it down before anyone can say anything.

"And I don't give a shit about some stranger's opinion," Yamapi says eloquently before stepping down from the high stool and grabbing Koki's hand, dragging him towards the dance floor—Jin can hear Koki's yelp of surprise, but once his feet touch the floor, Koki doesn't seem to mind.

"Sorry about that. Pi's not usually that high strung," Ryo says, taking a sip of his water. "We're just going through a lot lately." Ryo stops there and even though Jin is absolutely curious, he doesn't ask anything further.

"Ah," Jin says instead, before taking another swig of his beer. He winces a bit as he swallows, wondering what the hell kind of beer this place sells.

"Well, I don't think Koki got the chance to introduce us," Hiro inserts after a minute of silence. "I'm Takasaki Hiroyuki and this is Akanishi Jin. We're from the Urawa Reds." Ryo gives him a blank stare and Hiro falters in his introduction. "A football team?"

"Ah. Football."

Jin snickers before taking another swig. Then pauses when he realizes he's finished his beer. "Hiro," he frowns. "My beer's done."

"Then order some more," Hiro says off-handedly as he takes a swig of his own.

Jin pouts. "Please?"

Hiro raises an eyebrow. "Okay, hold on," he says before walking towards the bar. Ryo snorts loudly and Jin frowns at him.

"Can't order your own drink?" Ryo asks, raising an eyebrow.

"More like take advantage of your kouhais," Jin smirks as Hiro places his new beer in front of him.

"Sure, or you could just say that you're lazy," Hiro snorts.

"But lying's not a good thing, don't you remember?" Jin snickers. He takes another sip and has to wince through it. "Seriously. What is in this drink?"

Hiro only shrugs.

--

“So,” Jin half-slurs. “I could’ve been a Johnny’s boy. I just got rejected, sad sad me.” He slumps his head against the emptied table. Hiro snickers as Ryo raises an eyebrow at Jin.

“What made you want to go into Johnny’s?” Ryo asks, taking a sip of his water.

“Oh. I saw you on television,” Jin admits just as Koki and Yamapi come back to the table.

“You saw Ryo-chan?” Yamapi asks curiously, stealing Ryo’s glass of water from his hand. “In what?”

Jin shrugs. “I don’t remember. It was so long ago. He was so puny. …Well, he still is now, but like, he was an actual child. …Or was he? He might’ve been 15. I don’t remember.”

Koki holds Ryo back in his seat. “Let’s see how good a dancer you are.” Koki says, changing the topic and pulling Jin off his seat.

“I’m sure I have a thing or two to teach you,” Jin sneers as he stumbles his way towards the dance floor.

“Shouldn’t you be stopping him?” Ryo asks Hiro who’s looking at the spectacle in amusement.

“Not at all. I’m sure Akanishi has everything under control,” Hiro says.

Jin has no issues with personal space as he grinds against Koki, swiveling his hips. Koki’s eyes widen for a second before he retaliates in turn, his hand sliding down Jin’s ass to pull Jin in closer. Jin smirks before throwing his head back and just moving to the heavy beat of the song playing. His neck muscles flex under the strain and Koki drags his hand down Jin’s front.

“You’re playing with fire, Akanishi,” Koki mutters as he leans in.

Jin laughs. “No, you are.” His eyes glitter in the dark of the club.

--

Jin opens his eyes to searing pain. “Fuck,” he hisses, pressing fingers to his forehead—pushing away the blanket to do so. He stops suddenly, realizing that the blanket is not familiar to him—since when did he have black silk?—and that he’s half naked underneath the sheets. Jin blinks. “Oh fuck,” he mumbles as he sits up.

When he moves, the body beside him stirs—another half-naked male body.

“Oh fuck,” Jin says again, eyes wide—but another shot of pain causes him to wince.

“Nngh.” The body says and the male turns over to get a good look at Jin. “Who are you?” he asks, voice dry.

Jin stares, not at all recognizing the person behind him. “Aka…nishi Jin,” he manages to say.

The male pushes up from the bed, half sitting as he drags a hand through his hair. “Yamashita Tomohisa.” He gives Jin a once over. “I don’t remember you. Did we fuck last night?”

With the name, Jin finally remembers who Yamapi is. “Er, not sure,” Jin says weakly. “I don’t remember either.”

“Idiots.” the voice comes from outside the bedroom and Yamapi snorts when he hears it. Footsteps start up, approaching the two.

“Ryo-chan,” Yamapi tells Jin, which instantly clicks in Jin’s head—thankfully.

Ryo’s at the doorway, fully clothed—to Jin’s immense glee. He doesn’t think he could handle seeing another half-naked guy—he would really wonder what happened the night before. “You didn’t sleep with each other, don’t worry.” He sips a cup of coffee before continuing. “Just got wasted, conked out and we had to throw you on the bed.”

Jin can’t help his sigh of relief.

“Thanks,” Yamapi deadpans.

“It’s not that,” Jin says. “It’s just that you’re not my type.”

“If you’re one of those guys who denies his sexuality,” Yamapi starts, sucking on an end of a cigarette. “I swear—”

“Not that,” Jin snorts. “I’m well and gay, but you’re just really not my type.”

Ryo smirks. “I called it. After last night, totally doesn’t surprise me.”

“After last night?” Jin asks, a little afraid to find out the truth himself.

“I think you made out with Koki like five times the entire night. Each time longer than the next,” Ryo supplies.

Jin flushes. “Oh.”

Ryo smirks. “Why don’t you lazies get up and come to the table? Breakfast was served hours ago.”

Jin’s stomach agrees whole-heartedly with that statement.

--

About six hours later, Jin finds himself finally leaving Yamapi’s apartment with Hiro in tow (who Jin discovered had slept on the couch while Ryo had taken the guest room). “They’re not half bad,” Jin says, shutting his cell phone with two newly saved phone numbers.

Hiro grins. “Told you idols aren’t half bad.”

“You never said that,” Jin snorts.

“Well, I thought it.”

“Doesn’t count.” Jin then turns to look Hiro in the eye. “By the way, what the hell did you give me to drink last night? That was not beer, was it?” Hiro chuckles weakly.

“It got you to open your shell?” he says.

“Yeah, apparently to the point that I’d spill my early childhood boy-crush on Nishikido. Thanks for that,” Jin says dryly.

“Again, opening of shell.”

“Yeah, and my way of opening your shell—” Jin starts.

“Please don’t finish that,” Hiro pleads. “If I have to hear you make another really bad line, I will leave.”

Jin huffs. “They work on other people.”

“Other drunk people.”

“See if I go out with you again.”

forward to Part 2

4 AUs Where Jin Gets What He Wants and 1 That's Reality. Part 2

Thu, 01 Jan 2009 17:28:59 GMT

Title: 4 AUs Where Jin Gets What He Wants and 1 That's Reality. Part 2
Author: tinyangl
Characters: Akanishi Jin. LARGELY Akanishi Jin. Then you have NewS, KAT-TUN, Urawa Reds Football Players, Original Characters up the Wazoo, Takki, Yabu, Reio, Johnny and Nishiyama Maki (kinda) show up for a second there (blink too fast and you’ll miss it!) And just yes, lots of people in this very massive fic.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Nothing really except cursing. They drink a lot, smoke some.
Summary: Jin's said a lot of things over the years—what kind of different lives would he lead?
Notes: Written for je_holiday to pixisticks, hopefully you'll enjoy this fic and it satisfies the Jin quota. It's a massive fic that probably shouldn't have been as massive as it ended up being. ♥♥ Thanks to my beta (AKA cynicalism) for letting me babble on and on about this fic for so long. For correcting every mistake I've made and helping me better this. It desperately needed it.

Ryo ends up texting him the next day with a simple “soccer game tmr. in?”

Jin can’t help the grin on his face as he excitedly texts back—at first, shaking too much that he kept pushing the wrong number—”hell yes. where n when?”

“txt u w/ details tmr.” Ryo responds back only a few seconds later. “tell hiro he can come too.”

“Akanishi!” Nobuhisa Yamada—the captain—yells in the middle of the soccer field. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

Jin slips his phone back into his bag, hoping nobody’d seen it out, and picks up his bottle of water. “Just a sip of water, captain!” Jin calls out.

“Better only be that,” Yamada snaps. “If you were on your phone—” he says warningly.

“I would never do something stupid like that in the middle of practice.” Jin jogs back onto the field, passing Hiro on his way to his position. “Hiro, tomorrow, soccer game with the idols.”

Hiro snorts. “So you were on your phone.”

“Oh, be quiet.”

Yamada doesn’t take his eyes off Jin the entire practice—Jin makes doubly sure not to fuck anything up.

--

When Jin arrives at the game the next day, sans Hiro as he had a prior appointment, sadly, he finds Ryo with three other guys that he doesn’t recognize in the least. “Hey!” Ryo yells out, calling Jin over.

Jin beams, rushing over, and is immediately introduced to the other players.

“This is Tegoshi Yuya. He works with Yamapi and me.” Ryo points to the smallest one of the group—the one that looked so much like a girl that Jin had been slightly startled when Ryo had said “he.”

“Nakamaru Yuichi. You already met him in that match with KAT-TUN.” Nakamaru gives Jin a nod and Jin realizes that he only remembers him because of his nose—Jin makes sure not to make mention of it.

“And this is our sempai from another group, Nagase Tomoya. He’s plays soccer with Tegoshi all the time so he wanted to tag along,” Ryo supplies.

Jin greets each and every one of them. When he gets to Nagase though, the older man grasps Jin’s hand tightly. “When I heard you could be coming, I definitely wanted to come.” Jin’s eyes go wide. “I’ve seen your games, including that amazing goal in that game against Avispa Fukuoka last month. Nobody thought you’d make that goal and you did that header and it went in. It was amazing.”

“I—”Jin starts, at a loss for words. “Thanks?” he says; he can feel the blood rushing to his face.

“Wow, are you embarrassed?” Ryo chortles as he throws Jin the soccer ball.

Jin bounces it off his stomach, juggling it with his knees then his feet. “Shut up,” he retorts. “Why don’t you let your soccer skills talk for you?” Jin kicks the ball up as he spreads his arms out, gesturing for the others to back away from him. He backflips, kicking the ball mid air over his head and it lands in the goal feet away from where they’re standing.

“Oh fuck,” Nakamaru mutters in amazement as Jin lands back down on his feet, grinning.

“Let’s play soccer,” he cheers before heading onto the field and starting his warm-ups. The opposing team arrives a half-hour later only to be thoroughly beaten. Nagase takes them all out to dinner that night and Jin gets drunk by the end of the night. He shows up an hour late to practice the next morning.

--

“Up for dinner tonight?” Hiro asks as they’re getting changed after practice.

“Sorry. Hanging out with Pi and Ryo,” Jin says, pulling his shirt over his head. “Wanna join?”

“Pass. Don’t want to be the fourth wheel.”

Jin snorts. “Your loss.”

“You know,” Hiro starts, closing his locker door as he turns to look at Jin, who’s fixing his hair in the small mirror he keeps in his locker. “You’ve been spending a lot of time with those guys.”

“What?” Jin asks, playing with his hair before turning to meet Hiro’s gaze. “What’s wrong with that? They’re cool guys.”

“Jin, you’ve been late to practice every day for two weeks now. And you’ve gotten sluggish. Don’t think nobody’s noticed.”

“I just haven’t been sleeping properly.”

“Yeah, because you’ve been out with them every night. Seriously, maybe you need to spend some time away from them.”

Jin huffs. “Don’t worry about who I make friends with, Hiro. I’ll balance it better, okay?” He shuts his locker door. “So back off, okay?”

Hiro frowns as he watches Jin walk out of the locker room—Yamada in the next aisle over does the same.

--

The next day, Jin groans as he stumbles into the locker room after practice. “Shit,” he hisses, his muscles feeling strangely sore—a feeling he hasn’t really experienced to this intensity in a long while. “What the fuck is going on?” he mumbles, massaging the muscles on the backs of his legs.

“Akanishi, I need to talk to you,” Yamada booms as he enters the locker room, the door slamming behind him. Jin winces.

“Way to make an entrance, captain,” Jin says with a flourish—he doesn’t bother to stand though, not that he could with the way his body’s aching.

Yamada towers over him, arms crossed and face stern with eyes set and nose pointed down at him. “You’ve been slacking lately.”

Jin feels his blood drain from his face and go rushing straight to his heart—it pounds faster and faster—before he licks his lips. “Look, I’m sorry about today—” he starts before Yamada interrupts him.

“It’s not just today, Akanishi. You’ve been slacking for weeks. You’re weaker on the field. Your stamina’s shot. Your accuracy is horrible. What’s been going on?”

Jin exhales. “I haven’t really been managing my time properly, that’s all. Been getting busy and—”

“With those idol guys?”

“What?” Jin asks abruptly. “Did Hiro—”

“Takasaki’s been worrying about you.”

“That wasn’t necessary,” Jin bites, his head reeling from the fact that his friend felt it necessary to “rat him out.” “My friends have nothing to do with my performance.”

“Did you go drinking last night with them?” Yamada asks—changing topics so fast that Jin had to make sure that he’d heard the right thing.

“Well, yes, but—”

“And the night before.”

Jin closes his eyes. “Yes.”

“Have you been waking up early to run daily?”

Jin swallows. “No.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because then I wouldn’t get a full 8 hours of sleep.”

“Akanishi, I’m telling you this for your sake. Stop hanging out with them.” When Jin’s eyes snap open, Yamada’s looking at him in concern, and for some reason that sets his blood boiling.

“Look,” Jin snaps. “My friends have nothing to do with this and my private life shouldn’t be under your control. What we do is none of your concern, and yes, I have been dropping the ball lately, but I can fix it easily.”

“That wasn’t an option, Akanishi. You’re self-destructing right now, and if you keep going down this route, forget being a starter in the next game.”

“What?!” Jin yells, jumping to his feet and ignoring the sharp pains that shoot through his body. “That isn’t a fair call!”

“You’re leading me to this decision, Akanishi. It’s either a yes or a no.”

“Fuck you!” Jin snaps.

“Then you’re suspended for a month. Don’t bother showing up to practice tomorrow.” Before Jin can get another word in, Yamada turns on his heel and is out the door.

“Fuck!” Jin yells again, kicking at a nearby locker and then cursing again at the shooting pain. The door edges open and Hiro sticks his head into the room, catching Jin’s eye.

“Look,” Hiro starts, biting his lip.

“Get out,” Jin hisses. “Right now, you’re the last person I want to see.”

Hiro leaves without arguing and Jin lies back on the wooden bench, eyes shut and a leg dangling off the side. “Fuck,” he mumbles to himself as he tries to calm his beating heart.

--

That night, Ryo, Yamapi and Tegoshi take Jin out to karaoke in order to cheer him up. “I’ve found that singing at the top of your lungs really helps to ease the anger,” Tegoshi tells him, passing Jin the microphone.

“I haven’t really ever gone to karaoke,” Jin says sheepishly. “I’m not sure you want to actually hear me sing.”

“Don’t worry,” Ryo says, patting Jin in the back. “With Pi here, you can’t sound worse than him.”

“Isn’t he a singer?” Jin asks curiously.

“Only by name,” Ryo retorts. Yamapi punches him in the shoulder, which Ryo takes laughing.

“And with Ryo here, you’ll get more confident,” Yamapi snorts. Ryo sticks his tongue out at Yamapi while Tegoshi chooses a song from the book.

“Either way,” Tegoshi says. “We’re not judging here, you know. It’s just for fun.”

“I’m in a room with three idols,” Jin says dryly. “That doesn’t inspire confidence.”

Tegoshi laughs—no, giggles is a more accurate description—before passing Jin the book. “Here! How about you sing this song?” Tegoshi asks, pointing down at some KAT-TUN song—Real Face.

“In honor of Koki or something?” Jin laughs as Ryo punches in the numbers.

“Sure,” Tegoshi says.

Jin starts singing to the song and Ryo’s surprised “Oh.” beside him startles Jin to the point that he stops and turns to Ryo. “What?” he asks, feeling the flush come back to his face.

“Nothing,” Ryo says slowly, eyebrows scrunched.

“You’re just surprisingly good,” Yamapi tells Jin. “Better than we expected.”

Tegoshi beams. “Keep going, keep going!” Jin blinks before continuing the song, even adding in the “tsks” that they do.

“Too bad you’re a football player,” Ryo snorts, shaking his head. “You’d make it in the entertainment business no question.”

Jin laughs awkwardly, his ears burning, before he passes off the microphone to Tegoshi who takes it happily, singing about never letting someone go. He catches Yamapi’s flush as Tegoshi leans against his side, swaying along to the music. Jin catches Ryo’s eyes and Ryo winks at him, grinning.

Jin doesn’t admit—won’t admit to it—but Ryo’s words keep him up for the next few days. He refrains from going to karaoke again.

--

It’s really a week and a half into his suspension that Jin realizes that he misses soccer and that not playing or having practice is really getting to him. “free today?” he texts Ryo and Yamapi and Tegoshi and Koki and whichever of the Johnny’s boys he has in his phone book nearly every day.

About a third of the time, Jin succeeds and catches them on their day off, but the other two-thirds of the time, it tends to be a miss and Jin lounges around at home, watching television and catching, by chance, one of his team’s games.

On this day, not only does he succeed but a majority of them are free—to the point that they make plans for a football game that afternoon.

He’s rusty, to say the least—not used to all the heavy exercise even though he’s been trying hard to keep up with his training regime. Although, if he admits it to himself, Jin knows that he’s been slacking in that sense too—it’s not as fun practicing by himself.

“Look, be careful of Tegoshi,” Ryo comes up behind Jin, nodding towards the one in question who’s laughing at something Nagase said. “He’s been practicing lately.”

Jin nods, grinning. “Don’t worry. I know how that kid works.”

The words come back to bite Jin in the ass as Tegoshi fakes past Jin, driving the ball into the goal—pushing the score from the 4-4 tie they had to 5-4, right in the last minute. Jin stares as Nakamaru completely misses the ball—the net flies back in the lower left corner and the other team cheers loudly; Nagase picks up Tegoshi, whooping.

Ryo pats Jin on the shoulder. “Looks like Tegoshi’s gotten better, huh?”

Jin nods slowly, still a little stunned. “Yeah. Practice does a body good, huh?”

“Shouldn’t you know that better than any of us,” Ryo snorts.

Jin doesn’t comment after that.

--

“Hey, been busy lately?” Yamapi asks as soon as Jin picks up his phone. He wipes the sweat from his forehead and chuckles, relaxing on his couch.

“Sorry,” Jin says, lying his head back. “Been trying to get back into the habit of practice before I get back.”

“In a week, right?”

Jin nods. “If they’ll even take me in.”

“They’d be idiots not to,” Yamapi murmurs. “Listen, are you free right now?”

“Yeah, sure. What’s up?”

“Just wanna go out for a drink and talk. Can you?”

Jin chuckles. “Nix the drinks and make it dinner.”

“Deal,” Yamapi laughs.

They meet up at a nearby family restaurant—nearby to Jin, that is. “Did you take the train all the way over here? We could’ve met somewhere closer, you know.”

Yamapi shakes his head, pulling out a cigarette. “I was in the neighborhood.”

“Wow, that is a lie if ever I heard one,” Jin retorts, ordering his food to the waitress right after. “So what’s wrong?”

Yamapi can’t meet his eyes, staring out the window. “I just-” Yamapi starts before stopping, taking a drag from his cigarette and sighing as he exhales. “Look, I don’t normally talk about these kinds of things, but I need someone to listen.”

Jin raises an eyebrow, taking a sip of water. “With me though? Aren’t you closer to Nishikido?”

“Someone outside of the entertainment industry. Someone who’s not already jaded,” Yamapi says.

Jin blinks, a little startled, but he nods. “Okay, if I’m good enough. Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Everything,” Yamapi mutters, leaning his head against a propped elbow. “I know you don’t know much about Johnny’s Jimusho or anything, but my group, NewS, got suspended earlier this year for…Well, just for something.” Jin nods, letting Yamapi know that he’s listening. “So we’re on hiatus or whatever, and in that time, I got a solo single which was okay, even though I didn’t think I could handle doing it by myself.”

“Right,” Jin says slowly as the waitress puts his dishes down on the table, but Jin ignores the food—right now anyway—as Yamapi continues talking, stopping at some points just to smoke.

“But now, the company said that I’m going to be another group.”

“Wait, then what about the other one?” Jin asks curiously—slightly fascinated by how everything works, and at the same time horrified.

“They said this new one’s temporary and they’re still thinking about what to do with NewS which was temporary to begin with.” Yamapi exhales, then lowers his head, lying flat on the table’s surface. “I don’t know, honestly,” Yamapi sighs.

Jin frowns. “Can’t you just tell them you don’t want to do it?”

Yamapi laughs loudly at this, lifting his head to look Jin in the eye. “You’re joking, right?”

“No…” Jin says, blinking. “Is it that absurd? I mean, if you don’t want to—”

“Trust me,” Yamapi laughs again. “It is pretty absurd. They control your life and if you rebel against them, there are repercussions.”

Jin stares at him. “So why do you do it if you’re this miserable?”

“Because,” Yamapi starts, dropping his head back down. “Because I still love this job when it comes down to it.” Jin can’t say a word after that. That’s how it stays for the rest of their time together—Jin silent as he eats his dinner and Yamapi quiet as he looks out the window, still smoking.

Jin counts the days until his suspension’s lifted.

--

A week later and about a month before the next round of games for the J. League, Jin goes back to the soccer field. It feels a little strange to be back, especially because of the looks from the other members—he knows his hair’s gotten longer and the bags under his eyes have disappeared, but Jin feels self-conscious off all their stares.

“Welcome back,” Yamada says gruffly—as always.

“Glad to be back,” Jin says honestly, before throwing his bags into his locker and catching sight of Hiro practicing at the other end of the field. Hiro sees him as well and gives Jin a half-hearted nod, as though afraid that Jin is still mad at him.

Jin grins back, waving wildly which causes Hiro to laugh.

“Get back on the field, Akanishi,” Yamada booms and Jin nods, exaggeratedly saying, “Yes, Captain!”

As he races back on the field, the team calls out their greetings, in various degrees of color. “Oh shit! The girl’s back on the field!” Hajime yells.

“Thought you’d puss-ed out!” Tsuzuki laughs.

“Aw, crap. The month’s already over?” Suzuki sighs. “Akanishi’s brattiness back on the field.”

“Too bad, guys!” Jin yells as he settles on his spot near Hiro. “You’re stuck with me.” He pounds fists with Hiro.

“Back to normal?” Hiro asks.

Jin grins wickedly. “Better than normal. Let’s beat their asses, shall we?”

Hiro laughs. “That’s the Akanishi I remember.”

--

“youre all coming. july 19th bitches. be there.” Jin texts his Johnny’s friends—or idol boys as everyone on the team calls them.

“Seriously, are you gay for them or something?” Suzuki asks, slinging an arm over Jin’s shoulders.

“Not really,” Jin snickers before throwing air kisses at Suzuki. “But I’d go gay for you, baby.”

“Too bad I have a girlfriend, Akanishi.”

“We don’t have to tell her.” Suzuki pushes a laughing Jin into Hiro who shakes his head.

“You’re both idiots,” Hiro says.

“Awww,” Jin pouts. “I think Hiro-chan’s a little jealous. How does a threesome sound, Suzuki-kun?”

“Hmm… Well if it’s Takasaki—”

“Don’t finish that sentence,” Hiro snaps. “I really don’t want to hear it.” Jin chuckles before they enter the locker room.

When Jin runs out onto the field on the 19th—their opposing team being the Albirex Niigata—he turns to look at the seats he’d set aside for his friend. They’re all there, even grumpy Ryo who’d been insistent that he wouldn’t be caught dead cheering for Jin.

Nagase, Tegoshi and Koki are holding up some sign that Jin can’t read with all the smudges and smears. Jin laughs loudly.

Ryo gestures at his phone which prompts Jin to look at his own. “If you lose, I will kill you for making me sit through this.” Jin chuckles before sticking his tongue out at Ryo, putting his cell back beside his water bottle.

“Ready?” Hiro asks him as they rush onto the field.

“More than ever,” Jin breathes.

“Hope you can keep up that optimism, Akanishi,” Yamada retorts from behind them.

Jin grins back at the captain. “I’ll do my best my work.”

At the end of the game, they lose 2-1, but Jin manages to score the only goal. When he scores, everyone’s arms are around him and the cheers throughout the stadium remind Jin of why he does this.

iii. The first image I have when you say the word 'World' is Hollywood. On a world scale, I feel it's the place where the big stars that play an active role gather. Of course the me right now is long long way away from there but in doing this job, I feel that want to become a star so that can get involved there.
- Potato ~ April 2008

2006.

Everyone hears his news through a phone call, not something many of them appreciated if the collection of voice messages to his cell are any indication.

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Ryo snaps in his message. "Not exactly the kind of thing I thought you'd throw in my voice mail, of all things. What the fuck-"

Beep.

"Jin," Yamapi sounds solemn; Jin winces. "I don't know what's been going on, but call me. I don't want us to break ties like this. I know that-"

Beep.

"Akanishi." Pause. "We can't always be waiting."

Beep.

"You have no new messages."

The last message is too short for Jin to be able to skip past—it's the action that matters, not so much whose message—and as such, Kame's words strike inside of Jin. He shuts his cell phone and tries to stop himself from thinking, harping too much on his words. He tucks the phone inside his breast pocket and flattens down his hair, before he steps through the doors of his new talent agency—All Stars United—he hopes it will be anyway.

The lady at the desk gives him a look as he steps inside, lips pursed before she asks him if he has an appointment. Jin can't stop the bubble of accomplishment when he tells her that yes, he does have an appointment. He refrains from adding a, "Ha!" to the end of his statement, no matter how much he wants to.

She doesn't bother hiding her suspicion, nor her contempt as she asks, "Name, please?"

Jin glances down at her name tag—Sandra—he'll have to remember that when he becomes famous. "Aka-" he starts, before stopping and scolding himself for forgetting already. "Jin. Jin Akanishi."

"Okay, Mr. AKAnishi," she says, ripping apart his name even though he just said it a second ago. "Take a seat over there and I'll let you know when Mr. Jenkins is free to see you." She gestures towards the sitting area with one of the fakest smiles that he's probably ever seen—and he's seen more than enough in his business—and proceeds to go on with her work.

Jin hides his sigh—they notice those kinds of things after all—and sits down in an uncomfortable chair. He tries hard not to fiddle with his tie, tries to ignore the growing itch at the underside of his leg, and tries to keep his sanity intact. He only manages the first two. (Jin can vaguely hear Ryo's "You never had any sanity to begin with" retort, but that thought only brings a pang of guilt and homesickness.)

He's not sure how much time has passed before the lady at the front desk calls for him. "He can see you now," Sandra tells him before turning away abruptly, like she doesn't have the time of day to even bother with him.

Jin doesn't take it personally, doesn't have time to as he walks into the Agency's president's office, adjusting his tie. The room is bright, unexpectedly so, and the president, who Jin's only met once before, is busy staring at his computer, glasses at the edge of his nose before pushing them back up once he notices Jin's presence.

"Jin!" he says cheerfully before shutting off his computer screen and pushing away the half-eaten plate of food in front of him. He stands up, gesturing for Jin to sit in one of the chairs in front of his desk and moving around the desk to shake his hand.

"Hi, Mr. Jenkins," Jin greets, wiping his hands off his pants—not that he was sweating or anything—before taking Mr. Jenkin's hand in a firm handshake. He smiles before settling into the left chair. When he looks up, Mr. Jenkins is looking at him with his head tilted, a small smile on his face.

"Anxious, are you?"

Jin half-freezes. "Is it that obvious?" he asks, slightly helplessly. His hands grip the armrests of his chair—he thinks his knuckles are starting to go white.

Mr. Jenkins chuckles, shaking his head. "No, but psychologically, 80 percent of the time, if a patient is more depressed or anxious, they are likely to take the left chair instead of the right chair. Granted, you're not a patient, but I find that the same thing tends to apply to regular people who are only coming in for an interview."

Jin blinks.

"Sorry. I have a degree in Psychology, and I tend to babble on and on about it," Mr. Jenkins says, giving Jin a calming smile. "So, down to business, have you looked over the contract?"

"Yes, sir," he pulls out the contract from his bag – the contract that he'd spent all night looking over and getting advice from Shige of all people.

--

"You don't have any ties to me, not really. No obligations to do this for me. But I'm asking for a favor and I'm really hoping you could just help me out with something," Jin remembers asking. There's a pause before Shige sighs.

"I may regret this," Shige mumbles. "But I'll help you out."

"Great! You'd probably understand this contract better than I could."

Pause. "That's all?!" Shige asks incredulously.

"What did you think I'd ask?!"

"I don't know. You had a dead body left here in Japan that needed moving!"

Jin snorts. "If I needed that, I'd ask Pi."

"Hence the confusion."

"So can you help me out or what?"

With a loud sigh of relief, Shige says, "Sure. Just read it out and slowly."

"In English?" Jin asks, just to make sure.

"In English is fine," Shige replies. The noise of pages being turned can be heard in the background and Jin figures that he's probably pulling out a dictionary of some sort.
They spend hours on the phone—Jin doesn't even want to think about how much he'll have to pay for his phone bill—but in the end, Shige answers every single question he asks. By the time they're finished, both are exhausted and Jin realizes that it's already morning and that he needs to get ready for his meeting—on his second thought, he realizes that Shige's wasted his entire day, and spends a second wondering if he has rehearsal or not.

"Thank you so much," Jin says, hoping that he can show just how appreciative he is just by the sound of his voice.

"It was no problem." Pause. "Signing under a new talent agency?"

Jin freezes—the clock in front of him slowly ticks towards the big 12. "I-"

"Forget I asked that," Shige says in a single breath, stumbling through his words. "I just-I was curious. You don't have to answer-"

"Yeah," Jin says simply—half of him felt that Shige deserved that much from him after everything he'd done to help in that night. "I officially quit Johnny's Jimusho a month ago."

Another pause. "When's the news coming out?"

Jin chuckles. "No clue. But I'm sure they'll paint it prettily enough."

"Sure they won't just say you died in a tragic car accident?" Shige snorts.

"Wouldn't put it past them." Jin plays with the paper in front of him as a period of silence falls upon them.

"Well, I should get to bed," Shige finally says, stopping Jin in the middle of a thought—not sure what he was thinking anyway. "It's late and I have classes tomorrow."

"Right, right." Jin sucks in his breath. "Look, Kato. No one-"

"I know. I'll keep it a secret, Akanishi-kun."

"Thanks again." It takes all of Jin's effort to actually hang up—for reasons he's not entirely sure he knows.

--

"Great! Any problems with it?" Mr. Jenkins asks, taking the contract from Jin's hands.
Jin hears himself ask the questions Shige had advised him to, but he doesn't know really know what he's saying or what response he's getting. But he takes it all in, and Mr. Jenkins looks pleased at the fact that Jin had even though to ask such questions.

"Did I answer everything?"

Jin nods, grinning before he stands up, taking Mr. Jenkin's hand into his. "Thanks for this opportunity."

"Don't say that yet," Mr. Jenkins warns. "It won't be an easy ride. Breaking into the entertainment industry is anything but simple."

Jin snorts lightly. "Trust me. I understand that really well."

"Well, Jin," Mr. Jenkins says—saying Jin's name in the "wrong" way that Jin's become much adjusted to. "I will definitely call you if anything pops up our way."

Jin nods, shaking Mr. Jenkin's hand firmly. "Thank you again, sir. And have a good day."

Jin leaves the office, throwing on a jacket—just one jacket which makes it feel like it’s not winter, Jin thinks, but he is in L.A.—feeling like he's done something absolutely scary and insane. But right now, in this moment, Jin's more than ready to make the leap.

--

The jobs don't come in easily—at least, not as easily as Jin would like them to. He even picks up a part-time job at a nearby supermarket in order to help pay for his bills and for his health—food is important, after all. But he can't say that Mr. Jenkins isn't trying. He gets random scraps of work—a commercial extra here, a movie extra there, a body double in another place (that'd been a bit of a surprising job). Jin's just used to automatically getting the big jobs especially since he's already put in all the work before it.

In Japan, Jin reminds himself constantly. He's not back home, not where he's gotten such an easy ride. At least not anymore.

He gets a call from Yamapi a month later, one that Jin actually takes in favor of the textbook sitting in front of him—it's awkward and short, but Jin doesn't care, because there's something about hearing his best friend's voice that reminds him so much of home.

"I'm coming to L.A." Yamapi suddenly says in the middle of the conversation—they'd pointedly avoided from mentioning anything about Jin leaving the Jimusho, so the sudden announcement shocks Jin.

"Pi," Jin starts. "That's not really necessary. You don't have to check up on me, you know."

Yamapi chuckles lightly. "That's not why I'm going," he says.

"Then why would you—"

"Because it's for work."

Jin pauses, unsure if he wants to expand on that. "What work?" he asks slowly.

"A photoshoot. NewS' calendar photoshoot." Jin thinks Yamapi sounds like he's practically preening on the other line, not that he can blame him.

"Are you guys back together?" Jin asks, not even bothering to keep the awe from his voice.

"Not yet. But come Countdown…" He lets the words hang there, but Jin figures what the end is going to be.

"Oh, wow," Jin murmurs. "That's amazing, Pi. "

"I know. It's been a tough year."

"Un," Jin mumbles—wondering if Yamapi's implying more than one thing. "It really has been tough for you guys. I'm so glad."

Jin can hear the smile in Yamapi's face. "Okay, I have to get back to work, Jin."

"Oh! Well, then take care and we definitely have to meet up when you come over here."

"Definitely," Yamapi says firmly. "You'd better show us around town."

Jin laughs. "And then some. Talk to you later." When he hangs up, he feels his stomach plummet and Jin closes his eyes, putting his phone back down on his desk next to his open textbook.

Jin can't study for classes that night.

--

Jin wastes the entire month somehow—he's not even sure himself. After he got news of Yamapi's impending visit, Jin hadn't been able to concentrate—which is bad when he has finals to look forward to.

"How'd you do?" his friend Brett asks him as they come out of their English class.

"Huh?" Jin starts, turning to him with wide eyes. "Were you always—" he starts before shaking his head. "Um, yeah. I don't really know."

"You've been out of it lately, Jin." Brett slaps a hand against Jin’s back. "Wanna go drinking tonight?" he offers.

"I'll pass," Jin mumbles before waving at Brett, heading in the opposite direction.

--

2007.

Jin doesn't know how time went so fast, but next thing he knows, he's waking up one morning, stomach churning as he plans out his day with the NewS members.

Except there's only two of them at the meeting spot when he gets there. "Just you two?" Jin blurts out abruptly, eyes wide at the sight of only Yamapi and Ryo.

"Nice to see you too, sunshine," Ryo snaps, arms crossed. "I knew we shouldn't have-" Before Ryo can finish his obvious thought, Yamapi elbows him sharply in the stomach.

"The others thought we should get some time together," Yamapi explains. "So we have you all to ourselves."

Jin blinks before snorting. "Should I be worried?"

"Shouldn't it be the other way around?" Ryo retorts. "We're on your turf after all."

"Oh," Jin says. "That is true."

"Look what you did. You gave him ideas," Yamapi says accusingly.

"Someone has to."

Jin shoves Ryo, laughing. "If you guys are done insulting me, I had plans to rock your world."

"I hope you don't mean in bed." Ryo laughs.

"I didn't, but if you want me to." Jin wiggles his eyebrows in Ryo’s direction before Ryo shoves him into Yamapi who yelps.

"I wasn't part of this!"

"You're always part of this," Ryo retorts.

Yamapi huffs. "You both suck."

"I don't, but I can't speak for Akanishi. Tell us, Akanishi, blow jobs or hand jobs?"

Jin groans loudly. "You're an asshole." Jin starts to walk away from them, Ryo's laughter trailing behind him.

"Damn it, Ryo. I think he's actually leaving."

"I don't think it'll take that much effort to follow him, idiot."

"Shut up and just move," Yamapi hisses.

Jin can't stop laughing.

--

At the end of the day, Jin takes Yamapi and Ryo back to his apartment—pointedly ignoring the wrinkle in Ryo's nose as he takes in Jin's puny place with only enough room for a bed and the kitchen right next to the door; thankfully, the bathroom is in another room, but it’s the size of a closet.

"Wow, this is where you live," Ryo deadpans as Jin leads him into the place, patting the bed for either of the two to sit.

"And where will you sit?" Yamapi asks, frowning as he looks around the room.

Jin pulls out a fold-up chair from inside his closet—a closet that he had to feel up the wall just to find out where it was exactly—and plops it in front of them, grinning as he does so. "I make do," Jin tells them.

Yamapi and Ryo exchange looks before Yamapi says, in a strangely stern voice. "Jin, look. We—We just wanted to talk to you about quitting the Jimusho."

Jin's smile quickly turns into a frown. "Guys, I know that—"

"I think it's plain stupid," Ryo says cutting Jin off.

Jin blinks; the next second his heart pounds furiously and his whole body goes cold. "Ryo. I don't need—"

"Obviously you do," Ryo snaps.

"You don't even know what I was going to say!" Jin hisses, standing up with his fists tightly clenched at his sides.

"I'm sure it wouldn't be too difficult to figure it out," Ryo sneers.

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

Yamapi stands up abruptly. Ryo and Jin both turn to him, blinking. "Stop it. We didn't come here just to tell Jin that we don't agree with his choice."

"Maybe you didn't," Ryo retorts; Yamapi glares at him.

"Ryo," he snaps. Ryo looks away from both Yamapi and Jin, not saying a word. Yamapi sighs, sitting back down on the bed and facing Jin. "Look, we're not saying we completely disagree with this," Yamapi starts; Ryo snorts, but the other two ignore him. "We're just worried that you don't understand what you're getting yourself into."

Jin frowns. "Look, I've thought-"

"Are you sure? When's the last time you had a job?" Yamapi asks, his arms crossed.

"Just because I didn't have one just last week doesn't mean it's not working for me," Jin snaps. "It takes time and work, and you know that better than anyone else!"

"Exactly! And that's why I think you should go back to Japan, where you know that you'll do fine!"

"So you want me to go back to Johnny with my tail between my legs and beg for my job back?"

"Yes!" Ryo answers, speaking up. Yamapi turns to look at him; Jin’s frown only gets deeper. "I don't care anymore about his feelings," Ryo hisses, facing Yamapi before he turns to Jin. "It's not just you, you know. Not only are you making an idiotic move, but you're ruining your group by doing this. Nobody's going to say anything because they think they're "supporting" you, but they probably resent you for the mess you've left on their laps." Ryo exhales roughly.

Yamapi frowns at Ryo. "Done?"

"No, but I thought that was enough for now."

Jin looks at Ryo; there's no longer a frown on Jin’s face, his lips pursed. "I'm done though," Jin says gruffly.

"What's that mean?" Ryo snaps.

"I want you both out of here."

Ryo's face drops. "You're fucking kidding."

"No. I don't want you here if you're only here to criticize me. I would've thought my best friends would've come to support me. But I was wrong."

"Jin," Yamapi starts, but Jin quickly interrupts. "No, I don't want to hear anything anymore. Just go." The two stand up and Jin quickly ushers them out the door, pushing them out as soon as he gets it open. Yamapi turns just before Jin can get it started. "I'm sorry," Yamapi says.

Jin snorts before giving Yamapi a dry smile. "Yeah. Oh and by the way, congratulations," he snaps right before he slams the door on their faces.

He stands by the door, hearing the muffled sounds of Ryo and Yamapi arguing and their footsteps as they walk away from his apartment. Jin shuts his eyes, exhaling, and then collapses onto the floor.

Jin refuses to take Yamapi's or Ryo's calls for the next few weeks. They stop calling after two months.

--

Jin manages to get his first speaking role only three months into the new year. "What, really?!" Jin exclaims into his phone, clutching onto his table almost having fallen over his chair from Mr. Jenkins' call.

"I mean, it's not a leading role or even a supporting one," Mr. Jenkins clarifies. "But this director likes re-using his extras. If you get on his good side, he might start hiring you for more jobs."

"I don't mind at all! I'll take it!" Jin exclaims before Mr. Jenkins agrees and they hang up. Jin can't stop himself from pounding his fist into the air, yelling excitedly. His neighbor pounds on their connecting wall, yelling, "Shut the fuck up in there!"

Jin lowers his voice, but still continues jumping around his room happily.

Shooting's only a week after the phone call, a lot sooner than Jin expected, but he's prepped and more than a little excited to have a speaking role. When he gets to the set, introducing himself, very little people can notice him when some guy—sleek black hair wearing sunglasses and a leather jacket—starts screaming at some aide that they'd gotten his drink completely wrong and who did they think they were.

Jin blinks, watching the guy dump his drink out in front of the poor little boy who's steadily shrinking before the brunette thrusts the glass at him. "And next time," the guy snaps. "Get it right." The aide scurries off, clutching the glass tight to his chest.

"God. Why does that asshole get so many jobs? He screams at everyone," one of the set people at Jin’s right comments to another.

"Who even knows," the other replies before they walk off.

" You're Jin, right?" a man says, approaching Jin with a smile.

"Yes, sir." Jin almost bows, before remembering that that isn't what they do in America. He quickly sticks out his hand and shakes the man's hand.

"Well, it's great to see you. I'm the director, Kelvin Smithson." He smiles at Jin, leading him across the set. "I heard good things about you from Jenkins, so I expect professionalism, okay?" Jin nods just as they hear something shatter and once again, it's from the man in the leather jacket.

"You're fired!" he screams at the aide who whimpers as the man stands over him, shattered glass littering the floor around them. Jin's eyes go wide.

Kelvin sighs. "That's Everett Calvin. He's this big up-and-coming star, but he's a bit of a troublemaker. If you'll excuse me, Jin?"

Jin nods; his eyes have never left the scene in front of him. He watches as Kelvin approaches Everett, saying something as some of the set people help the aide out of the way, sweeping up the glass. Jin frowns. This kind of thing would never have worked back in Japan.

--

"Hey, you're the newbie." Jin turns around to see Everett standing behind him in his dressing area—his eyes go wide again.

"Um, yeah," Jin mumbles. "Jin Akanishi."

"Nice to meet you. Everett Calvin," he introduces—cordially to Jin’s surprise—before extending his hand to shake Jin's. "Just wanted to let you know you did good today."

Jin snorts. "Are you making fun of me? I only had two lines."

Everett shrugs. "We all start small. Plus, I can tell that Kelvin thought you had some kind of potential."

"Again," Jin says. "Only two lines."

Everett grins wickedly. "Well, maybe next time you'll get three."

Jin blinks. "You seem nicer than you seemed out there."

"Oh that," Everett comments nonchalantly with a wave of his hand. "That was just for show." Jin blinks again and Everett leans in to whisper. "You get noticed more when they see you can turn off the diva persona and actually act." Everett pulls back, smirking. "Trust me. I wouldn't be getting so many jobs now if it wasn't for this piece of advice."

"Really?" Jin mumbles, frowning. "I don't know. It just doesn't seem—"

"Like it should work? I know. But Americans like their assholes," Everett says before winking and pulling on his sunglasses. "You look like you could become big, newbie. How about I get your number and I can teach you about America and its ways?"

Jin can't really find a reason for him to say no, so he gives Everett his phone number and watches as Everett leaves, with promises to call Jin soon so they can hang out "or something."

The next evening, he gets a call from Everett.

Only a week later, he gets another speaking role—with three lines.

--

It's not for another two months before Jin decides to take Everett's advice—only because he's gotten a little tired of the one line jobs—not that he's not grateful or anything. But there's something to be said when in 5 months, all his jobs equal up to 10 lines.

He almost forgets about it even until Everett brings it up. "Dude, have you been doing anything about this?"

Jin takes a sip of his drink—some alcoholic concoction that Everett said would make him well and wasted—before sighing. "I've been doing well! Even Mr. Jenkins says so. But I guess people are still wary or something. I don't know."

"Did you try what I said?"

"What? Hit on the help? I don't think—"

"Not that, stupid. I meant the advice on being noticed."

Jin snorts, downing the rest of his drink. "I don't know. Acting like an asshole does not seem like the thing that'll get me jobs."

"Trust me," Everett says smoothly before ordering their next round of drinks.

Jin doesn't trust Everett at all—not when he said stupid things like "Trust me, the chicks love it when you insult them. Repeatedly." They don't. Not at all.

But once he remembers what happened the first time they met, Jin is inclined to believe that maybe, maybe his advice could work. That's what Jin reminds himself anyway when he's screaming at some intern/aide/nameless drone about how everything is wrong and what was the matter with them that they couldn't follow "simple" instructions.

"Hey!" the director yells from across the set.

Jin looks up, steeling himself before meeting the director's eyes. "Yes, sir?" he asks—keeping his voice from cracking.

"Is there a problem here?"

Jin throws him a bright, obviously forced, smile. "No, sir. Just trying to get things done."

"Okay then."

Jin turns back to the aide. "Do you understand now?" he snaps.

"Yes, sir," the person squeaks before running off and getting Jin his new drink—or sandwich, Jin's forgotten which he’s protesting.

To make up for his actions, Jin puts on the best act that he can; he delivers all six lines without having to do anything over—not that he ever had to.

A week later, he gets a better role to his surprise. "You must've done something good," Mr. Jenkins tells him over the phone. "This director actually asked for you."

Jin freezes and already he can hear Everett’s pleased "I told you so." in his head. He wonders how long he can hold off telling Everett his advice actually worked—hopefully never.

Everett gets it out of Jin the next night. "I told you so."

--

Jin's job ends up being relatively simple—just a few lines, a random friend of the main character who doesn't speak too much (eats a lot though, Jin likes that part), and he does his job amazingly well—if he can say so himself. Behind the scenes, Jin acts as professionally as he did all those times before—insistent that Everett's advice was not what got him his role.

Except his next job is shit—only one fucking line—and even when Mr. Jenkins is telling him over the phone that it takes a bit of time and getting a less than good job doesn't mean a thing—"it builds character!"—Jin knows that Mr. Jenkins doesn't believe in what he’s saying.

Jin hates to admit it, but he actually thinks Everett has struck something good with this acting out business.

So he does exactly that—acts out.

That one line job leads to another random friend to the main character role to a larger supporting role. And that's only in a year.

Except, he gets it on such horrible terms that his reputation takes a bit of a beating. Not that he necessarily cares right now—Jin's used to horrible rumors attached to his name.

--

2008.

Jin’s prepping for a new role—another supporting role that, if he does well, will lead him to that illusive leading role—while some lady’s putting make-up on his face when his phone goes off and the person who’s calling is someone he didn’t think would ever call him again.

Hell, he’s half surprised that the other person still has his number.

Jin answers despite thinking it’s a bad idea. "Hello?"

"Jin?" the voice on the other line asks slowly.

Even though Jin knows who’s calling and he had picked up the phone regardless, hearing his voice is a completely different thing. “Pi,” Jin mumbles. “Hey. How are you?”

“Good,” Yamapi says. “You seem to be doing well too. I heard about your big role.”

Jin’s eyes go wide, but he manages to keep his voice in neutral. “Oh, have you? I’m really excited about it. I heard that if I do well for this, I could get my first leading role.” He knows he’s bragging—can’t stop himself from bragging really.

Yamapi chuckles on the other line. “Well, congratulations and good luck, Jin. You deserve it.”

One line—It only takes one line and Jin breaks inside. He forces himself to act okay. “So what’s up? You. We haven’t spoken for a year.” Jin half-stumbles on his words, not used to speaking in Japanese after so long—he hasn’t forgotten it though.

Yamapi hesitates. “I-” he starts before stopping short.

Jin chuckles. “The way you’re acting, it’s like you’re about to tell me someone died.” Pause. “Wait, nobody died, did they?” Jin says abruptly, standing up in the make-up trailer. The make-up artist looks at him darkly and Jin only sneers.

“No, no,” Yamapi responds, to which Jin sighs.

“Speak up then!” Jin snaps, sitting back down. The make-up artist goes back to work. “You made me think you were going to say that Pin died or something.”

“Pin’s fine,” Yamapi says. “I’m just… I’m wondering how to say this.”

“Just straight out, Pi. You know I’m the type who likes things straight out.”

“You’ve become an asshole, haven’t you?”

Jin blinks. Then pauses. Then blinks again. “Excuse me?”

“I told you, I heard about your role. What I didn’t tell you is that I learnt it through gossip magazines.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jin snaps—hands clutching at the arm rests. He thinks his knuckles are going white, but he can’t see anything through his fury, much less check it.

“That your reputation in America has caught Japan’s attention. That anyone can tell you’re acting like a real asshole. And I’m wondering what happened to the Jin that I left in America,” Yamapi retorts—the anger in Yamapi’s voice simultaneously guilts and angers Jin. “I thought you were better than that, Jin.”

“Fuck you!” Jin hisses. “You talk like you’re all high and mighty, but from what I remember, you had no faith that I could make it for a second here. And now that I’m making a name for myself, you’re telling me that I’m “better than that”? What the fuck is that supposed to mean, Yamashita?”

Yamapi’s quiet on the other line for a minute, before he says, “I’m telling you that maybe being in America isn’t for you if you’re changing, Jin. If you’re becoming someone who’s only thinking of better and bigger when you went to America to be a star. Is being a jackass the same thing as being a star now? Or has that changed like you have?”

“You have no right to tell me this kind of shit, Pi,” Jin snaps just as the make-up artist frantically gestures that she’s done. Jin gives her a curt smile before leaving the trailer, heading towards his own. “You left me alone a year ago when I needed you to be a supportive friend. And you’re still not being supportive in the least.”

“Because you don’t need supportive, Jin. You need someone that’ll be straight-forward and tell you like it looks like.” Jin stops in his tracks. “And it looks right now like you’re being an asshole just because you know you can get away with it. Your rewards are better fucking roles that you’re only getting because you’re being talked about. Not because your acting is good—and just so you know, you did a lot better with your smaller roles. So don’t tell me I left you alone.”

Jin swallows. “You’re wrong, you know.”

“No, I’m right and you know I’m right, but you’re being stupid and stubborn,” Yamapi snaps. “Maybe now you’ll think twice, Jin. I’ll talk to you later.”

Jin doesn’t even get to reply before Yamapi hangs up. He kicks a nearest wall and has to resist from screaming at the top of his lung.

Jin snaps at people more that day than he’s ever done before.

He even snaps at Everett that evening at dinner; Everett snaps back that he should leave work at work. Jin apologizes a second later, hoping that Yamapi feels guilty in some way for making Jin as mad as he is.

--

Mr. Jenkins calls him to the office a week later, telling him in a stern voice that it was important and that he shouldn’t miss this meeting. Jin isn’t sure what to make of the meeting but he goes anyway, flirts with Sandra—still a secretary after a year and a half—and enters the office when Mr. Jenkins is free.

“Sit down, Jin,” he says, moving around his desk to sit in his chair. Jin goes to the left chair before stopping and changing to the right one.

Mr. Jenkins chuckles. “You still remember that, huh?”

Jin snorts. “Hard to forget. So why’d you call me in, Mr. Jenkins?”

The man in front of him purses his lips, and the move makes Jin freeze—he feels like it’s a flashback to when he’d gone to Johnny’s office. Jin suddenly wonders if he’s going to be punished for something, anything. “Don’t make that face, Jin. I’m not here to punish you.”

Jin lets out his sigh of relief. “Then why am I here, sir?”

“I’ve been concerned about you, Jin. You’ve been acting strange lately.”

Jin blinks. “Um, I… guess?” he says, trying to stop his heart from beating so erratically—like he’s guilty of something. “I haven’t noticed it myself,” he lies.

“I’ve been getting a lot of calls, more than usual, Jin. And they’re complaining about your attitude on set. That you’re acting ungrateful and that you’re turning people away with your actions,” Mr. Jenkins informs him—he doesn’t sound like he’s judging and that twists the knife in Jin’s stomach a little deeper.

Jin licks his lips. “Listen, Mr. Jenkins. I-” he starts, but Mr. Jenkins cuts him off.

“I’m not here to tell you to behave, Jin. I just wanted to tell you what’s been going on and that I’m a little concerned. I don’t want to say that you’ve changed since you first arrived because that sounds cliché and annoying. So I won’t. I’ll just say one thing. You don’t have to act out to get noticed. At least, not anymore, Jin. I signed you to this agency because I knew that you were talented.”

Jin hates that Yamapi’s voice is suddenly echoing in his head. “Mr. Jenkins,” he starts—his voice cracking as he says it.

“You don’t have to say anything, Jin. Don’t worry about it.” He gives Jin a smile, a smile that Jin doesn’t feel he deserves at this moment. “How about we talk about your next gig?”

Jin swallows, then nods. “Sure. What is it?”

“A lead,” Mr. Jenkins says, grinning. “You got your first lead role.”

Jin stares then whoops loudly. Mr. Jenkins laughs; Jin joins in a minute later.

Afterwards, Jin makes it his first move to call Yamapi and apologize—then to cheer about his new role. Yamapi’s just as happy as Jin is.

--

Jin doesn’t know what to think when Kame calls him up half-way through the year telling him that the group’s going to L.A. “What?” Jin asks—at a complete loss of words. “You’re what?!”

“Going to L.A., Akanishi,” Kame says dryly.

“Just you?”

“What? No, the group’s going. We’re having a photo shoot there.”

Jin blinks, suddenly remembering that KAT-TUN’s still together, even if the “A” isn’t there anymore. “Oh.” Jin opens his mouth, trying to say something else. “Oh,” he ends up repeating.

Kame sighs. “The next words should be “I’ll meet up with you guys.”“

“Right,” Jin licks his lips—his mouth feels dry suddenly. “We should meet up.” Somehow, saying the words make him more freaked out than he had been five seconds ago.

“You could at least sound like you mean it,” Kame snaps.

“It’s not that,” Jin mumbles. “I’m just a little—” he starts, then shakes his head. “No, I do want to meet up with everyone. When are you coming?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow!” Jin says shrilly—he can practically hear Kame’s eyes roll on the other line. “No, that’s cool! Really soon, but great! I’ll… I’ll totally be ready.”

Kame laughs on the other line—smooth and fluid, a sound Jin’s not used to hearing. “We could meet later, you know. We’re there for a week.”

Jin lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “That’d be great,” Jin says. “If that’s okay, I mean.”

“Yes, Akanishi, it’s fine.”

“See you on Thursday then?” Jin asks tentatively.

“Thursday’s fine. We’ll see you then.”

When Jin hangs up the phone, he licks his lips and clutches his cell. “Shit,” he mumbles—it’d been too long since he’d seen his group. He’s not even sure how to deal with them anymore. He has to remember everything and more in three days time. Jin’s not sure he can do it without killing someone.

Except, it looks more like they’re about to kill someone than he is.

“Hi,” Jin says weakly as he sees them huddled at the corner near the restaurant they’re going to, mumbling to themselves.

The first one to face him, Nakamaru, grins and waves, calling him over. “Hey, Akanishi. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

Jin nods, shifting from foot to foot. “Yeah, um. Should we go inside?” Jin asks, gesturing towards the door. They nod; a few murmur their agreement. Jin starts towards the door, the other five follow behind him.

At the table, the air’s tense and nobody says a word. They all stare at their menus for lack of anything better to do, and when the waiter comes to collect their orders, KT-TUN throw Jin worried glances. Jin chuckles for a second before asking the waiter for a little more time.

“If you guys didn’t understand, you could’ve asked me in the first place,” Jin laughs.

“You seemed really focused on your menu,” Nakamaru insists.

Jin laughs again. “Okay, okay. Let’s figure this out first.”

It takes them only another 5 minutes to figure out their order—and their waiter only returns and leaves one time before they’re ready.

“So what are you guys shooting?” Jin asks curiously, leaning his elbows against the table.

“It’s for an album booklet,” Koki explains. “The Jimusho wanted to go all out, I guess.”

Jin laughs. “You guys have been doing well, huh? An album,” he breathes.

They exchange glances before Ueda pipes up. “And you?”

Jin blinks. “Um. I’ve been doing well enough,” he says—unsure of how he should phrase it really. Not because he feels like he would be bragging, of course not.

“You didn’t used to be so shy about your work,” Kame snorts, eyes meeting Jin’s.

Jin flushes. “It’s just… Okay, so I got my first lead role about a month ago. It’s nothing bi—” he starts, then rolls his eyes. “Okay, so it’s a big fucking deal and I’m ecstatic to get it, and really, what did you guys want to hear me say?” He frowns.

“Don’t be so defensive,” Taguchi chimes. “We’re not on the offensive.”

Jin side-steps that one. “Then what—”

“We wanted to congratulate you,” Koki says—although he says it grudgingly. “Look, none of us really thought you’d succeed as much as you did, and we wanted to say.”

“Congratulations,” Ueda finishes. “You did what you wanted.”

Jin doesn’t think he’s breathing anymore. “You’re not mad?”

“We were,” Koki snorts. “Especially in the beginning.” Koki gives him a meaningful look and Jin has to choke back to his snicker.

“And then we got angry again when those rumors came out that you were a mean asshole in America,” Nakamaru continues.

“But we’re okay. We’re all stronger than that,” Kame finishes.

Jin gives them all a bright smile—he doesn’t think he’s ever grinned this widely.

“So buttering done, let’s toast to us!” Taguchi cheers. The table collectively groans before breaking into laughter. Jin raises his glass, clinking it against the others’ glasses.

“So big question,” Nakamaru mumbles around his spoonful of food about a half hour later.

“Hmm?” Jin asks, turning away from his conversation with Ueda.

“How do you feel about going back to KAT-TUN at some point? Leaving America behind and coming back to Japan?” Nakamaru asks after swallowing.

Jin blinks, stares really before shaking his head. “No way. I can only get better and better here. Japan’s not for me anymore.” He pauses before adding on. “Not that it’s bad there or anything. It’s just—”

“You don’t have to continue,” Koki snorts. “We got the point.”

“Good,” Kame says suddenly, smiling at Jin from across the table—for the first time that day. “If you’d actually said yes, I would’ve had to hit you or something.”

Jin laughs. “You, hit me? Really?”

“Hey! I learnt a thing or two from One Pound Gospel,” Kame retorts.

Jin pauses. “Wait, what?”

“Oh, you are out of the loop!” Nakamaru laughs, before proceeding to tell Jin all about Kame’s drama. Jin doesn’t stop laughing that night, can’t stop laughing—it’s like he had forgotten just how much fun his old group was. Jin looks around the table, at the random conversations happening and the smiles. He’s not technically there anymore, but they’re still and always will be KAT-TUN, rooting each other on in their own way—even with one of them across the ocean.

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